Bi activists v's bi aggrevators v's bi average

[Long Duck Dong]

one thing that is easy to spot in any large group, is the 3 main classes of people and the bi community is no different

we have them as well

the main issue with 2 of the groups, is that they can cross the line between group support and recognization and start walk around pushing a personal agenda and claiming they are doing it for the average bi person

this is something I have seen so many times.....its not hard to spot.....

a activist is trying to put forward a message to the world of, * we want to be heard, seen and accepted *

a aggrevator is trying to push forward issues that they see as needing addressing.... issues that may or may not need addressing

a average is a person thats just trying to live.... they can range from the out to the closeted...they are not political minded and prefer just to live their lives without wanting to be thrust into the public eye

to understand this in simple terms, we are gonna use greenpeace, sea shepard and the average objector as a example, and use whaling as the cause

greenpeace is anti whaling, they spread their message and stand up to be seen thru conferences, marchs and protests

sea shepard is anti whaling, they are happy to ram ships and issue threads that they intend to cause damage and destruction, as part of their objection to whaling... if their eyes, its ok to place lives at risk but the whalers shouldn't be allowed to react

the average protestor ranges from handing out leaflets and adverts on tv, to the arm chair protestor who may swear at the whalers, and nothing else

so how does that work in with bisexuality ???

its simple.....

2 of the groups, want the bisexuals to stand up and be proud, be seen and accepted.... one group doesn't care about being seen and recognized
it is estimated that the most visible of any group, are the top 10% which are the activists and the agrevators....
what generally happens is that they start pushing a message, that becomes a personal agenda as most of the group doesn't get involved or support the movement, many cos it serves them no real purpose

as far as the bisexual community goes..... there is a push to have bisexuality made more visible and accepted, but like any issue... there is a thing called * pushing it too far * and thats when the rest of the world starts pushing back

now another aspect of any group, is the " for us or against us " mentality.... and thats what is starting in the bisexual community....
unlike the gay / les community, that has a clear and visible need to fight for rights, the bi community doesn't....and so gaining support is a largely differcult thing to do... hence most bisexuals don't see the need to make themselves visible to the general public.... and have the opinion of " why do the public need to know about my sex life *

the age old adage of * bi pride * is a dual edged sword.... a person can be pride of who they are and walk with their head held high..... or they can push it upon people and say * I'm bisexual... I'm proud... and I am in your face *

that is where things take a nasty turn..... and feelings against the average bi, start running high..... not just the activists and the aggrevators, but the bisexual community as a whole....

the same thing has happened with the gay community..... as a result the activists and aggrevators lost a great deal of respect, support and backup from the gay community, and the gay community suffered as a whole

I am simply curious as to how long its gonna take before the same happens to the Bi community and it starts to implode

[flexuality]

Do you mean when a group of people push so hard for their "rights" that they end up doing exactly what it is they're fighting against?

Sort of like the extreme end of the woman's equality thing....where they started out fighting against being put down by men.....and ended up putting men down. Exactly the thinking they were trying to fight in the first place, but kind of flipped over.

Kind of like saying "I am against hate and I hate you for hating me."

I see this happening where some people in the "bi community" seem not very accepting of the same people they want to be accepted by.

Or did I miss your point completely...? LOL! If I did, it's the saki....hehehe! :tong:

[ambi53mm]

LDD,

I can certainly see where this seems to be the case with almost any group working towards socio-political change and/or acceptance. The pendullum of change almost always swings to the extremes before it finally comes to rest in the middle...in writing your post are you refering to the bisexual community as a whole or this partcular bi community? "Bisexual.Com"...and as one ignorant of the former how reflective of the bi-community as a whole is an online community when compared with the bi-community off-line?

Ambi :)

[happyjoe68]

... the activists and the agrevators....
what generally happens is that they start pushing a message, that becomes a personal agenda as most of the group doesn't get involved or support the movement, many cos it serves them no real purpose

Perhaps that some of those who become activists and agrevators have a personal agenda to begin with that turns them into activists and agrevators - rather than vice versa. Perhaps by becoming "valiant for truth" they hope that they can rid themselves of, for example, their own internalised biphobia through removing it from the world and cleansing themselves in the process ... People like this can be dangerous since their goal is essentially unreachable

[Long Duck Dong]

lol... excuse me as I am half tanked, and I struggle to make sense to me at the best of times lol so if I don't make sense to you.... thats not surprising

ok, flex... mmm nope....its more like the activists are fighting for bi recognition and acceptance... and the the bi aggrevators continue that fight and demand the rights for bi marriage... bi marriage being the rights to marry a partner of the opposite and same sex.....
as bis, we have the rights to marriage, and the gays are fighting for same sex marriage.....that should settle most issues..... but if we applied something like bi marriage, then it crosses the line that some bi's hold as acceptable and becomes something that would damage the bisexual acceptance in the community and we start taking steps backwards...

I know what you mean about lesbians.... tho like you, I don't judge all lesbians the same...some are man haters, and they hold men responsible for their lives... once they across the point of * men are not to blame for their lives *.. they start to blame men for the lives of others..then we end up with all lesbians being judged by the actions of the man haters..... and thats totally unfiar, as I am good and dear friends with lesbians and more les than bi, ladies in the site and outside of the site..... it pains me to see them judged by the actions of a mere few very vocal man hating lesbians


lol ambi53mm.... as a rule a online community is a cross section of a community.... like about 1/20 of the total community....( as a rough estimate )
if the total offline community was 20 million people, then bisexual.com would equal about 1 million of them..

bisexual.com houses a vast and amazing cross section of the bi/ trans/ gay / les communities and I wouldn't have it any other way.... but as I have noticed.... most of the bi rights issues, center around the lack of bi bars, saunas and medical centers and specialists....

now the issue of bi bars and saunas, is not the issue of most of the community..... its only viable if people go.... and a business only becomes viable if people go....
it doesn't become the worlds fault if we chose not to or can't go to one.... its a personal choice.... but it becomes too easy to say that its cos of fear of discrimination or * outing * that people don't go......

the other issue is bi visiblity, the activists are about raising bi visibility in the community..... I am curious as to how that is gonna improve life for the bisexual ??
as a * out * bisexual.... being highly visible, has not changed a thing.....in fact its made matters worse for me, cos its the image of me that most people will judge other bi's by, cos I am out....its not something I wanted or asked for

hence the average bi, wants to hook up and enjoy intimiate experiences but they don't want to be visible in the public eye.....the activists want the bi people accepted by putting them in the public eye... and the aggrevators want rights that the bi's don't want or need....

in the cross section of bisexual.com we have the chance to express our wants and desires and judge from the response, a rough idea of what the AVERAGE BI wants to see in the way of bi rights and interaction in society.....

what I am seeing, and it may just be me.... is that the pressure is on, bot bi's to be more in the public eye... and that means that our private live becomes a area of public scrutiny...... if that happens.... I walk..... my private live is only open if i share it

[Long Duck Dong]

happy joe, I have to agree.....

I know of a couple of people that started off as * averages * that have become so extreme in their beliefs, that they have been beaten up and its only fueled their * fight against the machine *

honestly, walking into a pub and expecting to carry out the way they did, was asking for trouble.... its a known gay haters bar....and thinking that the NZ civil union bill ( the right to join in a union akin to marriage, for les / gay and hetero people that don't want a marriage under the christian system ), also gave them the right to kiss and hug in a bar, was simply stupid....
but now they are trying to rally support for a law to be passed that sets out seperate punishments for bi/ gay/ les bashers..... surprise, surprise, they are not getting support expect for the gay extremists

I have dished out a few beatings in my life and taken a few..... 85% of the time, its been self defence... people angry at the attitudes of the gay / les / bi extremists, decide that me and my bi/ les/ ga/. trans friends, need dealing to... what pisses me off about that, is the extremists think its homophobia.... its not.... its remarks made by the extremists, that the average hetero is reacting to, and taking it out on the nearest target, the average bi/ gay / les trans.....

[mindfinding]

Long Duck Dong,

You hammered that freakin nail right on the head. A great deal of resentment has boiled into other "causes" because they need to shove it in your face. I really don't care for that.

In the event I need some overly obnoxious people to drill folks for me and force my beliefs onto them......wait,....that won't happen. I'm comfortable with myself.

Good post LDD. Well addressed.