gayle
May 10, 2005, 5:14 PM
Well, it seems like a funny time to be introducing myself since I have been posting for awhile. (Hey Drew, I'd like to win that avatar!) Anyhow, I've told a bit about myself in my previous postings.
I am a 39 y/o str8 female. That, of course, probably makes anyone wonder why I would be posting to a bi site. Well, it's as simple and complex as this: I have a 43 y/o bi partner. He did not come out to me as being bi for several months after we started dating. I had my first mmf experience with him and after that, I started wondering about his orientation but was too afraid to ask him about it. It took me quite awhile to finally ask and he was quick to tell me he is bi. We have a committed relationship, but we do enjoy the occasional mmf, mmmf, mmmmf (once) experience. We do this about once a month. I will admit it keeps things spicy.
I was molested at age 5 by an uncle and this continued until I was about 13. At that point, I was about 5 pounds overweight and he informed me I was "fat" and that no man would ever want me because I was fat. He stopped molesting me (well, let's be real honest and call it what it was --- rape). Not surprisingly, I developed a weight problem and an eating disorder after that. I have had the occasional round of anorexia and been diagnosed as being anorexic. I've also been grossly overweight. I've lost a significant amount of weight (140 pounds) and am now a healthy weight and I'm told I look great. I am generally a size 4 or 6 now.
I was gang raped at 19 and struggled with anorexia for about 2 years after that. After the birth of my daughter, when I had just turned 22, I started gaining weight. Finally, at 39 I think I have come to turns with the assaults.
During middle school and high school I was accused of being gay because I had little to no interest in boys. Oh, I liked them and had the occasional crush, but I had no interest in sleeping with them. The teasing was pretty brutal and it made me a bit hypersensitive about my sexuality. I always felt like I was supposed to prove I was str8, but I didn't want to have sex and without having sex, I couldn't "prove" I was str8.
Despite the assaults I had endured, I was pretty naive sexually. I didn't know there was such a thing as bisexuality until a couple of years ago when my daughter started telling me about friends of hers that were bi. I still wasn't sure what that meant.
Even after the mmf experience with my boyfriend, I still didn't know anything about bisexuality. I figured maybe he was gay, but that didn't make sense because he likes women's bodies. I really didn't know how to classify him until he finally told me he was bi. Even then, I wasn't terribly sure until he started telling me a few things, then I found this site.
I cannot begin to express how helpful this site has been to me. I have been able to work out what, for me, have been some major issues. For instance, I couldn't figure out how he could be in a committed relationship with me and be bi. It took awhile to realize that it was not necessarily more of a challenge for him to be committed to me than it was for me to be committed to him. Just because he might be attracted to someone else didn't mean he'd act on that attraction.
At this point, I think I am really adjusting well to his being bi. I'm finally at the point where I will tell him if I think a certain guy looks cute. I will admit, it does feel funny sometimes to tell my boyfriend that I think another guy is attractive, but he knows I'm not going to act on the attraction unless we both agree on it and are able to arrange an mmf.
I have found this site to be liberating because I have been able to talk about things here that I would never talk about to my closest friends. I can't imagine talking to my friends about an mmf encounter! I definitely wouldn't tell them my boyfriend is bi. But here, I can talk about things openly and I can get answers to my questions. You'll never know how much I have appreciated the support I have gotten here. It has meant a lot to me to be able to learn I am not the only str8 woman with a bi boyfriend! I'm NOT alone! And it's been great to be able to talk about my fantasies, kinky as they may be. In fact, I'm hoping to live a few of them out in the near future.
Thanks for all the gr8 support here! Great site, Drew! I'm looking forward to when you establish the e-mail accounts. I hope to be amongst the first to get one!
Gayle :angel:
I am a 39 y/o str8 female. That, of course, probably makes anyone wonder why I would be posting to a bi site. Well, it's as simple and complex as this: I have a 43 y/o bi partner. He did not come out to me as being bi for several months after we started dating. I had my first mmf experience with him and after that, I started wondering about his orientation but was too afraid to ask him about it. It took me quite awhile to finally ask and he was quick to tell me he is bi. We have a committed relationship, but we do enjoy the occasional mmf, mmmf, mmmmf (once) experience. We do this about once a month. I will admit it keeps things spicy.
I was molested at age 5 by an uncle and this continued until I was about 13. At that point, I was about 5 pounds overweight and he informed me I was "fat" and that no man would ever want me because I was fat. He stopped molesting me (well, let's be real honest and call it what it was --- rape). Not surprisingly, I developed a weight problem and an eating disorder after that. I have had the occasional round of anorexia and been diagnosed as being anorexic. I've also been grossly overweight. I've lost a significant amount of weight (140 pounds) and am now a healthy weight and I'm told I look great. I am generally a size 4 or 6 now.
I was gang raped at 19 and struggled with anorexia for about 2 years after that. After the birth of my daughter, when I had just turned 22, I started gaining weight. Finally, at 39 I think I have come to turns with the assaults.
During middle school and high school I was accused of being gay because I had little to no interest in boys. Oh, I liked them and had the occasional crush, but I had no interest in sleeping with them. The teasing was pretty brutal and it made me a bit hypersensitive about my sexuality. I always felt like I was supposed to prove I was str8, but I didn't want to have sex and without having sex, I couldn't "prove" I was str8.
Despite the assaults I had endured, I was pretty naive sexually. I didn't know there was such a thing as bisexuality until a couple of years ago when my daughter started telling me about friends of hers that were bi. I still wasn't sure what that meant.
Even after the mmf experience with my boyfriend, I still didn't know anything about bisexuality. I figured maybe he was gay, but that didn't make sense because he likes women's bodies. I really didn't know how to classify him until he finally told me he was bi. Even then, I wasn't terribly sure until he started telling me a few things, then I found this site.
I cannot begin to express how helpful this site has been to me. I have been able to work out what, for me, have been some major issues. For instance, I couldn't figure out how he could be in a committed relationship with me and be bi. It took awhile to realize that it was not necessarily more of a challenge for him to be committed to me than it was for me to be committed to him. Just because he might be attracted to someone else didn't mean he'd act on that attraction.
At this point, I think I am really adjusting well to his being bi. I'm finally at the point where I will tell him if I think a certain guy looks cute. I will admit, it does feel funny sometimes to tell my boyfriend that I think another guy is attractive, but he knows I'm not going to act on the attraction unless we both agree on it and are able to arrange an mmf.
I have found this site to be liberating because I have been able to talk about things here that I would never talk about to my closest friends. I can't imagine talking to my friends about an mmf encounter! I definitely wouldn't tell them my boyfriend is bi. But here, I can talk about things openly and I can get answers to my questions. You'll never know how much I have appreciated the support I have gotten here. It has meant a lot to me to be able to learn I am not the only str8 woman with a bi boyfriend! I'm NOT alone! And it's been great to be able to talk about my fantasies, kinky as they may be. In fact, I'm hoping to live a few of them out in the near future.
Thanks for all the gr8 support here! Great site, Drew! I'm looking forward to when you establish the e-mail accounts. I hope to be amongst the first to get one!
Gayle :angel: