Pretty sure Im a lesbian now!

[JessyRee]

OK so no I didnt just wake up and decide Im a lesbian...Im married and have 2 children..I used to be attracted to my husband but I find now that Im almost only attracted to women.I love him so I dont plan to leave him and he is allowing me to have a girlfriend because he doesnt consider it cheating but I only want to have sex with her.I can have sex with my husband but I feel like he deserves better then me doing it just because..AAHHH..Im freaking out.Anyone else have a similar story or know someone who has?

[curious married m]

Jessy,
My only comment is loving yer husband and sexual attractions in some ways are seperate issues. You say he is OK with you having sex with women, therefore be as fair if he seeks sex with other people be they women if that is his only preference or men if he is bisexual. Too many times on this site, I have seen the ugly head of jealousy rise up. An open relationship has to be a two way street. So if he seeks out another woman for sex, just remeber what's good for the Goose is also good for the Gander. But above all else whomever ya have sex with,the welfare of those 2 kids is top priority.
:2cents:

[parker123]

You are right to love both your husband and your lover, only in different ways. This has no place for jealousy, which is where many people fall off the wagon. Each of us has feelings for others that are difficult to segregate, but we need to recognize each of them and respect them rather than become resentful. Jealousy is one of the most destrucstive emotions, based on a sense of ego demanding the lover to be exclusively owned. Deep within our selves is the sense of polyamorous relations with many others.

[Realist]

These are my views and in no way advice. Only you can know what is best:

Yes, I've heard other stories of this kind and have actually felt the same way (somewhat) but I've never lost my interest, attraction for, or desire, for women. Actually, the pendulum has swung back toward the feminine side these days. Time may change that for you, too.

Jesse, you are YOU and no matter how anyone else has conducted their lives, you must decide what is best for you.

Apparently, unlike so many folks, including me, you have a line of communication with your husband. It appears that you are open and honest with him about how you feel and that's a good thing. When you are truthful with each other, it's easier to decide which way you should go.

I only hope that whatever you two do, it's the best thing for your happiness and the children's welfare. If your husband wants to remain part of your life, or not, he must do what is best for him, too.

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

Jessy, you and your hubby sound like you've got a good communication going between you, dont ever let that stop. And dont listen to Nay Sayers, just be you and you and your hubby decide a happy medium for you both sexually.
Good luck Hon.
Cat

[Georgie_Girl]

I've been in this situation recently, and it's not easy. If you decide to tell him that you feel you are a lesbian, make sure it's just you and him, have your kids at a relative's house or something along those lines. Make sure it's as calm as possible before you say anything. If he is prone to quick decisions and/or anger, hide any weapons in your home. (I'm not trying to say he may hurt you, I've just heard of husbands holding guns to their own heads.) Tell him that you want to be honest with him, and if you want to stay married to him, tell him that, too. He may assume that it's his fault. (My husband did.) Don't let anyone try to 'mediate', as that tends to lead to the mediator taking a side. That's all I can think of at the moment. Good luck! *Hugs*