Messiest sex you've ever had?

[JohniBi]

Once used whiped cream on a girl who was a squirter. :bigrin:

[jem_is_bi]

We need more details!!!!

[Lonewolf76]

Plastic sheeting and lots and lots of chocolate syrup - yummy!

[jem_is_bi]

I still want to know about the whiped cream.

[bityme]

Two couples playing naked Twister with lots of baby oil.

[darkeyes]

Not 2 sure yad call it messiest sex me ev had.. more like messiest almos sex.. hav told the story before but lil reminda won do ne harm.. wen me bf tried 2 take me virginity an cum fore 'e even penetrated... God the disappointment an embarrassment.. an stikky gooey 'orrible mess ova me legs bits an knicks..:eek:

[elian]

Aww, I dunno Fran, if I was into those Dom/Sub type of things I would say it's pretty erotic to be able to make someone ..err..happy just by thought alone. <smiles>

[Tom60152]

Before I was married to my wife I had a female friend that was a intense squirter.Well one time we hooked up with another bi couple and the wife happened to also be a squirter.Needless to say a contest was indeed in order.So we got the gals next to each other on the bed(protected by a shower curtain liner).The other guy and I just went to town on both women,taking turns on each.The result was explosive.The room was wet everywhere.To amazing for words to describe.But all i can say is the maid the next day certainly earned her tip.


As a side note,after the girls were done,they made us men have a contest who could shoot the farthest.

[rissababynta]

Lube, syrups, redi whip, and that time of the month :eek:

nuff said...

[JohniBi]

Lube, syrups, redi whip, and that time of the month :eek:

nuff said...

WOW!:eek: I'd kinda...like to...see...that...:eek:

[AmericanBeauty]

You did ask.

My ex partner, he and I pissed and spit on each other, while calling each other names (we both love VA/humiliation), he drank my piss and swallowed all of my cum that wasn't on his face. We also dripped hot wax on our bodies and genitals.

When I fingered him when I was sucking his cock he wasn't clean and I didn't flip out or anything but I just got up and washed my hands with soap and water in the bathroom and then went back to sucking and 69ing with him.

[darkeyes]

Aww, I dunno Fran, if I was into those Dom/Sub type of things I would say it's pretty erotic to be able to make someone ..err..happy just by thought alone. <smiles>

Huh.. by time me wos finished wiv 'im the daft sod wos owt but happy... an wen it did finally happen me wos less than ecstatic an all:(.. wich gave 'im more reason 2 feel rite mizzy.. an me reason 2 move on 2 betta things..:bigrin:;)

[jem_is_bi]

Messy sex for me has always been with well-lubricated women or that time of the month. With men, I swallow the evidence before it hits the sheets.
Further, how about messy with your cloths? Why do women who are invited to ones home for discrete sex leave undergarments in out-of-way places to be found by those who are not supposed to know? How can a woman forget bras and panties when they leave?

[Doggiestyle]

Hey Jem-Is-Bi :)
The answer is kinda obvious, one night stands always leave their "evidence" stuffed into places that they know that the only way that it'll likely be found is by the wife (or girlfrnd). I cannot explain why, it's always been that way, that I have seen. Not all women do that, just some. My experence (and others that I have known) is after a one nite stand has left, immediately go through the house and look for "forgotten undies" like in between the top & bottom mattress, inside a pillow case, under the bed, in a dresser drawer, in a closet, in the laundry rm / dirty clothes hamper, in the cushons of or under the couch, ETC ETC ETC. I could go on & on about places where I have heard of, and experienced myself, that women (AND SOME MEN) have left "evidence of past hankey-pankey" I figgured out a way to see if anything had been forgotten is to before you leave the house to get a good hug from (him or her) and rub em kinda all over to check for all clothing, like yep she's wearin a bra or yep he's wearin that correct undershirt. And then, after a good hug tell them you wanna "kiss that thing goodbye" and that will allow you to check for the correct underwear. Correct meaning that they didn't leave theirs and wear yours or your wife's / girlfrnd undies. Never happened to me but I have heard of it happining to others!!! SURPRISE :eek:

Now to the original question????

My messiest moment??? Had to have been back when I was a younger lad, in a motorcycle gang, at a big party, in front of most of a drunken motorcycle gang (me drunken too, I need to say that). I screwed and then did a muff dive into one of the clubs mommas. She haddent had a douch in years and was seriously on the rag too. Needless to say, my face was a mess. That was also the nite I got my nick-name "Doggie". The gang gave me HELL for a long time over that one. The off the wall comments strain and embarrassment I felt over that, from the gang, was really overwhelming. :yikes2: It took a while for me to accept what I did, and to laugh about it with them. After that the gang got together and rounded up me a Air Force avaitors wings and didn't paint just the tips of them red, rather they painted the whole avaitors wings red, before they gave them to me at a club meeting. The club at that time was about 40 members strong. But now not very many ex members of that ex club left these days. There are a few left in this town, and a few livin in other towns, and a few that I don't know what happened to them, and a few in jail. Most of them are dead. I went to a funeral of one that died 2 years ago that was a real friend and that got me on my first Harley Davidson. Was previously riding a Honda. :(

Dammmmmm done said too much allready, gotta go, so i'll type at ya later. Your friend, Doggie........:doggie:..........:bipride:

[innaminka]

Not really tat messy - I'm a little inhibited when it comes to food insertions,
but one does spring to mind.

My hubby and i were having a weekend away at a wedding and after a nice bonk, we decided my bottom needed attention.
In the dark, Dean grabbed the lube we always discretely carry for such little eventualities and lubed my back door beautifully with mint toothpaste .... :eek:

We carried on regardless although we both started to tingle a bit.
It looked funny after finishing: this thick white ring around the base of his thing. :tong: