Originally Posted by
Franz007
Hi there
I am thinking a lot about my bisexuality these days. I am one of these guys who can crave and enjoy homosexual sex very much (in a gay-bathroom for example) but don't feel any attraction to men in everyday's life.
I feel extremely attracted to women and/or am looking at them very much. But sometimes it seems confusing if i want to have Sex with those girls or if i am not just extremely jealous of them, wanting to look like them and to be them. This happen when i see very feminine girls/women who wear sexy clothes.
I would not want to be a woman in my normal life but when i'm having Sex with men i really feel entirely like a woman. I did not crossdress yet because it's too much effort and energy. But i can really feel that during Sex with a man i behave and feel very feminine. And i am only a bottom (would never want to fuck actively a guy but love the sensation of being fucked when it's done with passion and i am threated like a submissive "girl" but without brutality, more like beetween a man and woman).
Sometimes i am watching videos of girlfriends who cheat on their boyfriends and record it. I am extremely turned on by those videos but can feel that in such moments i am much more dreaming about being them and be a slut myself much more than wanting to fuck them. I had the same when i started watching pornography 25 years ago. I was extremely attracted to the girl's cute faces but at the same time fantasized more about it would be me pleasing the guy.
I know that for most real gay men there is no feminity and they dont feel attracted to feminity. That's absolutely not my case. That's why i am asking myslf about how homosexual i really am.
I was surprised to find barely nothing in the Internet about the psychology of guys like me (where their homosexuality reflects their own feminity or is triggered by a feminine image of themselves).
I am a guy that is not very masculine (without beeing especially feminine) but i am very slim, like to shave myslf, sometimes even the legs. I am very sensitive and envy girls not only for their sexuality but also for wearing sexy clothes like miniskirts etc.
At the same time i need girlfriends to feel emotionally well and loved. And i have also sexual needs to fuck them actively and can enjoy it very much but these needs are quite low. Just from time to time. I think that i have more needs to have Sex with a penis and being penetrated because it fits better to the feminine image i'm having about myself during sex.
So i would be really happy if some of you guys have similar experiences about the way they experience their homosexual part without being necesserely a transgender and feeling like that in their "normal" life.
I guess the main trigger is that i would want to feel desired like sexy girls are being desired by men, so it looks like psychological issues more than real identity?
For example: when i can feel that a guy is desiring me i completely melt and have a huge attraction to offer myself to him. So wanting to have sex with men only appears if i can feel the guy wanting me. In general i'm having stronger orgasms during sex with men than with women. Otherwise (as mentioned) i never experienced any kind of attraction to men in everyday's life.
If you find interesting artciles about guys like me i would be very interested. I hope i am not the only one like that....
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