Discrimination rant

[thesea]

I cant even think what to say I'm so mad!

Ok people have prejudices but cant they consider for a min that they might be looking at this the wrong way? http://www.shybi.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=21093&hl=

Bad enough so many lesbians discriminate against bis, horrible to see how some bi women feel about bi men :(

Whats to be done?

[darkeyes]

Am a lesbian hun.. but am not sure wetha its the kinda discrimination that yas imaginin it 2 b..read it as 1 girls taste... we all hav diff tastes..diff needs. If she wos discriminatin cos of is lifestyle, an bein condemnatory then me b 1st on the barricades 2 support the guy...but we do like diff things.. sum like blonde, sum brunette sum red,...sum like blue eyes, sum brown sum green.. sum like guys..sum like me gals... sum like bi gals sum bi guys.. an sum don...its a matta of taste an wot an who we fancy... lotsa kindsa peeps u wudn fancy...ers is bi guys..an ya cant legislate for peeps taste...:female:

[TaylorMade]

If you read further into the thread, the claws do come out against the fellas. It breaks my heart, really.

*Taylor*

[shameless agitator]

I only read the first page and a half or so, and for the most part it seemed like the only ones who wouldn't date bi men were the ones who wouldn't date men at all. C'est La Vie. The ones who find mm sex a turn-off I have no problem with. We all have our own personal tastes. The only ones who pissed me off were the ones who said a bi man wouldn't be able to be monogamous. Those seemed to be lesbians who thought bis were just confused though, so again, what the fuck? This is nothing we're not all used to dealing with anyway. It just makes me wonder why they're on the board in the first place if they don't believe bisexuality exists.

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

In the words of my generation, "Different strokes for different follks" Darlin.
Dont get yerself all riled up over another person's opinion, just live your life happy and free..free to think and do and Be as You please.
Dont sweat the small stuff in life, Hon. Life's too short for it. :}
Cat

[Lateralus]

Don't get angry. Look at all the married bi guy/girls on this site, not to mention the bi girls on this site who would date, even prefer a bi guy. There are plenty of openly bi guys out there who have no problem getting girls, straight or bi. Check this post out http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=5184 . It put a smile on my face when I read it.

;)

[12voltman59]

It seems as the opinons on the subject with the ladies of that site are as diverse and all over the map as they are here----no real surprise that is the case--thanks for the post--I found it interesting.

[darkeyes]

It seems as the opinons on the subject with the ladies of that site are as diverse and all over the map as they are here----no real surprise that is the case--thanks for the post--I found it interesting.
Nowt new ther then Voltie..big surprise is peeps gettin hot unda the colla bout it...:tong:

[the mage]

It is a statical reality that the vast majority of women and men too, do not enjoy seeing hearing or smelling gay sex. Bi sex is gay sex.

The world does not revolve around your genitals. Most people just don't want to know. Period....

Find the ones who do.

[thesea]

Just annoys me that they think that ideas like:

bi men are less able to commit, cheat more, have more stis, kinda gross and confused and just secretly gay

are truth and don't acknowledge they are prejudices, the same prejudices any queer people encounter, can we not stick together at least!?

I know these ideas are from recent and current culture, it's the girls that won't for a min consider they are looking at it strangely that make me frustrated..

I met bfs parents the other night, felt keen to tell them the truth of where we met, at a bi group and that we are poly, that I have other important people, who I am and we are with out so much clever editing, I would be scared to tell my folks if I was a bi man as I would people in general. If bi girls cant even avoid discrimination how will we get to a time when the culture is mostly accepting?

[Germanicus]

If you stick around long enough, this thread/topic will undoubtedly come up again at some point.

You have to ask yourself why some people posted the hostile/ignorant comments when, as Bi women, they should have (in theory) some sympathy.

Perhaps they are just sexist or perhaps they have just sucked up a lot of ideology regarding gender/sexuality and just regurgitate it without thinking. This sort of unthinking dogma and "cant" really turns me off sexual politics since for many its little more than an ideological zimmer frame to prop themselves up against because they are chewed up by their own self-loathing, and then use it as some sort of empirical justification for their own views. If Bi men repeated the same about Bi women, what do you think these women would say?

After a while it gets boring, and these ideologues are best ignored.

[Delilah]

Oooh! Well said! I can't add anymore to that. :three:



In the words of my generation, "Different strokes for different follks" Darlin.
Dont get yerself all riled up over another person's opinion, just live your life happy and free..free to think and do and Be as You please.
Dont sweat the small stuff in life, Hon. Life's too short for it. :}
Cat

[Long Duck Dong]

I am curious.....why is it discrimination to express a personal opinion in a forum ???

I saw people expressing a opinion......a opinion I may not share....but a opinion, none the less

if we decide people in another forum expressing a opinion, is wrong and discriminatory.....then we better have a close look at bisexual.com and everybody in it...cos we express opinions too

I am glad that those people feel free to express their opinion......its good to be able to talk openly.........but its only a matter of time before we lose that right, as the push for equal rights and anti discrimination gets too far out of hand

[thesea]

I don't think saying bi guys are unable to commit and secretly gay an opinion it's just prejudice.

[Long Duck Dong]

and in a lot of cases it could be true...... not all bi guys but some of them.... so the statements bear the ring of truth

[runewlf]

Opinions, everyone has one, just like other certain body parts. I got tired of letting people, even people that should feel differently, affect my mood. They leave me alone, I leave them alone.

[Bluebiyou]

Holy shit!
I just finished watching History Channel (2 hours or so) review of KKK.
Damn.
You know, after hearing the preaching of the KKK, I hate Jews, blacks, Catholics, bisexual... I mean homosexuals....
...wait a minute... I'm two out of four of those...
But da---------mn... the KKK just keeps reforming and resurrecting...
...you know... we merely assume we've come so far... and that most people are like us...
You scream in your mind... "This is 2008 for God's sake, not 1955!"
damn sociopaths... should be put to death at birth!
Oh, wait... this morality thing is really difficult!

[Randypan]

Death to all extremists! :bigrin::tong:

[nothings5d]

I was recently walking with a group of friends and the way the topic was drifting I realized that the one person in the group who didn't know I was bi might be getting confused and so I told her that I was bi and her first response was "Just don't hit on me." My friends asked her why she had that attitude and her answer was that basically she wouldn't know how to relate to a boyfriend that was interested in guys. It sounded like a bit of a cop out to me, but I didn't push it.

I guess some people just can't wrap their minds around anything that is different from what they normally encounter.

[Bluebiyou]

Holy shit!
I just finished watching History Channel (2 hours or so) review of KKK...


Sorry, history of NAZI and KKK...

[void()]

"bi men are less able to commit, cheat more, have more stis, kinda gross and confused and just secretly gay"


Less able to commit --- see my wife of nine years.

Cheat more ---- working to support family, loving wife and now a boyfriend that wife knows about and approves ... cheat more indeed. Sorry, I do not cheat, period. Nor do I help cheaters cheat. I'm a one one woman man, and a one man, man.

More stis? I'll take it they meant stds. I give blood and work in the food service industry. In fact where I work we have friendly albeit sneaky and crafty USDA inspectors, who delight in ensuring we DO NOT cross contaminate, and do frequent background checks for biological issues on all the employees. So, no stds are afforded here. Once had crabs, but that was not transmitted sexually.

Someone had lived with us a bit, and they had lice. Which unfortunately when lice hop off unwrapped articles of clothing that the infested person has worn and attack a new host, is what crabs are. Lice love dark and warm body areas. RID kills the bastards. A couple good hot showers later, no more crabs.


kinda gross and confused and just secretly gay ---- Yeah, I'm secretly half gay. But I'm also secretly half straight. Damn, now my cover is blown. Anyone care to further blow me? Drat, talking about sex is gross. But I'm talking about sex with mature consenting adults, so it's not gross, merely seen as a natural part of living and being human. Fuck me running, now I'm all confused. Someone help me, I'm having trouble deciding to not decide.

Okay, here it is simple terms, viola the Neapolitan ice cream analogy ---

Some folks they like chocolate ice cream, so they only eat chocolate ice cream. That's well and good, yes it is.

Some other folks, they like only vanilla ice cream and that's all they'll eat. Again, all is well and good here.

Other folks still only like and eat strawberry ice cream. You guessed it, all well and good.

Then you got these weird folks who like all three ice cream flavors. Now, so far all these folks, the ones liking chocolate, vanilla, strawberry, have all been well and good. No one says there's anything wrong with their needs or desires. But, look what happens when you got these folks who love all three flavors, together. Everyone throws fits, goes stark raving mad I say! They tell us to like all three flavors is terrible wrong, it makes the cosmos screech to a halt, chaos reigns!

What happened to well and good? Why doesn't the same logic apply to someone that likes three flavors, that likes one?

Confused? Only if you listen to the bigoted codswallop of asinine twats who can't see beyond their own noses.

No, I am not confused. Sometimes I prefer making love to a man, or being made love to from a man. Other times I prefer making love to, or being made love to from/by a woman. It all depends on my emotional, physical, spiritual feeling of that given moment, which I desire. And love isn't confusing either. I love my boyfriend and wife, or wife and boyfriend. See, that's simple enough.

Which do I love more, or less? Neither one.

How do I love them? Unconditionally and eternally.

Lesbian gals dating bi guys? Oh, how sick! Everyone knows lesbians are ...

See, it goes both ways. Apologies, I do know quite a few lesbians. I think they're pretty neat folks. Would I date a lesbian? Well no, but then I'm a one woman man and already married to that one woman, sorry.

If i wasn't married? Sure would.

[fairbankswingers]

:female: I am not into watching Roger with other men, and even when we are swinging and MMF comes up I dont mind if he gets to play with the other guy, but he knows not to ask me to "suck cock with him" or watch when the other guy is giving him anal sex. I know he enjoys all of it, and is a bottom, and I love Roger very mucxh, but I really do not like seeing MM. When we are swinging with a couple I have no issues with watching him with another woman, and I know he loves watching me with another person, but to be honest the few times I have been with a woman I prefer him not to be watching as well. But to be honest I know he is totally bi, and I know he loves me deeply, and have no issues with him being with another man as long as it is safe, sane and the other guy is also in a committed relationship.

edit:
as far as committing me and Roger have been Married 16 years on 9/18/08, as for STDs we are as concerned as anyone and only play safe, partners and us are tested, and like I said Roger only plays with married bi men who have wives who support and know and we all agree on boundries, and all agree to be up front and honest with each other. We sometime drag the first meeting out in order to make sure the couple really is wanting to me and it is not someone just looking for sex.

[elian]

Confused? Only if you listen to the bigoted codswallop of asinine twats who can't see beyond their own noses.


Twats?? Noses?? <giggles> You did that on purpose didn't you - <evil grin>

I am still confused, at times - but I'm getting better. I have to admit that coming from a divorced family myself I'm not comfortable with "Oh, my wife and I are married - but I need to get laid on the side because she doesn't meet my needs - can we go screw in some anonymous hotel or back alley?" either.

I lament alternative sexuality sometimes because it DOES seem more promiscuous to me - I fight with myself very hard trying to figure out if I could still be just "straight and happy" - not have to deal with the social stigma - trying to figure out if I did that could I live without a man - or would *I* be the one trying to cheat one day.

Rather than get into all of that I went solitary - forgoing the pleasure of companionship at times feeling selfish that I haven't shared the best years of my life with someone else. It was a hard, lonely road - just sort of felt like I never fit in as was helped by numerous abusive male role models who assured me I would never amount to anything because I was not competitive enough.

I guess I should be GLAD to have been so conflicted and desiring of males, otherwise I probably would have written them off years ago - but the feeling of actually being in the arms of a man changed my world - it never occurred to me that they could be loving and intimate too..in the rural place I grew up you'd never see that outside of the bedroom.

I think what I'm starting to see is more and more we are all "just human" - full of paradoxes. There's no one person who can be a "knight in shining armor" all of the time..to expect that is unrealistic. We all walk tall, stumble, fall, live, learn, laugh, cry, love..and it doesn't matter so much what's between the legs, at least not to me - but for now I do still feel more comfortable with men for some reason.

As far as bigots go - prejudice seems to know no bounds - one of the first gay guys I tried to date was an older gentleman who was still of the opinion that women needed to stay off the road and that the world would be a lot better without them..

"But, you have a mother", says I

"My mother was manic depressive, she's probably the REASON I'm gay", says he

"But, you're gay - you didn't ASK to be born that way .. just like someone didn't ASK to be born female..", says I

<no response - grumble grumble>, says he



So, the moral of the story is, it is sad and frustrating but people employ neural networks - they love to sort, classify and label things. It works pretty good for say - "a big tiger coming this way - react quickly" but perhaps is a bit lost on the finer points of our society.

..and yeah, I agree with other thread that homophobia has a lot to do with self-hatred. If you really loved yourself and were secure in your own right to exist, self image and sexuality maybe you don't feel so threatened.

[void()]

Twats?? Noses?? <giggles> You did that on purpose didn't you - <evil grin>

Would I do something like that? <attempts to feign a bewildered and innocent expression>


I think what I'm starting to see is more and more we are all "just human" - full of paradoxes. There's no one person who can be a "knight in shining armor" all of the time..to expect that is unrealistic. We all walk tall, stumble, fall, live, learn, laugh, cry, love..and it doesn't matter so much what's between the legs

..and yeah, I agree with other thread that homophobia has a lot to do with self-hatred. If you really loved yourself and were secure in your own right to exist, self image and sexuality maybe you don't feel so threatened.


Glad you woke up, baby. Wrappers, book covers really do not lend much if anything to the contents.

[rissababynta]

Here's a theory...


Men suck, whether they are bi or not (little bit of a pun there...).



Just kidding hehe. Couldn't help myself there.