Am I unselfish for not wanting to let him cum in my mouth?

I totally love sucking cock, and think I’m good at it. I can deep throat an average six inches, I love licking balls and teasing the shaft and head and bringing my guy to the edge.

But I never ever have let a guy cum in my mouth. A few weeks ago I came as close as ever, but pulled him out (we were in 69) so I could concentrate on my own orgasm in his mouth. He seemed a little disappointed (I guess - no words were spoken) but I’m sure if I went back today he’d take me in his mouth again while all I’d do is suck.

Is that too selfish?

if it aint your thing, it aint your thing

It’s your body your choice!!

It’s not for everyone, some focus too much on the taste if they aren’t into it and some love the taste. I personally don’t care much for it either... buttttt thinking about him busting because I did my job is hot enough to make up for it... I’d say as long as you don’t leave him hanging without finishing somehow you aren’t selfish

If I were in your position, I would mention it beforehand. As others have said, it's just not for everyone.

It can be so unpleasant for some, that they gag or nearly puke. I'd hate to be enjoying myself and cum in someone's mouth, only have him or her choke & gag, or run to the bathroom to spit it out! What a turnoff that would be!

I take good care of myself and make dietary choices that optimize the taste of my cum, in that it shouldn't be overly salty or bitter, and find that most of my play partners enjoy sucking me to completion. And I enjoy providing equivalent pleasure to them, as well! I honestly can't say that I 'love' the taste of cum, but I do enjoy the psychological impact of being a good cocksucker. :bigrin:

Thanks to all for your comments so far. This guy is really my go to for me to get off, but the last few times our nude yoga/massage ended the same - 69 and me cumming in his mouth. He’s always been available to me, and gives a so so Massage to go along with the nice blowjob and his taste cock.

I think if I meet “the guy” - someone I have an emotional connection with - I’d want to give him the same pleasure that I experience. As I said, I think I’m a pretty good cocksucker, so I’d love to have the moment where I bring the right guy to his knees with a full blast in my mouth.

I think you should try it and you may find that you love it as most men do and become addicted to the taste of cum.
Try it for four or five times and then decide what you like or don't like. Nothing ventured nothing gained. I personally
love it and am addicted to cum. that is why I suck cock for the cum.

Nothing is better than swallowing a load and it feels so good fir the guy shooting. Why not give him the best feeling ever. You said you deep throat some guys...let a guy cum while you're deep throating him...no taste, no mess, just slides down back of your throat...hardly know he was there. If really worried about cum, suck him with a condom on and feel it pulsating as he shoots....then take it off and give it a taste...no one should rob themselves (or the partner) of cumming in their mouth. Is my favorite thing.

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Originally Posted by sdbrit

if it aint your thing, it aint your thing

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Same for me.

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Originally Posted by Flypaper

I totally love sucking cock, and think I’m good at it. I can deep throat an average six inches, I love licking balls and teasing the shaft and head and bringing my guy to the edge.

But I never ever have let a guy cum in my mouth. A few weeks ago I came as close as ever, but pulled him out (we were in 69) so I could concentrate on my own orgasm in his mouth. He seemed a little disappointed (I guess - no words were spoken) but I’m sure if I went back today he’d take me in his mouth again while all I’d do is suck.

Is that too selfish?

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I say it is shelfish. What is the problem? Do you gag, or just don't want to do it? You don't have to swallow it. Just keep a towel nearby to subtly spit it into. He probably won't care.

If he is a regular and you see each other often, then you should learn to swallow. The is the ultimate show of respect. To disrespect his seed is to disrespect him.

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Originally Posted by oralswallow65

Nothing is better than swallowing a load and it feels so good fir the guy shooting. Why not give him the best feeling ever. You said you deep throat some guys...let a guy cum while you're deep throating him...no taste, no mess, just slides down back of your throat...hardly know he was there. If really worried about cum, suck him with a condom on and feel it pulsating as he shoots....then take it off and give it a taste...no one should rob themselves (or the partner) of cumming in their mouth. Is my favorite thing.

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No taste?? Then why do some people’s gag, is it more from the volume, not the taste?

I like the the idea of starting with a comdom on. I’d definitely love to feel the thickness erupt and his jerking cock in my mouth as he orgasms. I guess I’m just still too much of a newbie to accept the seed straight away.

If if I can really get the cum to just flow down my throat I think it really would be addictive. I LOVE the feel of a cock in my mouth...

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Originally Posted by softheart

I say it is shelfish. What is the problem? Do you gag, or just don't want to do it? You don't have to swallow it. Just keep a towel nearby to subtly spit it into. He probably won't care.

If he is a regular and you see each other often, then you should learn to swallow. The is the ultimate show of respect. To disrespect his seed is to disrespect him.

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i think you are right, it is selfish of me. This guy is my masseur so it’s a transactional relationship, I guess mentally I think “He’s getting paid to relax me, nit the other way around”. But this last time I definitely got the sense that he was disappointed (but nit upset).

I dont gag when I deep throat, but I’ve never taken a load so I don’t know if it will just flow down my throat like oralswallow says or if I will gag. I think trying first with a condom, and then tasting it afterwards is a good way to start. I definitely don’t like to deny anyone pleasure, and I know this is something I’d like to try.

Personally, I believe that it would be more selfish of him to make you feel uncomfortable about not swallowing (if that's the case, you don't specify).
The fact is that, just as with everything in sex, in life, you have to choose what makes you happy. If you are not comfortable doing something, than ultimately neither of you will enjoy the sex, and you will wind up resenting each other. A successful relationship, sexual or otherwise, is about establishing and respecting boundaries

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Originally Posted by Flypaper

This guy is my masseur so it’s a transactional relationship...

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IMO, this is a gamechanger. It becomes a 'The customer is always right' situation. So you call the shots and don't feel badly about it.

I have no experience in this area, but I agree with some of the commenters who said that it may simply not be your thing.

About half the women I've been with eagerly swallowed my cum and the other half wanted to be warned so they could move their faces as far from my cock as possible. I never felt that I was being cheated by the second group. It just wasn't for them - and I get that.

I understand your point though about possibly feeling selfish by the other guy letting you cum in his mouth and you not wanting him to cum in yours. Again though, if it isn't your thing...

If you have a regular suck buddy with whom you feel comfortable, you may eventually want to let him cum in your mouth to feel closer to him. I've heard several women say that taking cum in their mouth is the most intimate thing they can do.

Whatever you do - or don't - the choice is yours.

As others have picked up on, since I’m there for a massage and release, I never thought he expected me to suck him off. But with both of us naked and him at the head of the table, it was natural for me to first hold his cock and then eventually to deepthroat him and suck his balls as he worked my back and ass.

Twice now weve we’ve ended up in pretty athletic 69 and only this last time did I feel like when I came in his mouth but didn’t finish him myself that he might have been left a little unsatisfied.

No no words about this were exchanged and we don’t have an emotional thing so I don’t feel obliged. But I do feel a bit sorry that I was giving him a pretty good blowjob but ultimately left him with “blue balls”.

Tha ks again to you and all who have commented!

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Originally Posted by Nudepolybiguy

Personally, I believe that it would be more selfish of him to make you feel uncomfortable about not swallowing (if that's the case, you don't specify).
The fact is that, just as with everything in sex, in life, you have to choose what makes you happy. If you are not comfortable doing something, than ultimately neither of you will enjoy the sex, and you will wind up resenting each other. A successful relationship, sexual or otherwise, is about establishing and respecting boundaries

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Give it a try. Let him know you've not tried it before, that it might make you choke or spit, that your nervous about it. He will probably be understanding about it. Then, you will know if its a "blech, never again!", a 'hmmmm, maybe next time too", or a game changer "yum!!".

If you don't feel comfortable taking the guys cum you don't have to. I sucked a few guys at a adult store but never took their cum

On the surface, it appears to be selfish and while I agree that taking a nut in the mouth isn't for everyone, I asked myself how I'd feel if I was in a 69 with a guy, he's making me feel damned good, he unloads in my mouth but when I'm shoved over the edge, he stops short of finishing me like that... and my first thought - and if I really didn't know any better - would be that this guy ain't all that different from the many women who've gotten me to the point of unloading... and then stop or otherwise head for the hills and while demanding that I never take my mouth off of them as they cum.

Hmm. It's interesting in that a lot of guys get into M2M cock sucking because women aren't of a mind to finish off the dick like that and everyone "knows" that when guys blow each other, finishing is pretty much a given except it's not always so. Some guys don't like the taste; the volume and consistency of the spunk can make them gag even if they're not trying to swallow it. Here's the reality: Do you think you're being selfish? I know my protege had this issue in the early days of his bisexuality; he'd gleefully dump huge loads into the other guy's mouth but when the other guy was about to cum, he'd head for the hills in a hurry; he'd tell me how it made him feel just thinking about taking the nut in his mouth but, at the same time, he was concerned with why his partners would feel some kind of way about him not taking their load as they did for him. I asked him to put himself into their place and give some thought about how he'd feel to have someone doing a wonderful job of sucking his cock and then, at the "magic moment," just stop. He admitted that he wouldn't like it and understood how it can ruin a moment; he said that he'd feel frustrated and disappointed and I just said to him, "Hmm..." My protege defended his position by saying he didn't want to catch something nasty in his mouth and all I said was, "But you're more than happy to expose your boys to that potential risk?"

Taking a load in the mouth isn't the no-brainer a lot of people think it is. At the same time, there's this... expectation we have, a kind of "fairness," if you will that says if I suck your dick and you cum in my mouth - doesn't matter if I swallow or spit it out after the fact - then you should be willing to do the same for me. If you have issues with cum in your mouth, that sense of fairness suggests that you let the guy know before the dicks come out that you're not going to let him finish in your mouth; maybe he'll be okay with that; maybe he'll be okay but won't allow you to bust in his mouth... and maybe it'll be a deal-breaker and no cocks will be getting sucked.

Flypaper said, "I think if I meet “the guy” - someone I have an emotional connection with - I’d want to give him the same pleasure that I experience. As I said, I think I’m a pretty good cocksucker, so I’d love to have the moment where I bring the right guy to his knees with a full blast in my mouth..." and, maybe it's just me, but this is a pretty key and important statement that's easily understandable from his point of view but may not be all that acceptable to the guy, sans that connection, that isn't allowed to return the favor in kind, as it were. Having said that, some guys don't give a fuck about busting in your mouth as long as (1) the cock sucking felt good to them and (2) they got to bust their nuts wide open albeit all over the place... but that's not to say that all guys would be okay with that and some would eventually wonder what the fuck is up and what's going on - he's busting nuts in my mouth like there's no tomorrow... but I can't bust one in his? True enough, there are a lot of guys who don't want to be bothered with getting their dicks sucks and their balls emptied so for them, this isn't being selfish or a problem.

It's all about personal preferences, at the end of the day. Flypaper says this guy is his go-to dude which implies he's kinda regular and, perhaps, it doesn't matter to this guy if he doesn't get to cum in Flypaper's mouth or, if it does, he's not saying anything about it - but Flypaper is aware of the guy's disappointment and it's been my experience that if a guy keeps getting "disappointed," things can grind to a halt because - and this is important - the other guy thinks it's unfair and selfish. I'm not saying that Flypaper is wrong or being selfish; again, his reasoning is valid from his point of view but, now speaking directly to Flypaper, ya might wanna find out if your go-to guy is happy with things as they are or it he is, indeed, disappointed, how might that affect things going forward?

You're gonna feel the way you feel about it and, again, at the end of the day, it is about what you think and feel about doing that. It's only fucked up if you think it's fucked up, right? But if the other guy thinks it's fucked up, does what he think really matter to you?

Thank you as always for your thoughtful comment, KDaddy. Because of the massage therapy nature of our engagements, we certainly didn’t start out with any expectation that I’d even take his cock in my mouth. But as I’ve done it twice now, without allowing him to nit while still showing my enjoyment of his cock and balls, perhaps I’m allowing expectations to build.

By merely asking the group if im being selfish, I obviously wonder that. But I honestly think that I can return to his massage table in a few weeks and I’ll still get a mediocre rub down with a nice blowjob.

No, but you're missing a lot. The taste and texture of cum is all part of it and I find it a reward for a good sucking.

I have been in situations where guys have ignored my statements that I do not swallow cum from cocks and they have insisted during oral of pushing their cocks deep into my mouth and cumming, which has resulted in a punch in the head......

now my male lover was great, he was understanding, we reached a compromise where I would suck him until he was about to cum and one of the other ladies would swallow cos they enjoyed it... it worked fine, and so I was able to reach a point where I would hold his cock in my mouth and allow him to cum, which he valued as we considered it a joint thing that added to the whole experience but cumming in a guys mouth was not a obligation or right, as far as he was concerned......sadly hes in palliative care and due to come home to die.

our group ( two females and my intersex female partner ) are looking for a new male / couple to join us, and we have clear guidelines like cumming in mouths is not an obligation or right, which has resulted in some guys just being down right nasty as, cos as far as they are concerned its a right and people are obligated to suck and swallow, or they get to fuck somebody and cum in them... which does not fit with our group as me cumming, can mean cumming on my stomach and chest so the ladies can sharing licking it up and kissing with a group kiss ( a mutual group agreement ) not sucking cos they are told to and having to swallow when they are not in the mood, or being fucked when they are not in the mood..... so no I do not regard not swallowing as selfish at all,

I ALWAYS love to swallow cum...that said, you are perfectly right to support your option...it is up to you and I truly respect and support you to not allow cum in your mouth...just wish I could be with you and after you give a wonderful blow job they could switch and unleash their load in my mouth!

I don't think not swallowing matters to a guy one wit. What would have been selfish would be having him pleasure your cock and you not return the flavor. I have a few buddies who take me through my orgasm and then spit it out and I don't care a bit.