Not sure what to do

[gaznh42]

Hi everyone, I'm really hoping to get some advice about this. I have been i a relationship for 2 years with a wonderful man. Recently I found out he was chatting with other women on a singles website. I brought it to his attention that I saw it, and he swears he never meant anything by it. He loves me, and I know that, but now he says that I should get a gf to play with too, as I am somewhat bi(I like playing with girls but prefer him) Since we got together I have never done anythig with another girl, and it kind of bothers me that this is coming right after I caught him talking to other women. Please help me. Thank you all.

[darkeyes]

Wondaful man?? Mayb..seems 2 me 'e is hopin for a part in ya fun n games shudya agree.. or preparin ya for 'im strayin by encouragin ya 2 hav ya own fun..or mayb lil bitta both.. mayb 'e is genuine tho an u kno 'im betta than ne of us.. woteva 'e is thinkin suggest ya think very carefully boutya whole relationship... an wetha 'e is as wondaful asya think...

[Realist]

I would think this is something that should happen only after you and he discussed it, then came to come kind of agreement, first. I would be very suspicious of his secretive Internet use. You may have seen only the tip of the iceberg! If you plan to marry this fellow, please make sure he's who you think he is, before committing your life to him.

'Nuff said...........................

[csrakate]

I'm sorry but for him to suggest that you "hook up" with a woman after you discovering his chats sends a red flag up in my book. Seems like he's trying to deflect his own guilt by "allowing" you to play as well. You two need to talk and to establish some guidelines as to what is and what isn't acceptable in this relationship. By all means don't let his new found interest in you hooking up cloud a very obvious need of his own to talk to other women....however innocent he may claim it to be. And don't fall for that "I was only trying to find someone for YOU" angle either....if that were the case, he would have discussed it with you openly.

Kate

[gaznh42]

Thanks for the input guys & gals :) A little more about this issue, it's our first problem since we got together, so I really do have faith in him that he's telling me the truth about it not being serious. I love him with all my heart, and we've both been cheated on before, by exes so he knows how I'm feeling about him talking to these women. I plan to talk to him about the whole gf thing in full before going through with it. Thanks again for the input! :tong:

[paddington]

Hi, i ended a relationship with a woman last year.she is a very manipulative liar,able to come up with excuses to cover up that seem resonable at the time,later that little instinctive voice would tap me on the shoulder and tell me it didn't add up, you're being tapped on the shoulder- don't ignore you're instincts.

it can be hard cutting someone out-i'm struggling with it but i know my ex is a liar.

take care