Homosexuality triggered only by feminity?

Hi there

I am thinking a lot about my bisexuality these days. I am one of these guys who can crave and enjoy homosexual sex very much (in a gay-bathroom for example) but don't feel any attraction to men in everyday's life.

I feel extremely attracted to women and/or am looking at them very much. But sometimes it seems confusing if i want to have Sex with those girls or if i am not just extremely jealous of them, wanting to look like them and to be them. This happen when i see very feminine girls/women who wear sexy clothes.

I would not want to be a woman in my normal life but when i'm having Sex with men i really feel entirely like a woman. I did not crossdress yet because it's too much effort and energy. But i can really feel that during Sex with a man i behave and feel very feminine. And i am only a bottom (would never want to fuck actively a guy but love the sensation of being fucked when it's done with passion and i am threated like a submissive "girl" but without brutality, more like beetween a man and woman).

Sometimes i am watching videos of girlfriends who cheat on their boyfriends and record it. I am extremely turned on by those videos but can feel that in such moments i am much more dreaming about being them and be a slut myself much more than wanting to fuck them. I had the same when i started watching pornography 25 years ago. I was extremely attracted to the girl's cute faces but at the same time fantasized more about it would be me pleasing the guy.

I know that for most real gay men there is no feminity and they dont feel attracted to feminity. That's absolutely not my case. That's why i am asking myslf about how homosexual i really am.

I was surprised to find barely nothing in the Internet about the psychology of guys like me (where their homosexuality reflects their own feminity or is triggered by a feminine image of themselves).

I am a guy that is not very masculine (without beeing especially feminine) but i am very slim, like to shave myslf, sometimes even the legs. I am very sensitive and envy girls not only for their sexuality but also for wearing sexy clothes like miniskirts etc.

At the same time i need girlfriends to feel emotionally well and loved. And i have also sexual needs to fuck them actively and can enjoy it very much but these needs are quite low. Just from time to time. I think that i have more needs to have Sex with a penis and being penetrated because it fits better to the feminine image i'm having about myself during sex.

So i would be really happy if some of you guys have similar experiences about the way they experience their homosexual part without being necesserely a transgender and feeling like that in their "normal" life.

I guess the main trigger is that i would want to feel desired like sexy girls are being desired by men, so it looks like psychological issues more than real identity?

For example: when i can feel that a guy is desiring me i completely melt and have a huge attraction to offer myself to him. So wanting to have sex with men only appears if i can feel the guy wanting me. In general i'm having stronger orgasms during sex with men than with women. Otherwise (as mentioned) i never experienced any kind of attraction to men in everyday's life.

If you find interesting artciles about guys like me i would be very interested. I hope i am not the only one like that....

Very good post. I’m sure that you are not alone with these feeling. There are probably others that share, at least to some degree, those same feelings. As for myself, I really don’t look at guys and lust for them like I do for women. Ok I take that back. There was this one time that I saw a guy and would’ve dropped to my knees to pleasure him if I’d had the opportunity other than that 1 instance, my lust has been for women. Usually older, mature women. But I do long for that feeling that only a male to male sexual experience can bring

I agree with your statements and feel extremely similar. I love women and love sex with women but the feeling of a guy using my body for his pleasure and listing after me is amazing. I wear thong undies and love the feel of a pair of yoga pants when I have the house to myself.

You are not alone!!

Thanks guys for your inputs. Nice to see i am not alone ;-)

As a man who loves both when a male partner is feminine in his attitude , demeanour , mannerisms and truely responds when treated as a girl , woman , female its beautiful it only makes my desire for them to reach a fevered pitch and taking them the way a man should take his gurl over and over and over making her mine in every way .......... How could I not love it

well, I do not have any answers for you but can tell you my own feelings. When I see a sexy man (sexy as per my definition - a little androgynous) I absolutely lust after his cock and want to please his cock and have him cum in my mouth. When I see a sexy woman (again, sexy per my definition) I absolutely want to please her any way I can. Typically, in both instances, I want to be blown in both of these situations. I want to snowball in both of these situations. So for me, it is all about oral enjoyment with my sexy partner. The only real difference is that there are far fewer men that fit my definition of sexy than there are sexy women. But, if someone is sexy, I can get turned on almost immediately.

But if i understand it right, there are no other bisexual men who want to have sex with men after having been triggered by the view of sexy girls and wanting to be them and to play the feminine role with men? How comes i read quite often about men who discovered they were attracted to cocks after having watched a porn of a girl performing a blowjob and that they were dreaming of being that girl in that sexual interaction? It doesn‘t seem to be that uncommon i would have say. So i was wondering. For me it’s the main trigger of wanting to have sex with men. Otherwise i feel no attraction at all to men. But it could be a pathology then if i admire women so much that i sometimes dream about being one/having the same sexual appeal and feel desired like they do and not a true bisexuality...hmm...that‘s complicated! :eek2:

no doubt it can get complicated! sounds like u appreciate femininity so much, u want a deeper experiance of it. plus u still need that element of femininity in any experiance with men. i have kinda similar feelings. keep in mind i have never been with a guy so for me this is all theoretical. i love women. sometimes i use to dress up in panties & other women's undergarments. i liked to have those elements of femininity in my life. but i think mostly the reason was i haven't been with too many women either & it was a way to experiance having some female attention in my life. i dont do that much anymore mostly because as i get older i loose my faith more in ever finding that happiness ever again. maybe that's a reason i turn my sexual attention to men. even then i'm not so eager lately.
another trigger for me is the thought of 2 women togather. i've mentioned this here before probably many times. i don't think there is anything hotter, anything more erotic, more sensual, more beautifull than 2 women making love to each other. to me it's the height of sexuality!! i know most guys would love to watch 2 women doing it & obviously i'm 1 of those guys. but for me i appreciate it on a deeper level than most guys. it's to the point i kinda wouldn't even wanna watch in real life because i feel my masculine presence would spoil the beauty of what's going on. its that special. so of course i would like to experiance that so the thought of me being with someone of the same sex comes to mind & has it's appeal based on my appreciation of female only funtime. the big difference is, i wouldn't mind having a women watch me with another guy. in fact it would be some kinda weird acceptance for me. plus i would love to give a women the same pleasure i get when thinking about 2 women togather. oh would i love to give that pleasure! in fact i would love to give most any pleasure i could give to a women.

Thanks Sysper. I love watching girl/girl too because like you i really admire the female-body. And i noticed same thing as you as well: my homosexual side becomes stronger when i don't have any woman to "play with" and when lacking the emotional connection that only women can give me. So it looks like i deal with the frustration by reinforcing my homosexual-side from time to time. But i am still bisexual because straight guys would not go out sucking some dicks when they are frustrated :) So i must admit that i am not 100% straight.

I'ts a pitty you didn try with men. Why is that?

And what about all transvestites/crossedressers who are bisexual? I guess they would have pretty similar feelings as me when having Sex with men: being the female-part because they admire women so much and use it as a trigger when they have Sex with males.

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Originally Posted by Franz007

Hi there

I am thinking a lot about my bisexuality these days. I am one of these guys who can crave and enjoy homosexual sex very much (in a gay-bathroom for example) but don't feel any attraction to men in everyday's life.

I feel extremely attracted to women and/or am looking at them very much. But sometimes it seems confusing if i want to have Sex with those girls or if i am not just extremely jealous of them, wanting to look like them and to be them. This happen when i see very feminine girls/women who wear sexy clothes.

I would not want to be a woman in my normal life but when i'm having Sex with men i really feel entirely like a woman. I did not crossdress yet because it's too much effort and energy. But i can really feel that during Sex with a man i behave and feel very feminine. And i am only a bottom (would never want to fuck actively a guy but love the sensation of being fucked when it's done with passion and i am threated like a submissive "girl" but without brutality, more like beetween a man and woman).

Sometimes i am watching videos of girlfriends who cheat on their boyfriends and record it. I am extremely turned on by those videos but can feel that in such moments i am much more dreaming about being them and be a slut myself much more than wanting to fuck them. I had the same when i started watching pornography 25 years ago. I was extremely attracted to the girl's cute faces but at the same time fantasized more about it would be me pleasing the guy.

I know that for most real gay men there is no feminity and they dont feel attracted to feminity. That's absolutely not my case. That's why i am asking myslf about how homosexual i really am.

I was surprised to find barely nothing in the Internet about the psychology of guys like me (where their homosexuality reflects their own feminity or is triggered by a feminine image of themselves).

I am a guy that is not very masculine (without beeing especially feminine) but i am very slim, like to shave myslf, sometimes even the legs. I am very sensitive and envy girls not only for their sexuality but also for wearing sexy clothes like miniskirts etc.

At the same time i need girlfriends to feel emotionally well and loved. And i have also sexual needs to fuck them actively and can enjoy it very much but these needs are quite low. Just from time to time. I think that i have more needs to have Sex with a penis and being penetrated because it fits better to the feminine image i'm having about myself during sex.

So i would be really happy if some of you guys have similar experiences about the way they experience their homosexual part without being necesserely a transgender and feeling like that in their "normal" life.

I guess the main trigger is that i would want to feel desired like sexy girls are being desired by men, so it looks like psychological issues more than real identity?

For example: when i can feel that a guy is desiring me i completely melt and have a huge attraction to offer myself to him. So wanting to have sex with men only appears if i can feel the guy wanting me. In general i'm having stronger orgasms during sex with men than with women. Otherwise (as mentioned) i never experienced any kind of attraction to men in everyday's life.

If you find interesting artciles about guys like me i would be very interested. I hope i am not the only one like that....

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For me I am sexually attracted to men and romantically attracted to women.. yes sex is involved in both but the sexual attention to men is just sex.. now I admit I almost prefer sex with men over sex with women.. it still is just sex.. I love being a man and having sex with another man and knowing that things that I am doing and or the things he is doing to me are pleasuring him.. my orgasums are much more intense when being fucked really well than when fucking a women.. sucking another mans cock and it getting harder in my mouth and then him mounting my pussy and driving himself balls deep inside of me.. hearing his breathing change and feeling his cock swelling as he gets ready to cum.. hearing him grunt and groan as he thrusts the last few thrusts as deep as he can in my pussy to cum..
hearing him gasp for air as he plants his seed in me as deep as he can.. those, those are primal desires.. knowing that he has done those things because I have given him what he needed.. that is true pleasure.. he fucked me and I sucked him and gave him all the pleasure he needed to plant his seed in me.. and while fucking me he made me cum all over both of us.. this is why I love sex with men..

i know so far i love women, in case u couldn't tell lol. still confused about how i feel about men. wondering if my interest is genuine. i've just never had the chance to get with a guy. it would be interesting for me to try.
i see ur point about xdressers. they might love femininity so much they wanna experiance it as much as they can. but i wonder how many think like that & how many really feel transgender? that's an interesting conversation i'm sure.

@Tight1-4u: i am quite the same! I only fall in love into women and like to have sex with them. But Sex with men gives me much more intense orgasms than women! They just do everything and aren‘t affraid of doing nasty things that i like. They lick my ass and tits in a way that is just amazing. And being fucked is just awesome. And i like to receive their semen everywhere and in me as well of course. At the same time i like touching women because of their smell, soft skin and hair, but low need to fuck them, am more about eating them out. So i guess i still need both.

@sysper: so you have not ahigh craving of wanting to try it with men then. You can go to a gay-bathroo, for example to see how you like doing sexual things with them. And am happy you understand my trigger of feminity to play the same role with men ;-)