Discovering your bisexuality

[Reeve]

How did everyone "find out"? For me, in all honesty I didn't so much figure out that I'm bi as I figured out not everyone is :) Until I was about 14 and talked to some of my closest friends about it, I'd always assumed everyone was attracted to both men and women, and that people who are straight or gay just chose to ignore their attraction to one or the other. That's probably really weird, but that was what happened with me. How about everyone else?

[kitten]

Welcome to the site!
I realized it after a shared experience for my spouses benefit. Then, it all came to me that I had felt these things before just put them aside.
There are at least a couple of threads with this topic in the forum. I bet you can find tons of stories there for those that may not repost.

hugs and glad you are here!

[parkwings]

As a youth I recall noticing all the pretty girls in school, but when puberty hit and I started fantasizing/masterbating, it became evident that male thoughts worked much better, go figure?

Since then my relationships have been interesting, to say the least.

[Cesca]

Its not that I felt different from anyone. But I did always wonder why I was so interested in how girls looked and my wall was covered in posters of female film stars and pop stars.

At high school I really knew something was up when I began to get tongue tied every time my geography teacher came near me. I was about 14 then and my open mouthed inability to make sense made me begin to suspect I wasnt only interested in boys.

[shameless agitator]

I think I'd known since I was a kid, but got thrown by the false binary of gay/straight. I started to wonder if I was gay especially after my partner introduced me to ass play. Again though I was thrown by a false binary. This time it was butch/femme. I don't really fit iether one and they just felt like costumes, so I figured I must be straight after all. Much later I still had questions and my ex was trying to set me up with this guy she knew. On a stupid pretense he put my hand under his shirt and there was no denying I wanted him. Only one person had ever inspired that kind of lust in me before and we've been together off and on for 16 years. Even then I had to go back to wondering if I was gay before I was able to accept myself as bi. I had unfortunately bought into a lot of the stereotypes about us.

[Kiraya]

I knew from about 8 years old... but didn't know there was a name for it until my late teens.

[dickhand]

My male cousin and I started fooling around when we were around 12 y/o . When we started getting sexual with girls , it was just another avenue for release for me . My cousin and I have never really quit . We have both married and fathered children and so forth . We still get together every once in while . I have done a few other men over the years but he is by far the one I have been with the most . Labels didn't mean much until our adult years . We did know enough not to advertise the fact we were sucking and fucking each other when we were young .

[AdamKadmon43]

i figured out that I was bisexual when my wife caught me in bed with a guy.

Adam

[Howardmoon]

For me it was a slow process. I had fantasies about guys, and was really worried that this meant i was (shudder) gay. but the reason that bothered me was, ironically, i was worried what girls would think. To anyone else, it would have been obvious that i was bi, but it was really difficult to come to terms with. I had no knowledge of Kinsey scales or anything like that. you were either gay or straight. So it wasn't until my 20s that I decided that I was really bi.

Also, it was weird, but I had a thing for lesbian and bi women porn. (Yes, I know many straight men like that). But then I bought a (very trashy) magazine called Options, The Bi-Monthly. and it was likea lightbulb going on.

[naive]

My male cousin and I started fooling around when we were around 12 y/o . When we started getting sexual with girls , it was just another avenue for release for me . My cousin and I have never really quit . We have both married and fathered children and so forth . We still get together every once in while . I have done a few other men over the years but he is by far the one I have been with the most . Labels didn't mean much until our adult years . We did know enough not to advertise the fact we were sucking and fucking each other when we were young .

being new to the bi/gay world, i never even considered attraction to cousins before, partly i guess because i've never found any of my cousins (m/f) attractive). in no way am i judging, but there's obviously a perception in the straight world that incest is taboo, mainly because of the consanguinity. so does that simply fly out the window when it involves same sex coupling? or is there still something "not quite rite" about being attracted to extended family?

for my bisexual discovery, i only accepted my own same sex attraction when i joined this forum a few weeks ago even though i've been turned on by guys for as long as i can remember (back when i started masturbating). but back then, i only ever said "maybe i'm bi" and then shrugged it off as "just a phase" and never pursued it further.

[DiamondDog]

I wrote about this here: http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=3641

Hmmmm I knew when I was 12 or younger and I'd look at bikers, mechanics, rednecks, hairy butch blue collar men, and truckers and get REALLY sexually excited and I used to jack off thinking about my friend's trucker dad and his long beard!

I was "sexual" with guys as a kid it wans't like rape or molestation or anything like that and I was told it was normal and that lots of guys did that by my parents when I got caught masturbating with a friend and I was really young and being sexual with guys wasn't doing much other than like watching each other masturbate, "accidentally" grabbing someone's penis, getting fingered or doing that to someone, putting a plastic toy thermometer in someone's butt, or "accidentally" kissing, and peeing with someone.

All the guys I did that stuff with turned out to be hetero. I have looked back and thought about how if I'd known about oral sex how I would have given it to my one friend and I remember when I was in 5th grade how a friend and I would j/o together and at first I wasn't too sure about it since I was afraid we'd get caught (like I had before with another friend), and he said how if we didn't j/o together how he'd tell everyone at school that I masturbated and I remember thinking "Gee, well what do you think we're doing NOW together????". I also remember that had I been more open about it I would have rubbed my cock on his and I love doing this with men when I have sex with them as an adult!

At 12 I remember looking at porn pictures of naked hairy men kissing in an outdoor shower and this has become ingrained to my memory and I still find outdoor showers, bearded/hairy men kissing to be sexy, and I love to kiss men who are this way like me!

Also when I was 13 I was in a public bathroom at a mall and I saw a HOT guy with a snakeskin jacket, a hunting knife, and a rugged/handsome chiseled face and I watched him piss (not directly looking at his cock, I was just hearing him and watching his body) and it was the sexiest thing I'd EVER seen at the time! Even as an adult I can still get aroused to hearing/watching/smelling men and women piss.

I also remember being turned on by this girl I grew up in my neighborhood with and those types of men and some guys I went to school with that are my age. I think that was in jr highschool, I know it was before highschool and after elementary school.

I knew for sure at 16 with the label and all when I saw a HOT guy and thought about him blowing me and touching his red flattop and rubbing my cock all through his red goatee and stache!

I'd also jerk off thinking about fucking a hot feminine woman with a sexy bearish hairy math teacher I knew in highschool and thinking about blowing him and masturbating all over his hirsute body!

I guess most people realize it when they first have sex with someone of the same/opposite gender or with both at the same time but I've known about my sexuality for a long time and having sex with men and women as an adult just confirmed what I always knew.

[TaylorMade]

I knew from about 8 years old... but didn't know there was a name for it until my late teens.

That was me... I was about 14,15 when I figured out that situation defined me best. As simple as that.

*Taylor*

[kennan]

I jacked off with other little boys when we were kids, but we never knew that in terms of male sex......and we all quit doing it together as we neared high school.....and we all set about on that lifelone male habit of jacking off solo and secret....

I got my first piece of pussy at 16....and knew instantly that I loved it....and I loved girls for all the other usual reasons, too.

But when I was19....on campus....a guy I didn't know just outright propositioned me one night.....I wasn't really sure what he was even talking about......but he touched my crotch.....scared the hell out of me but I said yes anyway......and followed him to a restroom and into a stall where he took my dick out of my pants and sucked me........holymotherofshit......that was awesome......as awesome as every pussy I had penetrated.......he sucked me dry, said thanks, that was good, and got up and left.....

From that moment on, I knew without a doubt that I wanted more of that.....and I got it.......within a short time I was getting two and three blow jobs a day.........and somewhere along the line I did some "trade outs," figuring blow jobs were so good it was worth doing turn-about-is-fair-play.....and by doing those trade outs I learned that I really got turned on by bringing other men to their orgasms.......as much fun as bringing a woman to her climax.....

and thus at 19 began my lifelong devotion to both pussy and peters.

[midtnbi8669]

I discovered I was Bi when I was 15. A friend from school and I went hunting.....a very interesting hunting trip it was too...:bigrin:

But back then, I'd never heard the word "Bi", so I was somewhat confused until I guessed that I was simply attracted to both sexes....I believe I was correct in that assumption..LOL

[midwestseeker]

To me, it kind of happened in two stages.

1. when i was 14 or so, I was having the obligitory fantasies about two girls, and It perplexed me as to why I found such a concept arousing, so i simply closed my eyes and replaced the mental imagine of two girls with me and another boy i went to school with...and discovered I liked it.

All through my teens I continued to have occasional attractions to boys at school, and they occupied about 35 percent of my fantasies.

2. For a while post high school, these feelings subsided a bit, but right around my 21 birthday, i was in my doomroom, I looked up from my magazine to see my roomate at the mirror in nothing but a towell and realized right there that the attraction to men was still there.

From there i was too chicken to attend any kind of campus meeting (i really didnt know what i "was" since my primary attraction is to women) so I discovered numerious bi resources on the web and in books. That's about where im at now.

[KR2007]

All through out high school I always thought that woman are beautiful. Not after that did i have my first sexual encounter w/ my best friend. That was the first time that i realized that I liked girls ;). Did I admit to it NO!! But now 3 years later I know that i am bisexual and do enjoy both men and woman (preferably woman).

[phoenix11664]

I fooled around with a couple of my guy friends when we were 13. We wanted to know what oral felt like and we couldn't get girlfriends who would do it for us. For a long time I wrote it off as sexual curiosity. Occassionally, I would be masturbating and start to fantasize about going down on one of the guys. I would push the thought from my head and not dwell on it. But something about the taboo of it and the submissiveness of it appealed to me (not that I had those words to describe it--it took me years after realizing I'm bi to realize I'm submissive). But I couldn't deny the fantasy turned me on and occassionally I would let the thought continue until I came.

When I got to college, I made friends with a bisexual girl. One night we went to see the movie In & Out. Sitting in the theater, it just hit me. I couldn't deny it anymore. I was bi. I broke down crying on the way back to campus. I couldn't be bi; I was a Christian. I struggled all weekend with my faith, wrestling with God, finally emerging with the realization that a loving god wouldn't have made me this way only to judge me. A loving God would accept me.

That was when I came out to myself (about age 19). It would be a few more years before I would fall in love (unrequited) with another guy. That was when I knew I was bi, that it wasn't just a sexual fetish or kink, but that I was truly capable of LOVING another man romantically.

Thanks for the opportunity to share some of my history. It's good to remember my journey and how I got to where I am, how far I've come.

[jem_is_bi]

I have known I was bisexual since I knew about sex.
I did not experience sex with a male until I was 58. I should have done it sooner. But, I am not sure how much sooner. I have had the same male partner for the last 9 months, still as much fun as the first time.

JEM

[LoveLion]

The feelings had been there since I started to feel sexual or romantic feelings. For years I denied them, questioned myself, thought it was just a phase, etc. I was confused because I knew I like men, but at the same time I still had feelings for women. I kept trying to figure out if I was gay or straight, and the thought of bisexual never even crossed my mind. Then one evening a few years back I was sitting in my basement on my computer and all of a sudden for no apparent reason that I can figure out, I just simply and plainly realised I was Bi. It was the strangest thing. it just hit me like a wave. BAM! I knew, and the confusion was over. It was the best feeling I have ever felt and I felt so happy and relieved. I remember for days after all I wanted to think about was "I am bisexual" and ever time I did the wave of contentness hit me again. I still dont know to this day what it was that cause this epiphany.

[naive]

i know that i'm probably going off topic again but it kinda relates because its about "discovering sexuality". i remember when i was in primary school, i used to really like recess and hate going back to class. i used to play on the monkey bars a lot, and so when the bell rang, i didn't want the play-time to end and i got really anxious. so i did as many flips and swings on the bars as i could before being forced to go back to class. and i inadvertently rubbed against the bars. this made me feel funny :bigrin: and i think it was my first foray into masturbation. it was such an intense time because, back then, masturbation never lead to ejaculation. i think it also worked with jets in swimming pools too. haha

omg, i can't believe i just revealed this.

[triandtry]

you know i am so greatful for sites like these because it allows you to hear and talk to other people that has the same feelings and desires.I think alot of people are closet bi- or even gay but are to afraid to express it.We were taught by our peers that it is wrong to have these feelings and surpressed them not allowing us to be who we are.I am a Bi-sexual male for many years i could have never been able to say that.I think many a good marriages has been ended because they were having feelings of in-completeness and just would blame it on the partner they were with when more than likely they just wasnt getting the satisfaction that they desired.Luckily i was re-married just a few years ago after being with my wife now for 5 and we have a very understanding relationship.she had told me that she had a bi- experience and one night while making love yes love during foreplay she asked if i trusted her and of course i said yes, when she pulled out a dildo and said she always wanted to do this to a guy.so she did,and i loved it first time ever.....Wow a whole new world....then we graduated to a strap-on loved it...then she said while doing me this feels nothing like the real thing and that got me more excited as she went on telling me that she would love to watch me being done by another guy....so we did and i loved it and been wanting to do it again since...but unfortunaletly i havent been able to find anyone thats why my wife and i came here to hopefully find someone i can trust

[the mage]

Welllllllll............my first 2 orgasms given to me were good head to completion from other guys. that set the target a bit.....
then I copped my first feel from a female cousin.....
and got many willing upskirt glances from another cousin.
Lessee.. I'd just turned 11, I think...
Then at age 13 my sister in law age 19 and hot used to do stuff like change into her bikini while still in the room with me, torture sheer torture...LOL
I had no chance, I'm totally bent..hehe.