how do i tell them

[woodstockloner]

how do i tell my family im bi?

[Realist]

Why tell them?

Do they really need to know?

How will they react if they know?

Only you know the answer, but if telling them is going to be detrimental to your relationship with them, they're probably better off NOT knowing.

Why would anyone need to know, other than your lovers, potential lovers, or most intimate/trusted friends?

[Brad_Palm_Bay]

Advertising your sexual orientation to ANY 'group' (however large or small) can do absolutely NOTHING but sabotage your own life. Please note that I am NOT talking about participation on special-interest boards like this one -- thats an entirely different situation.

Most of the folks you will encounter in-person over the course of your lifetime have their own, cherished INTERNAL beliefs & labels for EVERYTHING that touches their life. No matter how erroneous, misguided or Not-Even-Wrong these little 'labels' are, they have a tendency to become the Gospel Truth of confused little minds.

Please note that this happy accident is something you should take ADVANTAGE of -- or, "Let Sleeping Dogs Lie".

Brad

[leredacteur]

As I have many times before, I again pose the question, "why do you want to 'come out' to your parents ?" Why the compulsion to discuss your sexuality with them ?
Have they ever regaled you with tales of their sexual relations and tastes ? Do they ask you to tell them about your sexual exploits ?
The rule of thumb is, "Your FUCKING business is none of your parents' fucking BUSINESS !"
I've been actively bi for nearly 60 years now, although inactive for the last decade. The only people with whom I share my bisexuality are my partners, one of my doctors and my lawyer (for estate purposes).
My co-workers, relatives, neighbors and non-sexual friends are not aware of my bisexuality because IT IS NOT THEIR BUSINESS !
Nor, I suggest, is it your parents' business. You will not enlighten, inform or enrich your parents' lives by telling them about your bisexuality; rather, you will probably concern, worry and perhaps frighten them.
If they should accidentally find out about your bisexuality, so be it; you can acknowledge it to them, IF THEY ASK. But don't INFLICT the information on them; They don't need to know.
Don't torture yourself worrying about how you're going to do something that you don't have to do. Enjoy your enlightened and rich sexual life. Permit yourself to feel smug because your openmindedness and openheartedness allow you to experience a range of sexual pleasure that most people do not and cannot.

[SaraSaurus]

I thought I'd add my two cents because so far everyone is telling you not to bother talking to your parents. I'm not going to say they're wrong, every person's situation is different, but their views are only one side of the coin.

I felt the need to tell my family and so I did. Not because it was any of their business but because its a part of who I am and I wanted them to know. I'd also like to point out that I come from a semi-conservative christian family and there is no one in my family extended or otherwise who is of alternative sexuality so it wasn't an easy decision to come out.

It was scary and took me over six months to work up the courage. As to how I told them, I didn't make a big deal of it. Just told them that I'm attracted to girls as well as guys and that it didn't change who I was. I found it helped when I let them know what I expected of them. That they didn't have to understand (cause honesty how could they?), only continue to love me as they always have. It was hard and emotional but for me it was totally worth it if for no other reason than that I now know my parents love me despite my sexuality.

So yeah, there's my advice, hope it helps :bigrin: :2cents:

[roy m cox]

i think my mom knew i was but id never tell my dad he's the sor'ta dad you just don't tell things like loving guy and girls at the same time :eek: he would kill me or brother to str8t and he's bigger than me :eek:

id just not tell unless you feel OK about :)