Boys Don't Cry

[summer_love0628]

Has anyone seen the movie Boys Don't Cry (I just watched it on Lifetime) I just wanna kno WHY ARE PEOPLE SO DAMN CLOSED MINDED?!

oh and if u don't kno...Boys Don't Cry is a movie about Brandon Teena (aka Teena Brandon). Here's the summary: "When 20-year-old Brandon arrived in rural Falls City, Nebraska, in 1993, his handsome looks and boyish charm won him several friends in town and even a pretty young girlfriend. But only three weeks later Brandon was brutally raped and beaten by two of his friends, who became enraged when they discovered that he was actually a woman. A week later the same two men murdered Brandon, along with a young mother and another man with whom he had sought refuge miles away. The Brandon Teena Story is a powerful documentary about hatred and homophobia. In focusing on the last few weeks of Brandon's life, it tells the tale of Brandon's coming of age struggle with identity and how his gender ambiguity induced feelings of betrayal, confusion, and hostility among the residents of an isolated American township."

I'm just SOOOOOO sick of people . Hatred is such an ugly ugly thing. I just dont understand y people have to make it their business who people love. it just bothers the crap out of me. I mean yeah sure the "default" or the "norm" is heterosexuality but that doesnt mean that anyone who isnt deserves to be treated differently, cruel, or any other possible thing that you can think of.

I'm lookin at this picture of my girl and thinkin about how happy she makes me, how amazing she is, how she makes me feel...how i make her feel...etc. etc. its just sooooooooo damn frustrating knowing that there are people out there who would despise us if we were seen together. people who couldnt see past our gender to the love that we have for each other. naslnfkaslnfiownafknalkfnaisofnksaln UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH. is it really that much of a big deal that the person that i love has a vagina. i mean honestly...wait how did i even get to talkin about me. i guess i've just been freakin out a lot lately....and watchin that movie didnt help...although it wuz a good movie...yet a horrible thing to happen to a person.

yeah ok im gunna shut up now.
<3

[Skater Boy]

Yup, I've seen it. I have to admit, the scenes at the end are pretty strong... its one of those films that DOESN'T have a happy ending. And that kinda p*ssed me off because for a Hollywood film its almost like implying that this is the sort of thing that one can expect in life... "And the moral of the story is: if you act like a guy when you're really a girl, be prapared to get gang-raped and murdered by rednecks, folks". But I guess its just representative of the fact that some people still have these attitudes, and if anything, one should learn "to be cautious" in life as a result of watching this film.

That said, its only a movie and not necessarily an accurate reflection of reality.

Hilary Swank did some good acting though... didn't she get an Oscar for this one? Pah... they love that crap... Brokeback Mountain, that Tom Hanks movie... anything with famous straight actors that deals with homosexuality, and its like "pat on the back"... almost like "Gayxploitaion" or something...

[Skater Boy]

almost like "Gayxploitaion" or something...

Except without any gays.

[MarieDelta]

Heh. Had to comment here.

I've seen the movie, it was well done. It is based on Brandon Teena's real life experience. This is what happened.

It's like the Gwen Araujo Story, and countless others.

Yes people face transphobia, it is real and it is out there. Should we let it rule our lives? Absolutely not.

In *most* cases trans folk are safe, there are some cases where we should either be extremely careful or just not go.

There is a day in November dedicated to thos who have lost their lives due to transphobia

[Skater Boy]

I've seen the movie, it was well done. It is based on Brandon Teena's real life experience. This is what happened.
It's like the Gwen Araujo Story, and countless others.



In that case, the sad ending is probably justified. Better to show what really happened than to brush it all under the carpet with a happy ending. Still sad though... I think its even sadder now that I know its based on real events. At least before I could dissmiss it as a work of fiction...

[summer_love0628]

In that case, the sad ending is probably justified. Better to show what really happened than to brush it all under the carpet with a happy ending. Still sad though... I think its even sadder now that I know its based on real events. At least before I could dissmiss it as a work of fiction...


true. i watched the story about Gwen too...although i must admit happy endings are always nyce buut then again happy endings are for movies and stories like Brandon Teena's and Gwen aren't just movies. I always kno before I watch that a movie is based on real life events but after its over and i see those updates of who was sentenced to wut...blah blah blah....etc. etc. it all just hits me. It's unbelievable. And another thing can somebody tell me wut sense it makes for tha "big bad guys" to rape Brandon Teena. As much as they talk about him being the f word..and how much they hate him and everything why rape?! maybe its the whole power thing that it usually is....i dunno....

[Skater Boy]

And another thing can somebody tell me wut sense it makes for tha "big bad guys" to rape Brandon Teena. As much as they talk about him being the f word..and how much they hate him and everything why rape?! maybe its the whole power thing that it usually is....i dunno....

That sounds like a job for a REAL psychologist. Although I'd guess its part of the same primitive attitude that causes most men to "hate" homosexuals. I think by "raping" her, they proove in some way (if only to themselves) that a woman is only meant to have sex with men, and remind her that in reality (at least in terms of outward physical appearance) she is a woman, and not a man. This latter point is something that Brandon Teena was very careful about admitting- even to herself, and by the act of FORCING Brandon Teena into a heterosexual female role they both reaffirm their own beliefs on sexuality and give Brandon a harsh reality check.

but thats just my theory... :2cents:

[Skater Boy]

Love the picture of you and your girlfriend, btw! You do look quite similar to the couple in the movie. hope things work out for you regarding the parental control situation...

[summer_love0628]

hmmmm....interesting take on it. I guess i could see that...well not see it buut understand it well ok no.....damnit lol ok u kno wut im tryin to say. hopefully.

annnd thats not me and my girlfriend thats Brandon and his girlfriend....i think its Lana or something like that. thanks tho...yeah im gunna need all tha good luck and such that i can get.

[Fire Lotus]

As much as they talk about him being the f word..and how much they hate him and everything why rape?! maybe its the whole power thing that it usually is....i dunno....

Rape is not about sex. It's a bout rage and comtrol/power. The raper feels powerless or not in control in other situations and takes it out on the victim.

[12voltman59]

After a number of years of life in general, and from having worked as a probation officer and did some graduate work in counseling--I am convinced that 95 percent of the crap people lash out at others for--has nothing at all to do with the other person--the real root of it lies within the person striking out who is trying to deal with his/her own issues--

It's that in our culture--we don't have many good models for people to follow---in many circles still--going to "see a shrink" is enough to make people steer clear of you, cause you just might really be the crazy freaking bastard they always thought you were!!!

I think that this is especially the case in terms of extremist homophobia---the hyper homophobic person is really lashing out at what they find so aborent in themselves

It is usually that one dominant person leads the pack in such instances, and the rest of the buddies just follow along---and of course--they themselves have their own internal "faggot" issues going on-and God knows--ya can't let anybody know that ya just might be one too--so ya go along--even to the point of "killing that Goddamned faggot motherfucker!!"

With a mob killing occurs--the mob or pack mentality takes over and the weak ones "follow the leader"

That is a whole other issue----

I had not seen the show that you speak of, but I had heard of that case when it got reported in the media---

[Skater Boy]

Internal conflicts may account for SOME cases. But IMO not EVERYONE who dislikes homosexuality is secretly homosexual. No matter how badly we try and use that as the justification.

The truth is that some people just have different VALUES. or they come from a CULTURE that promotes certain beliefs and attitudes.

I'm not saying its not ignorant, but thats just the way it is.

I think power does play an important role though... perhaps some perceive homosexuality as a threat to their own power, or the power of their social group.

[summer_love0628]

Rape is not about sex. It's a bout rage and comtrol/power. The raper feels powerless or not in control in other situations and takes it out on the victim.

yeah i kno thats wut i said...maybe its about the power.

[womandriver]

I too saw the movie yesterday on lifetime and was repelled.as well done as the movie was I am not real sure that "shedding the light on our problems" helps. We live in an extremely patriarchal society and unfortunately anything that people in general don't understand they tend to fear. I am not sure wether the issue is power or fear that if they can be fooled by someone who is "just a woman" then all of them could end up in bed with someone of the wrong gender but in any case just like racism and sexism it exists in our society. The only way to change that is to educate our children, and I dont mean as the religious right would have us do, but by truly educating them that alternative lifestyles do exist and are just like them, not by hiding our collective heads in the sand and trying to deny that a whole class of people exist. Oh well time to get off my soapbox now.