Giving up

[PolyLoveTriad]

Well I think we are going to give up on finding someone. Only because we aren't interested in being a quick fuck for anyone who just wants to be friends. Maybe we're just prude, maybe we simply aren't right for anyone, who knows, but I'm soooo tired of getting the run around. Where is the love in people anymore and why does everyone just want a quick lay with all the diseases out there? That for me will just never make any sense at all. Anyway, hubby might not be done looking but Ive had it. Tired of getting my hopes up only to be let down. Just sick and tired of the bs. Good luck gang...

[_Joe_]

:(

Quitters never win :(

[PolyLoveTriad]

Never win either way... just one let down after another, whats the point of continuing to try and put yourself through hell... sometimes its just better to give up

[jem_is_bi]

Sometimes, a quick fuck and other such games lead to much more. Many of us love to have quick fun, but for some of us that is never enough.
So, look deeper into a potential partner, rather than reject someone because, initially they only are interested in a quick fuck. The water may be much deeper than you can see by your initial impression.

At first, I only wanted a quick fuck with my present partner. However, we have been together for 3 years and what we have just keeps getting better.

[PolyLoveTriad]

I guess its because of our age. And seeing people we know die from aids. We have far too much respect for ourselves and our wants, needs, dreams to take a chance having a one night stand with anyone who is extremely clear about what they want and what they dont want. Sure, we could use a condom like my one friend did. He ended up with aids from a one night stand where he used a condom but the condom broke. Murhpeys law, if it can happen, it will. Im just tired of people who the first thing they say to you is "I want to fuck lets get it over with" or people who think you want to see a pic of their asshole before a pic of their face.

[rissababynta]

Sometimes, a quick fuck and other such games lead to much more. Many of us love to have quick fun, but for some of us that is never enough.
So, look deeper into a potential partner, rather than reject someone because, initially they only are interested in a quick fuck. The water may be much deeper than you can see by your initial impression.

At first, I only wanted a quick fuck with my present partner. However, we have been together for 3 years and what we have just keeps getting better.

Yeah, my husband and I pretty much started as fuck buddies. We had no serious intentions. 5 and a half years and 3 kids later here we are...

But still, I know what you mean. You want something more meaningful than a one night stand, as do I, which is why I'm beginning to give up on my own search myself.

[DeShawn2]

I'm sorry to hear that.

Are there signs that you can tell when someone's a flaky asshole?

[jem_is_bi]

I guess its because of our age. And seeing people we know die from aids. We have far too much respect for ourselves and our wants, needs, dreams to take a chance having a one night stand with anyone who is extremely clear about what they dont want and what they dont want. Sure, we could use a condom like my one friend did. He ended up with aids from a one night stand where he used a condom but the condom broke. Murhpeys law, if it can happen, it will. Im just tired of people who the first thing they say to you is "I want to fuck lets get it over with" or people who think you want to see a pic of their asshole before a pic of their face.

Definitely, be careful, you do not want to die young. But, you cannot escape the eventual embrace of angel of death. You can depart with a smile knowing that all that you have accomplished and experienced all that was really important to you. The rest of it does not matter. When I was 30, I was briefly in the embraced of that angel. A brief but firm hug that made me very aware of how wonderful the gift of life is. I suspect the next embrace will not be so brief. But, thankfully that angel gave me more than enough time to accomplish and experience all that is important to me. However, I only totally avoided risk that was incedental to my life goals. Sometimes, I lost, always, I got back on my feet and went forward. The joys of life are not for free you have to work for them. It make them even better.

[_Joe_]

You know, everyones looking for something different... and it's discouraging after so long and to give up.

I'm sorta on the totally other side of the search that you're on. I'm married, with kids, and want to stay faithful... so I'm just looking for friends to just go out drinking with, play some pool, bullshit at the bar, etc etc.

So far all I'm getting is folks wanting to fuck, seeing how Im married I certainly can't be some loser or diseased or something (which ok thats true) and then I'm shunned because ... well, It's stupid to not want sex and be out here. On top of being married and with kids, well, I get alot of cold shoulders when I'm out at the gay bar I like to hang out at and just talk and drink.

I don't have the option of really giving up, as I'm too damn lonely and sick and tired of having to mentally analyze everythign I say so I wont get my face punched by bigot texas rednecks.

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

I totally understand your heart ache and frustration, Sweetie. You are going to find some people that arent looking for a commited relationship or just a friendship type of situation. Many just want that quick fling we talked about. And its too bad that the cant see life for what it is and respect your wishes.
But, life is what you make of it so dont give up in your search. There are some great people out there; just make it Perfectly clear in what you are searching For, and dont back down. :}
Big hugs to ya'll, Hon.
Cat

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

I totally understand your heart ache and frustration, Sweetie. You are going to find some people that arent looking for a commited relationship or just a friendship type of situation. Many just want that quick fling we talked about. And its too bad that the cant see life for what it is and respect your wishes.
But, life is what you make of it so dont give up in your search. There are some great people out there; just make it Perfectly clear in what you are searching For, and dont back down. :}
Big hugs to ya'll, Hon.
Cat

[BiJoe696]

Met my wife over 20 yrs ago via an ad in a "Swing Mag"
Have also met several long term friends thru web sites like this one and others I (or we_) have ads on.
You never know what you might find, I sure lucked out a number of times.

[diB4u]

To all the ones that are giving up- I'm sorry yeah i know what you mean.

Quick fuck?- fuckbuddies, been there and done that!!


rissababynta- yeah thats true as well.. Ahhh i dont know..

I'm unlucky in love period lol... Finding one share my life with is difficult enough, finding two men to share my life and love is impossible.


But sometimes things happen for a reason- and just go with the flow..

[PolyLoveTriad]

Just wanted to say I love you guys.... Rissa Id bug the crud out of you if I lived within 50 miles of you luv, and Joe, lol Joe Joe Joe... well, you know what I mean :)

[_Joe_]

No, I don't, I don't have a gun in my hand....

[Realist]

Over 14 years ago, a LTR with a male lover ended when we moved apart. I did not find another lover until last year. I am very selective and that cut my opportunities way down. Also, I was aging, so it's not nearly as easy to meet compatible lovers. So, just like you, I gave up. I went all that time without touching another guy.

Then, out of the blue, last August, I met a remarkable fellow with whom I (Beginning in October) had a brief, but exceptionally gratifying relationship. It seems when you try less, more happens, or, at least when you don't expect it. Some of the best and most memorable lovers I ever had, didn't come from looking for them; they just appeared out of nowhere!

[PolyLoveTriad]

Over 14 years ago, a LTR with a male lover ended when we moved apart. I did not find another lover until last year. I am very selective and that cut my opportunities way down. Also, I was aging, so it's not nearly as easy to meet compatible lovers. So, just like you, I gave up. I went all that time without touching another guy.

Then, out of the blue, last August, I met a remarkable fellow with whom I (Beginning in October) had a brief, but exceptionally gratifying relationship. It seems when you try less, more happens, or, at least when you don't expect it. Some of the best and most memorable lovers I ever had, didn't come from looking for them; they just appeared out of nowhere!

Im happy for ya luv, hopefully it wont take that long for us though! Im just tired I guess, a big pain in the ass it is, no pun intended.

[alegrias]

Well, I certainly understand where you're coming from.

Our "friends" were almost at the point that you're at. They had tried for several years to find the right couple, thought they had found them, but then it didn't work out. They talked to and met a lot of couples they found on line. Most were out for a quick fuck, like you said.

Then they found us. . .

[Realist]

Along with my loving, open-minded, pretty, loving, intelligent, sensuous, loving, voluptuous and wonderful girlfriend, (did I mention she was very loving?) who is also incidentally bisexual, we have decided that we'd love to share a close relationship with another person, or maybe a couple. However, like those of you who are very cautious and selective, we have considered that we may never find those who we seek. We are very happy with each other and if we remain alone in our relationship, I think we will always love and cherish each other. We certainly are not bored, or depend on others for our gratification. Still, it would be rewarding to have someone of a like mind, to share our interests and desire with.

Last year, I had a gay lover, who I thought developed a strong intellectual, emotional, and physical bond with me. But when I began the relationship with my GF, although he stated that he was OK with my seeing her, he began backing away and finally drifted off without explanation. I think he was unable to adapt to my being bisexual and more apt to love women, than men, at a higher level. I can't be all things to all people, but I am happy with my life.

[rissababynta]

Just wanted to say I love you guys.... Rissa Id bug the crud out of you if I lived within 50 miles of you luv, and Joe, lol Joe Joe Joe... well, you know what I mean :)

That is absolutely wonderful to know! And oddly enough, makes me feel a litle more depressed now! :( lmao