OK.. So just exactly what is the "Bi Experience"

[ambi53mm]

While reading the thread about “First Bi Experiences” You can’t help to notice that for most of us ( I’ve answered this in the past.) we relate about our first same-sex experiences. OK…so what differentiates your first “Bi experience” from say your first same sex experience or, are they one in the same? If someone was homosexual and never had an experience or attraction sexually with the opposite sex would this not be one in the same? Does it become your first “Bi experience” only when you’ve had an experience with the opposite sex to compare it too.
Does a “Bi experience” first occur when you’ve had sex with both genders at the same time or when you’ve had sex with one gender today, and a different gender tomorrow and find yourself going back and forth? Or is the "Bi experience" when you’ve been attracted to the opposite sex all your life and suddenly discover that you’re attracted to the same sex as well? What is the “Bi Experience”?
I think I’m beginning to understand why some people have issues with labels…but then is it any easier to just lump all of humanity into “those that are bisexual” and the rest as are non-bisexual: Us vs Them?
……..One things for damn sure. It’s Monday Morning and way too early to be asking these questions without a cup of coffee.

Please feel free to disregard LOL
Ambi:)

[Germanicus]

Its whatever *you* want it to mean

[Orlando157]

I'd suggest trying all the above just to be sure you do have a bisexual experience and then pick the ones you like best ..... if you need help let me know :)

[ambi53mm]

LOL Thanks for the clarifications...hard to disagree with that logic.

Ambi :cop::stoned::cop:

[Orlando157]

LOL - Never confuse logic with experience - Both have value in their own way - May I ask is it true what they say about banjo players?

[folk2punk]

Its the moment when you truly realize that the plumbing doesnt matter.

[ambi53mm]

May I ask is it true what they say about banjo players?

LOL OK I'm game..What do they say about about Banjo players?

Ambi

[AmeMahoney]

I always knew I was attracted to females and males, although I only dated guys. It took me years to realize that all those attractions for females was because I am bi, and another few years before I actually did anything physically about it.

[BiphobiaFighter]

When I was lurking here, I was interested in the use of the phrase "bi experience". I could take that phrase to mean a sexual experience with at least two other people of two distinct sexes, personally. Which hasn't happened for me yet (or any other kind of sex as I am a virgin). I could also take it to mean an experience relating to bisexuality such as being told we don't exist, for example (I don't think it has to be sexual in nature).

[jazz5]

To me that is like saying what is "making love." Once a g/f that said to me there was making love, fucking and having sex all with a different meaning.

So what is a bi experience? Making love to another of the same sex? Some people do as they are actually attracted to the same sex as well as the opposite. Just just plain fucking (or sucking) mean that you are bi sexual? I guess so. How about not being attracted to same sex but enjoy having sex with the same sex?

Personnally I enjoy my friends and if it is a male and he likes to suck or be sucked and it involves me so much for the better. Whether I "have the label" I don't know personally I think of myself as Trysexual.

[the mage]

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...
perhaps its the first time you have homosexual sex because you have found you like it, and want it, and not just "gettin some" from a warm body?

[diB4u]

Hmm well maybe it means how many bisexual partners and relationships a persons had.

I personally havent really had any relationships with other women, although there is a woman that I really really want to, infact the person frequence this board and I have very strong feelings for her.

You know who you are right?


I've had sex with a few women, but not on a woman to woman basis, so thats why untill i do, i class myself as bicurious. Saying that I've been the same for years.... When I was younger i used to fanstasies to page 3 photos.

So i dont know.. Anyone wanna help me here?

Jaz5 your correct I've never made love to a woman, I've done stuff with or to more like having sex with...

Maybe for me its an emotional commitment.

[DiamondDog]

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...
perhaps its the first time you have homosexual sex because you have found you like it, and want it, and not just "gettin some" from a warm body?

HA! Ok this just proves something about you.

It can mean whatever you want it to mean, sex doesn't have to be involved at all.

Some people like myself were emotional and sexual with the same gender long before we actually had sex, romantic feelings, or got sexual with the opposite gender.

[jem_is_bi]

I have had sex with women. But that did not feel like a bisexual experience.
I have had sex with men. That has never feel like a bisexual experience either.
I mostly fantasize about sex with men. No, that does not feel like a bisexual experience.
Sometimes, I just cannot help noticing a really hot woman. But, again, no bisexual experience.

Yet, even though I never have had a bisexual experience, I feel like a bisexual person.

JEM

[the mage]

HA! Ok this just proves something about you.

It can mean whatever you want it to mean, sex doesn't have to be involved at all.

Some people like myself were emotional and sexual with the same gender long before we actually had sex, romantic feelings, or got sexual with the opposite gender.


...........................Seriously,,dOOd,,,,it means I have an opinion and am able to toss it out there for thought,, is what it proves.

Geeze relax will ya??? You're right, I agree.. It really means what an individual thinks it does, which proves we're all different and thank gawd not the same as you.

I had sex at age 9 it was a ton O fun but I wasn't looking for emotional support from any one but my mom..
.physical reality rocks...

[Sapphrodite]

I have thought about this a lot, and it's fair to say that there are distinct differences between when one discovers they are bisexual, rediscovering one's sexuality from a bi perspective, and one's first bi experience.

The first time I realized I was bi, I was doing something completely platonic but it triggered something sensual in my head - but I wouldnt consider that a bi experience. For months, I reached out trying to find acceptance among other like-minded women, adding bisexuality into my fantasy and porn interests, and talked about both my/his emotions with my partner.

But I'd say my first bi experience was after finding a mental, emotional and physical attraction to someone, it would be that first kiss... bringing the longing and attraction to fruition. Nothing beats a first kiss *sighs*

It's like asking when a relationship starts: sometimes it's something very definitive and sometimes it sneaks up on you and you dont know until you're already in it. Either way, if you remain emotionally open, you should be able to follow the subtle changes in your awareness and thoughts as you become comfortable with your bi side - and imho, that is the true "bi experience"... :2cents:

[void()]

Way back in grammar school I developed a crush on a guy and gal. Both were my friends and both were amorous toward one another, me. We all remained together it seemed for ages. But it really wasn't ages. as life had it, we drifted apart. The kids in our classes then weren't bothered I had a boyfriend and girlfriend, nor that the guy and gal had both themselves.

The adults, didn't bother 'correcting' us. Their line of reasoning was 'kids being kids', although they did ensure it never went further than puppy love kisses. Of course at that age even that was erotic. But in all no one seemed too concerned. And no one said 'this is taboo' or 'we don't do such things'.

Hindsight as perfect as it is, I'm left wondering no one did. Yet past is past, we'll move further along. Not sure I really count grammar school puppy love as a 'bisexual experience', though it was a prelude.

In a fast food place, there was a back door leading to concrete pad. It was used as a smoke break area. we'd get out the kitchen a few moments, regain sanity. I worked with a guy who was the pinnacle of a pure country boy, redneck. His girlfriend, a startling brash young blond gal never had need of peroxide at all. She worked up front at the registers. "Chuck', her boyfriend and I kept the kitchen going.

We had it down to an artistry, beating a competitor's drive thru time by at least twenty seconds or more. Chuck and i wouldn't talk much, there wasn't a need. we knew what one another thought before the other thought it. I'd hand him tomatoes as he turned to go fetch them. he'd pass me a part to wash just I reached for it. It was hand in glove the way he and I worked.

'Cindy', his girlfriend often asked, "you two mad at each other", if we'd spoken more than ten words. We'd shake our noggins and look dumbly at each other, shrug.

And Cindy could work in the kitchen just as well with me as Chuck. although she was a bit more loud at times. She was into a tad of drama, but it wasn't overbearing. She liked to see me get a twinge of 'oh no, got to move' in my eyes. She did the same to Chuck.

So it went for the three of us, until one day Cindy passes word she needs to see me out back. I wrap up and come to a break point, out back I go. she tells me it's Chuck's birthday, I should give him something he could really use, a blowjob.

Up until then I'd done my level best to remain a pro at the work, there was the work, that was all. She insisted, "we both know you like Chuck."

i looked at her dumbfounded. "We both?"

"Me and Chuck."

So it was arranged that Chuck would get a break and come out back. I did give him a blowjob, and Cindy returned out back with us. she watched, then joined in. after that, we took more smoke breaks where the cigarettes were not all that smoked. That lasted about a year and a half. All three of us became know to co-workers as the CBC trinity. It was different, enjoyed, loved in fact.

I'd call that a bisexual experience. But it wasn't a first. I'd had a guy, and a gal at different times prior to that. Those were bisexual experiences too. I never could really decide which I preferred, men or women so left it at deciding not to decide. Do know I'd really love a threesome sometime, but I don't see that happening.

My wife is straight, and though she lets me out to play, has no desire to join in. I respect that of her, as she respects the part of me that loves guys.

So, there's my bisexual experience, at least part of it. By the way, the names are fictional, but the memories are not. :)

[proseros]

What I have trouble getting is why 'bi-sexuality' is persistently related to an sexual 'act', or requires a sexual act to prove its existence.

Intimacy is within our capcity. Physical congress involving the reason and intellect as mechanic to its function is not something lower animals possess.

Nor appreciation of the effects of pleasure caused between us, nor the diverse ways and means at arriving at creating pleasure for its sake. No amount of modesty can offset our need to acknowledge the endless perpetual unities potentiated by creation of pleasure; the expansive assimilations of unities of men and women, keeping joyousness among them, so there may be affected the opportunity to share in the communion of loving.

YOUR 'Bi sexuality' is something YOU have, NOT SOMETHING YOU DO. We have always retained and need only learn to use it. Everyone retains the capacity physically and emotionally to love and create pleasure for its sake.

But no amount of modesty can offset depraved submission to animistic libidinous impulses.They're necessary and they will never go away. It is our responsibility FIRST to learn how to acknowledge, then give and receive this capacity that is always at our disposal. Educate and understand that you know men and women are beautiful and alive and FULL of love and pleasure and joyousness!

It is not just a big cock I want. I want a man who is a friend and a brother and a lover and a husband to my wife and a father to my children and every bit as good as me for them, and her Saph, every bit as good as her for us.

But that's just something I happen to want.

No it is not just "we're all here and we're fucking." It IS-
"We're all here and we all love and care about each other-and we know it."

I personally do not care about GAY this or TRANSDENDER that anymore than who smells my farts in the wind. There are only two genders period, and we work things out from there. Anytime you need to apologize because you love someone you are in deep trouble [Paul Mooney's cousin and "Pete" the fly LOL!].

I think you are very beautiful. Thank you for being here.

That's pretty much all there is to it.