A different kind of orientation

[Gracy]

Ok, so the labels asexual, heterosexual, homosexual, and bisexual, all refer to which sex(es) you are attracted to. The term pansexual brings gender into the picture. It means that you are attracted to all people regardless of gender or sex. Now, I would like to know of a term that is more specific when it comes to gender. I'd say that I'm attracted to people who have and androgynous gender. I have tried google-ing it, but I just don't know what to type in, in order to find what I'm looking for. Can any of you help me out?

[billy_campbell]

Genderless - The state of having no gender identity, regardless of physical sex. Not nessacerily the same as an androgyne, but they both appear androgynous. Genderless people may or may not pursue hormone replacement therapy and/or surgery. They usually want people to refer to them with gender neutral pronouns, instead of he or she.

What is a Genderless Mind? - http://serendip.brynmawr.edu/sci_cult/evolit/s05/web3/lpaterek.html

[flexuality]

Okay....I'm getting really confused! :confused: LOL!

Is there a difference between the "gender" and the "sex" of a person? I always thought they were the same thing.

I just looked up those two words and came up with this:

Gender - The properties that distinguish organisms on the basis of their reproductive roles.

Sex - The properties that distinguish organisms on the basis of their reproductive roles. Either of the two categories (male or female) into which most organisms are divided.

And since I am already I'm feeling confused....lol....I don't understand the difference between "sexual orientation" and "sexual preference" and "sexual identity"...I do sort of understand that orientation is kinda "who I am", preference would be "what I like" and identity I guess is "what I would call myself"....but it seems so much easier to just call all of it "Me."

I guess I just view me as a human being attracted to other human beings for a variety of reasons and that sexual interaction may or my not be part of that.

But I would like to have those terms clarified if someone would be willing to do that, so that at least I can understand better what people mean when they use them. :)

I have a tendency to use those terms interchangably and I'm seeing where it could lead to confusing conversations! :eek:

[dancechic17]

To answer Flexuality's question:

Yes, there is a big difference between gender and sex. Sex is biological. Gender is socially constructed. Sex refers to the biological sex organs a person is born with. Gender has to do with masculine or feminine characteristics that a person possesses. An example of this is a transgendered person. A person could be male sexually speaking (possessing male sex organs) but identify as being a female in gender. In other words, they are a female trapped in a males body.

Hope the helps clear some things up for you!

[Long Duck Dong]

sexual orientation: the label under which you stand... mainly covers the LGB or heterosexual umbrella.. IE: M/M, M/F. F/F

sexual perference, the sex of the partner and the type of sex are covered under this.... you may perfer to be with gay / straight / bi males and / or females or trans natured people

sexual Identity... I Identify as ..... you can Identify as anything under the sexual spectrum, the biggest issue is that others may not accept your sexual identity and may wish to apply one to you

[flexuality]

Will there be a test? :tong:

Seriously tho...thanks for the definitions. :)

[ghytifrdnr]

I think those are some pretty tortured definitions. It feels as though folks are trying to make distinctions where there may not be any. :(

[flexuality]

I think those are some pretty tortured definitions. It feels as though folks are trying to make distinctions where there may not be any. :(
I tend to agree with you.....but for conversation purposes and posting, I figured it was better to understand what people meant by those terms even if I don't always see the point of them.

Having said that, I just did some reading in regards to those terms and found it very educational....not so much in terms of "slotting" people, but rather in terms of understanding what myself and others may be going through, and that maybe I should not be so quick to think that my perspective is the same as their perspective when using those terms.

Here's some info if anyone's interested. :)
These are from Transgender sites, but I found them to very informative for all...(umm...lol! which word do I use?? LOL!) ...orientations? Idendities?

http://www.gendertalk.com/info/tgism.shtml

http://sagatucson.org/saga/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=42&Itemid=94

[Omnivore]

I tend to agree with you.....but for conversation purposes and posting, I figured it was better to understand what people meant by those terms even if I don't always see the point of them.

Having said that, I just did some reading in regards to those terms and found it very educational....not so much in terms of "slotting" people, but rather in terms of understanding what myself and others may be going through, and that maybe I should not be so quick to think that my perspective is the same as their perspective when using those terms.

Here's some info if anyone's interested. :)
These are from Transgender sites, but I found them to very informative for all...(umm...lol! which word do I use?? LOL!) ...orientations? Idendities?

http://www.gendertalk.com/info/tgism.shtml

http://sagatucson.org/saga/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=42&Itemid=94

Thanks for the links, some interesting reading.

Never heard of a Drag King before, but makes sense, just not thought of it before.

[BlueMoon203]

I think those are some pretty tortured definitions. It feels as though folks are trying to make distinctions where there may not be any. :(

I have recently been having this conversation with my brother. I have always belived in gender as being socially constructed as well, and I still do. I wonder sometimes if it is worth trying to explain it though.

[Gracy]

Hm... if people on this site are having enough trouble with the terms I'm using, I suspect they won't have the term I'm looking for...

[biwords]

Or you could just say, "I tend to be attracted to androgynous people", and leave it at that.

[softfruit]

I have recently been having this conversation with my brother. I have always belived in gender as being socially constructed as well, and I still do. I wonder sometimes if it is worth trying to explain it though.

I think drawing trans into it at the start is unnecessarily confusing for people - take gender to the much simpler level of "pink is for girls, blue is for boys". Now that's obviously a social construct rather than something biological, so much so that (so I've read) 150 years ago it was the other way round! Similarly gendered behaviour patterns of being tough or being nurturing are increasingly a matter of personal temprament rather than something that is automatically a mans or womans role (I'll grant you that excludes breastfeeding where alas some of us just don't have the tools for the job!)

[skiflydive]

I've considered myself heterosexual and/or bisexual at different times in my life. Now if anyone asked I think I'd tell them (if I told them at all) I'm pansexual. I don't much care about the genitalia of the person it's the person I care about.

[Danielle B]

I think those are some pretty tortured definitions. It feels as though folks are trying to make distinctions where there may not be any. :(

No, the distinctions are there.

Sex is whether you have male or female genitals (or both or neither).

Gender is what you are between your ears- your sense of being masculine, feminine, or somewhere in between.

[rockstarvomit]

If anyone is really really interested in this topic I just read a great book on it, Gender Outlaw: On Men, Women, and the Rest of Us by Kate Bornstein. It deals more with gender than with sexuality but with the two topics being so closely related it's hard to have one without the other!

Flex, as far as your questions it might be helpful to use the words gender and sexuality rather than gender and sex. Gender would be like male, female, trans, none of the above, androgynous, etc. Sexuality deals with straight, gay, lesbian, bi, and all of the colors in that rainbow ;)

Gracy - I understand what you mean about being a sexual minority within a sexual minority. I have a preference for gay men (which tends to be a problem :tongue: ) and I know that while it would probably be more comfortable to have a specific word for yourself, I think it's important to remember that words are only what we make them. Feel free to take a word that already exists and own it in your own way. Or feel free not to take a word at all. You really don't have to define yourself. You're attracted to the people you're attracted to; that's between you and them. Good luck, dear.

<3 mo