Why is being a bi man a bad thing???

[canisdirus]

It seems that with today’s societal pressure for honesty about one’s sexual preference and openness to sensual delights, the lines are getting blurred.
As a bi-curious man I prefer to meet and safely play with open minded bi couples for mutual pleasure and friendship. At times if we hit it off very well the men play one on one as well and then joined in afterwards. In connecting with so called open minded people who are “Pro Bi” if that is a term shut down and do not wish to converse any longer if they find out that you are a bi-curious or bi man. Why is it such a challenge to freely express yourself without threatening someone else’s boundary issues.
Any advise on meeting bi couples who are actually here to meet people? Sorry for the rant, just getting frustrated.. Thanks for reading.
:rolleyes:

[Intimate_Light]

Who says it's a bad thing? You've just had some bad experiences, to which my suggestion is:

--- Inquire/find out what a couple really means by bi-friendly, pro-bi, etc. That is, be up front: ask if the man is truly bi or bi-curious--and if the woman is turned on by such intimacy. Even talk about what he and she really would like to do with you... before you ever get anywhere near to getting naked together.

In short: Clear, mutually respectful communication on the front end paves the road to good experiences and avoids unpleasant ones on the, uh, back end (or whatever end or ends you like :)

[Dano111]

I had the most fantastic experience, using this site. The couple met me at a hotel, we had dinner, nothing great ,dinner that is, though got to meet each other.

After much conversation, she wanted to see the guys play with one another. This we did, and she took photos.

Many times guys try to act Bi just to get to the woman. This could be why you are having a diffucult time. Not saying you are acting, though you always have to be up front: As I was told, many guys just want to get to the woman.

Though I absolutely enjoyed the company of this woman, I totally enjoyed the experience of her watching us together. That is ,her guy and Myself.

My suggestion is to be up front: Let any know your intentions. Bisexuality is sooooo fun. Wish you the same luck as myself.

[Intimate_Light]

Dano111,

Your experience sounds like fun but... "she wanted to see the guys play with one another. This we did, and she took photos."

I'm good at photo and video too, but one thing I am keenly aware of is photos can come back to haunt you. I'd never let someone I barely knew take such pics of me. Hopefully you have some control or guarantees.

Or at least that your faces don't show up in the photos.

[vittoria]

Many times guys try to act Bi just to get to the woman. This could be why you are having a diffucult time. Not saying you are acting, though you always have to be up front: As I was told, many guys just want to get to the woman.


Verily!!

As part of a bi couple, that is what happens to us a great deal of the time~~ we place a profile, let everyone know up front what we want, and be damned if everytime some dOOd asks.. "when do i bang her" or some other dumb shyt "how involved will she get" "will she be getting involved" "cant wait to do both of you" or some other random ignorance.

It may not be your case, but this happens as well... its all in the approach. If one enters into a situation all gung ho for 'tang (lmao!!) then the hopes WILL be dashed some dOOds dont want to share their wives/GFs... just the 'dick'. :tong:

[12voltman59]

It seems that all too often, when a couple is looking for a bisexual situation---they (especially the husband) wants to find a "bisexual/bicurious female" but not a male---and many married guys who say they like bisexual sex---they are not interested in doing anything with another guy---they just want the wife to play---

Same goes for swingers groups or swingers clubs----single females who will do "bi sex" are more than welcome---but bimales-----it's "don't call us--we'll call you. (in a pig's eye!)"

[etncple]

Being a bi male isn't a "bad" thing, it just scares the hell out of a lot of people, for a number of so-called reasons.

Most of these "reasons are a product of society and it's definitions of what is "right or wrong", "normal or abnormal", "good or bad". Men are afraid of it because they don't want to be thought of being gay, or unmanly. Many women feel the same way, even a lot of bi women on the swing sites feel that way. We have had quiet a few bi/bicurious men contact us on a swinger site and a lot of them were hiding it from their bi wives...weird

There is also a misconception that all bi men are hooking up in men's rooms at airport bathrooms, parks, gyms etc and therefore all bi men are at a much greater risk of having some STD or HIV/Aids.

I do think this site has more people really looking for friends, friends with benefits or relationships rather that a quick hookup, than any site I have seen.

One of the few benefits of getting older is you actually do gain some insight to yourself and others and, at least for me, I don't really give a rats ass what anyone thinks of bi men. Opinions are like assh***s, everyone has one. I try and live my life as best I can, accept others for who they are and I expect the same in return. If my wife is happy with me( she knows, accepts and enjoys me being bi) and I am with her, who cares what others think.

Accept who you are, what your desires, wants, needs etc are, and life becomes a bit easier.

[JosieAnne]

I feel it is more acceptable for women to be bisexual because men seem to find it hot.

[hedonic]

To me JosieAnne, If a person is bi, then youd find both same sexes getting it on, HOT. I mean, wouldnt we? I do. And I refer to myself as Pansexual to my mates, it tweaks em out even though they dont judge. :~)Cheers, tp:bigrin:

[bityme]

I don't think being a bi man is a bad thing, its great!

When dealing with couples, I have found that it is best to take things slow. I never make first contact with a couple when the guy lists himself as straight. They have to contact me first and I clearly identify myself as bisexual. If the guy is listed as bi or bi curious, I always offer to meet with the guy first. They take me up on that offer about 5 out of 6 times.

Once I have a date with the couple, I always pay attention to the guy first. I want them to know I not there just because I want to play with the woman. I let the guy bring me into the action with his lady. That way everyone is comfortable. If you are respectful to the woman and let both of them know that you enjoyed playing with each, there is a good possibility of being invited back.

Sunday I had a wonderful experience. A couple I've played with before (played with the husband alone first) were out shopping. She had purchased one of those Pyrex dildos and he got a couple of porn dvds. On the spur of the moment, they gave me a call, asking if they could stop by. I said sure!

They came over, we watched some bi porn, and retired to the bedroom. I had a lovely time, making sure that I paid attention to both of them. I also waited until he brought me into the play with her, and they had come to my house.

If the man knows that you are not there just to screw his lady, then he is much more comfortable about things. I also never use crude language around a lady. Showing respect to both of them means more future meetings.

Yes, she tried out her new dildo!

[JosieAnne]

To me JosieAnne, If a person is bi, then youd find both same sexes getting it on, HOT. I mean, wouldnt we? I do. And I refer to myself as Pansexual to my mates, it tweaks em out even though they dont judge. :~)Cheers, tp:bigrin:

I would find it hot, but to a straight man, it is more acceptable to be a bi woman, as they always say thing like "can I watch?"

[rissababynta]

It seems that all too often, when a couple is looking for a bisexual situation---they (especially the husband) wants to find a "bisexual/bicurious female" but not a male---and many married guys who say they like bisexual sex---they are not interested in doing anything with another guy---they just want the wife to play---

Same goes for swingers groups or swingers clubs----single females who will do "bi sex" are more than welcome---but bimales-----it's "don't call us--we'll call you. (in a pig's eye!)"

Good to know my guy is a minority lol

[Orlando157]

Why is being a bi man a bad thing???

Being a bi man is not a bad but it opens the door to doing some very good things - You might consider hanging out with more compatible people - Then you can all do bad things together and everyone will feel very good

It's the people you spend time with that are the turn on ... the sexual mechanics always have a way of working out with good people

[lv69cpl69]

I feel it is more acceptable for women to be bisexual because men seem to find it hot.

Unfair? hell yes but true for most of the world. I have noticed on some other sites where you see man listed as str8 and women as bi. then you get a wink or e-mail from the "str8" guy that wants to meet a bi man. I won't even reply to them. I can't be so open and let the world know us (due to work and the way the world looks at bi men) but at least i am honest with my self. no it is not a bad thing. Someday I hope to have my first MM time!