the sounds lovers make during sex...gender differences?

[AchingBlossom]

This is something that has been bugging me for a while and I would like to discuss with other people who have experience with both sexes.

While having sex, do women tend to make more vocalizations of pleasure than men? Do they have longer, more intense orgasms? Are they more demonstrative in expressing their pleasure, with facial expressions, gestures and noises?

This has been bugging me, because I really expect more expressiveness from men than I have gotten from most of them. A couple of my male lovers, I could barely even tell they were having an orgasm!

One of these men told me that even though he doesn’t vocalize much, it doesn’t mean he’s not enjoying himself. It’s just that he had to train himself to jerk off quietly when in the dorms (15 years ago!). Well, I did the same thing in college, but it didn’t permanently harm my ability to vocalize sounds of pleasure.

Is anyone else besides me disappointed when your lover is so unexpressive when you’re making love to them? I guess that’s a separate question!

[Apleasureseeker]

This is actually really interesting. Gives me an idea for a separate post, but I will say that men and women's bodies respond differently to their own arousal, and their breathing reflects that. For what it's worth, breath control gives a person incredible control over htier own orgasm, and their lover as well. One thing that almost everyone who's ever had sex with me knows is that I insist "I want to hear your breath" If they get too quiet, I stop (obedience is a virtue, I think). Both males and females will come much more strongly if you coach their breathng during sex, and you get much more feedback into what's pleasuring them if you can hear the breath.

[Apleasureseeker]

A few more thoughts: Guys, especially young ones, don;t make enough noise, and they also can't come as freely of thoroughly. I learned as a young manipulative fucker that girls responded much more strongly if I was loud during sex and orgasm, and I discovered that the orgasms were also better with longer, heavier ejaculations, too. Girls with strong, healthy orgasms are usually pretty loud, or at least heavy breathers.

[sexxxpot0690]

I too trained myself to jackoff quietly.I was always iterested in why women seem to make.But i started being more vocal when i became comfertable with taking a dick.How can you not make a lil noise when you have 8 inchs pushed up in you.My rehabilation is coming nicely.

[Hephaestion]

Beds, cupboards, bedsteads banging against walls. Creaking tables

"Scream", "owoow", "eek", "aah", "fuck me harder", "you bastard", "Yes", "God", "Geronimo" would all appear to be synonyms and available to both men and women in any combination.

Plastic chains help but there appears to be no way of suppressing follow on whimpering - gagged or no, resulting from whipping, branding or use the of spurs. These also have characteristic noises such as "whitchoo - thwack", "psisss", "ka-ching ka-ching" and are also available to both men and women. Rubber makes it's own noises dpending on presence or absence of lube ("Eeeurk" when dry and "phweeet" when wet)

On climax, it is not possible to fart during anal sex but it is so during vaginal sex and is thus a female only prerogative. This is sometimes initiated by a "fuck me till I fart" order. Men get their own back afterwards and then up the stakes with belching and snoring.

The noise "Urgh - what the hell's died up there?" often results from a fart during oral (both genders).

Hmm!

[rissababynta]

All of the guys that I've been with that didn't make much noise later told me they were a little embarassed to really let lose like that. My husband included. But now, he's loud as hell. It's a shame that a lot of guys are like this though because it usually turns the partner on much more to hear them groaning or moaning, because you know for a fact that they are enjoying it and that you are making them feel good. But oh well.

As for who makes more noise and stuff, I think that women are probably the noisey ones from the start and the guys are noisey after they get used to the situation. All I know is that my next door neighboy has never mentioned hearing me during sex...but my husband? Yeah, they've heard him almost everytime LOL.

[TheDream]

I know for a fact that I sound cheesy when I cum and that kind of puts me off from vocalizing my orgasm... I just know that something stupid would come out and I'm conscious about that. I feel the difference in orgasm between men and women also has its part to play though. A womans orgasm is much more intense that a mans which probably leads to uncontrollable vocalization... With a guy his orgasm is more of a satisfaction feeling which doesn't really make you blurt anything out... At leasts that's how I am (and I know many men are the same, just like your BF).

[Realist]

My ex was so quiet that I never knew if she had an orgasm, or had just gone to sleep! I was thinking it was my fault. When I ask her why she didn't say anything, she'd say everything was good; there was no need to say anything! Frustrating!

Her thoughts were, that I should know what she needs and do it without having to be told. My GF, however, really lets me know what she likes and there's no doubt when she's "going over the hill". It's a good thing that I live in the country! Happily, most lovers I've had were very open to letting me know how they felt.

The last guy I with was quiet, too. We didn't last long.

I enjoy knowing that my partner is feeling good and if there's anything else they'd like. Everyone's different. I enjoy pleasing as much as getting pleased.....maybe it's even more, since I'm older. When they are vociferous, it makes it even better.

[12voltman59]

I really don't think the gender of those who are quiet or noisy during sex matters--I think it has more to do with the attitudes and such a person was imbued with regarding sex when growing up.

I know that when I was younger--I was a bit reticent too about getting too enthusiastic when having sex--having been brought up Catholic and all of that---once I realized that I was fornicating and God didn't strike me down with a lightening strike---I figured I might as well enjoy it!!!

I think that to really enjoy it--you do need to just "let it rip" and get noisy--I know I find sex much more fun when both me and a partner get a bit loud.

It kinda pisses me off with some "gay porn" where the guy giving another one is really enjoying giving a blow job--and doing a damn fine job of it too--and the one getting it is hardly even recognizing he is getting one great bj!!!

I don't understand that attitude that you are somehow supposed to be indifferent to someone giving you head---that is a great thing to get!!!

When I see one of those types of vids-I just turn the damn thing off---I like it when both parties are "getting into it!"

I say--when you have sex---maybe shut your window or something--so the neighbors don't hear---but get loud and proud--enjoy "getting sexed!!" whether you are giving or recieving!!:bigrin:

:tong::tong:

[*pan*]

hmmmm, this topic covers a lot of ground, will try to make it short.
have had woman that are very loud, have had woman that i had to ask if they got off, lol. men on the other hand mostly are quiet and i am being general. hearing a moan and facial expressions when they cum , some mostly smile most of the time. the woman seem more serious faced kind of senous with thoes eyes that say they are in love. ect... different strokes for different folks, i tend to moan while having anal sex and when i cumit is so hard sometimes it scares people as i thrust against them ans then collapse after i cum from it being so exuasting. i have fucked men and they just moan a little same with some woman. have fucked some that were loude like watching a porno llol. depends on the inividual i guess and how hot it is. lol
one thing to keep in mind is that the sounds dont always represent how good you are doing or how good they are feeling. some just dont make much noise lol

[innaminka]

Sorry to upset your applecart, but from my experience with both sexes (probably way too many, but what's a girl to do??)
...... if there was a pattern, it was that the majority of women seem to just pant, gasp a little or really say nothing:
....whereas most men do vocalise or at least grunt. There tended to be a pattern there too...... :bigrin: "the smaller the penis, the louder the vocalisation, as if voice was compensating for his perceived lack of "manhood."

... (when will guys learn .... it - size - doesn't matter. Not a bit to a woman.)

[Lisa (va)]

[QUOTE=Realist;149089]My ex was so quiet that I never knew if she had an orgasm, or had just gone to sleep! I was thinking it was my fault. When I ask her why she didn't say anything, she'd say everything was good; there was no need to say anything! Frustrating!

Her thoughts were, that I should know what she needs and do it without having to be told.


I have to so disagree with her, talking has got to be the most underated thing in a great relationship ( sexual or otherwise ). More than happy to let my partner know what I like and what I don't like, makes it better for both of us.


Lisa

hugs n kisses

[_Joe_]

TURTLE SEX! is the best sounding sex EVER (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6R5QueuvKQ4)

[mikey3000]

For me I find women to be a tad louder and high piched vocally during sex. But the men, it much more deeper, guttural, animalistic sounds. Their grunting and groaning is a huge turn on for me.

[Jackal]

A few more thoughts: Guys, especially young ones, don;t make enough noise, and they also can't come as freely of thoroughly. I learned as a young manipulative fucker that girls responded much more strongly if I was loud during sex and orgasm, and I discovered that the orgasms were also better with longer, heavier ejaculations, too. Girls with strong, healthy orgasms are usually pretty loud, or at least heavy breathers.

I've never been with an older guy, just ones my own age, but you're fucking right. I like man noises, I like to know he's having a good time, let me know! Apparently a lot of women want their men to be quiet, and I don't know why. The noises are part of the sex and arousal for me, I keep encouraging more noises. As long as they aren't goofy.

[citystyleguy]

as having been with both genders; men are either as quiet as the grave or are yellers, the women, different each one them!

[jem_is_bi]

I have not been with a lot of women or men. Maybe, it would be better to ask those such as Tiger Woods that may contribute more to the numbers needed for statistical significance.
But, the partners that I have had, I had no trouble determining their state of sexual arousal even if not extremely vocal. Especially, with my present lover, I can judge by the subtle sounds and moans, state of erection, firmness of his sack, position of his body, feet and arms, and loving touching of me, exactly where he is on the continuum to orgasmic ecstasy.

ME? I scream!! Ooooooooooh GOD!!!!!!!!!!! I SCREAM!!!!!

[roy m cox]

i'v been told by both sexes that i moan and some time squeal at a good orgasm ,,,

my boy friend i have now loves it when i squeal he thinks its cute when i do that :tongue:

[smartsexychick]

I did this as a lark, really, but my Luv at the time was really into it. Someone I was close to this past summer I met online (we are no longer close as, long story short, I made him want to leave his wife, the mother of his preteen son, because I loved and accepted all of him, including that he is bi, and he just could not reconcile all of it with his Southern-Baptist, Ivy-League-law-school graduate guilt). He was very deeply a voyeur and he loved the idea of other men listening to me cum as he used to do. He asked me if I would post, and another erotic friend who loved listening to me was into this as well. This really has more of a masculine sensibility. Most of the time with men, real and phone, I am pretty loud and it is very definitively feminine, sweet but powerful. Here, I didn't focus on any particular person when I made this recording, just on pleasing me and really just letting go, giving birth to release as if it were another whole entity springing forth from me. It is VERY primal, mountain gorilla, and some men thought it was a turn off because it is not all delicate and sugar cookies and pink lipstick. This is about fucking. This is about something completely unashamedly confident and fiercely naked in daylight and not giving a damned about being all perfectly groomed and freshly showered and smelling of lilacs in places they could not possibly exist. This is about pleasing him with all of me and being bodily committed to his pleasure and mine, of desperately wanting his cum deep inside me like I will starve without it. This is about the safety and the sanctuary of a personal space where only he and I exist. It is about acceptance and it is about an extraordinary kind of love, a love that says, I couldn't possibly be more yours than I am right now.

Turn down the volume. You'll want to blow your load, not your speakers.

http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=433135

[Karasel]

I myself are a pretty vocal person, I groan and pant/breathe heavy. But I've had a very close friends with benefits and we liked to have sex in pretty risque places and had to be quite as a grave, I can be be if I have to.. Other than that I make a lot of noise.. The men I've been with have all been quite, except one, who groaned a lot.. He was my favorite.

The girls I had liked to moan or at least do something.. Never had one to be quiet.

[quiet1fornow]

OK...my nick is pretty much true to me in both my socialization in face to face and sensual enjoyment. I am and have always been reserved...so I have the tendency to be not so noisy at first and then as time marches on and familiarity increase som do the responces either vocal, visual or physically!

I for one like any responses....vocal is very nice...but when you sense the body of your partner going into that out of control place of pleasure and you helped them on that road....WoW! The Sensing of pleasure is the key for me...from start to finish!

Q:cool: