how hard is it to seperate bisexuality with homosexuality, come on!

[biblkman]

Why is it so hard for heterosexual and some homosexual people to distinguish the difference between bisexuality and homosexuality.

A lot of people can make the distinction betweeen bisexuality and heterosexuality, but seem to have a hard time distinguishing bisexuality and homosexuality.

I recently came out to a very close family member and for some reason could not get that I wasn't gay but bi, kept assuming I was gonna turn gay and kept asking about my attraction to the same sex more than my attraction to the opposite sex, and kept implying that I wanted sex from men more than women when in fact its the other way around.

This is one of the reasons I am still in the closest about my bisexuality accept to a select few.

I am bi and since I am in the closet I don't mind if people assume I'm straight cause I've lived my life as a straight man and had only realized that I was bi when I was 31 or 32.

But I see its easy for people to equate bisexuality with homosexuality.

But hardly ever equate bisexuality with heterosexuality.

I wonder why. And please don't tell me to come out I'm 37 I know what feels right for me!

[Realist]

I'm pretty much the same....and for the same reasons. I've never lived in a location that wasn't conservative and rife with moral extremists.

Those who think everyone should be out, have probably never lived in similar places. I've never felt that anyone needed to know I was bisexual, anyway, unless I was going to date them.

I've had a few conversations, just like you did with your family member, and it's so tiring to attempt to explain yourself to a person, who may never get it, anyway!

[NEBiGuy]

Most people are in the binary modality in their thinking on sex. It's a cultural indoctrination we almost all get exposed to. You're either straight or gay. And people want you to fit into their nice, pre-defined groupings. It's nothing personal, it's all about the culture we live in. If you don't fit with what they understand, it makes them uncomfortable, and they try to talk through it with you in a way that allows them to discard the parts that don't fit "one or the other', so they automatically try to make you fit into "gay". Even gay folks do this with us bisexuals. We're a pariah! Don't let it get you down, though, it's just our culture, not you. Do your best to educate, but don't get hung up on it!

[jem_is_bi]

That is the nature/nurture issue of human sexuality that they are trying to understand about you. Were you preprogramed to be one or the other or somewhere in between? Or, were you primarily molded by your experiences to be one or the other or somewhere in between? Or are you gay, straight or somewhere in between because of a relatively equal mixture of nature and nurture? So, in the context of unknown influences on their life, it is much easier to understand being only straight or gay when they are only one or the other.

[Visexual]

That reminds me of a silly joke/saying we used to use in the car business;

I've been selling cars for years and nobody addresses me as, "hey, car salesman"! But suck one little dick and you're a cocksucker for life!

Seriously though, I had a lesbian friend who was closeted bi. We slept together a few times and she was much more worried about her lesbian friends finding out than I was about my wife finding out. Go figure?

[dafydd]

maybe if u allowed urself to let them think you were gay as much as you allow urself to let others think you're straight u wouldnt be so hard on them. bisexuality *is* homosexuality as much as it is heterosexuality. ur no different from a gay man that sucks cock as u are from a straight man that eats pussy. the prejudice is in you (perhaps subconsciously and hopefully not maliciously) as u are still conforming to a society that favours straights instead of gays. u shouldnt feel threatened that anyone is challenging ur bisexuality by assuming ur gay as much as im sure u dont feel threatened when someone assumes ur straight. its the internalised homophobia that is causing the major part of frustration, not the gays that accept you having a sexuality different from the norm. so what if people think ur gay. tell em once ur bisexual and leave it at that. same with straight people. in the majority of my experience gays dont despise or even distrust bisexuals, they actually think its pretty hot and are welcoming once u get past the initial novelty factor. can u say the same for the reactions of some straight people in ur life? homophobia impacts on bisexuals as well as gays so we should do everything in our power to form allegiances and understanding with our gay friends not create another part of society that complains and rejects their desire towards one gender only. i.e u u should know better.
dont mean to sound patronising. its a struggle for everyone at one time or anything...but being 'frowned' on by gays is nothing to the hurt and pain caused by 'disapproving and disgusted' straight homophobes.

best
Daf

[tenni]

maybe if u allowed urself to let them think you were gay as much as you allow urself to let others think you're straight u wouldnt be so hard on them. bisexuality *is* homosexuality as much as it is heterosexuality. ur no different from a gay man that sucks cock as u are from a straight man that eats pussy. the prejudice is in you (perhaps subconsciously and hopefully not maliciously) as u are still conforming to a society that favours straights instead of gays. u shouldnt feel threatened that anyone is challenging ur bisexuality by assuming ur gay as much as im sure u dont feel threatened when someone assumes ur straight. its the internalised homophobia that is causing the major part of frustration, not the gays that accept you having a sexuality different from the norm. so what if people think ur gay. tell em once ur bisexual and leave it at that. same with straight people. in the majority of my experience gays dont despise or even distrust bisexuals, they actually think its pretty hot and are welcoming once u get past the initial novelty factor. can u say the same for the reactions of some straight people in ur life? homophobia impacts on bisexuals as well as gays so we should do everything in our power to form allegiances and understanding with our gay friends not create another part of society that complains and rejects their desire towards one gender only. i.e u u should know better.
dont mean to sound patronising. its a struggle for everyone at one time or anything...but being 'frowned' on by gays is nothing to the hurt and pain caused by 'disapproving and disgusted' straight homophobes.

best
Daf

As handsome as your bullocks are daf...I say to you ...BULLOCKS!

Why feed the binary nature of monosexuals? I can see telling the the monosexuals once that you are a bisexual. Let it be at that. If they want to label you gay, inform them tht they are being biphobic(not fek'n homophobic as that feeds the bigotry even more than saying that you are gay). Let them look it up..or if so desired get a pint of Guiness and begin the lessons in biphobia...lol

I think that you are correct that in most cases gays will not verbalize the "there is no such thing as bisexuality. You have not yet realized that you are gay" but they may practice some form of Bi Erasure. Isn't that what you are doing by suggesting comments about just let them think that you are gay?

We are not in the middle. We may need to acknowledge that we are different than monosexuals(go to the point of stop using hetero and gay..call it what it is monosexuality vs bisexuality). This is real binary issue for monosexuals. Monoseuxals are attracted to one gender and bisexuals are attracted to both CIS genders.

Another binary is bisexuality vs pansexuality. Few seem curious about that binary.

[Ebonybifemme7]

Yes it is hard for people to understand the difference. The craziest thing is that I've had more gay people come down on me about me being bisexual then straight people, although they have also. I remember hearing this one person at my job say that people CANT be bisexual, and that bi women are women who are just confused, and bi men are really gay men. I'm a woman and thats why I dont tell too many people but if a person really gets to know me (which most people dont nowadays) one on one instead of the person they want to see, then they would understand why.

[olmizzou42]

Recently watched on TV a Morman, of all religions, couple. Married, have a romantic sexual relationship, have kids, but because he's attracted to men they swear he's gay and that it all works out for them through prayer and the help of their church friends. Of course, they're all conservative and won't have their minds changed by facts. Hey folks, if he's fucking her but dreaming of sucking cocks he's bi!

[Swirl]

John Travolta. Notice how everyone insists that he come out as "gay"? Many folk simply can't even contemplate bisexuality.

[bluesky55]

I have given up with discussing bisexuality with straight or gay people because they seem to insist on labeling one so it meets their agenda. I believe that the people that most understand bisexuality are bisexuals. Sad to say but I've been bashed more harshly by gays than straights. i'll continue to eat pussy and suck cock for the rest of my life and to hell with anyone that has a problem with my bisexuality. Discrimination exists on all fronts whether we like it or not. I find no need to shout out my sexuality from the rooftops. I believe in "what goes on behind closed doors between consenting adults is no body else's business."

[dafydd]

Tenni, you have totally misunderstood my point. and i totally disagree with what u say about not doing something cos it feeds bigotry. what nonsense. of course u should challenge biphobia and homophobia, of course u should inform people they are being biphobic but at some point u can only state who u are and its their problem if they like it or not. i dont believe in bi erasure and if u actually paid any attention to any of my projects as i do of urs ud know that is a ludicrous accusation. my intention wasnt to advocate bi erasure, exactly the opposite. ur reacting to something that uve assumed i was saying in my post that i wasnt.

with respect
ur friend Daf

[dafydd]

I have given up with discussing bisexuality with straight or gay people because they seem to insist on labeling one so it meets their agenda. I believe that the people that most understand bisexuality are bisexuals. Sad to say but I've been bashed more harshly by gays than straights. i'll continue to eat pussy and suck cock for the rest of my life and to hell with anyone that has a problem with my bisexuality. Discrimination exists on all fronts whether we like it or not. I find no need to shout out my sexuality from the rooftops. I believe in "what goes on behind closed doors between consenting adults is no body else's business."

what hapoens if u fall in love with a man and want to do other this with him that dont involve just sex? like hold hands in public or buy a house together do all the other public things straight couples do. not every bisexual relegates their sexuality to just 'behind closed doors'

[tenni]

Lovely Daf
Sorry if I have misunderstood your point. The point that I understood is that you are suggesting that bisexuals say that they are gay rather than hetero because gays are more discriminated than heterosexuals? My point is to look at heteros and gays as monosexuals. We are neither and should not pick a side to identify with. I agree that many bis come from a hetero perspective and slowly realize that they are not hetero. The auto default seems to be to ask if you are gay rather than bisexual. Hell the use of the word monosexual is hardly used and so society is not coming anywhere near close to examining things from that binary possibilities.

I do see your suggestion that bisexuals should identify with gays and being gay as a bi erasure thought or perspective.


You need to tell me more about your projects. I am aware of one very interesting project that you did tell me about. It was sexuality based as I recall.


Now, you lovely man is that a pussy that you are stroking in the photo? or is it a hot doggy

[Gearbox]

I am aware of one very interesting project that you did tell me about. It was sexuality based as I recall.

[dafydd]

Lovely Daf
Sorry if I have misunderstood your point. The point that I understood is that you are suggesting that bisexuals say that they are gay rather than hetero because gays are more discriminated than heterosexuals?

not in in the slightest

[elian]

A lot of gay men may have gone through a process of denying that they are gay - so therefore it follows that perhaps you too, are just in denial...

Nevermind the idea (true or otherwise) that bisexual people are more promiscuous...

[FunE1]

I agree with the others here who have suggested that this is largely a factor of the "binary" thinking most people have about sexuality... Because they have such a strong feeling towards 1 sex vs. the other, they can't imagine how a person could be attracted to both. And since many people have over the years said that they were bi, only to discover later that they were really gay, a lot of people conflate an example that they may have heard about (and/or had more experience with) with a situation they now find themselves in. While it can be annoying to get the "this isn't a faze on the way to gay, is it" question, it is, at least, an attempt by the person to learn more about your sexuality and to understand it, so I try to answer the questions as best I can, so long as they aren't needlessly redundant or blatantly hostile/rude. I find Daddyd's idea of "tell 'em your bi and leave it at that" appealing as well, since, really, what does it matter to them in the long run... aside from, perhaps, understanding that there IS such a thing as bisexuality, it IS real, and at least ONE person they know IS bisexual.

[Ebonybifemme7]

The craziest thing is that gay people dont want straight majority to deny that they exist and to deny them there rights. Its the craziest thing. Its almost like they need something else to look down on.

[dafydd]

A lot of gay men may have gone through a process of denying that they are gay - so therefore it follows that perhaps you too, are just in denial...

Nevermind the idea (true or otherwise) that bisexual people are more promiscuous...

do you mean the OP here elian?

[dafydd]

The craziest thing is that gay people dont want straight majority to deny that they exist and to deny them there rights. Its the craziest thing. Its almost like they need something else to look down on.

to a certain extent yes but its more the cycle of abuse then anything else. u are made outcast and in trying to return to normality u form a social group that makes others outcast, the power u had taken away from u by society u reclaim by taking it away from someone else, much like intense homophobia and biphobia in black communities and elite body fascism in gay ones. its not great but easy to understand how it happens.

[dafydd]

my main point was in saying that closet bisexuals dont tend to get up in arms when people think they are straight, only when people think they are gay. why do u think this is so? i think its because of internalised homophobia. i dont think tenni that you would insist to every straight person who accepted u as straight without question, that u were a bisexual and state that they were exhibiting biphobia as u seem to suggest u would with gays. so my original question in this context was, whats so bad about being considered gay that elicit feelings of frustration that being considered straight doesn't.

it is not I conforming to binary sexualities here. but you conforming to a heterosexual prioritisation of the acceptability of certain sexualities gay vs. straight vs. bisexual. in ur mind being assumed straight in he public eye always comes top. lots of the people on this site are closeted and have accepted and maybe encouraged the embrace of being assumed straight and yet not gay. why?

is it because they believe it is better to be considered straight and not gay? possibly and also understandable given the amount of homophobia in the world. they downplay their homo side and leave it to secret rendezvous and furtive sex and live their public life in the acceptable straight eye. they then get all up in arms when gay people dont accept their bisexuality, and yet at least the gay community would never beat them up, or prevent them with laws or aggressive attitudes from living their bisexual life in the public eye, if they so choose, which they dont. (cue all the stories of bisexuals on here who have been beaten up by gays...im sure that will now come)

not all straight communities would be so accepting...and yet still gays get it in the neck time and time again here (on a site which seems predominantly populated by people in the closet). I'm not saying that biphobia doesnt exist in gay communities, but it is not as hostile as u think. it is NOT the biphobia u find in straight communities. it is not the same. e.g. as i said before, a lot of gays eroticise bisexuals. one of the manifestations of the biphobia is in turning bisexuals into sex objects.. not the punching bags of hate crime.

but u really have no right to be outraged with what gays think about u if ur still cowering in the corner over what straights think about you.
"u cannot pick and choose what u want from a culture and leave it with the burden of inequality" paraphrasing Margaret Cho

or is it that gays make easy targets to vent ur frustration and criticise? go then and stand up to the redneck at the bar and talk about bi erasure and denying u the right to express ur duality of love.., but im guessing this doesnt happen as often gays get the backhand of ur ire. im using 'you' in general context, not directing this at u tenni...i know ur more open than most.

the struggle for gay rights and putting gay rights on the agenda has benefitted bisexuals... thats years of fighting by gays as well as bisexuals for bisexuals..
or perhaps u dont think so..but that really just smacks of internalised homophobia if u think they are giving us a 'bad name'.

**homophobia and internalised homophobia/biphobia gives bisexuals and gays a bad name, not gays**

and bisexuals who are not fully out and cheat on their wives and think that the homo side of their bisexuality is all about fetishistic, anonymous, or clandestine sex give bisexuals the worst names. they perpetuate bi-stereotypes and bi erasure more than anything else.

clean ur own sills before u run a finger of dust along the mantlepiece of others.

Daf

ps.i might see how my first post may have been misinterpreted, i hope this clarifies it. i just didnt want to have to do a freedom march to do so.

[tenni]

Daf
I think that the main difference between our perspectives is that you are discussing monosexuals as two separate sexualities. I’m presenting the two binary sexualities as monosexuals and bisexuals. I’m not preferring heterosexuality over homosexuality. We simply as bisexuals do not discuss the binary that I think should be discussing. We continue to discuss it as a three choice scenario when in reality bisexuals are not happy with either monosexual identity. The monosexuals are both the same in that those people are attracted to one gender while bisexuals are attracted to two genders.


Do bisexuals prefer to identify with heterosexuals if they can get away with it? Publicly yes of course they do as heteroseuxality is the preferred of the monosexuals. It is the dominant monosexuality. Some post on here that the label of a sexuality is not important to them. This seems to be a trait of some bisexuals. It is not a trait of monosexuals(both hetero and gay). Since, those bisexuals do not even want to be bothered with labels, bisexuality may not be getting sufficient air time as to how it differs from monosexuality..both hetero and gay monosexuality. These bisexuals have outgrown their training as a monosexual. Are they more enlightened than monosexuals to not be concerned with sexuality labels? I suspect that they are. Would it not be a better world if who a person is sexually and or emotionally attracted to was not stigmatized?


“in ur mind being assumed straight in he public eye always comes top. lots of the people on this site are closeted and have accepted and maybe encouraged the embrace of being assumed straight and yet not gay. why? “


Some posters on this site, again state that putting a label on their sexuality is of no interest to them. They do not care to come out of a closet like gay monosexuals feel the need to do. This is another difference between monosexuals and bisexuals. Who you have sex with is no one else's business and there is no need to come out. Perhaps, those bisexuals should be making this statement louder? Are they even asked if coming out as bisexual is important to them? (no) Interestingly, I see more young bisexuals feeling the need to say they are bisexual. It does seem to fulfill an identity need for them. I'm not sure why but it does.


is it because they believe it is better to be considered straight and not gay?


Again,you are discussing monosexuals and comparing monosexuals. If given a monosexual binary, what would a sane person select? If given the option to see yourself as a monosexual vs a bisexual, which would a bisexual pick? It depends upon their self esteem imo. It depends upon dialogues that they have participated in. If they have heard only the dialogue about hetero vs gay, they will more than not pick to be perceived as the dominant and least discriminated group.


The OP asks why is it difficult to distinguish between bisexuals and gays. Why is it so difficult to distinguish between bisexuality and homosexuality. Well, we seem not to be exposed to discussions about bisexuality. You and others harp on about comparing hetero and homo rather than monosexual and bisexual. This makes it very hard to separate bisexuality from monosexual whether homosexual or heterosexual.

[Realist]

Personally, I feel that many of us tend to think a thing like this to death!

We analyze, dissect, try to figure out others' motivations, thought processes, and actions, while often never giving a thought to those of our own. It's not that I don't care what others think, it's just that I've never been motivated to try to change their minds, or to attempt to make them think as I do.

A long time ago, I decided to do my own thing, in my own way, and not be too concerned about what everyone else did, or thought.

People with similar interests will naturally come together, while those who don't understand, have different tastes, or beliefs, will gravitate toward our own intellectual groups. I see a huge variation of interests just in this site alone. If I feel the same way about something, I will want to share with that group. If I don't, I may read their thoughts, but usually won't get involved in conversations about subjects I have little, or no interest in.

The trouble is, when different groups condemn, over analyze, and attack (verbally, or physically) instead of tolerate, or accept, animosity reigns. Communication is hampered, theories are often founded on conjecture, and friction evolves. I don't want to be a part of that.

Being a little less "in your face" and private, I've avoided much of this friction and lived the way I wanted to in relative peace and satisfaction.

[dafydd]

Personally, I feel that many of us tend to think a thing like this to death!

We analyze, dissect, try to figure out others' motivations, thought processes, and actions, while often never giving a thought to those of our own. It's not that I don't care what others think, it's just that I've never been motivated to try to change their minds, or to attempt to make them think as I do.

A long time ago, I decided to do my own thing, in my own way, and not be too concerned about what everyone else did, or thought.

People with similar interests will naturally come together, while those who don't understand, have different tastes, or beliefs, will gravitate toward our own intellectual groups. I see a huge variation of interests just in this site alone. If I feel the same way about something, I will want to share with that group. If I don't, I may read their thoughts, but usually won't get involved in conversations about subjects I have little, or no interest in.

The trouble is, when different groups condemn, over analyze, and attack (verbally, or physically) instead of tolerate, or accept, animosity reigns. Communication is hampered, theories are often founded on conjecture, and friction evolves. I don't want to be a part of that.

Being a little less "in your face" and private, I've avoided much of this friction and lived the way I wanted to in relative peace and satisfaction.

that is one way to live but not everyone is afforded the luxury of privacy.
for some people it is important to voice their views and to attempt to change things.
also if uve ever been discriminated against, been a victim of hate crime or lost ur job because of ur sexuality, or losing custody rights to ur child simply remaining quiet and accepting isnt an option.
also you wouldn't be afforded the quieter life of a bisexual if others hadnt spoken out on ur behalf in the ongoing civil rights movement. i appreciate what u say and respect it but you must accept others have to talk about these issues as much as you prefer not to to be "in your face", which i think is a kindof self hating phrase anyway. what do u class as in ur face? wearing assless jeans? holding ur partners hand in public? having a debate on a bisexual website? takin pics of ur anus and posting it online? all or none?
why do u comment on some decent discussion on the nature of sexuality as 'in your face' and not the streams of pics of cocks in panties and the like? weird reversal in my mind. if u can take obscene porn surely u can take a small rally? or does it irritate u in some other way? there is absolutely a place for these kind of discussions here...there used to be a lot more of em.
i can see how what i say sounds irritating in a preachy way... i dont want to sound preachy but its always the way in these kind of discussions. i try to have a sense of humour about most things on here, but for some reason i lose all joking sensibilities on these subjects. maybe its the so called 'banging on' that annoys rather than the heart of what im sayin. if im alienating myself from the people im talking to in a discussion then thats not good, and i should try to modify my tone. nothing ever gets discussed when noone is available to listen. i get that. i can understand this. and accept it. its just an issue close to my heart. its not overanalysed in my mind, cos its my life, and i want to analyse it because when i do i make better decisions, understand others better and lead a happier life. we're not all in the grips of some woody allen angst or constantly in danger of reliving the stress and worry that ties us to a virtual psychiatrists coach. not everyone is that fragile because of their thoughts, or at risk of depression if we mull on existential issues too much. in my mind *not* exploring who i am leads to poor mental health. basically, no need to worry about others having breakdowns over this realist.

thanks for posting anyway realist. but adding to this discussion one just appears like ur going against ur wish to not care what others think, or not make them think like u do. ur adding to because u bave an opinion as am i. why say u dont care if you really dont care? odd. join in and know ur joining in, better than sending allusions of zen mastery that ur in a gin and tonic commercial where 'hey... its just not important guys..relax baby'

Daf

[Realist]

Basically, I was attempting to convey that I have no quarrel with anyone with different interests, or opinions, other than mine. But, a person's perceived manner has a lot to do whether, or not, their issue becomes a compelling point, or an aggravation to be skirted. I appreciate an exchange of ideas/ideals, but not shouting matches, or rude, aggressive, antagonism.

That's the reason I responded in this case. As I was reading responses I noticed some feel a lot more emphatic about some issues, that I don't...or have totally different motivations. And, no one was in an "In your face mode"!

Rethinking it, I should have been more clear.

[cuttin2dachase]

For many people, everything is black and white with no gray area between. Those people, whether straight or homosexual, will never understand bisexuality. It's completely beyond their comprehension. They tend to believe that everyone must be one or the other. I am very closeted with no desire to come out, so I've never been judged by str8 heterosexuals. To them, I am an everyday, masculine hetero guy. Having been twice married, my sexual experience is 95% heterosexual. 1st wife and I were swingers and she encouraged me to try bi things with men we met for 3somes. I obliged her and I have enjoyed and sought sexual experiences with men and couples with bi men ever since. In my early bi experiences, I met several gay men, all of whom tried to convince me that I was gay and that there was no way I could enjoy and desire women sexually after the way I made love to them LOL I told them that my desire for and enjoyment of casual sex AND lovemaking with both women and men is the very essence and proof of my bisexuality. I was cursed, hounded, threatened with outing and stalked by 2 of those gay men. I have since sought only bi men (preferably married) and married couples with bi men for bi sex and lovemaking. Bi married men are definitely the best (and kinkiest) male lovers

[biblkman]

To daf...

Let give a more simpler example...

If a person who grew up Christian started thinking and doubting and came to the conclusion or realization that they are agnost but chose to keep it to themselves beacause they don't want to deal with everyones opinions or feel the need to explain there position.

Now let's say that person to a Christian relative they were agnostic , but the Christian kept implying and trying to tell the agnostic that there really an atheist, even though the agnostic keeps trying to explain there position.

So this agnostic chooses to let people believe they are Christian beacause its just easier and thats what the agnostic identified with for so long.

No different if a bisexual who for 30 sum years lived and thought they were homosexual until a few years ago... decided to keep it from theo homosexual community because they don't want to be labeled straight when they are bi , but don't have a problem with people assuming there homosexual because that's how they lived most of there lives.

I'm sure that bisexual who once identified as homosexual would rather people thought of them as homosexual then heterosexual.

My question was why do most straight people and some gays think bisexuality is basically homosexuality, but understand completely that bisexuality is not the same as heterosexuality.

Do you have an opinion on the question I posed or just on my frustration with being called gay when I'm bi.

[Gearbox]

In my early bi experiences, I met several gay men, all of whom tried to convince me that I was gay and that there was no way I could enjoy and desire women sexually after the way I made love to them LOL

That's exactly what I've had too.lol Makes you wonder if they tell the gay ones who don't enjoy sex with them that much, to go get some pussy instead.

I was cursed, hounded, threatened with outing and stalked by 2 of those gay men.

That's just fucked up! I doubt other gays would support that, and they were just a pair of mentally imbalanced twats with too much free time.

[donlikesdicks]

I believe the problem with your question is your insistence on classifying behavior. Sexual acts just are what they are: sexual acts and behaviors. Social scientists are interested in classification, but we need not share that interest. Those of us who do share the need or desire to classify sexual behavior as this or that type can do so at their pleasure, risking only misunderstanding. Personally, I don't feel the need to explain or justify why I like to suck dick or pussy, or fuck or be fucked. I have no political or sociological need to classify what I enjoy. I do still feel a need to keep enjoying sex with both men and women, and while I find the female body much more attractive and lovely, I find the male sexual organ more fun to put my lips around, especially when I can coax a nice load of cum from it.