mtb0509
Apr 19, 2007, 11:39 PM
Well I'm new here and I don't have anyone else to talk to this about, so I'm utilizing the precious anonymity of the internet! yay! [this is gonna be a long one, so here's your warning]
I'm a male, 20 years old. I don't think I'm fully bisexual since I never ever want to have anal or oral sex with another man (makes me sick to my stomach just thinking about it), but seeing pictures or watching videos of two guys kissing gets me hard in an instant. I think it all came about when I moved to a college known for it's larger gay population and I started wondering what it'd be like to even kiss another man. Since then the thoughts have grown into me thinking about it a lot and wanting an encounter to happen.
So to the best friend part. He's a year younger than me and I've only known him for about 2 or 3 years, but I feel like there's a deep connection between us, and I haven't felt this way about anyone I've ever met. When I'm at school away from home, and apart from him, I can't stop thinking about him and I desperately want to be with him. I lie in bed at night thinking of him and I can't get him out of my head. When we're together, no matter what we're doing, I just feel like everything is right and I am extremely happy and that I should appreciate the time we have together, but it's still not enough for me.
I think he's one of those touchy-feely people. He likes to just put his arm on you or sit really close, just little things like that (at least he acts that way around me). And sometimes I've seen him just stare at me for no reason, but I like it; oh and then there will be times where he'll just want to wrestle around and I'll wind up on top holding him down and he'll just lie there looking me in the eyes with a smile on his face and he's not resisting at all. Sometimes I get the feeling that he feels the same way, and that he could also possibly be bi, but I'm not sure. He's had lots of sex with many girls (while I'm still a virgin).
Ugh, I really want to come out to him and tell him how I feel, but I just don't know. Even though we've both agreed we're best friends, we still don't talk to each other about any deep or emotional issues. I'm going home for the weekend and I'll hopefully get to hang out with him. Lately I've been fantasizing that we have a moment alone and I finally tell him how I feel and then he tells me he feels the exact same way and then we make out. I feel guilty for thinking that, but I really want it to happen.
I'm just so scared to tell him this because I'm afraid that I'm completely wrong about him and he'll just shun me and then I'll never see him again. What should I do?
I'm a male, 20 years old. I don't think I'm fully bisexual since I never ever want to have anal or oral sex with another man (makes me sick to my stomach just thinking about it), but seeing pictures or watching videos of two guys kissing gets me hard in an instant. I think it all came about when I moved to a college known for it's larger gay population and I started wondering what it'd be like to even kiss another man. Since then the thoughts have grown into me thinking about it a lot and wanting an encounter to happen.
So to the best friend part. He's a year younger than me and I've only known him for about 2 or 3 years, but I feel like there's a deep connection between us, and I haven't felt this way about anyone I've ever met. When I'm at school away from home, and apart from him, I can't stop thinking about him and I desperately want to be with him. I lie in bed at night thinking of him and I can't get him out of my head. When we're together, no matter what we're doing, I just feel like everything is right and I am extremely happy and that I should appreciate the time we have together, but it's still not enough for me.
I think he's one of those touchy-feely people. He likes to just put his arm on you or sit really close, just little things like that (at least he acts that way around me). And sometimes I've seen him just stare at me for no reason, but I like it; oh and then there will be times where he'll just want to wrestle around and I'll wind up on top holding him down and he'll just lie there looking me in the eyes with a smile on his face and he's not resisting at all. Sometimes I get the feeling that he feels the same way, and that he could also possibly be bi, but I'm not sure. He's had lots of sex with many girls (while I'm still a virgin).
Ugh, I really want to come out to him and tell him how I feel, but I just don't know. Even though we've both agreed we're best friends, we still don't talk to each other about any deep or emotional issues. I'm going home for the weekend and I'll hopefully get to hang out with him. Lately I've been fantasizing that we have a moment alone and I finally tell him how I feel and then he tells me he feels the exact same way and then we make out. I feel guilty for thinking that, but I really want it to happen.
I'm just so scared to tell him this because I'm afraid that I'm completely wrong about him and he'll just shun me and then I'll never see him again. What should I do?