We’re you ever molested by an older person when you were young and surprised that you really liked it and wanted more? Do you think that first early contact made you bisexual?
We’re you ever molested by an older person when you were young and surprised that you really liked it and wanted more? Do you think that first early contact made you bisexual?
a good question...
fyi i was not.
The replies will be interesting.
My answer is no.
no not at all
My answer is a definite 'No' to both parts, and I didn't feel or recognize my bisexuality at all until rather late in life.
I am, however, preparing to meet a guy whose history is just that. Says he was a young teen when he was molested by a couple of older guys who owed a grocery store in his neighborhood. When I suggested to him that these guys should have been punished, he admitted that he grew to like it and would go back for more after the grocery store closed.
Here's a partial quote: 'Yes I believe that’s where my interest and desire comes from. I would get a mild spanking from one of them while the other watched and rubbed his cock. As I was bending over the table getting a red butt, a well lubed finger always found its way up my back door. Well, one cock went in front of me and they taught me how to suck it. Sometime I just pleased one and sometimes i had to suck two or get a harder spanking with a paddle.'
He says that he hasn't sucked a cock since those days ended, but that he's ready to experiment again.
Yes, it is an interesting topic, not always pleasant, depending on point of view. The first question, yes, I was molested by three older men when I was young. The first two were my grand father and my uncle. I was 4-5 years old, and really did not understand totally what was going on. Thinking about it when I was much older, I figured my grand father had probably been playing with me at very, very early ages. My uncle was a one time thing.
Then later on, when I was roughly 8-9, I had a paper route, and one of my customers was an old guy, probably in his very late 60’s. I recall very well a day when I was delivering his paper, I always put his paper in the door. As I came up to the door he was sitting in his chair that faced the door. The main door was open, just the screen door, and as I walked up to put the paper in the door, I looked, he was sitting in his chair with his pants off rubbing his cock. I just froze, could not move. He got up quickly and came to the door, opened it quickly and pulled me inside. I couldn’t yell, run, do anything. He closed the door behind us, and told me he would tell my father and mother if I told on him. I lived in a very small town, the thought of it all scared me to death!
He had hold of my arm my arm and pulled me to his chair. He sat down and continued to masturbate himself while holding me in place. Then he told me to “kiss” his cock and he directed my head down to him. He held me firmly there, and told me to suck him like a lollipop. I tried to pull away a few times, but his grasp was too much. I was a small, skinny kid, and he could do whatever he wanted. As he pushed my head down on him, he more or less humped my face and soon came on me. It was disgusting and no, I did not enjoy it at all, it terrified me. He quickly wiped me up, and told me to leave, and that if I told, he would get me. At that age, it was simply scary, terrifying, and scarring. I had that route until I was 16, and I hated him.
At about age 11, my best friends older brother also would have me spend the night on occasion. We were pretty good friends, and so we all played together, rode bikes, all that kid stuff. The older brother had me over one night for a sleep over. We were on the couch watching TV late into the night, his parents had long gone to bed. While we were laying there, he kind of started fooling around with himself under his pajamas. He asked me if I wanted to “hook dicks”, that one of his other good friends would do it with him and it felt good. I was very wary, and apprehensive about it, but we did. He played with me and I just let it happen. This type of thing went on for a couple of months when I would stay over, and while I thought it was odd, also thought it was just the type of thing kids did, which I always thought odd, especially after what I had gone through with the old man. Yet, this was different, it was with my buddy, my friend, not some nasty old man. Strange how your mind thinks at younger ages.
This behavior continued, and soon graduated to not just rubbing each other’s cocks, but soon to sucking each other, although I was the one that was kind of gently forced or coaxed into doing most of the sucking. This also branched to his friend, as sometimes we would have a few of us sleep over. Not long after, it including them fucking me, I pretty much became their little user-boy. At first it scared me, and made me feel very uneasy. I guess in time though, I learned to like it, to go with the flow, as usually, I too, got some attention, and would get to cum on occasion too. Yes, I feared getting caught, yes, at times I was confused still, it all did not make a lot of sense, but I learned to just enjoy it. It was expected of me.
All that ended probably when when I was around 14-15, when he moved. The sad part about all of it is that I was just one very confused young guy. I was supposed to like girls, I was supposed to date them, to have fun with them. Yes, I thought girls were cute, and I wanted to be normal. While I didn’t think guys were cute or hot or anything else-still don’t for that matter-my sexual boundaries had been compromised in many ways. It alters how you think, how you feel, and just flat out confused me to no end. I had trouble with relationships with girls I tried to date, it was confusing what to do. Needless to say, I didn’t have many girlfriends growing up, and really just kept to myself.
i really wouldn’t date until I was in my late 20’s, and I still didn’t know how to be with a girl, yet I had sex with a couple of them by then. Since then, I have been married a couple of times, with not real good results, and in between one divorce, I did get with a couple of guys and enjoyed it from a sexual experience, and also mainly because it was something I allowed to happen, not being pressured or really, raped. It was my choice. From that perspective, I found sex with a guy to be enjoyable. Yet, I still do not find men attractive to me, and I do not feel as if I could have a relationship with one as a “couple” or marriage etc. It is more sexual for me with a guy. I still love woman though, find them very attractive, and love a woman’s body and their girly ways.
As as I have gotten older, I have been able to shed labels for myself. I grew up wondering if I was gay, was I this or that. In the end, I think I am just a sexual being, and I do not need to label myself, or anyone else for that matter! Yes, I do think my early experiences did mould me, they changed who I am to some degree, they definitely took any sexual boundary I might have had for myself growing up away. Do I think it has made me bisexual? Or altered who I might have become? Really, that could be the question for many of us I suppose, about like how long is a piece of string. These days, I just try to focus on what is good in my life, and try to just treat others with respect and how I would like to be treated. It doesn’t matter now how I feel from a sexual perspective so much anymore. I went through a lot of anger, and sometimes still do. But, I continue to strive to move past those ugly things of my past. This is just me, and how I feel. Obviously, we all have our own story to tell, and our own demons to vanquish or leave lay. How we deal with things are very individualistic. One day at a time is my motto.
Sorry this was wordy, but there you go. Happy New Year to all, may it be better than the last! Greenie
[QUOTE=Borntosuckcock;321953]WeÂ’re you ever molested by an older person when you were young and surprised that you really liked it and wanted more? Do you think that first early contact made you bisexual?[/QUOTE.
I am not going to say that I was molested but yes an older person did start things off for me.. my cousin 3 years older than me started things by beating off in front of me and that led to him touching me and then me him.. he stroked me then me him.. that led to sucking and soon I was sucking him all the time.. then on sleep overs we slept naked to gather.. we would stroke each other and I would suck him.. then we would cuddle up naked and go to sleep.. one night when I was like 14 after I had sucked on him a while he rolled me over on my stomach and rubbed oil all over my ass and in my crack finding my hole.. he rubbed it a lot.. then he got on top of me and speed my cheeks and put his cock in my crack and humps me no penitration just bumping.. I remember I liked it.. that was also the first time he kissed me.. he got so excited he shot cum all over my ass.. we continued doing this for about 2 months until one night he had snuck in my bedroom window and was humping me that he lined things up and pushed the head of his dick inside of me.. I donÂ’t remember any pain just that it was different.. he then pushed all the way in me.. I remember that I was kinda confused but liked it.. then he started fucking me.. slow at first but faster and faster and deeper soon after that.. soon I was pushing back and driving him deeper in to me.. I started moaning and begging him keep going.. he rode me for what seemed like a good while.. then he pulled out and cum all over my ass and back.. I had never seen that much cum.. he fucked me regular for the next 3 years.. yes I loved it even craved it.. yes it changed me.. I still love cock!! DonÂ’t get me wrong.. I am romantically attracted to women.. but sexually attracted to men.. I still today look back fondly to those days.. and am glad he showed me the way!!
A very frank and inciteful comment, Greenie....and one to which I can relate. I was also molested at about age 6. It was an older boy at my school and no, I certainly did not enjoy it. I felt guilt that I didn't resist harder, dirty for the things I'd been made to do...and far too ashamed to ever speak of it to anyone. Like in your case however, a later encounter with another boy...this time consensual... showed me that it didn't have to be like that. I realized that it wasn't always about somebody bigger taking what they wanted...that it could be a comforting, playful, trusting sort of thing. I guess that stuck in the back of my mind as I grew and once I began having sexual fantasies and masturbating frequently I would sometimes remember that second boy and use the memory to get off.
That left me feeling a bit of guilt but really hardly more than what I felt when I'd jerk off thinking about girls. What REALLY confused and scared me was when I began to think about that first boy...in somewhat the same way. I'd imagine running into him at the skating rink next door to the school and cornering him in the men's room. There I wouldn't exact revenge for my earlier torment...though not in the manner you might expect. No, I'd approach him and say "Remember me?...well THIS should jog your memory!" at which point I'd reach for his crotch and massage his dick through his pants. Certain that he wouldn't object now, I'd drop to my knees, unzip him and start to blow him. Between sucks I'd say "This is what you made me. This is who I am now. Happy with your handiwork?"
I don't know if I thought that would make him feel remorse for what he'd done previously but in my mind it was retribution of a sort. THAT was a very confusing thing..and as I said, frightening. I'd jerk off thinking about that and after cumming I'd be honestly questioning my own sanity! It took a very long time and a lot of experiences to give me the emotional distance to make sense of it. My first marriage failed due in large part to my still unresolved feelings about my sexuality. All during the long slow decline, I had occasion to explore my same sex urges...usually with unsatisfying results.
A couple of nights spent with a bi couple in which he, she and I all enjoyed each other equally was a foretaste of what awaited me once I met my current lady. She's an artist..and French and while it may be a cliche...characteristically open minded! She introduced me to her circle of FWBs and before long I was a full fledged member of this polyamorous little group. It was a boyfriend of hers that took my anal cherry...on my 47th birthday, no less!
Meeting my spouse was the catalyst I needed to finally resolve all the conflicting emotions I'd had growing up, though that too didn't occur overnight. I was still puzzled over those earlier fantasies of my childhood tormentor. After a lot of reading and meeting and talking with people who shared their stories, I've gotten the idea that the mind is a very resilient thing with many mechanisms for protecting itself. Just as we initially feel shame for an act perpetrated against us, as if the action were of our choosing....we will later indulge in the same acts and thus "own" the act itself. Nothing that is OF us can harm us and so the memory of abuse is made less painful. That is...or so I believe..why those who are abused often become abusers in later life. The fact that I relive some of the same things FORCED upon me as a child but now only with consenting partners because I had the experience of doing so consentually with the second boy...is what kept me from becoming an abuser.
So in answer to the question "Did it make me bi?" I'd have to say it opened a door, but that I only "became'' bi when I finally embraced my urges. As with our taste in music, food, sports, hobbies and so on...anything we're exposed to in childhood goes toward shaping who we ultimately become. It's up to us to do so conscientiously and with compassion toward those we play with. Congratulations Greenie for doing just that.
I was 18 but my 1st male partner was in his 40s. Does that count?
Thank you stonebow, your post is quite interesting, and I feel much of what was said, spot on. Yes, we are quite resilient in many ways, and while I still have my moments, and maybe all will never be totally resolved in my mind, how we deal and cope certainly has a lot to do with healing and moving on in a positive way. Thanks for your post!
i had a married bisexual friend who was sexually abused by his uncle and his friends from the time he was 12 years old so years later after he got married would having sex with her daddy and brothers
Yes and no, I did not enjoy an older trusted adult grabbing me by the ears and fucking my mouth until he popped off it it. He made me puke because he was so far into my throat, made me clean it up and told me he would tell my parents I initiated it if I told. I was 10 he was 30 something. I never again had ANY contact or inclination towards guys until I was in my 30's. I got asked to take a guy home from a pool party that I knew of in my circle of friends. He got too drunk to drive and the host asked me to give him a lift. He make a move and grabbed my cock while I was driving up his driveway in a dangerous hillside area. I was going to kick his ass when I got the car stopped, he got his face heading towards my crotch. He had his hand up the workout shorts I was wearing and realized I got hard from his hand. In a split second decision I thought what the hell, I was horny and leaned the seat back when we stopped. He sucked me, played with my balls and ass with his hand without penetrating me but it was good. I had nothing but bad memories about the one cock in my mouth, but have never allowed a woman to go down on me without being willing to reciprocate. As I was getting closer to cumming decided I was going to have to suck him and if he let me cum in his mouth I was going to have to do the same. In a few minutes I went from something so far from my mind for 20+ years to cold reality. I blew the mother of all loads in his mouth, he swallowed it all. I took a deep breath, resigned my fate and decided I would make the best of it and started moving towards him and got my hand on his shorts. He said no thanks, went in the house and left me wondering. I got married, divorced without another event but after my divorce had a best friends with benefits develop that lasted a year until he moved. No it did not make me bisexual, far from it, I was completely turned off by it. I have made peace with the situation and my being bisexual has really nothing to do with the incident which was traumatic and not enjoyable. I do enjoy a one on one situation with a single guy and would love to duplicate it.
Yes and I always wondered how it would feel to be 100% straight.Originally Posted by Borntosuckcock
Living in NYC, in the summer, using the roof as a tar beach was common. I was 12 y.o. and already 5' 9" sun bathing on a blanket and reading when the 22 y.o. super's son came up. After asking if I liked girls he showed me several pics of nude girls. After a few moments, he asked if the pics were making me hard. Indicating that I was, he said let me check, and he started rubbing my hardening cock thru my swimming trunks. As it felt good and I wanted to still look at the tits and pussys, I let him continue. It didn't take him long to move his hand up under the short's leg and stroke my now very hard 7" cock. It felt amazing to havde someone else's hand and I just laid back and enjoyed. Not realizing that within moments, my cock would be fully out in the sun. I watched his face light up in delight. Especially as he lowered his head and licked the tip. He quickly sucked the shaft into his hungry mouth. It took him only a minute or two to make me explode and suck my cum down his throat. Over the following 2 years, till he moved, i enjoyed his talented toungue and mouth several more times.
I had one tryed but was run off
I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it!
Oh dear Greenie. It feels like you could use a hug.
Have you tried to seek professional help. It does seem like you did a great job in managing the "baggage" of your past.
The one thing I notice is that you talk about anger. Do you still feel angry?
Have a great new and happy new year.
DM
No, but I was sexually abused by my Mother. last time I was around 12 years old. I consider myself as Bisexual, and my preference is Men older to me (I'm 58)
I have a lot of trouble considering that past traumatic experience same sex experience "made" someone gay or bi. I think there needs to be a clear delineation line on what is acceptable and what is not acceptable.
An older man, forcing a young boy to suck his dick and threatening to tell his parents is simply not OK.
Now, the gray zones.
A 12 year old boy and a 16 year old experimenting at playing "doctor". That could just be simple experimentation.
It is so hard to judge, specifically when both parties are willing but have a greater than 7 years difference.
The questions is, would such an experience have "made" someone more attracted to men?
Respectfully, I don't think so.
Most of us fall somewhere in between 100% gay and 100% straight (use the kinsey scale 0-6).
many studies have been done. One clear fiding is that, there is less social stigma on gay or bisexual relationships, especially among Millenials.
no I was no
kevin , could you give us the whole story of your mom. it seems that you are not alone. i have talked with several men who seemed to enjoy it
DareMe, yes, I have gone to counseling several times, some it was during my divorce, and also it touched on many aspects of just me, this included my abuse. In the end, it really didn’t help much, more stirred things up.
I do still have some anger, but it is probably more due to my own parents naive ways about things when I was younger, and also always feeling like I could not speak frankly to them about anything. Part was because my father was a minister, and it just was an awkward situation always. It is a long story, and I won’t go into it all here, but there you go.
As a whole, I feel like I do pretty well with things, but sure, once one has gone through these things, at times it does make you wonder just how you might have been without the abuse. And that too is something I could talk for hours on and how I feel it might have affected me. Do I think it made me bisexual-or as I do not particularly like those labels, given me more interest in MM sexuality, no, not really, but do I know that for a fact? No, never will. But I must embrace me and who I am, and that is okay!
The difficult part part is being married to a wonderful woman, and while she understands where I have been and all the ugly details of it, she also realizes that it could be easier for me to stray or have those desires, and that isn’t easy or maybe fair for her either. It is tough at times, and we have had conversations over it, there just isn’t a clear cut answer to any of it.
Thanks for your comments, I appreciate it!
I was never molested by an older man.
If I had been molested, it would have reduced the effect of the socialization I was immersed in to be straight.
I would likely be gay now rather than bisexual.
JEM
I hate to say this, but I think we are all "Damaged goods" in some way.
No, I have never been molested by anyone of any age and truly have empathy for their feelings. But I take offense at being labelled "damaged goods". I have lived a good life, contributed to society, paid taxes, stayed out of jail, raised healthy and good kids and support my family. I also dearly love going to bed with men as well as women - it harms no one. I'm happy and healthy.I hate to say this, but I think we are all "Damaged goods" in some way.
Hear! Hear!!
This exactly describes me, and, I hope, many others on this forum! We are good people and we like what we like. Couldn't change it if I wanted to!
Nothing wrong with being damaged goods.
Yes, some of the damage lasts a lifetime.
However, suffering damage builds character and has the potential to make you/me a better person.
I think I have weathered the damage well and have had a happy and very productive life.
I am certain damage suffered by me has made me a better person as well as being bisexual.
JEM
i was not
I usually molested my uncles, granddad, dad, cousins, strangers, friends of the above-mentioned, and anyone else who wanted me to play with them..... and loved every minute of it!
That was my experience, I was always the aggressor. At 8 or9, I knew I wanted to suck cocks of older men that I’d see at the public swimming pool showers.
I was 11 and he was 14. And the next year was me sucking his dick a couple of times a week.
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