Tired of it..

[elian]

I'm just a little depressed because I saw an editorial in the paper from a very conservative old man who thinks the gay people at the recent pridefest "should be greatful" that "they tolerate those kind around here" - I hate that sort of thinking, very much so. The man has an old brain, and it's not likely to be changed by anything - but it just bothers me - especially because I don't have voice to respond publically - if I print my name in an editorial people will know.

I just want to be myself, I love people for WHO they are, not what they have between their legs - I hate feeling like a prisoner. What the hell is wrong with loving people for who they are?

I'm almost to the point now that I just can't deal with the false boastfulness of the "cock-loving" gay culture and the arrogant hatred of the "angry old straight white guys" - it breaks my heart - it's simple enough that a five year old could understand it, but nobody is five years old anymore...everybody has to pretend to be somebody that they aren't and make things "complicated".

Don't you all get tired of the posturing and playing around? Isn't it time to just live life?

Thanks for listening to my rant,
-E

[sammie19]

I wholeheartedly agree Elian. Where I live people do think we should be grateful for having the privilege of being allowed to live there and work there, and for getting their trade. It is time to live and be happy and allow people to be who they are more what they are. This is the 21st century and it really is time that the victorians among us judged us on our quality as human beings and whether or not we make a valuable contribution to society. Not on how we live, or who we make love to or live with.

[Skater Boy]

Come on, guys... look on the bright side... there are certain states in Africa where if you're homosexual, then apparently you "don't deserve any rights". And certain countries in the so-called "Developed World" where extreme homophobia is still very much "A Way Of Life" for the majority of people.

The truth is that whilst America and Britain are not 100% homo-friendly, we still have it a hell of a lot better than some people do.

I agree that the "the buggers are legal now... what more are they after?!" attitude is distressing. But whilst we're not being lynched or burned at the stake, we will overcome...

[the sacred night]

You could write in to your newspaper anonymously or use a pseudonym- they print letters to the editor in response to articles all the time.

[MaybeSayMaybe]

I say write that paper an anonymous letter and ask that old geezer in public just how many sexual minorities exist in the US military today. That should be good for a few laughs. And now for the correct answer: not double-counting the male-female dimension, at least two. And the management knows all about it....

[shameless agitator]

Well, I say call him on his bullshit publicly and for god's sake come out! The reason they get away with a lot of this shit is because they keep so many of us so afraid to say anything or let people know who we really are, that we seem very small and weak. The only way this kind of shit is ever going to stop is if we all quit hiding and stand up for our rights!

[the mage]

You defeat hatred by exposing it.

[elian]

Thanks everybody - there are a lot of good points in the responses. I've gotten over it for the most part. Went out and had a bit of fun and exercise today - that always helps to put things into perspective.

[ghytifrdnr]

OK, a different take. I think that by responding to that person in any way is just playing into their hands and giving them power. To even think on their message is giving them power. To ignore them is the most effective course of action.
:2cents: :2cents:

[dafydd]

Come on, guys... look on the bright side... there are certain states in Africa where if you're homosexual, then apparently you "don't deserve any rights". And certain countries in the so-called "Developed World" where extreme homophobia is still very much "A Way Of Life" for the majority of people.

The truth is that whilst America and Britain are not 100% homo-friendly, we still have it a hell of a lot better than some people do.

I agree that the "the buggers are legal now... what more are they after?!" attitude is distressing. But whilst we're not being lynched or burned at the stake, we will overcome...

I would say stand behind IDAHO (International Day Against Homophobia) May 17th, and their efforts for the international decriminalisation of homosexuality. LGBT people across the world are regularly imprisoned and put to death for their sexuality. I agree with the OP about how bigotted attitudes can get you down. That's why I do volunteer work for a LGBT charity that works within schools to educate and support LGBT rights. I feel it helps offset the feeling of helplessness I have whenever I read quotes like the one at the start of this thread.
Of course it is more difficult to fight if you are not out, although not impossible. I would encourage everyone to come out and be open. I know this is very difficult for some people in certain situations, but people can make a difference if they are seen as good role models by others.

D

[Skater Boy]

LGBT people across the world are regularly imprisoned and put to death for their sexuality. I agree with the OP about how bigotted attitudes can get you down.

Alas, whilst there are homosexuals, there will ALWAYS be some degree of homophobia, IMO. The important thing is to ensure that we have our human rights (right across the globe), and that we live decent lives. Personally, I am more concerned about regimes that persecute homosexuals, than the odd ignorant civilian who who has nothing better to do than express his bigoted views.

Both are morally reprehensible, but one can fairly easily be ignored.

[Skater Boy]

OK, a different take. I think that by responding to that person in any way is just playing into their hands and giving them power. To even think on their message is giving them power. To ignore them is the most effective course of action.
:2cents: :2cents:

Exactly. Arguments are sometimes best won by using ACTIONS rather than WORDS. By writing in with a "counter-attack" you become an unwitting participant in his "game". And sometimes the best way to win a game is not to even play it in the first place.

[12voltman59]

Elian--I would not be too depressed or upset at the comments made by the "tired old brain man"--the day for those of his like are numbered----

From what I see of the younger generations---those now in high school and college--they are far more accepting of those of nearly every non-straight sexual orientation---than those of us in the older genearations.

Not long ago at a little get together at the lake I spend time at--this friend of a neighbor was bitching about the fact that so many kids--gay and straight are members of a "faggot group" as she called it and that so many of the kids in the school are gay or at least experimenting with it--she of course--thought this sickening, perverted and disgusting (me thinketh she protesteth too much!!! LOL) She said that other than band --and Four-H--this group was the most popular extra-curicular group at that school.

This is at a high school located in a rural farming area of west central Ohio!!!!!--the "heartland of America!!!! populated with "working class" people--people not necessary known for acceptance of anything not right down the middle of the road ---I sure as heck can't say around here that I am deeply opposed to this debacle "war" our Commander in Chump has put us into----

Just imagine what things must be like at schools in more upscale and urban areas---

Perhaps---one day---if kids in a rural part of Ohio are so accepting of sexuality that is not "the way it should be"---- maybe we really are well on the road to having acceptance by the broader society and culture.

[Skater Boy]

LOL, well, maybe we should all "conspire" to make homosexuality and bisexuality "trendy" again... I wonder what it would take? I agree that certain parts of the "younger generation" are more accepting, but I still feel that homosexuality is not considered a positive thing by many. At least not where I live.

However, I DO have my human rights, so I'm not gonna go starting any riots just yet...

[dafydd]

LOL, well, maybe we should all "conspire" to make homosexuality and bisexuality "trendy" again... I wonder what it would take? I agree that certain parts of the "younger generation" are more accepting, but I still feel that homosexuality is not considered a positive thing by many. At least not where I live.


But SB you live in London?! You can't get a much more progressive city. Well apart from Berlin and San Francisco.

d

[IanBorthwick]

You defeat hatred by exposing it.

On the contrary, it's already exposed there. People don't see it as wrong and that's the problem. The only way to drive out hate is with love and information...you have to say something when you can and understand they fear what they cannot comprehend.

[Skater Boy]

But SB you live in London?! You can't get a much more progressive city. Well apart from Berlin and San Francisco.

d

Yeah, London does have its homo-friendly side. But most of the youngsters round here are yobs, and some of the adults aren't much better. Having been to several educational institutions and had a few jobs, I'd say that homosexuality is still very much a minority culture that is frowned upon by the majority.

At ALL of the educational institutions I went to, homosexuals were something to mock and laugh at. perhaps even victimize. And there was the occasional adult who might even discreetly indulge their prejudice.

Is homosexuality trendy atm? No. Not by any means. It is "tolerated", but thats all.

Being rich, having a flash car and a pretty girl on each arm, being involved with drugs, and being recognisably famous are top of the aspiration list these days. And a homophobic attitude is often an inseperable part of the cultural parcel.

At least if you ask most teenagers in London. One hopes that people grow out these things, but you might be surprised just how many of them retain their teenage values through to mid and later life.

I didn't mean that we should try and make homosexuality "socially acceptable", because to some extent, it already is "accepted". I meant that we should try and attach POSITIVE connotations to being homosexual, as opposed to the current negative stigma that some see.

But like I said, as long as I'm not being lynched in the streets, I'll be content even if I don't start a social revolution.

Mind you, did you hear the news report about the Gay barman who was beaten to death in London a year or so ago... His homosexuality being the only motive of the otherwise un-known to him attackers?:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/england/london/5087286.stm

Its a far from ideal world. But "I will survive".

[shameless agitator]

Ian & 12volt both raise good points. Some of you may remember, up until recently my signature was a quotation from Dr. King. "Hate can not drive out hate, only love can do that". As far as 12volt's point about the kids being more accepting, you're dead on and really the only way society has ever made true progress in it's attitudes is through children being more progressive than their parents & the parents evetually dying off. Sounds mutually exclusive? why call the bigots on it if the problem will be self correcting when the new generation rises to power? Because the younger generation will be more progressive only if we don't let the bigots monopolize the debate. They have to see that queers aren't all freaks and that we just want what everybody wants.

[elian]

YThe peculiar thing about this is that he was complaining about gays showing "pride" - The whole reason for pridefest in my opinion is because of people like this gentleman who have been telling gays that they are less than human for at least 75 years.

I have seriously been thinking about a response, but I've had a tough day today - need to think over my response.

[elian]

Sent this AM to editorial desk -:

There has been a lot of commentary in this editorial section over the past week and a half over the issue of the "Pridefest". I do not believe that a person living in this commonwealth would risk their life, livelihood, family, reputation and personal property just to “choose” to be gay. In an ideal world, there would be no need for such an event. People would be judged by the merit of their actions and the content of their character rather than the color of their skin, their political affiliation or who they choose to love. The fact is there are homosexual people of great integrity, such as the homosexual men and women who serve in our Armed Forces. They do their job silently, with honor, denying a part of who they are personally because they believe that service to their country is a greater sacrifice worth making.

I apologize if this response makes some of you uncomfortable, but I am very tired of living in a society filled with hated, bigotry and fear. If you want to see what the real face of your community looks like then turn off the “reality” shows on your television sets and take a closer look at your neighbors, coworkers and friends.

[Skater Boy]

Well, lets hope your words of wisdom don't fall on deaf ears. Even if the bigoted old man doesn't listen, maybe you'll win over someone else.

If not, we can all get together and sit on the lawn outside The White House, holding hands and singing "Lesbian Seagull" until they start taking us seriously.