the right to be called a whore

[wutheringheights]

What is it exactly with all of the deleted thread responses?
I just recently started a thread about working in the sex industry and apparently, 'The Mage' called me a whore asking for HIV. I only know about this because it was quoted in another response. Drew had, within less than 24 hours, deleted the Mage's hysterical comments. Now, I am the first to admit the Mage is being a schmuck here, but if someone wants to call me a whore, I say let 'em call me a whore. God knows, it's not as though I haven't been called names before, being a Jewish/Gypsy homosexual and all. I understand the probable rationale behind all of this: people being offended, unnecessarily inflammatory comments and so on.... Sure, but we're all adults here, all, by definition, from some minority group or other.... we've been insulted before, we've endured name-calling. People can be assholes. But I've noticed since I've been back (after an absence of a few weeks) that there are numerous deleted comments in various threads. Personally, if there's someone out there wanting to insult me, I say bring it on, don't censor them. What do the rest of you think?

[darkeyes]

Me agrees wiv ya in essence wutherin...mos peeps know me calls me sel a tart...me m8s call me a tart...jeez..so dus me family.. wot is a tart? Old name for a whore.. now don mean me thinksa mesel as a whore in the strict sensa the word.. have neva taken a penny for sex in me life..(cept mayb from me x hubbie but don think that counts..or dus it???) but funny enuff..me an me m8s often call ourselves that an all... me thinks we ova sensitive these days bout lotsa things... as they say..stiks an stones..an summa those ole time names don haff give ya a giggle... woteva ther origin...

[arana]

THEMAGE wasn't deleted for just calling you a whore. They had the threads bombarded with more attacks, along with starting a thread confessing to be all the names of previous flamers as well as claiming to be another member, the_mage. So there was a lot more to it then just an incidence of name callling. The rules of posting are clear and I believe Drew is trying to keep things under control with the latest attacks to the site. The fact he's catching them at such a quick pace is amazing though. I barely saw this last batch and have missed quite a few others.

[shameless agitator]

THEMAGE wasn't deleted for just calling you a whore. They had the threads bombarded with more attacks, along with starting a thread confessing to be all the names of previous flamers as well as claiming to be another member, the_mage. So there was a lot more to it then just an incidence of name callling. The rules of posting are clear and I believe Drew is trying to keep things under control with the latest attacks to the site. The fact he's catching them at such a quick pace is amazing though. I barely saw this last batch and have missed quite a few others.I'm glad you clarified this Arana. I'd only read the post that got quoted & hadn't noticed the difference in the name, so I was thinking it was the_mage. I was sitting here going WTF?? Did he get phished or what, cause he'd never write shit like that.

[jem_is_bi]

Youre bi whore, not a homo faggot.

OH!! I wish I could get someone to talk dirty to me like that!!!:bigrin:

[shameless agitator]

http://i108.photobucket.com/albums/n31/shamelessagitator/image.jpg

[I'm_Cat_Hon]

Damn, looks like a hell of a post by that one guy. I miss all the fun!..

I personally think Drew is trying to keep a bad situation from becoming a Worse one, and I applaude him for that. Having a group of my own, I know what its like to have your hands full with trying to keep things running smoothly, and keeping things up to date.
Kudo's Drew. :}
Cat

[Delilah]

I second that, Cat. I think Drew is doing a fantastic job. Although it's a cat and mouse game here with Drew VS the troll.
By the way, Shameless... where can I get a button like that? I want to place it on my boss' desk LMAO :tong:

[wutheringheights]

THEMAGE wasn't deleted for just calling you a whore. They had the threads bombarded with more attacks, along with starting a thread confessing to be all the names of previous flamers as well as claiming to be another member, the_mage. So there was a lot more to it then just an incidence of name callling. The rules of posting are clear and I believe Drew is trying to keep things under control with the latest attacks to the site. The fact he's catching them at such a quick pace is amazing though. I barely saw this last batch and have missed quite a few others.

Well, that makes things a little clearer. But the point is one has no way of knowing what's actually going on and what one is actually being called if the posts are deleted, only to turn up in quotation marks in other posts. The one telling me I'm 'bi whore, not homo faggot' was cute... but again very confusing. What was the context? Was there more to the message?
This whole site is getting confusing.

[12voltman59]

What is it exactly with all of the deleted thread responses?
I just recently started a thread about working in the sex industry and apparently, 'The Mage' called me a whore asking for HIV. I only know about this because it was quoted in another response. Drew had, within less than 24 hours, deleted the Mage's hysterical comments. Now, I am the first to admit the Mage is being a schmuck here, but if someone wants to call me a whore, I say let 'em call me a whore. God knows, it's not as though I haven't been called names before, being a Jewish/Gypsy homosexual and all. I understand the probable rationale behind all of this: people being offended, unnecessarily inflammatory comments and so on.... Sure, but we're all adults here, all, by definition, from some minority group or other.... we've been insulted before, we've endured name-calling. People can be assholes. But I've noticed since I've been back (after an absence of a few weeks) that there are numerous deleted comments in various threads. Personally, if there's someone out there wanting to insult me, I say bring it on, don't censor them. What do the rest of you think?

The person you spoke of is yet one more name that some person has been starting on here in recent months--they will do what I call "drive by posts" and put up all kinds of stupid shit---it is always the same pattern--the person joins-has not much in their profile and in a few hours time--goes and both starts threads that are designed to inflame things and also posts some assinine comments on just about every thread--with the comments having certain common denominators--among them---rallying on how sick everyone here is--that they are sluts and sick with AIDS that need to die and oh yeah--something totally non-sexual seems to get posted too--like that "global warming is a myth!!"

I see that there were two posts by "disseminator2" that were deleted by Drew--since someone quoted one of those comments in their post--I see the same shit--so its got to be the same idiot---

What this person seems to be doing now is to go through the membership list of the site and finds profiles where the people might have once posted here alot and they no longer do--he changes the names a bit so they are familiar-that is why there is some confusion--at first look--you think that someone you once chatted with is back and you are happy to see them--then this "person" goes and starts making their fucked up posts- posting his crap under those names--thankfully Drew or whoever is running this site is paying attention now and those posts and profiles get deleted almost as soon as they are created.

This person sure has an issue with this site and is obviously spending a great deal of time to go through the member lists looking for names he can modify for his various alter egos---I say to this person---"Dude---get your sorry self a life--stop spending so much time on here and go get yourself some therapy--you sure as hell are in need of it!"

For a time there--I was getting both bummed and pissed that this was happening--now I think it is kinda funny and you do have to feel very sorry for someone who does something like this--it is one thing that it happened once, twice, three times--but iit does keep going and going and going.....

This is one very sad and mixed up individual!!

I just read Arana's post above-I had not read that when I first posted this-it is interesting that the person had put up a thread admitting all of the crazy posts had been done by the same person-I would like to have read that--I would like to see if my suspicion about who the "perp' of them is the one person I think this has to be is on the mark--I am sorry I missed that---DAMN!!!

[12voltman59]

Interesting----

I went back and looked at who sent me the "nasty gram" email message----and it was 'disseminator2" who is obviously the person who is sending all of these "flamer" messages.

Here is the message this person sent me:


"Your post about incest is FUCKING sick! As a survivor of incest trust me its not
something you want to go through.

Incest is WRONG no matter who it is done with! Do you really believe those
stories? You know it's erotic FICTION right? Fucking idiot...."


I am wondering if what this person says in this message is perhaps some of the first truth this person has said to us--perhaps this person is a victim of sexual abuse--it would answer a great deal---he and I really do think it is a he----obviously has issues with this site and the people here--but like in most things--it has nothing to to with this site and the people here but more to do with what is going on with this person and what is going on----I would bet that he was sexually molested as a child and has never appopriately or adequately dealt with those issues----these attacks this person is making on this site is one way that he is lashing back at the world and those who he equates with his abuser or abusers and is his way of trying to deal with his situation.

That he did start a thread that he admitted he was the same person is at least some progress--but I would in all seriousness and out of concern for a fellow human being in obvious pain---as obnoxious and oft putting as the actions of this person make him be---I really do say to you---stop spending your time attacking this site and spend that energy in trying to find yourself some therapy to deal with what you have been through--and if your message to me was yet another fabrication---as is your assumption of all of these misleading names--it is still very indicative that you do need to engage in therapy.



I may be wrong about this--but I suspect not----

[shameless agitator]

I second that, Cat. I think Drew is doing a fantastic job. Although it's a cat and mouse game here with Drew VS the troll.
By the way, Shameless... where can I get a button like that? I want to place it on my boss' desk LMAO :tong:I wish I knew! I just got the image from am email Jen sent me with a bunch of them. I'm trying to find a place that sells them. I'll share the info when I get it.

[The Barefoot Contess]

In response to the OP, I see what you are saying, but I also think people should also have the right to not be called a whore.

I think people should have every right to argue and try to convince people of their views. But I think public debates should be respectful, which means that you present your ideas in a reasoned and logical fashion without personally attacking your opponents. If in your private life you'd rather people said to you the first thing that comes to their minds, insults included, fine, it is your private life, but I think that in a public forum, the moment you break the rules of the game (see "posting rules"), you lose the right to play. If someone wants to grill you, he or she can send you a private message.

Deleting those messages is not, in my opinion, a question of censorship, but one of making sure that people have a "safe" space where they can freely speak without fear of being insulted because of their opinions.

[wutheringheights]

Since starting this thread, a number of responses have clarified a few things for me about what is actually going on, Voltman's responses in particular. I hadn't initially realized there was a single nefarious character attempting to utilize other identities to create havoc. I started the thread essentially because I found it perplexing to read partial quotes from hate-responses that had been deleted. I figure it's pretty much resolved now. Thanks everyone.

[*pan*]

whore ? hmmmm, well guess i'm a whore by definition too lol. the problem today seems to be whoever deems a thing unacceptable tries to erase it or change it, the same mentality is whats keeping the the gay movement from moving out into the open, many think it is unspeakable, so in many fourms the subject is deleted, hmmm. sounds like censership to me. what ever happened to the freedom of speach. i think people are to sensivitive especialy people involved in such a diverse and controversital lifestyle as being bisexual. hell even a lot of homosexuals don't like bisexuals calling us liers and that were just gays using another lable lol. i say let the treads through so we can see just how some think. like you said we are supposed to be adults so we should not be shocked when we read something that isnt popular, what is right isnt always popular and what is popular isnt always right. people tend to be herd animals and want to go with the flow and whats popular for others in their community , to be approved by the rest of the community, a pat on the back so to speak. i am an adult, a loner and a free thinker which sets me apart from popular thinking. i do what i feel is right for me not what everyone else thinks is right. and if theri so sensitive that they dont want to read or hear truth or comments about someone maby the should goto one of the censored sites where their little sensitive feelings wont be hurt. when someone posts a topic or subject the open themselves to critisism and scorn, i mean if you post something stupid then people have a right to call you stupid. lets be real here and open our minds to the truth which is the only way we learn what our worth is to others and how we stand within the community.
p.s. please excuse the spelling my keyboard hasn't learned to spell yet. :eek:

ever notice how the people sending the deleted comments have no profile, information or pics, ect ... , is this a coincidence or what lol.

[Cesca]

It is a turn on to be called a whore be spoken to as a slut when making love. My partner does it so very well. I find it a little more difficult to do it in return but am getting better at it.

It isnt quite so nice to have such words thrown at us in reality however, and it hurts a great deal. Especially when thrown at us by someone we love and have known all our lives. In this I am thinking of my mother who has called me that and worse because of my lifestyle choices, my partner and my opinions on sex and sexuality. If only people realised the hurt and harm they do. Sticks and stones may break no bones but we all have feelings which are often very fragile.

[**Peg**]

What is it exactly with all of the deleted thread responses?...... What do the rest of you think?

wow **I** think that Drew can't win: if he deletes the "hysterical" postings he might be accused of censoring and if he DOESN'T, he's accused of either not "doing his job", or "MIA".

It has been previously noted that the s**t disturber presently plaguing the forum DELIBERATELY creates a new profile which closely resembles a "regular" chatter... hence more people will read the posting.

as a former moderator myself, I think Drew is doing a great job of keeping on top of things. Deleting posts occurs for a reason, and if I've said it once, guess I have to say it again .... read the agreement when you sign up. Clearly it states that posters may not engage in inflammatory language, etcetc.

**Peg**

[allbimyself]

I would like to make one point on this matter. I've brought it up in previous threads but it has been awhile so I'll do it again...

The whole "freedom of speech" argument as relates to the deleting and/or editing of posts on a privately owned website is a bogus argument. Freedom of speech laws and amendments that many of us benefit from in our countries have NOTHING at all to do with how Drew, or any other website owner, runs HIS site. Freedom of speech ONLY exists to prevent the government and government entities from restricted the voice of the people. It does NOT apply here.

Would you allow someone that came into your home and spewed hate to remain or return? Probably not. Even if you did, surely you wouldn't demand that others be as tolerant in their own homes. This is the closer analogy. This site belongs to Drew not the government. As such he can restrict what is posted here. That's HIS RIGHT.

There are plenty of avenues for those that want to spew hate to do so. Let them go there.

If your sense of "fair play" or whatever finds it abhorrent that Drew doesn't let anyone say anything they want on HIS website, you can best protest by leaving, too.

[wutheringheights]

I would like to make one point on this matter. I've brought it up in previous threads but it has been awhile so I'll do it again...

The whole "freedom of speech" argument as relates to the deleting and/or editing of posts on a privately owned website is a bogus argument. Freedom of speech laws and amendments that many of us benefit from in our countries have NOTHING at all to do with how Drew, or any other website owner, runs HIS site. Freedom of speech ONLY exists to prevent the government and government entities from restricted the voice of the people. It does NOT apply here.

Would you allow someone that came into your home and spewed hate to remain or return? Probably not. Even if you did, surely you wouldn't demand that others be as tolerant in their own homes. This is the closer analogy. This site belongs to Drew not the government. As such he can restrict what is posted here. That's HIS RIGHT.

There are plenty of avenues for those that want to spew hate to do so. Let them go there.

If your sense of "fair play" or whatever finds it abhorrent that Drew doesn't let anyone say anything they want on HIS website, you can best protest by leaving, too.

Calm down.
You may or may not have noticed that since my initial thread post, I have included not one but two more clarifying why I started the thread. I was confused by the sudden spate of deleted posts, parts of which were turning up in quotation marks in other responses. I had not been aware of the Disseminator 2 controversy, but now that I am, the issue is pretty much resolved as far as I'm concerned. Furthermore, I don't believe that I have in any way attacked or even criticized Drew. In my initial post, I simply stated that I would prefer the opportunity to respond (or not respond) to flamers before their posts were removed. I don't believe I made any reference to 'censorship'. Sheesshh, why is everyone so quick to fly off the handle?

[allbimyself]

Calm down.
You may or may not have noticed that since my initial thread post, I have included not one but two more clarifying why I started the thread. I was confused by the sudden spate of deleted posts, parts of which were turning up in quotation marks in other responses. I had not been aware of the Disseminator 2 controversy, but now that I am, the issue is pretty much resolved as far as I'm concerned. Furthermore, I don't believe that I have in any way attacked or even criticized Drew. In my initial post, I simply stated that I would prefer the opportunity to respond (or not respond) to flamers before their posts were removed. I don't believe I made any reference to 'censorship'. Sheesshh, why is everyone so quick to fly off the handle?I was perfectly calm. Think you are the one that needs to calm down. Why are you so quick to ASSume that my post was directed at you?
Obviously it wasn't.

[viajero]

This is not about censorship. Drew is right to ban this user as many times as he can. I started a thread about hate email and now I realize the guy has attacked the site from every angle. Drew is trying to keep him from driving away legitimate posters who may be new to the idea of bisexuality and this site could be one of their first experiences. The fact that he is impersonating others make it all that more effective.

I say we stick together like the family of bi-whores and faggots we are. There I said it!

[csrakate]

One other thing we need to nip in the bud right now is how this perp has managed to get us all flying off the handle in odd directions when we feel we are being targeted by a post. I am just as guilty of it myself..having recently felt that certain comments were directed at me instead of as a manner of continuing an on going debate. Let's all take a deep breath here and remember that we need to read carefully before responding...and to assume is a very big mistake. I just learned it myself and I urge others to do the same. We need to do as viajero just suggested and stick together. Let's not let the silly and immature postings of a troll divide us as a community. And remember, the more attention we give this attention whore, the more he gets off on it!

Hugs,
Kate

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

Hey! I'm not a whore, I dont charge for my fun. I'm a SLUT, thank you very much!!!! lol

Sensuous
Luchious
Ultimately
Talented

Yep, that there be me. lol
Silly Cat

[wutheringheights]

I was perfectly calm. Think you are the one that needs to calm down. Why are you so quick to ASSume that my post was directed at you?
Obviously it wasn't.

So I was wrong. Sorry if I misunderstood. However, it wasn't necessarily all that clear at whom the post was directed. Since I started the thread and you seemed to be responding to a single person, I don't think it was all that reckless of me to think you were addressing me. But cool, I made a mistake.
Let's be friends.

[wutheringheights]

One other thing we need to nip in the bud right now is how this perp has managed to get us all flying off the handle in odd directions when we feel we are being targeted by a post. I am just as guilty of it myself..having recently felt that certain comments were directed at me instead of as a manner of continuing an on going debate. Let's all take a deep breath here and remember that we need to read carefully before responding...and to assume is a very big mistake. I just learned it myself and I urge others to do the same. We need to do as viajero just suggested and stick together.

Hugs,
Kate

Yeah, I'm glad we came to an understanding, Kate. I really do prefer to be friends with people and I'm not into conflict for conflict's sake. Hopefully, we'll see each other around on the site some more and you can continue challenging me. LOL
(This post of course refers partly to a different thread. Kate knows what I'm talking about.)

[jem_is_bi]

Hey! I'm not a whore, I dont charge for my fun. I'm a SLUT, thank you very much!!!! lol

Sensuous
Luchious
Ultimately
Talented

Yep, that there be me. lol
Silly Cat

I like SLUTS!
Because, I will only ever be one as fantasy makes you even more special.