Do you think men tired of women turn bisexual [Archive]

bertoneil

Aug 13, 2009, 2:40 AM

Hi Guys,

My name is bert, i am 40ish and to date in terms of morals and sexuality i have been quite a straight guy. However, today in my life i seem to have a calling, a yearning for same sex experiences.....

Do you think this is because i have lost faith in the love and trust of women?

what i mean is all my life i have trusted and confided in women only to be,,,,,, well not 100% satisfied at core level......do you think this unfulfillment from women is the propellent towards bisexuality?

also i read an article that says men love to suck cock more than lick pussy,,,,, is that true? again i ask because i love licking pussy, but the sound of cock feels really good and if its better than licking pussy, i better get on with it....

What do you think guys?

by the way - i am at peace with myself and my wife, we are not arguing or locked in any battles, these are just questions from the depths of my own being.

Thank you for reading

Regards

Bert

cand86

Aug 13, 2009, 3:46 AM

I don't think guys who get hurt by women "turn bisexual" . . . else there would be a heck of a lot of bisexual men, far more than we see nowadays.

I do think that if you have any inclinations towards it naturally, that an experience that makes you lose faith and trust in women can stir up the desire to experiment with the same sex.

bi bi baby

Aug 13, 2009, 5:06 AM

Interesting post. When things go sour with the lady, it's easy to think about how much less hassle there is between guys, and not just sexually. I suppose the same is true for the ladies. I don't think you "turn" bi, it's who you are, and who you choose to be. In good times and in bad.

elian

Aug 13, 2009, 6:06 AM

I think you either are or are not attracted to certain people - and it might even vary by the person - but to suddenly "turn" one way or the other - doubtful - it's usually a process of discovery, if that.

Realist

Aug 13, 2009, 7:00 AM

Bert

Although you may be feeling the need to be with a man, it does not mean you have lost faith, or interest in women, or especially your wife. It sounds like your wife is supportive of you and is OK with your experimenting. I hope that is a fact.

If that is so, figure out what you want and then, see if you can find a clean, decent, fellow to learn more about this desire with.

As for enjoying men over women; I think that feelings depend on who you're with at the time. Sometimes, you may have a stronger desire to be with a lady, and sometimes you may feel that a man better suits your needs.

Good luck.

Bisexual Explorer

Aug 13, 2009, 7:12 AM

Bert,
Speaking just for myself (I hate generalizations), I'm bi because I enjoy sex with men and with women not because I'm frustrated or bored with one or the other.
g

goldenfinger

Aug 13, 2009, 7:25 AM

You are just like 1000's of other men in that age group. I read somewhere, that women between 17 and 40 years of age were more likely to have a same sex experience then men in the same age group, however, after 40, men were more likely to have a same sex experience. What trigger it is unknown. It comes from inside yourself. If god made everybody like that, nose light up purple, we would have a nice big light show. I have always considered myself straight, but for as long as I can remember, always have had a fantasy of doing oral with another guy. Still to happen, but getting closer.

M. Wolfe

Aug 13, 2009, 7:39 AM

I had a strait friend who said something rather poignant on this subject. He was once opposing the argument that being gay is a choice. He said that on reflecting on his past experiences and awful unhinged ex-girlfriends that if he could choose then he'd turn gay so fast - to the point he even tried it and it just didn't happen.

Kudos to him, I think.

bertoneil

Aug 13, 2009, 8:07 AM

Wow guys...... thank you

I suspected i was bisexual and it was not the woman losing faith thing..... i just wanted to confirm to myself before i action it....

Hopefully i have a lot of fun ahead of me

Once again thank you guys, there is a lot of maturity here, thank you

Bert

bi bi baby

Aug 13, 2009, 8:24 AM

Enjoy the ride. I'm sure you'll find someone to guide you.

Bi_Druid

Aug 13, 2009, 1:39 PM

This is something that can only really be looked at as a case by case basis.

I'd say personally that most guys (and gals for this matter) are what ever sexuality they are, pretty much from birth. I don't think anyone actually 'turns' bi, or gay or whatever, like going to sleep one day one sexuality and waking up the next something different. I know it can feel like that for some people when they turn round and realise their preferences aren't what they originally thought them to be.

I know, looking back on things, that I pretty much was always bi, even if I didn't know or otherwise identify as such til my early 20's.
For me it had nothing to do with being tired or fed up with women. I have also heard this used as a classic excuse for men 'turning' gay, amongst others.

Maybe for you it is, but the only person who could really answer that for you is you yourself.

open2both

Aug 13, 2009, 1:58 PM

"turning"... no... "acknowledging" YES.
We all born bisexual.

12voltman59

Aug 14, 2009, 8:37 AM

When I was younger--I had always read that sexual orientation was something that was "set" at a very young age--and I pretty much believed that-----even though I had done things with other guys at a young age-----I did not self-identify myself as anything other than heterosexual/straight back then--but that sure did change of course--with that change not taking place untill later in life--I thought I was crazy or something in that I "just had to have sex with other guys" at an "older" age---thanks to coming here--I found that "discovering" this about myself at a later stage in life was not at all uncommon---in fact--I have talked to men who came to this realization much, much further along in life than it came to me.

I think that they need to rewrite the "script" that has tended to hold the notion that our desires for those of whatever gender are set at an early age and "that is that!!"---Obviously--nothing could be farther from the truth than that bit of "conventional wisdom" holds dear.

Many of us here are proof that this notion is all shot to hell and back!!!

Realist

Aug 14, 2009, 9:28 AM

While I was very innocent and naive about life, sex and relationships, at 13/14, I was happily seduced by a much older man. For a couple of years after that, I was involved with a total of 3 males, (and one older woman, but this is about males) including my original seducer. With few taboos, I enjoyed a wonderful gratifying period of absolute bliss. At no time in my life was I more sated, or less encumbered by morals, religion, or personal guilt.

From my later teens unto adulthood, I suffered some rough times while dealing with taboos, instilled by others. It took some time for me to realize that I was bisexual and would always be bisexual to a certain degree. Finally, I came to terms with it and have now accepted it, wholly. I'm so lucky to have a wonderful bi GF, who is open and allows me to be myself. I can be totally honest and up-front with her and her only request is that I be cautious and safe.

Anyway, I digressed: No, I do NOT think anyone can TURN a person bisexual, or gay.....or straight, for that matter. I do not think any of my past has "Caused" me to be who I am. I think I have had experiences and adventures with both sexes, because I am and have been bisexual, always.

littlerayofsunshine

Aug 14, 2009, 9:37 AM

That's not true.

I'm homosexual and I have never had any sexual attraction towards women at all and I'm not bisexual.

Even my gay male friends who have had sex with women or who were married to women said how they only did it because they thought that it was expected of them and they were not attracted to their wives or girlfriends at all.

People don't turn bisexual or gay they just discover it about themselves and this can happen later in life or sometimes not at all.

In response to your response to open2both

I don't think he was referring to all people are born bisexual.. Just that Bisexuals are born bisexuals. :rolleyes:

mikey3000

Aug 14, 2009, 7:52 PM

"turning"... no... "acknowledging" YES.
We all born bisexual.

I have to agree with you Open, I think we are all born omnisexual, then consiously and unconsiously steered towards an identity. But I also agree with Bert that over exposure to one sex can throw ones equalibrium out of whack, and you start to crave what you lack.

I'm the only male in my household and I go nuts for male companionship. Did it turn me bi? Noooooo. But did it push me over the edge? Maybe. But I'm happy with it now. No going back for me.

jeancarleo

Aug 15, 2009, 2:14 AM

it's the same as if i turn bisexual cuz i got tired of guys. the answer is no. we just discover were attracted to the sex we don't of just for curiosity. some like, some don't. i've enjoyed both since i can remember just that i started having sex with men at age 21 and women at age 22. i lean more towards guys but that don't make me gay cuz i crave a girl. that's just me. we're all unique.

maytag

Aug 15, 2009, 8:21 AM

AdamKadmon43

Aug 15, 2009, 5:44 PM

I view sex as just the natural extension of a strong friendship, love and bond that I have developed for and with someone.

It does not matter if it is a person of the same sex or the opposite sex. Works for me just as well either way.

nwmscurious

Aug 15, 2009, 11:40 PM

I rarely had a thought about men until my mid 40's. In conversation with men on this site and others, it seems that is the norm. Something hits about middle age. Maybe the need for something more? Don't know why but you are not alone.

I agree with this statement, although in my case I spent considerable time in introspection and realized that I had had a glimmer of interest much earlier but refused to admit it to myself.

littlerayofsunshine

Aug 15, 2009, 11:54 PM

I rarely had a thought about men until my mid 40's. In conversation with men on this site and others, it seems that is the norm. Something hits about middle age. Maybe the need for something more? Don't know why but you are not alone.

Well not being a doctor, can't absolutely be sure. but doctors can't even agree on most concerns about sexuality, so I will give my opinion to your reply..

I have an inkling that how most men discover theirs in their late 30's and 40's, probably has something to do with the natural drop in testosterone and an increase of estrogen.. Men make estrogen too, but their body converts it to testosterone, as they age, the ability weakens. Estrogen becomes more prevalent than in the past and in the ends causes physical and psychological changes within the male body.

just a thought.......it sort of makes sense to me.....