Post-dating advice - I need an honest opinion

[DeShawn2]

I know that we're all different and handle situations differently. And, that's great! However, I need some advice.

I went out with this guy a few times and I told him that I liked him. The next thing I know, we went from hanging out twice a week to not hearing from him for almost 3 weeks. Then, he invites me for beers, like we’re great buddies and I’m the one that has to bring it up. The next thing I know, he says I was hard to read, that he’s seeing another guy (we weren’t in an exclusive relationship) that I’m “figuring out” bisexuality, etc. and I tell him he’s a coward, making excuses for not just telling me then and there and that we can’t even be FRIENDS.

Then, about 3 weeks laters, I saw him and his new boyfriend walk up to me. He says hi, all friendly as ever, and I give him a high five, which I’ve never done. I guess I was just that happy for acknowledgement from him. Then, I was friendly to him, as if we were just always good buddies in passing.

What the hell was I thinking? Did I take the high road, become a doormat, or what?

Thank you all!

[Lonewolf76]

Personally, I think you took the high road. I've met and been involved with guys like this before. Don't really know why they do the things they do - some say it's the way we're wired - you know the old - go out and breed and populate the world wiring which makes it all about sex. My own take, from my own experiences is that honesty is ALWAYS the best policy and if he was seeing someone he wasn't hnest with you. IMHO - you have a right to be pissed about that. I know you mentioned that you weren't in an exclusive relationship so he was free to be with someone else - but he shouldn't have lead you on. I too have heard the bullshit excuse that you are "trying to figure things out" - what does that have to do with being honest??
I think your high fiving him showed that you weren't a basketcase pining away for him. Drop his loser ass, forget him and move onto to someone who isn't a "Player" as he so obviously is. Just my :2cents:

[graytwo]

...
I went out with this guy a few times and I told him that I liked him. The next thing I know, we went from hanging out twice a week to not hearing from him for almost 3 weeks. Then, he invites me for beers, like we’re great buddies and I’m the one that has to bring it up. ....
......
What the hell was I thinking? ....

Ok, back your train up a bit. You liked him and expressed that... He bailed!!! and disappeared. Main problem was 'commitment'. Your expression sent the msg of you'd like it - his response was to flee. His contact with you was 'test the waters - maybe more fun/games?'. Even if you did the 'fun/games', the result would be the same. Seems your looking for a committed relationship and this person whats none of that. Think of the horror you'd go through if you locked together and it failed... I'm sorry, a committed relationship failure is as close to the mental part of a physical war and how it affects you after. Those that have been in both, might understand.........

How about, free your mind up AND not look for a committed relationship where your both locked to each other. Think! What do you want? What does the other want? What makes working/living together now and the future fun? IF you both seem pointed in the same direction - THEN and ONLY then worry about trying to make it work before committing. OTHERWISE, be happy, be safe and know that your a good person struggling through life like the rest of us.

[PolyLoveTriad]

Wish we had been as smart as you and gotten out before we made fools of ourselves.