Transgendered and Intersexed Folks: Loves ya!

[mindfinding]

Hey there,

I wrote a thread title "Shemales in Canada", and began to ask questions to a part of society not typically recognized or known. I asked some very personal questions to a few folks and received some honest answers. Here is what I now understand.

1: The term "shemale" is the same to a intersexed person as is calling a respectable lady a "hooker". The term has been used by the porn industry to sell videos of various acts, non of which include the real life and day to day of an intersexed person. A great deal of the frustration attached to the term is that people who fall into that category are merely looked at as sex toys and not human. Thats a term that would piss me off and make me sick as well if I we're intersexed.

Shemale is also attached to the transgenered folks and for the same reasons I can see why it would be more of an anger than appropriate.

2. Growing up intersexed or transgendered would be one of the hardest things I could think to have to deal with. As pointed out in that "shemale" thread, a great number of folks who are a little different with reproductive organs, well, they have an enormous stress about ending their own lives, let alone can they have a normal one. Much to do with feeling like a freak, or not fitting in. Society has much to learn on these topics and I hope to see the day when we can help socially.

3. Being objectified sexually, what a kick in the bum. In my life I have been viewed as a vending machine, but not like this. Many folks in the IS and TG scene are viewed (like I said) as sex toys. When you have thoughts and education, talents and brain function, it would be very difficult to live like a robot to fit in with people. The impression I get is that some people feel like little less then concubines. Sad really.

There is much more, but let me level off by saying, I'm sorry if I have ever offended any intersexed or transgendered folks by being ignorant. I'm moving forward to not let that happen again and help make the world a little better place for ya.

I would also like to say thank you to all of you who helped bring info to me. Especially those who were willing enough to open up and help me "get it".

Cheers!

[mindfinding]

If people think you shouldn't use the word "Shemale" to describe them, then don't.

Pretty simple...... :2cents:

[izzfan]

I have to admit that my post in the 'shemales in canada' thread was critising the use of the term 'shemale' and I apologise if I came across as too PC [I:m pretty much a sworn enemy of political correctness lol] because, looking back you were simply naive about the term and didn't realise its connotations and your original post was actually about friendship and discussion rather than just about sex.

Yeah, I have to admit that there is still a hell of a lot of transphobia in the world [probably more so than biphobia in the world] and I mean, growing up as a bit of a TV/CD (I knew I was a TV since I was about 13) was hard enough at times so I dread to think what it must be like for transexual/intersexed people. I mean as well as not feeling comfortable with the sex they were born with and then there is the visual aspects of it - I mean if you are an 'out' transvestite/cross-dresser/pre-op transexual/ transitioning etc... then it is often quite obvious to the average person on the street and this probably leaves them a lot more open to comments, abuse etc.... than 'out' gay/bi/lesbian people who often just look fairly 'normal' and blend into society quite well. I mean, TG people have a lot of courage.

Then there is the sexual aspect and I have to admit that I am no saint in this respect and I have bought one or two pre-op TS porn magazines in the past out of curiousity. If TG people want to be models for those sort of magazines then I have no problem with that - I mean, as long as it consists entirely of consenting adults then what makes it different from any other type of porn [straight, gay, bi etc...] ? The problem I do have is when people are unable to tell fantasy from reality - I have to confess that I was a little guilty of that for a while [a few months ago] as I foolishly seemed to think that pre-op TS people were 'the best of both sexes' but from reading a lot of stuff about it and watching a couple of documentaries about it, it was clear that I was HEAVILY misguided!!! Education is the key here! I mean, there is a lot of gay rights activism, a lot of information about gay ppl/gay issues etc.... these days and it would be a great thing if there was the same level of information/activism for trans issues [and Bi issues as well].

Unfortunately, I have never met another trans person [I don;t know if CDing occasionally counts as 'trans' though] or had any trans friends and this is a real shame as they seem like pretty cool people. I mean, anyone who has the courage to be themselves in the face of widespread and intense transphobia/prejudice etc... has got to be an inspiring induvidual.

Izzfan :flag3:

[Long Duck Dong]

lol mindfinding...

i love trans people, intersex people and shemales.... they are 3 totally different aspects of the human race
I have some of the best trans and intersex friends in the world....but they see themselves as normal people, they don't want the labels of transperson or intersex and its the same with shemales....

if I am referring to trans people, I use the term trans people
if I am referring to intersex people, I use the term intersex
and if I am refering to people that fall into the class of shemale and see themselves as shemales, then.... yeah you guessed it... I will use the term shemale

btw, I am not bisexual, I am actually pansexual ( omnisexual ) and if you have to go look up the term... then you understand why I use a term that people can instantly relate to

I am a nice person, so pansexual ( omnisexual ) means simply that a trans person, shemale, intersex, natural born person, male or female..... is simply a person to me....there is no seperate levels of attraction for each group

I simply find everybody attractive
gays, lesbians, bisexuals, pansexuals, shemales, trans, intersex, heteros, TV/CD, drag queens, female impersonators, male impersonators, drag kings,
bearmen, bearwomen, BBW ( big beautiful women ), BHM ( big handsome men ) asexuals, autosexuals, eunuchs, kinky people, vanilla people yadda yadda yadda ... i think i will shut up now :tong: :tong: :tong:

[Keliana]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZ87kFONtos&eurl=http%3A%2F%2Fprofile%2Emyspace%2Ecom%2Findex% 2Ecfm%3Ffuseaction%3Duser%2Eviewprofile%26friendid %3D130798936

[mindfinding]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZ87kFONtos&eurl=http%3A%2F%2Fprofile%2Emyspace%2Ecom%2Findex% 2Ecfm%3Ffuseaction%3Duser%2Eviewprofile%26friendid %3D130798936

Wow. Eye opener. Incredible eye opener. Thanks for the link!

[the sacred night]

Yes, please share more links! I want to learn more about this too, I feel very ignorant. I don't have any trans friends (that I know of) so I can't ask them these things...

[Long Duck Dong]

its a very nice video........ the nz mayor, Georgina byer is a good friend of mine
and yes she is a trans person

in a tv interview just after she become mayor, she stopped the interviewer in mid speech and said " are we here to talk about my role as mayor, or your fetish for trans people "... the interviewer said " we are looking at the issues surrounding you as nz's first trans mayor " and Georgina replied " no, I am looking at my role as mayor, you are focusing on the fact that I am a trans person, which has nothing to do with my role as mayor "

the lesson there is simple and clear..... many of the people that are trans and well known or highly regarded, got highly regarded cos of their abilities to relate and interact with people.... their trans nature is a personal aspect of their life... but something that they don't make a big deal about.......

[Keliana]

http://abcnews.go.com/2020/story?id=3072518&page=1

[BreeIsMe]

Thank you Mind
Thank you Keliana
Thank you all

As is shown in Keliana's first link, transgendered individuals, for the most part, look pretty normal in their chosen gender role. They (we) are NOT freaks....
Being trransgendered is like going through puberty your whole life.. You just want to fit in (in your chosen gender) and you desire acceptance. This is despite many people trying to "out" you and making fun of you and even in severe cases killing you. Your family often abandons you as do friends, coworkers, etc.
I, for one, appreciate everyone's desire to understand.. that is the first step.

Bree

[DeafF2M]

As an FTM, I'm happy to hear that you feel more enlightened.... that's all we can hope for. There are a lot of us transpeople and intersexed people out there who ARE willing to answer questions, as long as they are asked respectfully and listened to with respect.

I've done a number of "Trans 101" workshops over the past 7 years and while I see a number of the same old questions over and over again, like, "So, do you have a dick now?"... occassionally, I'm astounded when I see someone asking me a totally intellectual life-affirming question. For example, there was one person who asked me if it was easier coming out as trans than it was to come out as gay? I used to be a dyke, so.. that question was an interesting one.

In MY experience (not everyone has the same experiences as I do)... I have found MORE acceptance over being trans than being gay. I'm still trying to figure out why that's true for me.

Anyway, Mindfinding... thank you for your comments; I guess that means Keliana, Bree, and myself, along with the other Trans and intersexed folks are doing something right.

OH, someone asked if CD counts as trans... You'll find in most definitions of transgender that cross-dressers DO count.