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  1. #1
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    Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family know?

    I donít tell anybody about my attraction to guys, no one knows about it, I keep it completely to myself. I am a little bit ashamed, although I personally donít have a problem with it, I know its completely normal and natural but I know there is a lot of ignorant people out there that are close-minded and wouldnít understand it, I canít reveal my attractions to anyone because I will immediately be labeled as a closeted gay or confused, I think society still has a huge problem dealing with sexuality and there is a lot of homophobia out there too.

  2. #2
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    Haven't told my family that I want to suck and fuck a big shemale. They just wouldn't get, my wife in the hand has been fucking me silly since I told her.

  3. #3
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    Of course not. Our family and friends know that my husband and I are bisexual, and they've known this for decades since before we were in a relationship together. Life is meant for living, not hiding in a closet, and despite what people who are deeply closeted think coming out as bisexual is not going to ruin your life, career, and it's not telling people the specifics of your personal sex life.

  4. #4
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    Some of my closest friends know and one of my siblings. I don't tell anyone else because it isn't any of their business. But hide it? No. There's,nothing to hide. Should someone find out, I wouldn't deny it.

  5. #5
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    I hide my attraction. If my family were to find out it would destroy my marriage. My kids would hate me for seeing men. I seek out male partners because they're easier to find. I wouldn't stray if my wife would just put out more.

  6. #6
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    larry i completly agree w/everything u said

  7. #7
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    Only people we play with need to know or those we provide services to.People do not understand it at all.When we used to swing more you had the do gooders that had the boringest sex life and were happy with it because that is what you were supposed to do.We blew the shit out of that mold years ago.We are both much happier for it and still best friends other than man and wife.

  8. #8
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    Well, I feel you LennyC. My family don't know that I'm attracted to both sexes. I'm afraid to tell them as they might disown me

  9. #9
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    Quote Originally Posted by sisboy View Post
    Only people we play with need to know or those we provide services to.People do not understand it at all.When we used to swing more you had the do gooders that had the boringest sex life and were happy with it because that is what you were supposed to do.We blew the shit out of that mold years ago.We are both much happier for it and still best friends other than man and wife.
    We feel exactly the same way. If you are not getting naked with us then you have no need to know.

  10. #10
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    I am out to my friends and family, at long last . I hid it 40 years, which was sooo unhealthy.

  11. #11
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    I hide my attraction to and desire for men from my family and str8 friends. They would be shocked and hurt if they knew about my double life as an outwardly str8 looking, str8 acting guy who is secretly just as interested in and sexually attracted to men as he is to women. I do not ever want to hurt the str8 people I love and who love me. But it won't ever happen unless I fuck up by not being cautious and selective. If I am careless or indiscreet and don't vet potential partners well enough to weed out those who are careless or indiscreet, I deserve to be discovered. Another big reason I love life in the closet is that having my naughty, delicious secret is part of the thrill and excitement for me. It's not taboo for me, but knowing it is thought of as shocking or taboo by millions of John Q and Jane Q Publics also adds to the thrill. It would take much of the excitement and thrill out of it for me if everybody and their cousins knew that I like men as much as I like women. I only advertise and reveal this side of me to the men, women and couples that I chat with online. I must feel that there is a mutual comfort level, mutual desire and mutual attraction before I'll be comfortable in meeting them in real time.

  12. #12
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    My wife knows but no one else does if my friends knew they would flip lol.

  13. #13
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    It's one thing to come out as gay, quite another to come out as bisexual. That term does not register in the mind of people who only see in black and white. Add to that the fact that many of us have no romantic involvement with the guys, just his junk, and see the blank stare. This is one secret best kept.

  14. #14
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    I came out to my wife when I realized my sexuality was a mixture of attractions. It did not go particularly well, as she had the typical reactions of insecurity - "Is he really gay?", "will he leave me for a man?"... There are hundreds if not thousands of stories where bitter spouses divorced because of the inability to share such an important part of one self in today's society.
    We are still married, and working though some other issues with communication, her having an affair with a guy that convinced her I was already cheating, and more of the bi-myths we all face. it's been about 10 years since I came out.
    I have opened up to my gay brother, and he had a bit of gay-stereotypical reaction (Bi now, gay later thought process). I have not opened up to any of my other siblings, children or parents - but my wife has shared some of our challenges with her mother, which makes for some awkward moments, I think.
    I have found comfort in some face to face social groups focused on bisexuality. I have to say, those groups are fantastic for those of us looking for something more than sitting in a closet, alone, wondering how to handle things. Instead, I get out once a month or so just to socialize with both men and women with this one common trait. It has been a lifesaver. I've been in sexuality discussion groups, and found a good deal of other members were also bi-identified. One person from work, straight-poly, is aware of my orientation only because we shared a couple of social meetups where bisexuality became the subject of the conversations. It's good to know I can be open with some people, those with alternative lives.

  15. #15
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    I am bi on the low

  16. #16
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    I am out to my wife and would like to come out to a few select friends but my wife is not ready for that yet.

  17. #17
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    Quote Originally Posted by Hypersexual11 View Post
    It's one thing to come out as gay, quite another to come out as bisexual. That term does not register in the mind of people who only see in black and white. Add to that the fact that many of us have no romantic involvement with the guys, just his junk, and see the blank stare. This is one secret best kept.
    Bingo! Proverbial nail-on-the head!
    FIRE IN THE BELLY

  18. #18
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    Quote Originally Posted by Hypersexual11
    It's one thing to come out as gay, quite another to come out as bisexual. That term does not register in the mind of people who only see in black and white. Add to that the fact that many of us have no romantic involvement with the guys, just his junk, and see the blank stare. This is one secret best kept.
    Quote Originally Posted by pepperjack View Post
    Bingo! Proverbial nail-on-the head!
    This is all the more reason to come out and not hide in a closet about being bisexual.

    FYI, society and people who are not bisexual such as heterosexuals, and gay/lesbian people have known all about bisexuality and know that men can be bisexual, and accepted us for decades.

    It's also utterly absurd to claim that most bisexual men do not want romance or a relationship with men, while gay men do. A lot of bisexual men are fully capable of having romance and relationships with both genders, and wind up partnering and marrying men as my husband and I have done. Bisexual men who claim that they could never have an actual relationship/romance/feelings for a man and who just want a man for his cock or who want a man as a fuck buddy/FWB which is not a real relationship at all, are full of a lot of self-loathing and have a lot of internalized homophobia/biphobia about their sexuality.

    But "men" who are closeted/down low have way too many issues about their sexuality that they're not worth the effort to put up with their BS.

  19. #19
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    Years ago only told my wife I was bi-curious. At first it didn't go well. She slowly came around and started to fuck me silly. Then I been tring for years to get her into a mmf 3 way no go. Now we rarely have sex and she has stop giving me blow jobs. So after all that no one knows but the people I been with

  20. #20
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    I'm inclined to agree with the OP and "It's one thing to come out as gay, quite another to come out as bisexual." Bisexuals are not just gay men who still want pussy.

    I've noticed that men who come from a gay background and decide that they are "bisexual' often have a different perspective than men who come from believing that they are heterosexual to seeing themselves as bisexual. Men with a gay philosophical /cultural background often use terms "out of the closet" "down low".

    Many bisexuals do not believe that who they have sex with gender wise is no one's business unless they are being sexual with them. I think that this is the best attitude for bisexual men. If you want to be a bisexual advocate, you can be that without disclosing your own sexual preferences. The old line about not going around telling strangers that you had a good bowel movement is really none of the stranger's business and most do not want to hear it. Same thing is true about your sexuality and your sexual behaviour.

    If a person feels the need to go around disclosing their sexuality to others that is their choice. No one should put them down for doing this just as no one should put down a bisexual for not going around disclosing their sexuality to people they are not being sexual with.

    On another point about men who only want dick and no emotional intimacy with other men, that is fine for them if it fulfills them. I do wonder if they have not developed their bisexuality fully though? When a man states that he only want pussy and tits and he doesn't want any other involvement with women, some refer to that type of man as immature and a few other not so complimentary words.
    just a thought.

    Last edited by tenni; Dec 28, 2015 at 1:57 AM.

  21. #21
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    Quote Originally Posted by tenni View Post
    I'm inclined to agree with the OP and "It's one thing to come out as gay, quite another to come out as bisexual." Bisexuals are not just gay men who still want pussy.

    I've noticed that men who come from a gay background and decide that they are "bisexual' often have a different perspective than men who come from believing that they are heterosexual to seeing themselves as bisexual. Men with a gay philosophical /cultural background often use terms "out of the closet" "down low".

    Many bisexuals do not believe that who they have sex with gender wise is no one's business unless they are being sexual with them. I think that this is the best attitude for bisexual men. If you want to be a bisexual advocate, you can be that without disclosing your own sexual preferences. The old line about not going around telling strangers that you had a good bowel movement is really none of the stranger's business and most do not want to hear it. Same thing is true about your sexuality and your sexual behaviour.

    If a person feels the need to go around disclosing their sexuality to others that is their choice. No one should put them down for doing this just as no one should put down a bisexual for not going around disclosing their sexuality to people they are not being sexual with.

    On another point about men who only want dick and no emotional intimacy with other men, that is fine for them if it fulfills them. I do wonder if they have not developed their bisexuality fully though? When a man states that he only want pussy and tits and he doesn't want any other involvement with women, some refer to that type of man as immature and a few other not so complimentary words.
    just a thought.

    All I see here are excuses for why you want to stay a deeply closeted hypocritical chickenshit coward about being bisexual.

    Telling people that you're bisexual is not forcing your sexuality onto them, akin to telling some deep dark secret or something nobody wants to hear or discuss, and it's not telling them your personal sex life either.

    Instead of playing silly bullshit games with people and pretending to only be a wannabe phony bisexual advocate, just come out to people and tell them that you're bisexual.

    Using terms like "out of the closet" or "down low" has nothing to do with being gay as they're terms used by people who are not LGBT at all, and I have met heterosexuals who used the terms.

    People who are deeply closeted will make up tons of excuses why they can't tell people that they're bisexual, and the worst one is that it's nobody's business, and yet these fools complain about how they believe that society does not understand or accept people who are bisexual-yet these cowards refuse to come out. It's not as though they are living in various African countries, middle eastern countries, or Jamaica.

    Quote Originally Posted by DuckiesDarling
    No, Jim Riley, AKA tenni it isn't. Not editing that out either... hide some more?
    Pics of tenni aka Jim Riley:


    Last edited by pole_smoker; Dec 28, 2015 at 3:56 AM.

  22. #22

    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    I've told my wife I'm curious and have bi fantasies, have no need to tell anyone else.

  23. #23
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    I stay in the closet about my bisexuality because I only want to have sex with men and transsexuals, it’s only a physical sexual attraction, but with women it is physical, sexual emotional and romantic attraction, I want to be in relationships with women, not with men or transsexuals, I just see them as sex objects.

  24. #24
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    I keep it to myself. My cocksucking adventures are for me only!

  25. #25
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    A very few people know. My wife does. Obviously the guy I am seeing does. A few men locally do, and a woman I know does as well. Her husband is bisexual and so is she. I also have friends in Las Vegas who know and are in marriages that are open to bisexual relationships.

    I am not into "cock sucking adventures." I like steady relationships, though being naked with a bunch of guys is very nice. I do prefer one-on-one.
    Last edited by Oztrich; Jan 8, 2016 at 11:17 AM.

  26. #26
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    I am pansexual and I have never hid it. My family knows as well as "friends".
    I always seem to be a foot and a half from where I want to be.

  27. #27
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    I am a very closeted bisexual however, I have mentioned it to my mother about having an attraction to the same sex, she just laughed! One of my 3 sisters and half-brother are aware and have no negative input, but just suggest I be sexually careful!!

  28. #28
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    Quote Originally Posted by Toad82 View Post
    I am pansexual and I have never hid it. My family knows as well as "friends".
    Pansexual in the way a lot of people use it is just another term for being bisexual. If YOU were really pansexual you would be sexually attracted to animals and into illegal sex acts as that's the actual definition of the term. Now if you actually do fuck farm animals then yeah you are pansexual.

  29. #29
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    Pansexuality is sexual or emotional attraction or romantic love towards people of any gender or gender identity.. it does not and never has also meant sexual attraction to or activity with other species of animals, domestic or wild except possibly in the twisted minds of the vindictive arseholes of the dimwittery!
    Last edited by darkeyes; Jan 10, 2016 at 6:02 PM.
    Do not think so little of me as to grant me your tolerance. Allow me your acceptance and understanding of who and what I am with the love, respect and dignity with which I do you.

  30. #30
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    Re: Do you hide your sexual attraction to the same sex? Do your friends and family k

    Quote Originally Posted by pole_smoker View Post
    Pansexual in the way a lot of people use it is just another term for being bisexual. If YOU were really pansexual you would be sexually attracted to animals and into illegal sex acts as that's the actual definition of the term. Now if you actually do fuck farm animals then yeah you are pansexual.

    You need to read more.
    I always seem to be a foot and a half from where I want to be.

 

 

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