I am going to describe myself in detail, and you tell me if I'm bisexual or not

[UnknownEntity]

Up until I was about 20 years old, I was always purely straight. I didn't start being sexually attracted to men until then, and the attraction has gradually gotten stronger since then. I'm 23 now, and I feel I am more sexually attracted to men than women at times, but I'm still attracted to both genders. However, I have never really considered the option of a romantic relationship with a male, and over the past 3 years, my desire to be romantically linked to a female has diminished to almost nothing, but if I had to choose, I'd say I'm still more emotionally attached to females than males, although my emotional attraction in general has practically disappeared. I guess I had one too many bad relationships.

However, although I am sexually attracted to men, I don't follow any of the gay stereotypes at all. Nor do I follow any straight stereotypes. For one, I hate anal sex and would never engage in it, and that's a staple of homosexuality. Without anal sex, gays can't officially have sex with each other, so if I did have a relationship with a man, it would have to be sexless in that sense. The main thing that attracts me to men is, of course, their penis, and getting them hard... I also have a thing for cum, I have swallowed my own on occasion, but it's not the same as taking someone else's in my mouth. As for women, the main thing that attracts me to them is their body, especially a very shapely one. However, when it comes to sex itself, I don't seem to enjoy it as much as most men do, I just love to feel a woman's body. I suppose what really turns me on the most is watching other people who are turned on.

I'm still trying to decide whether I'm bisexual or bicurious, and whether I will continue to be more and more attracted to males. What would you all consider me as?

[Long Duck Dong]

Up until I was about 20 years old, I was always purely straight. I didn't start being sexually attracted to men until then, and the attraction has gradually gotten stronger since then. I'm 23 now, and I feel I am more sexually attracted to men than women at times, but I'm still attracted to both genders. However, I have never really considered the option of a romantic relationship with a male, and over the past 3 years, my desire to be romantically linked to a female has diminished to almost nothing, but if I had to choose, I'd say I'm still more emotionally attached to females than males, although my emotional attraction in general has practically disappeared. I guess I had one too many bad relationships.

However, although I am sexually attracted to men, I don't follow any of the gay stereotypes at all. Nor do I follow any straight stereotypes. For one, I hate anal sex and would never engage in it, and that's a staple of homosexuality. Without anal sex, gays can't officially have sex with each other, so if I did have a relationship with a man, it would have to be sexless in that sense. The main thing that attracts me to men is, of course, their penis, and getting them hard... I also have a thing for cum, I have swallowed my own on occasion, but it's not the same as taking someone else's in my mouth. As for women, the main thing that attracts me to them is their body, especially a very shapely one. However, when it comes to sex itself, I don't seem to enjoy it as much as most men do, I just love to feel a woman's body. I suppose what really turns me on the most is watching other people who are turned on.

I'm still trying to decide whether I'm bisexual or bicurious, and whether I will continue to be more and more attracted to males. What would you all consider me as?

one thing, anal sex is not a staple of homosexual relations..... there are many gays that never have anal sex...... they enjoy oral sex and masturbation.... without anal sex

now I am similar to you is that having sex is not everything people crack it up to be..... I draw more enjoyment out of my partners enjoyment, the way they react etc... than sticking my dick in..... its not wrong, it means that you, like me are not drawn to sex or feel that sex is the be all to end all
its a form of empathic sensitivity, you are more sensitive to the * energy * of a person than the physical aspects....

ok, are you bisexual or bi curious..... well, bi curious are people that have never had sex ( any form ) with people of the same and opposite genders.... but bisexuals are people that are attracted to both genders..... so in a sense, you are a bicurious bisexual....and yes the feelings and desires and attractions can grow and ebb like a ocean tide.....

[UnknownEntity]

one thing, anal sex is not a staple of homosexual relations..... there are many gays that never have anal sex...... they enjoy oral sex and masturbation.... without anal sex

now I am similar to you is that having sex is not everything people crack it up to be..... I draw more enjoyment out of my partners enjoyment, the way they react etc... than sticking my dick in..... its not wrong, it means that you, like me are not drawn to sex or feel that sex is the be all to end all
its a form of empathic sensitivity, you are more sensitive to the * energy * of a person than the physical aspects....

ok, are you bisexual or bi curious..... well, bi curious are people that have never had sex ( any form ) with people of the same and opposite genders.... but bisexuals are people that are attracted to both genders..... so in a sense, you are a bicurious bisexual....and yes the feelings and desires and attractions can grow and ebb like a ocean tide.....

That was very informative, thank you for your response! I have never really thought about my sexual orientation over the years, I've just done what I felt natural, but I thought I should try to "define" exactly what I am. That does indeed make sense though, in a way I feel that I both can and can't hold a relationship with either gender based on many different factors. You know the feeling like when you're single, you can't seem to get your mind off potential relationship partners or past relationships, while when you're with someone, you can't stop wishing you were single? I feel the same way with men and women: When I'm fantasizing about a man, I can't help but think about how it couldn't work and how I want to be with a woman, but when I'm with a woman, I can't help but think about how my relationships with women always end in disaster and I'd be much better satisfied with a man. Ah, it's the circle of life.

Also, I should note that I have had sex with women, but haven't had any sexual experiences with men.

[wrzwldo69]

if i had any idea of what my sexuality was before 30, it was only because i had no idea at all

there is gender and then there is position..... our culture does not empower women to be the gender to state desire, they have it just as much

men who seek a partner who is definitive in their desire are left on the boundaries
wudi

[tenni]

Your lack of emotional involvement (love connection) with women may be affecting your perception about your attraction to women. If you have not "been in love" with a woman nor a man, that may come. Remember a lot of guys your age "brag" about sex and women and how great it was. Do not let their bravado diminish any valuation of your feelings.

Being with a guy may work for you now and you may not have any emotional connection as you do with women. You would still be a bisexual whether you have emotional attachment to a man though. Bisexuals have a very wide range of levels of sexual attraction or emotional attraction (romantic) for same and opposite genders.

Many men both bi and gay do not regularly if ever get into anal sex while others do. It is the attraction to same and opposite gender that factors in here. As has been posted, the actual level of attraction may vary over your life. At times you may have no same sex attraction.

From what you have posted, I would suggest that you are ready to go out and experience sex with a man. Take enough care though to pick a guy that you think is decent and considerate. You will find out if you enjoy it fairly quickly. Only do what you are comfortable with. Guys frequently negotiate their boundaries in casual sex situations before anything happens. Make sure to emphasize no anal. Meet in public first if you do not know him. Stay away from booze and drugs if you can so that you get a good understanding of any pleasure that you may be having.

Don't worry about giving yourself a label (straight, bi , gay) as much as determining what is pleasurable for you.

[wrzwldo69]

Take enough care though to pick a guy that you think is decent and considerate. You will find out if you enjoy it fairly quickly. Only do what you are comfortable with. Guys frequently negotiate their boundaries in casual sex situations before anything happens. Make sure to emphasize no anal. Meet in public first if you do not know him. Stay away from booze and drugs if you can so that you get a good understanding of any pleasure that you may be having.

Don't worry about giving yourself a label (straight, bi , gay) as much as determining what is pleasurable for you.

Just want to add tenni's note works, be safe, meet public first , avoid booze
no need to label

[citystyleguy]

...like people of any sexuality, take your time to know what you want, but more importantly, drop the sterotypical mindset of what is '...a standard...' for any orientation; as all sexual beings engage in the full range of sexual practices, it is for you and your partner(s) to decide what you want. it's pointless to put down another for what you erronouslly consider their standard.

as to your own orientation, don't be in such a hurry to determine a label, just relax and explore what your desires are, and more importantly, to whom you are drawn. later, if you must have a label, call yourself that which you are most comfortable, just don't say one thing, and practice something else.

good luck in your search of self!

[lovescum2]

Sorry but I don't mean to be flippant but I think your Bisexual, have you ever thought of a threesome with a couple, then you'd have the best of 2 worlds I'd think.

[**Peg**]

...What would you all consider me as?

young.

Forget the label (it's not imperative that you have a label), enjoy your life, wait a while... the answer will come to you.

[NEPHX]

I don't follow any of the gay stereotypes at all.....

....For one, I hate anal sex and would never engage in it, and that's a staple of homosexuality. Without anal sex, gays can't officially have sex with each other, so if I did have a relationship with a man, it would have to be sexless in that sense.

I'm still trying to decide whether I'm bisexual or bicurious, and whether I will continue to be more and more attracted to males. What would you all consider me as?

Datable.. ooops.. sorry :bigrin:

What you do or don't do or like doesn't need to define what label you chose to use. Check out the book "Best Little Boy In the World" by Andrew Tobias Writing as John Reid (at the time) and The Best Little Boy in the World Grow Up by Andrew Tobias. You'll appreciate his take on the topic of anal sex.

Also, you might check out and work through the Klein Sexual Orientation Grid (KSOG) to get a feel for sexual orientation. He has 7 variables in three time periods.

http://www.bisexual.org/kleingrid.html

A great definition that I like for bisexual is:

"I call myself bisexual because I acknowledge in myself the potential to be attracted, romantically and/or sexually, to people of more than one sex, not necessarily at the same time, not necessarily in the same way, and not necessarily to the same degree... I expect that this definition will change yet again, as I continue to learn."
Robyn Ochs; "Getting Bi, Voices of Bisexuals Around the World", 1st Ed. 2005

The term bi-curious is not generally considered a sexual orientation. To me, it means someone is curious if they would like having intimate/sexual involvement with a same-sex. Generally, people already have some attraction to the opposite sex or think they do/might. They could hate the "sex" part though depending on how one defines it.

Considering your attraction to the female body and male body, and the fluidity of sexual orientation, you cold float between 2/3 -> 5/6 in each variable over time dramatically or in small steps. The question is, which (if either) will you find that meets enough of all of your needs in the long-term. The answer could turn out to be neither or both, one or the other.... That seems to be a common dilemma for so many bi people:eek:.

[just4mefc]

None of OUR OPINIONS really matter.

From the American Psychological Association....

What Is Sexual Orientation?
Sexual orientation is an enduring emotional, romantic, sexual, or affectional attraction toward others. It is easily distinguished from other components of sexuality including biological sex, gender identity (the psychological sense of being male or female), and the social gender role (adherence to cultural norms for feminine and masculine behavior).

Sexual orientation exists along a continuum that ranges from exclusive heterosexuality to exclusive homosexuality and includes various forms of bisexuality. Bisexual persons can experience sexual, emotional, and affectional attraction to both their own sex and the opposite sex. Persons with a homosexual orientation are sometimes referred to as gay (both men and women) or as lesbian (women only).

Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors.

So go explore who you are, you might find same sex is not for you at all or that it is an incredible experience. Then if you find a need to label yourself, go on ahead. Perhaps you will join those here who label ourselves as "me-sexuals". But whatever label you do or do not adopt you will find someone here who feels exactly the same way. We are an incredibly diverse group and no one label will ever truly apply to all of us.

[MrBisex]

First of all I do not like to categorize people I think it is silly, gay, bisexual, straight or whatever. You are who you are.

But ok if we have to use a category I would say you are bisexual. My point of view is you do not need to like anal sex or cuttle with a guy to be bisexual.

Sucking and licking cum might be enough, and if you like a woman at the same time I am sure that a threesome would be fun. :tongue:

[ndnookie]

I love looking at attractive women and don't find myself looking at men at all. Except for their cock. I think I've always been a curious person. I always used to take things apart to see how they work. But what got me changing was this:
Women are built for sex. They can have multiple orgasms. I love the look and smell of women and wondered what was it like to be inside their body feeling what they feel. Got me wondering what it felt like to suck a cock. Or to feel one thrusting into my body.
Women are extremely desirable. I want to be desirable for sex too. So it got me fantasizing about what it would be like to be a woman, or dress as a woman. To just let a guy look up my skirt knowing I had made him want me.
So things just progressed to wanting to try oral with a guy. But never kiss. But now I've progressed to not caring about that. Funny how we think that kissing is more personal then sucking a cock. But now I'm willing to do both. Maybe even try .... I wonder .... Anyway that's how my thoughts progressed to being here.

[BI BOYTOY]

ya id stop the stereo type to since im a truck driver, a bi one. and i dont act straight eather. so you never know. just be tue to your self and dont listen to socioty. shawn and good luck,, oh ya i think you are bi-sexual but you are ultamatly the only one that matters.:bipride:

[UnknownEntity]

After reading all your messages, I realized I don't think I belong here. At least not yet. I have some inner searching to do before I can choose what kind of lifestyle I want to be living. Not that I don't appreciate the feedback, and I'm sure you all are great people. Thanks for all the responses.

[just4mefc]

After reading all your messages, I realized I don't think I belong here. At least not yet. I have some inner searching to do before I can choose what kind of lifestyle I want to be living. Not that I don't appreciate the feedback, and I'm sure you all are great people. Thanks for all the responses.

If you have questions or curiosities, you certainly do belong here! Few of us "always" knew we were bisexual so we can offer a significant experience and support base as you answer these questions. Whether you stay or go, I wish you well in your journey of self discovery :)