For those who are currently in a committed relationship, if something happened to that relationship, for whatever reason; If that relationship was a heterosexual one, would you think about trying to develop a gay or bi relationship the next time, or would you stay heterosexual?
There have been times in my life, when I had a male lover, who I felt I would have been satisfied to remain in that relationship with, indefinitely. At other times, my partner was a woman, who provided the same warmth and caring. The persons I was with, at the time, filled my physical, intellectual, and emotional needs....and I was able to fill their needs, too.
BUT, being bisexual, I have been a victim of the much discussed Pendulum Affect........ where, no matter how fulfilled and happy I was with one gender, the desire for the other gender often arose.
I am presently in the best imaginable relationship, having both genders in my life.
So, I would say, for me, I have needed and will always need to be with both genders.
I would definitely give it a try. As much as I think about sucking cocks and being with other men, I would probably be a pretty big slut if something like that happened.
not married/in a relationship not even close.........hope i can reply anywaysi wouldn't rule out sleeping around with guys under the right circumstances if i was single, which i am now as i said
u got std's & other things to think about so chances are, it wouldn't happen as much as avaialble, but u never know. maybe be open to 1 or more fwb's. but i'm not at all interested in anything romantic & longterm with a guy.
No, not interested ina man as my prinary relationship
Would stay Bi. Would try to look for a swinging/accepting mate.
Regardless of who I'm in bed with or in a relationship with I am Bi. I love the sexual intimacy I have with men and women alike, as for emotional intimacy (romance) I only have felt that connection with women. Short of that changing I can't see becoming involved with a man beyond being FWBs.
And should that ever change and I found myself in a romantic relationship with a man I still would not have "gone gay" I'll be bisexual.
*cough hetero-centrism alert cough*
I've been in a wonderful relationship with another woman monogamously for the past 30 years. If something happened, I would absolutely consider having a relationship with a man (though (a) I've decided that I will never enter another relationship with 100% monogamous expectations, and (b) I would absolutely not consider it or call it "going straight", even if it *was* monogamous).
I hope my achievements in life shall be these: that I will have fought for what was right and fair, that I will have risked for that which mattered, that I will have given help to those who were in need...that I will have left the earth a better place for what I've done and who I've been. (C. Hoppe)
Like a couple of other posters, I am not currently in a committed relationship. The only 2 committed relationships I've been in were with my 2 ex-wives. I loved them both very much, but both marriages eventually went south...the 1st one after 20 years, the 2nd one after 11 years. My 1st wife and I were swingers and she is who coaxed and encouraged me to try mm sex in 4somes and 3somes. I have her to thank for helping me discover my bi side and for our beautiful daughter, but that's about all for which I am grateful to her LOL . I "kind of" went gay after we split up. By that I mean that I still dated and had sex with women, but I put myself out there out there and explored 1 on 1 sex with men more frequently. That is when I came to know the full extent of my desire for and attraction to men. But then I met my 2nd wife and gave up my bi/swinging desires for her because I committed myself to her. She had a secret married bf the whole time we were together and when I found out, I left her. I could kick myself in my ass for giving up bi sex and swinging for those 11 years for her. Again, within 2 weeks of leaving her, I was again engaged in dating women, frequent mm sex and swinging sex. As others have said, I have no desire for emotional/love/longterm relationships with men and can't imagine ever going totally gay. I would be capable of a love relationship with a new woman, but even so, I won't ever again commit to any exclusive relationship with a woman either. I love my personal and sexual freedom and independence too much to ever give up women for men or men for women.
I will always label myself bisexual unless I completely lose sexual interest in one gender and am only interested in the other. I can't see that happening, though. I do meet more men for sex than ever before and I date women only occasionally and am in no hurry to meet the right one for me, so I guess I could be considered to be "going gay" at present as I did immediately following both my marriages. The beauty of being bisexual is that I can go gay and feel gay when I'm with a man and I can go hetero and feel hetero when I'm with a woman and I can feel both hetero and gay in mixed 3somes and groups
I think Annika has it right. For me the sexual component is very important in a relationship and I'm guessing at my age I would not find that in a relationship with a woman. Therefore I'd look for a relationship with a guy. However if I were to find myself developing a relationship with a woman, it would have to be with the understanding that it would not be monogamous.Originally Posted by Annika L
I agree with Annika. You can not go "gay" if you are bisexual. You may decide to be in a monogamous relationship with one gender or the other. If it is same gender, you are not gay or gone gay. You will still be dealing with your attraction to opposite gender. That attraction (physical and or emotional) will still be there inside you. You will remain fluid in your attraction and the intensity may be fluid as well.
I tend to take the position that monogamy is not good for bisexuals but if you want to be monogamous you still are bisexual.
I am in a life long loving relationship with my woman, and have experienced, on a limited level, bisexual sex before her and a couple times furring our relationship. But if for some reason I was to find my self single again, I would want to try a more intimate sexual relationship with a man because I think the sex would be much better than just random hook ups.
If I were to break up with my girlfriend I would like to have the experience of living with a man. I would still be interested in having sex with women, like having occasional sex with men like I do now.
No, I love tits and pussy too much.
Sure. I am happily married and greatly the enjoy the aex life we have. If on my own and I developed a close relationship we a man I would consider being exclusively gay.
If someone's bisexual they will never become or "go gay/lesbian" if they're married or in a partnership with someone of the same sex, anymore than having a partner or marrying someone of the opposite sex would make them "hetero/straight". My husband and I are bisexual men and we are monogamous, and we're not the only bisexual men who are in a relationship like this.
I am not currently "involved" in any formal way with either a male or female---I always do hope that at some point--I can find someone that I like, that he or she really likes me both as a friend, sex partner, lover and I feel the same about him or her with there being more to our "thing" than "just sex."
At this point in my life---as much as I do want to once again find someone for such a relationship----I do require more than the sex and seek someone that we share a degree of mutual like, love and compatibility---no matter their gender.
So---if I do get so blessed to once again find such a person--it has been a long time since I have found such a person of either gender---I have just had a series of relationships with both that were more based on sex than other factors--which for what those "things" were--that was fine at the time. It would be kind of nice to just find someone to be able to do more than just have sex with, someone to talk to, hug, love and have great sex, go to the beach, movies, dinner and just "hang" and chill out with.
No matter the gender of the person I would have such a relationship with----at this point I would hope that with whomever I might have such a relationship--that would effectively be my final one and we have such a mutual degree of caring, love, friendship, etc--for and between one another--that we would be together for as long as our health holds out and we remain on this earth---but should that relationship end by either us parting company and going our separate ways--or the other is the one who passes--when and if it came time that I found another person to have such a relationship in the future---no matter the gender of my partner in the first one---it would not matter the gender of the person in such a potential future relationship as well.
No matter how it would fall in both cases---I would not want to be restricted to being considered either gay or straight---I am bisexual in a very true sense because it makes no never mind the gender of any potential partners--sexually, romantic and otherwise--I just want someone who I care for and he or she cares for me and we love and like one another and we are there for each other not only on the good days, but the bad ones as well, irrespective of the gender of those person or persons.
I do so wish that we could get beyond that concept that things have to be "Either/Or" when it comes to whom we have sex and or relationships with. That is really outdated as far as I am concerned.
When it comes to sex, I want it all. Big breasts are too of a turn-on to be ignored. Like big cocks. I enjoy being bi-sexual. It really is the best of both worlds.
If my marriage ended. I would look for a bisexual woman that is ok with me being a shaved bisexual bottom. We would have an open relationship. If either of us wanted a live in lover that would be fine.
I have been in a male-male relationship for more that 10 years. If something happened to him. I would seek another male-male relationship because I am much more homosexual than heterosexual. But, that does not rule out the possibility of a relationship with a woman. Even now, there is one woman I know that I like very much and have felt that way about her for more than 20 years. Also, I gravitate toward mostly exclusive relationships because I find it less satisfying to have a relationship with more than one person at a time. However, I don't demand total exclusivity, I like (and would seek) partners that have fulfilling lives independent of me and accept that I have a very fulfilling life independent of them. I like relationships that add value to our lives rather than add significant limits on them.
JEM
God forbid something should ever happen, I'd definitely be open to a committed gay or queer relationship. I have a very supportive spouse but if I were alone for some reason, I'd probably put more effort into a gay relationship. For now though, she encourages me to date and find others like me for adult play. Best of both world.
…I would continue having relationships with girls…but since I’m bi…I would also continue to suck cocks on the side…
If for any reason I had to start over, I can't possibly say if I'd end up with a guy or a girl. I can say it would not be a monogamous relationship (the 36 years I spent as monogamous cured me of that, happily my wife and I have finally worked all that out!) and I would enjoy sex with all genders. I am definitely bi/pan, not hetero or homo, sexual and I definitely will keep all lanes open as long as I have an interest in sex! I'll stay with the one (or ones) I love, but I'll play with anyone I like enough to get naked with.
Well said Jem, well said
I'd have to agree with the majority. If I was to loose my current relationship I'd need relationship that allows me to explore no mater man or woman. I'm currently in a monogamous relationship and it's not working to well for me.
I'm with George51. I love women too much to be gay and enjoy playing with a nice hard cock too much to deny being bi.
I realize that for some bisexuals, serial monogamy with both men and women is possible. But I don't think it is possible for me. I can neither go straight nor gay.
Despite my strong wish and decision to seek sexual, FWB, or even romantic relationships with only men (in other words, to go totally gay) after breaking up with my girlfriend of three years in December 2019, I've come to realize that my attraction to women will never fade. There I was, on a date with a guy I had romantic feelings for, and very strong sexual attraction to, out on the dance floor with him at a straight club, when a deep attraction to the gorgeous woman dancing next to me still arose. Damn-it, yes, I am bisexual! I have desire for both men and women. But it's a bigger issue than this.
My rocky relationship with this last girlfriend (only girlfriend since my gay desires surfaced 30 years ago) definitely proved to me that I cannot go without having sex with men: because I didn't let myself act on my urges, my gay desires forever increased in that relationship and almost drove me insane. Near the end, while fucking her, I had to imagine that I was fucking a man in order to cum. I suspect the same may be true with my heterosexual desires. Even though I haven't come to that place yet, as an earlier poster mentioned, I have to ask myself, if I were in a monogamous, romantic relationship with a man, and it wasn't going well, would my straight desires begin to overwhelm me, and after I broke up with him, would I be seeking some kind of relationship with a woman again, forever the yo-yo?
I suspect because of this possibility, and as an earlier poster also said, I don't think a serious, monogamous relationship is for me anymore, whether it is with a man or a woman. Unfortunately what that means for me, because I'm not into cheating or open relationships (I believe there is some suffering in both, despite strong denial by some), is for me at best to just have FWBs for the rest of my life, or even just casual sex with men and women--or maybe just men, since my gay desires greatly outweigh my straight ones. For that reason, part of me is actually sorry that I'm bisexual. I love the intimacy that romantic love brings, but it doesn't seem to be enough for my crazy, uncontrolled, horny, lust-filled mind for both cock, male ass, and pussy.
Of course I would be open to raising and spreading my legs for a guy in a gay relationship . I have come to love gay sex entirely .
Both my wife and I are totally Bi sexual., We often share our experiences with others we have been with. No-one loves pussy like I do and no one loves cock like she does but the naughty side of us likes to play with others of the same sex. So it doesn't matter if you have a pussy or cock, I will play.
I was going to say no...until I saw THAT! And I'm not even a "top". LolOf course I would be open to raising and spreading my legs for a guy in a gay relationship . I have come to love gay sex entirely .
I don't think I could ever "go gay", at least for any extended period of time. I love women and pussy too much to give that up. I have never experienced any feelings of affection toward men as I do women and my physical attraction to males is pretty much confined to the "reproductive apparatus"! That said, I've often wondered what it might have been like to carve out a few months to be exclusive with one guy, relax my pre-conceived notions and inhibitions and just see what it was like.
I'm re-married to a gal now, so that's unlikely to ever happen now. After my first marriage ended, I went "straight" to dating other women until I met my current wife. I didn't even meet up with any guys during that time and I kind of regret having missed that opportunity to really scratch my bi itch. But the fact is that it wasn't itching so bad then. I did chat with a few guys but nothing ever happened. I remember one dude was similar to me, divorced I think, who said he was interested in trying out an exclusive male-male relationship for a limited period of time just to see what it was like. He was more of a dominant top type which would have complimented my submissive preferences with guys. I recall we tentatively arranged to meet but I never went through with it and didn't give it much thought at the time. The strange thing is that, now, I occasionally think back to that and imagine what it might have been like, masturbating to the fantasy of an intensely erotic affair. The fantasy never rises to the level of "romance", but in my mind it is highly passionate at least. But, only in my mind is where it must remain. I think had I done that, I would still have gone back to relationships only with women, but it would have been a fulfilling experience to look back on rather than wonder about it.
So, my advice to anyone like me, who is on the left side of the Kinsey Scale and has the opportunity, would be to at least go "a little gayer" for a stint just to find out!
Last edited by BeauKnerr; Jan 24, 2023 at 10:46 AM.
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