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ambi53mm
Apr 1, 2008, 7:50 AM
Between the fluctuations of my sex drive in general and the fluctuations of attractions towards both genders specifically…sometimes I feel like I’m on a perpetual roller coaster. Ups and downs, sharp turns this way and that, and all in the passing of a moment. They move with little resistance and usually a total lack of control. There seems to be no other trigger than the free flowing and capricious whims of my own thoughts….. Moments of gratification with either or both….and then the cycles repeat themselves as my ride continues. Life was easier when the only thing to attract my attention was the opposite sex. Sure there were those occasional bouts of sexual fantasy towards the same sex. Some times realized…sometimes not…but those simpler times have long since past… but also past is that once closed mind-set that has led to and allowed to flourish this newly acquired freedom.

These fluctuations seem to range in intensity from a subtle gentle shift to a whirlwind sometimes with in the confines of a single day. There is something about the night that seems to accentuate and enhance these shifts to extremes…maybe because my mind has the freedom to dwell where it chooses unrestrained…I don’t understand but observe with lucidity as my focus shifts and accepts the nature of the beast. How do you find balance with these fluctuations?..….Does it ever end?…..Am I alone? :eek:

Ambi:)

wolfcamp
Apr 1, 2008, 8:44 AM
ambi53mm

Your post defines the reasons that I stick around this place, right down to the questions at the end. You captured it quite well.

Wolfcamp

the mage
Apr 1, 2008, 8:58 AM
Alone..no.. not in the seeking of satisfaction of your desires.

Among the few?? Yes.

Lets avoid the discussion of avoiding sex here..

A high sex drive will pull you in cycles, and it will for many years to cum.

A satisfactory outlet is often a long and confusing search, do it safely but do it.

allbimyself
Apr 1, 2008, 10:10 AM
I'm sorry, I really don't want to hear your gas problems or about them.

Uh, Emily, that's "fluctuations."

Oh! Nevermind.

12voltman59
Apr 1, 2008, 10:13 AM
These fluctuations seem to range in intensity from a subtle gentle shift to a whirlwind sometimes with in the confines of a single day. There is something about the night that seems to accentuate and enhance these shifts to extremes…maybe because my mind has the freedom to dwell where it chooses unrestrained…I don’t understand but observe with lucidity as my focus shifts and accepts the nature of the beast. How do you find balance with these fluctuations?..….Does it ever end?…..Am I alone? :eek:

Ambi:)

You are not alone in feeling this way---for me--the degree of my desires for sex of any kind is more related to the seasons and for some reason---I am most "fired up" when the temperatures and humidity are both higher. When I lived down in Florida---"my engine was always running at high idle!!"

BiphobiaFighter
Apr 1, 2008, 6:18 PM
I've been having particularly strong heterosexual attractions lately for some reason. For most of last year it had definitely gone into the background when I became strongly attracted to one man (unfortunately he lived too far away).

I think that my sexuality itself is relatively stable but the quality of the representatives of particular sexes in my life at a particular time determine how much time I spend thinking of that particular sex.

They haven't fluctuated in the course of a day, though.

ambi53mm
Apr 1, 2008, 7:51 PM
I'm wondering also if this more of a male thing as opposed to something shared by both genders??

Ambi:)

the mage
Apr 2, 2008, 3:47 PM
Do women not cycle thru phases of horny monthly?

My womans cycle drives me nuts every 4 weeks on schedule..

ChelleNYC78
Apr 6, 2008, 8:49 PM
Do women not cycle thru phases of horny monthly?

My womans cycle drives me nuts every 4 weeks on schedule..the same with me - every other month or so my my desire for intimacy intensifies as my cycle approaches -

but since the OP is a male i'd like to say that he is not alone - in the last couple of years it has been impressed upon me that diet also has some influence on the sex drive of humans - especially certain herbs (i think it's gingko biloba) - also thru meditation/quiet contemplation i personally find when i shift up and down the kinsey scale it's usually a result of my insecurities and/or the media i'm exposed to

ambi53mm
Apr 7, 2008, 7:29 AM
i personally find when i shift up and down the kinsey scale it's usually a result of my insecurities and/or the media i'm exposed to

Yes and this really comes closest to the subject matter of the fluctuations I was referring to. The sex drive in general ebbs and flows at different levels of intensity and kind of serves as the fuel for the latter. Low sex drive and my focus lacks direction towards either gender specifically, as that energy is redirected towards other needs and wants that are occurring.
This is more along the line of having an ice cream cone in both hands…one chocolate...one vanilla….and I enjoy both flavors. I choose one to lick and that gratifies my wants for the moment but then the shift and now the desire for the other takes over until its been gratified…these fluctuations as to which one to lick at a given moment are the type of fluctuations I was referring to . if my sex drive in general is running strong then they flirt back and forth more rapidly…and media at least to some extent does effect especially if it’s porn…as I transfer from giver to receiver regardless of the gender…and I mention this only because my very limited porn collection is all heterosexual oriented.
Also, the energy is very raw…and very visual,.. whether being played out on a screen or in the minds eye. The Kinsey scale would be relevant to the moment and can slide from 1-7 sometimes in the course of a day depending on how much fuel I’m carrying…and how far I feel like driving.
LOL Now I suppose some could argue well why not have both at the same time…been there and done that…but this is a little different and seems to happen more on an inner level.

Thanks to all that responded…it’s given me a lot to think about:)

Ambi:)

Bluebiyou
Apr 10, 2008, 6:56 AM
I think we used to call this sort of stuff 'biorhythms'... for those of us who like labels...
:)
... and there's no one to 'do your colors' anymore, either!
I think we lost a couple good things from the 80s...
...lost a few bad things as well...
It's those pounds I've gained since 2000 that really piss me off...

C'est la vie!

Michelle_87
Apr 10, 2008, 7:44 PM
You are not alone; I have those exact same feelings. When I was single, sometimes I would want men, and other times I would want women. I'm not sure what determined it, but it would fluctuate constantly. Now, being in a long term relationship complicates things for me. I love my boyfriend, and I would never be unfaithful to him, but often I find myself wanting women sexually instead of a male. There's not really much I can do about this since I'm not willing to bring another person into the mix and I want to stay with him. He knows I'm Bi, but I'm not really sure how to talk about this with him, for fear of hurting his feelings or making him feel uncomfortable or inadequate.