Parked in Chat [Archive]

Cherokee_Mountaincat

Jul 22, 2009, 1:46 PM

Maybe its just my feeble brain (Shup Show) but for the life of me I cant figure out Why people come into chat and just park. Their icon isnt lit up and they dont chat, they just sit there. I went into chat just a minute ago and there's tons of people there, and No One is talking. The lights are all off, and no ones home...so to speak.

The whole purpose of chat is to..well...Chat! Its ok to sit back and watch and laugh and observe the craziness going on, but good grief, chime in once in a while, let us know your alive over in that corner. Come sneak a cookie or brownie off the bar, grab a cold drink from the cooler, . and join in...even just a little bit! That's what chat is For. At least Wave before you go hide in said corner.
How are we suppose to get to know you if you wont talk to us? We're safe, we All dont bite that hard, and we are good people to get to know, so come on people...come talk to us. :bigrin:
Everybodys Cat

_Joe_

Jul 22, 2009, 1:52 PM

They are watching you.

naughty'BI'chick

Jul 22, 2009, 2:06 PM

Cat, some people might be talking with someone else through pm, some can't think of what to say, or just wanna watch the convo.
I'm one of those people that come in to chat and I'll either talk or just watch just depends on what's going on or how my day was.

grayhound

Jul 22, 2009, 2:06 PM

I have entered chat several times when the room seemed to be full. I say hello when I enter, but get no responces. Kind of makes me feel unwanted. So I leave. No one gets to know anyone that way. Have a great day.

**Peg**

Jul 22, 2009, 2:42 PM

codybear3

Jul 22, 2009, 2:49 PM

Cat, I am in the process of improving my typing speed and also in the process of eliminating my typos with the increased speed... But when I have gone into the chatroom (those that know we from a while ago know this to be true), I have a tendency to simple "lurk in the shadows" simply because 1. I like to read all the funny stuff that is being talked about and 2. Because when I see a topic that I could comment on, the topic is long gone by the time I finish tying a "comment", literally... Therefore, when I do go in, (and its rare) I will be among the parked, looking out my window, and hoping to catch a glimpse of folks in there... :paw::paw:

_Joe_

Jul 22, 2009, 2:54 PM

Then theres freeloads like me that are working and just have to sit idle there till someone I like to talk to shows up (I flat out ignore anyone looking for some sex and whatnot in there in case you wonder why I never answer you), and worse when the people I do like show up - I'm busy with work and don't know they are there :(

12voltman59

Jul 22, 2009, 7:04 PM

Well Cat--I am sure that when the room is like that--more than a few of the people are doing private chats----I have one friend on here--he comes into the room and he and I chat--but he never chats in the room or never posts anything on the forums---he has no interest in doing either thing--but he is a nice guy---just like I think it is best that we be accepting of anyone of any sexual orientation/persuasion who wants to come here--we have to be accepting of the many reasons people do come to the site.

One thing you can say that is positive about people who just come and "park" as you put it----a good number of them aren't going to be a bother to ya and ask to IM even if they don't know ya at all, unlike many others who are so presumptuous.

Cherokee_Mountaincat

Jul 22, 2009, 9:24 PM

recognize

Jul 22, 2009, 10:00 PM

well

I park in chat sometimes

ANNNND

I don't want this to sound harsh, just honest: if I'm talking with someone privately I usually minimize the main chatroom... especially if there are some... "undesirables" in the room.

I see some people commenting about bi_dena (for example) not chatting, which is gonna make her feel REAL welcome <sarcasm>.

In all my years of chatting it has been my experience that some regulars have other identities so they can chat privately without being hassled... get my drift?

signed: a live-and-let-live kinda person

:2cents:

Sounds fascinating :tong:

Who knows someone MIGHT be getting some while they're online and forgot to turn the computer off

Or cooking dinner

Or going to the loo

Either way, there are many reasons why their screen names are around, but 'they' arent:bibounce:

12voltman59

Jul 22, 2009, 11:29 PM

Sounds fascinating :tong:

Who knows someone MIGHT be getting some while they're online and forgot to turn the computer off

Or cooking dinner

Or going to the loo

Either way, there are many reasons why their screen names are around, but 'they' arent:bibounce:

Sometimes--my attention does get distracted by something going on "in the real world" and I don't cut my connection to the chat room--I at least do leave the window to the site open and since I tend to let the computer remaining running---it seems I am on here all night long---I am sure I am not the only one to do that.

I also figured it out---it is often the case that you see someone's name still up but they are not on--someone said it is most likely that most of us don't actually log out of here--so the server keeps our names up for a long time after we leave--I know this is a bit off topic--but sorta goes along with this person's post that I have quoted.

Doggiestyle

Jul 23, 2009, 12:04 AM

WOW Cat !!! A cookie maybe, but a brownie ? Hummmmmmmmm I don't know about that. That brownie might be somebody playing a dirty trick on ya, ya know!!! :tong:

Your friend :doggie: .....:flag4:

**Peg**

Jul 23, 2009, 8:58 AM

....I also figured it out---it is often the case that you see someone's name still up but they are not on--someone said it is most likely that most of us don't actually log out of here--so the server keeps our names up for a long time after we leave--I know this is a bit off topic--but sorta goes along with this person's post that I have quoted.

headsup: off topic but it was volty's idea LOL

If, when logging in, you select "remember me" AND don't delete the bisexual.com cookie, then you will "appear" to still be here after you leave.

I get complaints such as "I saw you but you didn't reply" or "it said you were in chat, but you weren't" ...... welllllll that's cause I wasn't here... so lately I've taken to sorting the main page "who's online" by "last activity time". If a person hasn't hit the keyboard in the last 10 mins, I'm fairly certain they aren't here any longer.

Also signing in "invisible" so I can private message friends without other people seeing who I'm messaging... hell that's why it's called a PRIVATE message ! That's the #1 feature of this place I don't like.

hope this helps some folks

Michael623

Jul 23, 2009, 9:31 AM

I am a quiet person by nature. Also, I feel I have a poor vocabulary and I know I am an awful speller. All of that keeps me from chatting very much. But I have to ask....what does it matter if someone comes to chat and doesn't talk in the main room? How is that effecting those that talk? Are those that don't banter with you in the main room obligated to tell you why or stay away? Also, when it's busy at chat it can be intimidating for some...it can get really busy and confusing. I've seen people try and chime in and not one person acknowledge that person said anything. Oh well! I just don't get it, cat!

Cherokee_Mountaincat

Jul 23, 2009, 3:06 PM

Michael-Honey, I wasnt meaning you. I was refering to those who come in but Never talk at all. They dont Im, they dont join the conversations at all, even if you say hello to them, they just park with their lights off..so to speak. I wasnt running anyone down, was just curious. :} Peck to your handsome cheek, Darlin.
Cat

grayhound

Jul 23, 2009, 4:37 PM

Now Grayhound, you know that "I" greet you everytime that I see you. And if I dont see you and dont greet you its only because I'm usually trying to do 50 things at once..lol
Next time I see you, I promise to run over and pounce on you, how's that? lol
Cat :cool:

I know you do hun, so does Ms Peg and a few others and I love you for it. (waiting to be pounced on by lovely people) But when I come in and say hi and there are 20 people in the room you would expect at least one hi back.

void()

Jul 23, 2009, 4:54 PM

Why lurk? (http://www.mit.edu/~mbarker/fill980506/fill980309.txt)

That aside I somewhat agree with you Cat. The purpose of chat is to chat. I no longer come into chat for reasons of technical issues. Hopefully, with my bf coming in this weekend that may get fixed. But, I'm also out of chat for a couple of personal reasons.

I can share a few. 1. Have met a great guy, don't need another. 2. See number two in the link's text. 3. I have some mental and emotional problems. Everyone knows that. I don't need to be a broken record. 4. I'm working toward solving or treating those problems. 5. I get busy living life, enjoying family.

Really haven't many friends off line. There's my wife, bf, that's about it. Of course, they ought to be my friends. :) And I'm an INTP / INTS which means there's a lot of quiet 'private' time. And it means not really being a great social person. Don't get me wrong, love small groups in small doses. I'm just not a mainstream flock member.

So I stay outside a good bit. That's okay, too. :) Usually someone at least asks if I'm good. I try to be. :)

TwylaTwobits

Jul 23, 2009, 6:57 PM

I don't visit chat as much as I should on here, but I have usually seen conversations going when I enter and I have been greeted. I have also been the recipient of the pms going hey wanna fuck? I usually say no the ones I don't wanna talk to and move on.

It's a bit like going to the bar and the ones who've been drinking all night suddenly think even their reflection is beautiful and they try their luck.

But I can see Cat's point, it can be frustrated to go and say hello and not get a response when the room is "full". But as Joe and others said some are at work or other places or just busy with other things at the moment like pms and have the window minimized.

Guilty of it myself as I respond to this post..oops back to chat for a bit