life changes

[53JMAN]

I am a happily married man for 32 yrs. have 3 grown children. My wife and I have had good sex together. The past several years have been pretty seldom. I tend to masturbate on a regular basis between our lovemaking. It has become a very ritualistic event with her giving me oral while she vibrates herself.
Well, to make a long story short. When I was in high school(early 70's) I had a samesex relationship with a close friend of mine. We both enjoyed it very much. But, after HS, we went our different ways. I haven't talked to him about it for many, many years. Lately, I have been getting those feelings back. My wife would has no idea I feel this way.

[redone]

I am a happily married man for 32 yrs. have 3 grown children. My wife and I have had good sex together. The past several years have been pretty seldom. I tend to masturbate on a regular basis between our lovemaking. It has become a very ritualistic event with her giving me oral while she vibrates herself.
Well, to make a long story short. When I was in high school(early 70's) I had a samesex relationship with a close friend of mine. We both enjoyed it very much. But, after HS, we went our different ways. I haven't talked to him about it for many, many years. Lately, I have been getting those feelings back. My wife would has no idea I feel this way.

email me

redone53@hotmail.com

[chick_a_dee]

Somehow I can relate in many ways.

[mikey3000]

Dude, That's why you're here. Many of us can relate to your story. Just feel free to talk it out here. Believe me, we all understand completely.

[csrakate]

I am a happily married man for 32 yrs. have 3 grown children. My wife and I have had good sex together. The past several years have been pretty seldom. I tend to masturbate on a regular basis between our lovemaking. It has become a very ritualistic event with her giving me oral while she vibrates herself.
Well, to make a long story short. When I was in high school(early 70's) I had a samesex relationship with a close friend of mine. We both enjoyed it very much. But, after HS, we went our different ways. I haven't talked to him about it for many, many years. Lately, I have been getting those feelings back. My wife would has no idea I feel this way.

What you are going through is not unusual...I am sure you'll find many men at this site in your same situation. BUT...let me make one suggestion as to your sexual relationship with your wife, if I may.

Sounds as if the two of you are in a bit of a rut sexually. Believe me...I understand. You call your sex life "ritualistic" and mention that she has to vibrate herself as she gives you oral...sounds like she may have issues reaching orgasm....But what you may not understand is that a woman's body sometimes plays tricks on her as she ages and it sometimes can be difficult to achieve orgasm the traditional way. I encourage you to talk to your wife about working together as a couple to "spice things up" a bit...exploring each other...taking time to give one another pleasure...things don't have to be so routine and mundane....talk to each other, PLEASE....be honest without being hurtful....it may make things easier for you both.

As for the resurgence of your bisexual urges, I hope you can find a way to come to terms with them....Maybe if you two can be honest about the sex between the two of you, you can open the door for her to understand the urges you are experiencing lately....just a possibility of what open and honest communication can offer.

Good wishes to you both....

Kate

[onewhocares]

What you are going through is not unusual...I am sure you'll find many men at this site in your same situation. BUT...let me make one suggestion as to your sexual relationship with your wife, if I may.

Sounds as if the two of you are in a bit of a rut sexually. Believe me...I understand. You call your sex life "ritualistic" and mention that she has to vibrate herself as she gives you oral...sounds like she may have issues reaching orgasm....But what you may not understand is that a woman's body sometimes plays tricks on her as she ages and it sometimes can be difficult to achieve orgasm the traditional way. I encourage you to talk to your wife about working together as a couple to "spice things up" a bit...exploring each other...taking time to give one another pleasure...things don't have to be so routine and mundane....talk to each other, PLEASE....be honest without being hurtful....it may make things easier for you both.

As for the resurgence of your bisexual urges, I hope you can find a way to come to terms with them....Maybe if you two can be honest about the sex between the two of you, you can open the door for her to understand the urges you are experiencing lately....just a possibility of what open and honest communication can offer.

Good wishes to you both....

Kate

I must agree with Kate. As we age and have been with our partner for many years there can be a stagnation that occurs. I have always tried to avoid that with making sure our lovemaking....between my bi/gay husband and is always new and exciting. Introduction of toys, fantasy play, and many more options which can bring you closer. Only you can determine how much you want to share with your wife your feelings and desires to be with a man. Perhaps you underestimate your wife and she may surprise you and support your desire to be with a man. I know I did....and it changed my world.

Belle