Random thoughts

[Realist]

At 68, I've been around the block a time, or two. During that time I have evolved and changed in several ways. It has now been over 14 years since I was in a sexual relationship with a male and although I'd like to have a close male friend, confidant and even a sexual partner, I suspect he was my last.

My primary interest, of late, is in the ladies, of whom I will be forever enamored. As I look back, there's been some real "peaches" and a few not-so-peachy ones, too.

It's been my experience, that even bisexuals have their prejudices and differences, but most of the bisexual men and women (whom I have met) are much more flexible and open-minded, than straight ones. There certainly are tolerant straight women and men, too, but I've met a very few. Gays, as a rule, seem to be of the opinion that there's no such thing as bisexuals...some even theorize that it's impossible to "sit on the fence"

My last relationship with a woman, ended last month, because she could not tolerate my bisexuality. I could accept her for who she is, but she could not return the favor.

The thread on "girls don't count" rings home with me, too.

My first wife, who was probably the love of my life, was openly bi, but felt that sex between two men was both degrading and disgusting. She called it perverse!

In her mind, love and sex between two pretty, soft, feminine, women, was as natural as breathing. But, at the same time, sex involving two men was not!

She expected me to allow her to do as she wished with her lover, and I did... with no strings attached. However, there's no way she'd accept me doing the same with another guy. I loved her enough to do as she wished, but lost a little of myself in the process.

'nuff said.

[DiamondDog]

Gays, as a rule, seem to be of the opinion that there's no such thing as bisexuals...some even theorize that it's impossible to "sit on the fence"

I suggest you meet and become friends with more homosexuals, what you wrote isn't true at all.

[darkeyes]

I suggest you meet and become friends with more homosexuals, what you wrote isn't true at all.

Me agrees wivya DD..sadly tho..the prob is summa the more gobby 1s tellya quite the opposite.. far 2 many of 'em..

God me dus luff havin big barneys wiv 'em bout it an all..:bigrin:

[_Joe_]

Random thoughts you say.

You know how we as people have our fingers stuck in water and we get the urge to pee.... do sharks get that same urge when they are sneaking up on their prey and their dorsal fins are sticking out of the water?

[Realist]

Joe,

something tells me that you and Mr Varney are a lot alike! Some of the stuff you come up with cracks me up!

DD,

I stick by my experience. Lucky for you, you seem to have had a more enlightened crowd to hang out with. But back in my day, especially in the deep south, there was so much fear of being outted and having harm done done to you. Very few gay, or bisexual people, were as open and verbal about their feelings, then.

I knew one fellow who had harbored an over-powering urge to have an intimate relationship with another guy (me). We were friends for over 6 years, before he finally admitted his urge to do "something". Only after some strong drinks and my admitting I had experienced sexual relationships with other males, did he lose his inhibitions and come out to me.

We had a 10 year long relationship, but it could have been a 16 year one!

[GalacticiaActual]

Thanks for sharing your thoughts Realist!
I find it amazing that the older I get, the better I am able to look back and put the past in a more meaningful perspective.
A few points on me:
1. I was always the most sexually inquisitive kid in the neighborhood. Me and one of my friends would secretly experiment sexually up until we were around 13.
2. In high school, I was relentlessly accused of being gay. The jocks and bullies pushed me around, and emotionally drained my self esteem. I couldn't understand how these people could be so mean. I scrambled to counteract what was happening by constructing an emotional wall, determined to fix or change who I was, or at least keep it well hidden forever. I aligned myself with the burn-out crowd, started smoking, doing drugs. I would cut class and miss school, just so I wouldn't have to deal with seeing these assholes. Of coarse, this finally led to me dropping out of school my junior year. Obviously, looking back now, it was a bad decision. But, it was the only decision that I would entertain at the time.
3. Since I was 16, I've always had a job. I continued to build and maintain my emotional wall, as well as maintain a straight lifestyle with my friends. I've had many girlfriends, of which a few were meaningful relationships. I'm currently in the process of ending my relationship with my gf of 14 years, of which, I too, have lost some of myself through.

One of my favorite phrases is that "time is the fire in which we burn". I have wasted allot of myself in that fire!

[Realist]

I guess most of us burn too much time, trying to figure out what we want, trying to live for others and afraid to reveal our real selves. Like you, I wish I had been more focused on what I really wanted and needed out of life, instead of feeling one way and doing another...just to please those who loved me and thought they knew best...they didn't..

I've loved mostly women, too, and always will but have also had a couple of magnificent relationships with guys, too.

You really do have time to get your act on the right track, but don't fart around, you need to get at it! It only takes a flash in time to get from your age, to mine!

[_Joe_]

But then again, hindsight is always 20/20.

:/