What do you do if you're feeling a little "down"

[rupertbare]

Because of my present personal difficulties I am very aware that I am feeling "down in the dumps".

So to cheer myself up I went out today and purchased a LARGE bar of plain (dark) chocolate and two DVD box sets.

"The Hugh Grant Collection" (only just released in the UK) featuring the three films "Notting Hill"; "About the Boy" and "Love Actually" - all of them being in the genre of "light romantic comedy drama". It is "odd" that my wife has spent months saying that I am not a "real man" - I guess a "real man" (whatever one of those are??!!!) wouldn't be caught dead buying those for himself!!! lol!! :)

and "Baz Luhrmann's Red Curtain Trilogy" consisting of "Moulin Rouge"; "William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet"; and "Strictly Ballroom" - a movie I have never seen before.

So tonight I'm gonna curl up on the sofa, bar of chocolate and a soft monkey my youngest daughter gave to me as a present by my side and watch a couple of them!!

So, I'm wondering, how do others cope with those rather horrid "down" days?

love and peace to you all

Rupe, London, UK :)

[Driver 8]

It is "odd" that my wife has spent months saying that I am not a "real man" - I guess a "real man" (whatever one of those are??!!!) wouldn't be caught dead buying those for himself!!! lol!! :)
If you want to prove you're a real man, you could post some pictures of your penis in your profile. Works for 90% of the guys here.

Alternatively, you could cope with down days by hanging around the forum being a smartass.

[rumple4skin]

What I do when I am feeling down varies but it usually goes along the line of changing my perspective and not dwelling on the situation that has me down.

There are many different tools that I use to help me cope. The tool itself does not matter as much as the decision to use a tool and the effort I put into it.

Some days all I need is a little harmless escape like watching a movie. Other days I need to talk to someone. Other days I just take the bike out for a ride. Sometimes just telling my self that there is nothing I can do about a situation right now and putting it aside helps. Sometimes realizing what I can do about a situation and doing it is all that I need to cheer myself up.

I was chatting with someone about a Cherokee proverb yesterday that I often think about and find strength in. I have copied it here.


An elderly Cherokee was teaching his grandchildren about life...
He said to them, 'A fight is going on inside of me.' It is a terrible fight, and it is between two wolves.

One wolf is evil---he is fear, anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed,
arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride,
competition, superiority, and ego.

The other is good--- he is joy, peace, love, hope, sharing, serenity,
humility, kindness, benevolence, friendship, empathy, generosity, truth,
compassion, patience and faith.

The same fight is going on inside every other person.

His grandchildren thought about this for a minute, then one child asked,
'which wolf will win, Grandfather?'

The old Cherokee replied softly, 'The one you feed.'

I do not know if that helps at all. I hope it does. It helps me remind myself that other people feed the wrong wolf and while I may not like when that over flows into my life that does not mean I have to feed the negativity inside of me.
Peace and Love to you,
Rumple

[rupertbare]

If you want to prove you're a real man, you could post some pictures of your penis in your profile. Works for 90% of the guys here
?????? what works for them?

But no Driver, that's really not my style - and I don't have a magnifying lens on my camera!!

This wasn't intended as a "serious" thread - just something light-hearted.
I was thinking of those days when the cat messes on your favourite aunt's best dress or the boss shouts at you for being late, again?!!

Those kinda "down" days!

Not sure that showing my penis in a Public Profile would help!!! Might get a laugh though!!

And Rumple they showed a children's TV program recently in the UK where an old Native American told exactly that story - it's cool!! It is indeed "the wolf you feed".

love and peace

Rupe :)

[Driver 8]

?????? what works for them?
I am feeling a great need to overexplain today ...

I've often wondered why so many guys here post those penis-only pics, especially the grainy webcam shots. I've always assumed it just does something for some guys, or maybe all guys, that it doesn't do for me.

But when I read your post I felt that a great mystery had been revealed: they're proving they're Real Men! It all makes sense now!

(And by "hanging around the forum being a smartass," I meant "... like I do," not that that's what you're doing.)

[meteast chick]

Oh, Driver, you hit the nail on the head...OH OUCH!
It seems as if the women here like to play and banter
but the men are just in it for the sex
I know that's not always the case,
so take it for what you want.

As far as how I cope...hmmm...that sure is close to home.
I am a natural born brooder.
I spend too much time letting things sink in until they're
barely recognizable anymore.
I cannot recommend this for anyone, it's just my personality.

Rupert, best of luck to you.
I think we both need it right now.

kisses xoxoxo
meteast

[csrakate]

Rupert,
When I am really down...when I feel overwhelmed, I often "take to the sofa" with the Lifetime Channel playing in the background as I spend hours on end sleeping and moping. By doing so, I tend to remain down, I certainly frustrate those around me, and I never accomplish anything more than wasting a great deal of productive time that could have been spent trying to deal with the issues at hand. But...that doesn't mean that a litte "me" time would be a waste either...a time to sit back and relax...eat a little chocolate...read a trashy novel...listen to some mellow music...or just sitting there "stroking my weenie" which I find to be most relaxing of all. (LOL...inside joke to some..but my "weenie" is my beloved Miniature Dachshund who always seems to know when I am down and faithfully sits by my side to make me feel better. LOL!)


Oh, Driver, you hit the nail on the head...OH OUCH!
It seems as if the women here like to play and banter
but the men are just in it for the sex
I know that's not always the case,
so take it for what you want


Meteast...I must step up in defense of our male counterparts, however. There are more than enough women that come here only to seek sex and attention of a sexual nature and they do so by posting provocative pics that very often I find difficult to believe are really and truly pics of themselves. I think we have an equal amount of men who come to this site to play and banter as well.

Hugs,
Kate

[nubiwoman]

Hey Rupe....

I love 'Strictly Ballroom'.... deliciously camp and just perfect for those 'down' days...

enjoy your evening :bigrin:

Julie xx

[Driver 8]

I love 'Strictly Ballroom'.... deliciously camp and just perfect for those 'down' days...
Anyone who loved Strictly Ballroom might also check out Shall We Dance? I haven't seen the re-make with Richard Gere, but the original Japanese film was hilarious - and very touching.

[Newmexicanman]

A child declared to me about two years ago, after she had buckled her seatbelt and inserted a dvd into the overhead dvd player in the back of my trusty minivan, "My dad says real men don't drive minivans!" I turned to look at her and said, simply, "Oh..."

Do real men slap each other on the ass (arse) on the sidelines of a football game? Do real men slap their wives around to show them who is in charge? Do real men help their wives with the housework, or take kids to school, or put a load of washing into the machine, or be good at baking? What constitutes a "real man"? I, personally, have no clue...

I do know, however, that there are men with whom much can be shared, with whom tenderness, love, concern and, yes, even sex can be shared, and they sure look and feel like real men to me. Equally, I know women who can handle a circular saw with the best of them, ride powerful motorcycles, do damned fine work on a car in need of repair, and still have time to put washing in the machine, tuck the kids into bed, and then make beautiful and passionate love to their husbands... Are they real women? Well, they sure seem that way to me...

Rupert, you are a real man in every sense of the word. You are a man who loves unconditionally, grieves for his losses, and puts out a hand for help - either to give it or receive it. I have talked to you at some length, and you are definitely a man I would be proud to know either here, in this ethereal electronic world, or out there where flesh presses flesh...

In short, Rupert, you are the epitomy of a "real man."

[maslowstudent]

Rupert,

When I'm feeling a "little down", (not like I wish I could be fitted for coffin and never have to think about moving again), my favorite coping method is to make a pot of Rotel dip, put on a terrific old movie like "All About Eve," "Lifeboat", or "Harvey", then sit on the floor over a towel (so I don't have to worry about getting cheese dip on the carpet) and snuggle with my dog, Sophie.

As for "what is a real man," I think it's one who doesn't feel obligated to refrain from ANY simple, innocent pleasure that makes him a happier person to be around. NONE of us are invincible, in spite of our perculiar social proddings to be so. Part of being human is recognizing your LACK of omnipotence - which is simply part of appreciating the nature of the human condition. Have you ever noticed that when someone you care about confides in you about a struggle or weakness or pain that they're dealing with, you sorta feel like you've never loved them more? When someone shows me their vulnerabilties, on purpose and in trust, it makes me feel like I'm someone I want to be. And I'm very grateful to them for trusting me.

Just some thoughts.

Maslow

[mrplayfuluk]

its simple.. I get lost in music. the ipod is not just for the bus or the street its also for bed. I have a 60Gb version and have nearly every one of my favourite albums and songs on there. So I lie back under my duvet and play at being my own cerebral dj, jumping from Coltrane to The Clash or Gillian Welch to Otis.. and drift off... By the time I come around I realise things aren't so bad because as long as I have music, I have an embarrassment of riches and my sanity intact. Peace.

[red_riding_hood_27]

I love the movie "Love Actually" and the Bridget Jones Diary (1 & 2). Watch all of those sick love movies.. As you know my love affair with oreo's but combine that with a peporoni (sp) pizza and a large bottle of Dr Pepper. And I have it made with a blanket, pillow and the couch. Sit and watch them shows. Oh the joy!


Then the next day get a whole new hair cut. To make myslef look and feel pretty.

I don't know if that would work for you (lol)

Take care
Angela

[cassie]

When I am down I call my best friend. He can lift my spirits and make me feel good.

I don't know what I would do without him.

[arana]

When I'm down I tend to curl up and hybernate or I get in a nostalgic mood and drown myself in music.

[wanderingrichard]

yeh, what she said.. and i toss in wine and chocolates too..

[ambi53mm]

I've often wondered why so many guys here post those penis-only pics, especially the grainy webcam shots. I've always assumed it just does something for some guys, or maybe all guys, that it doesn't do for me.



As founder of the National Association for Penis Pride also know as NAPP we tend to see it as putting your best foot forward so to speak. Letting it all hang out in all it's glory is a way of saying "Hey..I've got a penis and I'm proud"! During the couse of a given day..We like to give it a little rub of appreciation also known as "checking one's self" as a small gesture of pride and possession. We realize that not everyone has a penis but are flattered that the dildo and strapon are available to those want to "share in the experience "..in a some what limited way. When I see a pic of a penis online it's like someone saying "Check this baby out". and I know the deep rooted feeling of pride and ownership felt by my brothers...it's a guy thing :male:

Ambi :)

[TinTin]

great set of movies I'm sure you'll enjoy that.
A solitary bottle of good Chamapgne always gets me back into the joy of things, although chocolate always works too.
Good luck

[m.in.heels&hose]

Hey there Rupe!
Arana pinned it down for me, (please note, i am a huge fan of older automobiles) i drown myself in nostaligia as well, i will put 50's 60's or 70's genre music on and build a model of the corrosponding music i am listening to, and submerge myself into my own little "fantasy world" where no one (not even gina) can penetrate!
And the only time i come out is whebn i feel i need to ask a question (usually about the model im building) like "do these colors go together", or "what do you think about this"

but after reading some of the posts here, i think i need to see "strictly ballroom"

(much to the surprise of arana) she knows how i am when it comes to a movie i have never seen (i am not a "movie" person) LOL

thanks for listening to me ramble here, and i hope you are feeling better soon rupe!!!


HUGS & more HUGS
m.in.heels&hose

[WillowTree]

One of my favorite pick me up rituals has always been nice, long and hot bath in the dark with a candle lit and 'Air Supply' playing in the background.

[Driver 8]

One of my favorite pick me up rituals has always been nice, long and hot bath in the dark with a candle lit and 'Air Supply' playing in the background.
*recommends the waterproof Water Dancer vibrator*

[PeterH]

Hi Rupert, everybody.
I saw Strictly ballroom back in 1993 when I studied in England for three months. Saw it with two friends and we laughed our heads off. This was partly because one of the main characters looked like an opera singer we all hated, so we interpreted it as a parody on him as well. I saw it a second time on tv and didn't like it that much... dunno why.
When I feel down, I stay in bed, sulk eat lots of sweets, do loads of inproductive stuff (seemingy anyway). But then, I found out that my mind seems to need time to relax, and often after some time (up to 2 weeks) I come up with new answers, new energy, new ideas and I can keep running for a long time.
I liked the old Indian story, btw, and I love Notting Hill, saw it at least 6 times. I went to see Bridget Jones 1 with a male friend, and have read Bridget 2 and saw it with 3 friends (MFF) as part of a chocolate and chicklit party. It was great (well, the movie was, anyway). I also read Pride and prejudice and watched the tv series did both several times. I just love a good romantic story.
Am I a real man??? Uhmmm, probably not according to those standards.
Point is: would I want to be a 'real' man???? :rolleyes:
I've met a few, and too be honest, I wouldn't want to see one in the mirror every day.

[usedbear1950]

Rupertbare,
When u find a "real" man...point him out to me.
There was a woman who was in the US Congress named Milicent Fenwick. She had more balls than most men I know. So it aint chutzpah.
We've all heard of mothers who have lifted cars to save their babies. So it aint strength.
There's the bearded lady in the circus. So it aint testosterone.
Maybe, just maybe...a real man is someone who tries to feed the good wolf and starve the bad one. (Credits to my pal rumple).
When ur down wallow in it a little. Be lazy, binge, listen to music, watch the telly...if ur head is really hooked on str8 u'll get so sick and tired of ur slothfulness u'll come out of it.
Meteast...I came here for sex and I found friends...aint serendipity wonderful

ur ever luvin
usedbear

Oh and watch "Bye, Bye Birdie" and sing along with 'Put On A Happy Face'

[APMountianMan]

What do I do? A little Bourbon, a little chocolate, a good movie or a good book, a gourmet meal, heat from the wood burner, attempting writing, a slow massage, some cursing and swearing, a bit of quiet time, slow sex, a good night's sleep, a walk in the woods, petting the dog, stroking the cat, and then... realizing that life is life; there are some good days, some bad days, and some great days. Life goes on, and if I desire better there is always tomorrow.

:cool:

[Newmexicanman]

Hey Rupert!

My favorite thing to do when I feel down is to hit the highway on my motorcycle. I like to fly on it, let myself get a heavy dose of whiteline fever.

Other than that? Be with people I care about, eat something I really enjoy, or sip on a very light red wine with a plate filled with cut fruit, good fresh bread and my favorite cheeses. The latter while reposing in a hot bath, laced with a scent I like.

Still, though, you cannot beat going somewhere different. Amazing what new scenery can do... And all those new people too...

[JohnnyV]

So, I'm wondering, how do others cope with those rather horrid "down" days?

love and peace to you all

Rupe, London, UK :)


Rupert,

I usually come onto this website and ramble when I'm feeling down. With alcohol in my system, if necessary. If that doesn't work, quite honestly, I watch porn. Good luck! Since I'm in one of my up moods, I'm trying only to let myself come onto the site for 10 minutes a week.... Oh God! My time is almost up!

Love,
J :rolleyes: