sprite
Jan 9, 2010, 12:36 PM
Not to steal Still Shy's thunder, but her post prompts me as the spouse of the bi-partner to ask: how can/does the partner of the bi-mate manage/cope with this lack of desire for them?
Some background: yes we are in an open relationship and I consider myself bi/poly but my desire for those of the opposite sex or for other partners in general is not nearly the same desire/need he has for a male.
I do notice it to be cyclic; that is there are times when his need for men is great; but lately it has been really pervasive and intrusive. We have always had a great sex life, and I had no trouble pleasing him before. And he is still very attentive to me. But as the spouse who is accustomed to always being able to turn on their partner, how do you deal with the emotions, the 'rejection' when you're not the one he wants?
I have a female lover and an occasional male lover. But I don't see how 'collecting'/ having other lovers really solves anything. I don't think it can be solved, just managed; How does one manage? So many of you have gone through this - I know their is wisdom out there! :) Thanks!
Some background: yes we are in an open relationship and I consider myself bi/poly but my desire for those of the opposite sex or for other partners in general is not nearly the same desire/need he has for a male.
I do notice it to be cyclic; that is there are times when his need for men is great; but lately it has been really pervasive and intrusive. We have always had a great sex life, and I had no trouble pleasing him before. And he is still very attentive to me. But as the spouse who is accustomed to always being able to turn on their partner, how do you deal with the emotions, the 'rejection' when you're not the one he wants?
I have a female lover and an occasional male lover. But I don't see how 'collecting'/ having other lovers really solves anything. I don't think it can be solved, just managed; How does one manage? So many of you have gone through this - I know their is wisdom out there! :) Thanks!