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View Full Version : Ex-Files part 2- Another Side of the coin



Cherokee_Mountaincat
Oct 23, 2008, 4:05 PM
I have been pondering this thread alot as the same question has emerged for me. But out of necessity, not out of love.

In todays economy we all have to do what we can to survive, even if it means trying something that didnt work the first time....

I left my Ex Boyfriend for a myriad of reasons, (lost his job, therefore losing the house we worked so hard to get) and I had been fairly happy living alone. But am in a tiny 10 x 30 room. But now in the light of this economy, I am starting to think that it might come down to having to move back in with him (as room mate status) just to get by. Its damn near impossible to find a decent low income subsidty housing anymore, and the ones I've looked at wouldnt be suitable for any self-respecting rat to dwell in.:soapbox:

I make $637 on Disability, and my rent here in this tiny room is $479, all utilities paid. That doesnt leave me with much..$150. That's for necessities, gas, a small amount of stock for my business, and booth space for my Veterans Memoribilia business. It doesnt go very far, believe me and I guard every penny cautiously.

He has a great job now and is making enough for a 2 bedroom apartment. I would have one room, he would have the other, and we could combine incomes for the rent and utilities. (Cable and internet mainly since the place he's looking into is all uts paid)
It would make sense to be roomies again, not lovers, but from an economic stand point only.

A part of me says "Find a cheap dive and be on your own. Squeeze by the best you can, and take care of yourSelf when the surgery comes up. Your better off alone. So what if solitary women Have been attacked in the city? That's what locked doors are for"

The practical half says, "You'd be better off in a place where your disability can handle not having to go up and down stairs, and not having to fight off roaches and spiders the size of Chihuahua's! And, 1. "you'd have someone to help take care of you when you have your surgery" and 2. "You'd be a hell of alot safer having someone living with you and being with you until you can get healed up properly." (God and Spirits Help the first idiot to jump out at me after my surgery! Beat that Sum Bitch half ta death with my crutches!!!..grrrr Jump out on a poor, defenceless, crippled up Old Lady!!!)
But, I digress....:oh:

So you see Dear Ones, its a Catch 22 situation. I'm damned if I do, doomed if I dont. Its just something I'm pondering at the moment, nothing is concrete at this time. Just trying to think thru all the pro's and Con's before making up my mind.

Thanks for lettin me ramble :}
Your Cat.

csrakate
Oct 23, 2008, 4:32 PM
Oh Cat...sounds as though you are in the midst of quite a dilemma and I know you are struggling to make the right decision. Whatever you decide to do, do what is best for YOU! If you do indeed return to live with your ex, make sure the rules are in place and that he will not waver from them in the least. Also make sure he is aware that it's for convenience sake only....and not a sign that you are coming back to him. From what I have gathered in the short time I have known you, you are a very strong woman who is capable of dealing with any situation that is dealt to you! If you can go back and live with him under the circumstances that you have described, then do so! Your safety is very important. BUT, if you feel that it may put you in a living arrangement that makes you uncomfortable or constantly having to worry about him becoming more dependent on YOU again, then by all means maintain a separate living situation.

Hugs,
Kate