Hi!!
Title says it all... any advice or similar experiences?
I definitely will not do anything to hurt my partner and am just curious about others' experiences and advice.
First time posting and thank you!!
Hi!!
Title says it all... any advice or similar experiences?
I definitely will not do anything to hurt my partner and am just curious about others' experiences and advice.
First time posting and thank you!!
jhm1957,
Well 1st thing to consider is this. If you start on the bisexual journey you will never be able to turn back as it opens so many "new" doors to our sexuality, that I wish I had the courage to open in my 20's. Although I'm not in to aggressive types, a calm and laidback guy, with lots of passion when we play is soooo exciting, and having fun together makes me moan like some sort of wounded animal. Although my MFM experiences clearly showed that the ladies LOVE seeing us guys play together, sharing these feelings with a spouse could be problematic. When found out, my x-GF became very upset and it led to our relationship's ultimate demise. Maybe testing the waters by viewing some bi porn together may be a start so you can get a feel for what she thinks of the idea. Good luck....Greg
Your biggest problem will be finding someone who does have any real intentions of meeting soemone! Way too many guys on these sites or apps who just like to chat only when they get horny and then they are GONE!Originally Posted by jhm1957
I have been with my wife for 32 years, about 8 years ago I told her I thought I was bi. At first she tried to ignore it, but as I started to explore anal play she came around to the idea. She has now gotten into anal sex, I love fucking her ass, and she even puts a strapon on and fucks me. No sex with anyone else yet but I'm still hoping.
You’re not alone. My last m/m experience was 25 years ago. I’ve been happily married fo 30 years and don’t want to do anything to screw it up. My wife is gorgeous and we have a great sex life but m/m or f/f is a total turn off for her. I told her one night to put her dildo in my ass and she did. I thought she would open up to it but after we were finished she said she didn’t want to do that anymore. When I told her I enjoyed it she said didn’t mind me doing it but she didn’t want to know about it. I’m still faithful to her and hoping she warms up to it. For me it’s not worth the chance of losing everything for a chance of an encounter. I think you will find a lot of members in the same boat.
I would say explore your sexuality at your own pace.
The other thing is, if you don't explore, you may look back years later with regret in not doing so.
If it is to be, let it be with me
Your a lucky guy, wish my wife would fuck me. Still want to experience the real thing.
Sure. Strive to be an ethical slut and a good man.
Be honest with yourself, then with your partner. No secrets, no lies.
Having the support and encouragement of your partner makes all the difference in the world.
I’ve always been with a woman but in my late teens and early twenties I had a childhood friend that I carried on with through out all my relationships back then. I was never that serious with the women as far as a lasting relationship. It was just like we were just having fun.
Was in the same situation as you but my gf shared a fantasy with me one night having sex. She put on a woman sucking 2 cocks at once. Then the guy bent done to help her suck the other guy. I wasn't into but fucked her silly watching and of course cam because it turned her on so much. After that, I shared my fantasy of tranny porn. She was stand off'ish but came around. I'm now openly bisexual and she loves tranny porn. She loves that she brought out my bisexual side and we both can't wait for our first biMMF. I recently sucked my first cock, without her, and told her about the experience. She was loving it. Can't wait to suck another. Yes she perfectly fine with me having sex with men while I'm away. Fuck I love her.
Last edited by Into_A_Lot37; Dec 16, 2019 at 11:58 AM.
Speaking only personally, I feel my relationships with women actually improved a lot when I opened and embraced my bisexual desires more fully and honestly with other men. I feel more present and available to women and a better lover overall.
Oh my, there are so many men out there who feel just as you do. In the years I've been around the internet I suppose I've seen literally thousands plus who love their partners but want to be able to share openly with another guy. I would approach this delicately to say the least. You have something special and I say hang on to it so move cautiously.
Some women are really open to male bisexuality while others are disgusted by it so you have to feel it out and get her perspective about it somehow.
I hope you can and I hope you get to enjoy both worlds soon.
This so much. Also being open with your partner may not lead to being able to practice your sexuality but you will also not be constantly hiding it from them.
Hi all and thank you for the feedback. Looks like there is a lot of experience here both good and bad.
I want to be open with my partner about my desires but I am afraid of the possible negative effects it will have. I'm also afraid of not doing it because I will invariably end up with the same regrets many of you expressed.
What are some subtle ways I could gauge her reaction without letting the cat out of the bag?
Thank you all again!
I would start by trying to watch so TV shows that have LGBTQ individuals or story line like Will and Grace. Start tracking LGBTQ rights and legislation in the news See how she responds if it positive then add positive comment to a normal conversation and go from there. it could take week if not months. don't try to do it all at once or you might let the cat out of the bag.Hi all and thank you for the feedback. Looks like there is a lot of experience here both good and bad.
I want to be open with my partner about my desires but I am afraid of the possible negative effects it will have. I'm also afraid of not doing it because I will invariably end up with the same regrets many of you expressed.
What are some subtle ways I could gauge her reaction without letting the cat out of the bag?
Thank you all again!
Does she have a kinkier side? You could try asking for a threesome, a MFF one and then to meet her needs, a MMF one?
My advise - be yourself and nevermind. It seems many people have very strong emotions when it comes to sex, and not just the act of sex, but sexual behaviors in general. Even those who think they can have a casual sexual encounter or relationship may feel very different once they've actually done so.
Nothing really subtle will get a point across. While watching TV shows (Netflix, Grace & Frankie anyone) can open a conversation about LGBT issues, few are related to Mixed Orientation Marriages (MOM's) and the special circumstances surrounding such a coming out and the relationship...I want to be open with my partner about my desires but I am afraid of the possible negative effects it will have. I'm also afraid of not doing it because I will invariably end up with the same regrets many of you expressed.
What are some subtle ways I could gauge her reaction without letting the cat out of the bag?
Thank you all again!
There are support groups, specific to MOM's, which can help you come out, and help her work through the new information. I suggest checking out some of these if you are serious about coming out to her. I have been involved with such groups for about 10 years. I have heard horror stories and success stories from both sides of these relationships.
So, being honest will be key for working towards what gets called a 'new normal'.
Once you use the available TV shows and such to recognize if she has *any* level of acceptance for the general idea, take a look at how to have difficult conversations -- communication is always a major hurdle when we start talking more openly about the historically taboo subject of sex and orientation. I like a method from a sex educator and relationship coach: http://reidaboutsex.com/difficult-conversation-formula/
If you are interested in other MOM resources, check out http://alternatepaths.net/
If you have a good relationship, try simple honesty.What are some subtle ways I could gauge her reaction without letting the cat out of the bag? Thank you all again!
You have discovered that you are curious. No more or less.
And you love her too much to keep secrets from her.
That’s how couples fuck up.
This also gives her permission to share HER curiosities. Be prepared.
Maybe your mutual curiosities overlap. Or not.
Many women fantasize about being with two guys, or playing with a woman, or seeing two men together, or taking a BBC, etc. Stuff that can really happen.
I am openly bi, very happily married, we play with a few friends.
It works because we avoid secrets or dishonesty. We share.
And we seem to be the happiest couple I know.
Been Bi from a very early age. I always kept my relationships separate and I’m 72 now and no one ever discovered I was Bi.
Very useful.
Been Bi from a very early age. I always kept my relationships separate and I’m 72 now and no one ever discovered I was Bi.
Very sensible advice! It may not work in every situation, but has in my relationship with my wife of 48 years. It's only been the past 10 or so that I've considered myself to be bisexual, but we both acknowledge and accept it. She also knows of my feminine aspirations in crossdressing and assuming the woman's role in intimate activities with other men & gurls.
Honesty has worked for me/us.
I live through all of you and your stories, I told my wife a couple years ago about being curious and it has never been mentioned again, I always hope that a chance to mention it again will present itself again but so far it hasn't, we experimented with swinging a few years ago and that ended kind of sour, when we had our straight mfm 3 ways that went ok but the one time we swapped with a couple that didn't go so well and it's kind of a sore spot. If she ever brings up the topic of mmf 3 ways again that will be my moment.
I guess I must fall into the "lucky" category. My wife and I got into the "Swing Lifestyle" back in our late thirty's. Eventually we drifted over to the Bi Lifestyle, that was a long time ago. As time went by and certain Female problems started to appear, she lost all interest in having any part of the lifestyle we led. But to this day, she doesn't have any problems with me having sex with other guys, as long as I follow the rules.
My girlfriend left me after she found out I was bi, but we stayed friends.
Same story,man. Unfortunately, in my case, my girlfriend did not show tolerance of understanding. We've been dating for about 2 years. And it's only recently that I've come to realize that I'm just as attracted to guys as I am to her. We were used to telling each other the truth, but she didn't like the truth. We broke up 3 weeks after my coming out. On some level, I understand her because she wants a completely heterosexual relationship, and I respect that. After reading a few articles here https://breakupangels.com/stay-friends-after-divorce/, we remained friends after we broke up. Yes, at first I was sad, but I must continue to live on.
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