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M. Wolfe
Apr 17, 2009, 10:00 AM
I'll make this my official introduction thread (I know, I know I have a couple up already - ignore them).

Hi. I'm Mike Wolfe, 20 y/o Uni student from Dunedin. I study psych, linguistics and German - I'd like to go to Germany after uni.

Anyway, as a normal boy I started to like girls around 10/11 and that was fine. THEN at around 13/14 one of my friends became attractive. Naturally I became affectionate and amorous.

Before long I realised there are something a little gay going on here so I disparately started to fight it. I did so because I believed, as many christians do, that homosexuality was intrinsically wrong so in my own head through my own will, I chastised myself - did what I could to suppress those attractions and desires.

I continued to do that for a while but as with any desire, it's hard to not seek gratification. From about 16 onwards I indulged it but kept it to myself. Over that time I had more than a few same-sex crushes and yearnings but completely walled it all off from the inside out.

Earlier last year, I became atheist-agnostic, giving me a whole new out look at the world. Up until this point I had been consciously choosing to act strait
but then I asked myself "Why the hell should I choose one gender? I don't really have to, and I shouldn't cheat myself out of all the fun & live I could have."

Bout a month later I had organised a bbq for my mates, ribbs and beer etc. I made the announcement there. "I'm bisexual." My friends toasted me, all were incredibly supportive. Matt told me that since I hadn't actually changed, there was no reason to think of me any differently.

Then another month following that I told mum. She was confused.
"How do you know?"
"It's pretty simple, not a lot to be unsure about."
"I see."

I said that talking to her about such things was very uncomfortable, so if she has any questions it would be easier for both of us if she went and researched the answers herself - which she did, thank goodness.

I haven't told dad yet, or my brother for that matter. My brother and I hate each other so I don't feel I owe him the knowledge. Dad is complicated, he was never around when I was young and I have only known him properly for a couple of years. I'm not afraid of his possible reaction, I'm just not overly motivated to say anything and I haven't really had an opportunity.


Anyway that's about it. Nice to meet everyone.

graytwo
Apr 17, 2009, 12:56 PM
I'll make this my official introduction thread (I know, I know I have a couple up already - ignore them).

Hi. I'm Mike Wolfe, 20 y/o Uni student from Dunedin. I study psych, linguistics and German - I'd like to go to Germany after uni.
[ content snipped by GT...]
Nice to meet everyone.

Huh?. Oh btw, GT is me, I snipped the "Quote". Not those heavy handed, censure seeking Right Wing/Left Wing, or is it? ?? Those Left Wing/Right Wing goofies.. maybe it's those wanabee-WildWingNutts types that deal with weapons and create labels. Just make sure that they don't pervert the fabric of whatever we're talking about. :)

Ok, come out from where??? And why say, I'm out! (?) Again, from where?

You are a good person. You have values and compassion for those around you. There is no need to apologize to any one. Venting your story helps. I think most/all of us on this board understand what your going through, fingers x'ed.. and we support.

First clear your mind and take a deep breath 'cause I have 5 questions.
1. Do you perceive yourself as a M, F, TS, or......?
2. Is Heterosexuality, M/F, the only way?
3. Can a Man love another Man or a Woman love another Woman emotionally beyond the physical sexual encounter?
4. Can a Man love another Man or a Woman love another Woman just for the physical sexual encounter without the emotion?

- now think before you answer the next question -

5. Do you think yourself as being weird?

Now answers to the questions.....................:wiggle2:

Guess what? I have no score any of the first 4 questions since they were there to make you think.. The only one that can be scored is #5.

#5 - Yes, Hey, welcome friend, you think your not normal but want a more self centered view of physical and emotional relationships. Hate to tell you this... your not weird so lighten up on your self. You'll get #5 right the next time!

#5 - No. Hey, welcome friend, your normal and enjoy a more worldly view of physical and emotional relationships.

Bottom line, nothing in relationships is weird, sex might get a little weird but I'm not going there.

M. Wolfe
Apr 17, 2009, 10:03 PM
1: M
2: No
3: Yes
4: Yes


5. Do you think yourself as being weird?

Weird how? I'm plenty weird in all sorts of ways - eccentric might be the right word.
If I'm not weird, what am I? There doesn't seem much point in not being weird.


Do I consider myself weird because I can go both ways is what I think you are getting at. If it is then, no. I consider myself both atypical and damn lucky but not weird. Maybe I did when I was younger but not now. I've talked to many people of differing orientations so I know that there is a tendency in people to be attracted to the opposite sex, it may even be a strong tendency but it's not law.

A lot of anti-gay people say that gays choose to be gay. I think if I actually did manage to choose this, then I'd be weird.

M. Wolfe
Apr 18, 2009, 8:43 AM
Ok, come out from where??? And why say, I'm out! (?) Again, from where?

You threw me here, what are talking about?

AmericanBeauty
Apr 18, 2009, 3:12 PM
You threw me here, what are talking about?

M.Wolfe-He doesn't know what it means to be out, open about your sexuality, or out of the closet.

PansexualGuy
Apr 18, 2009, 4:53 PM
nice to meet ya wolf.
I'm 20 years old dude too as well but I'm pansexual =]
from the US and im out(to friends family blah blah blah lol)
idenitified as straight then gay then bi now pan.
Pan is the most accurate for me.

M. Wolfe
Apr 18, 2009, 7:44 PM
M.Wolfe-He doesn't know what it means to be out, open about your sexuality, or out of the closet.

I see.



nice to meet ya wolf.
I'm 20 years old dude too as well but I'm pansexual =]
from the US and im out(to friends family blah blah blah lol)
idenitified as straight then gay then bi now pan.
Pan is the most accurate for me.

Awesome. In a society were you are strait until proven gay, bisexuality tends to confuse people, bisexuals included. So I can only imagine how much more frustrating explaining pansexual to fam&friends would have been.

I identify as bi because I distinguish between the male and female a lot, I find them attractive for different reasons and the bonds I form with each feel quite different.