NEED SOME ADVICE

[lilbitsva]

:( With my first one she showed me things that I had no idea that i would ever come into. When I was growing up if you where bi/lez/gay then you where the bad people and no one wanted nothing to do with you. Then i meet this girl at work who was really pretty. I never thought nothing with the whole looking at girls and saying whether they where pretty or not. Because my friends and I always did it when i was in school. So one day we got to talking and everything. I never would have thought that i woudl really like this girl enought that I would want to kiss her or do other things with her. I had never kissed a girl before. I didnt' know if you did it like you did with a boy. I know that that sounds reall stupid but really i didnt' care. I really like this girl so i told her that. Then i tell her that i think that i may be bisexual. She told me okay. I told her that i was in love with my hubby and that i loved them both very much but i wouldn't leave my hubby. I told her that i knew that she needed more then what i could give her. so she found a girl that i knew would do nothing for her. That girl is nothing she is a lairer and now has it to where the girl that i liked wont' even talk to me. I Just want to go by her house and just kiss her because i miss her so much. I really do. I miss her with allmy heart but i'm afaird that the girls is going to be there and is going to do something to me. Me and this girl has had it out before because of the girl that i like. So now i have talked to all my friends and they tell me that one of these days the girl is going to do her wrong and she will see i had nothign but the best interest in my heart for her. wHAT DO YOU THINK THAT I SHOULD DO ABOUT THIS? LIL BIT

[rayosytruenos]

[...] i meet this girl at work who was really pretty. [...] I really like this girl so i told her that. Then i tell her that i think that i may be bisexual. She told me okay. I told her that i was in love with my hubby and that i loved them both very much but i wouldn't leave my hubby. I told her that i knew that she needed more then what i could give her. so she found a girl that i knew would do nothing for her. [...] wHAT DO YOU THINK THAT I SHOULD DO ABOUT THIS? LIL BIT Hi!

It seems that the bunch has delayed a bit in giving you an answer, so I decided to give you some advice till some cleverer people give theirs, so bear with me... :)

It seems that the girl has just followed your thoughts. You have your hubby and said to her that she needed more than what you could give to her, so she just looked for that, somewhere else. She might not have chosen the right person when looking for, but it's her decision. We should respect other people's decisions even if they are going to hurt them. We are all learning all the time, making mistakes and learning from them.

If she looked for another person, I would think that you were unable to give her what she wanted, so if you cannot, maybe it's better to let it go. In a relationship like the one you explained, while yourself have both your hubby and her, I guess she felt it was like a part-time relationship with her and not what she really wished.

If you cannot give what she wants, I think it would be better to let it go, at least you have still your hubby.

All the best,

ray

[Solomon]

i have a question, have you talked this over with your hubby? what does he say?

i would hafta agree with rayosytruenos in saying that we don't get to chose other people's partners for'em... no matter how much we wanna sometimes lol.

[catlickerk]

ok i see where you guys are comming from. 1. i agree have you talked to your husband about this? you never know what might come of it ;) .and you said that you two work together ,since this have talked to her and told her how you feel. that you cant stop thinking about her since that day? i was also in a situation where i was feeling that way with a girl but we were fwb(friends with benefits)and i told her how i felt it was somewhat mutual but she told me she was moving out of state and that she was sorry. theres alot more to it ,but that is the juest of it .

destiny

[lilbitsva]

I wanted to thank everyone for there advice. Yes i have discussed this with my hubby he said that he didnt' care that if i dated her or was into a relationship with that we could figure out a way to have it. He was very supportive. I just didn't know or i was scare of what might happen. I KNow that i really loved this girl and i still carry her in my heart. She was one of my loves that will stay with me until i die. I miss her so much. Hubby told me to go over there one day and just talk to her about it. Tell the other girl that you just want to talk to her and see if we can just be friends because he knows that it is just breaking my heart with out her. she use to work with me she doesn't anymore because her girl didnt' want her working with me so she made her get another job. i am very respectful of other people i wouldnt' try to sleep with her if she had a another girl. And the other girl knew that i really just dont' think that she cared about that. Everyday i think about her and what she is doing i miss her so much. i even seen her a few times at walmart and just didnt' go up to her because i was scared too. It has been a while sents we have last talked. I'm thinking six months. I just want her to be safe. This girl isn't wright for her and she knows it. I just don't want this girl to hurt her. Because i know that she has done things that wasn't right. And i told her to keep her hands off of her like that because if i found out that she was going to be sorry for it. I miss her so dearly. lil bit