View Full Version : New to the lifestyle....[women reply]
candigirl
Mar 24, 2007, 12:01 AM
Ok well i've known i was bisexual ever since the seventh grade. It's just one of those things that you have at the bad of your head. Well i've been putting off woman for a very long time. i'm 19 years old and about to turn 20. I want to be with a lady now! I mean like in person not over the net. I'm just very shy when it comes to aking a woman out. HOW SHOULD I GO ABOUT IT LADIES? [object Object] :female:
deletetacount123
Mar 24, 2007, 12:09 AM
Candi,
Im very shy too!!! To me, the person has to be FIRST lol But you have to realize you can't expect people to always be first.... what if they are very shy too and are hoping YOU make the first move??
I have yet dated a girl but I do know if you like someone, try being thier friend first and see where it goes from there. Its MUCH easier to go up to a girl seeking friendship rather than going up to one seeking for a date.
I too would love to meet a real woman.. in real life not online lol (unless we meet in person of course)
One sign is if you see a girl keeps looking at you, smiles whenever you bust her for "staring" (when you look back and see her looking) smile too.
If you notice a girl you like, just try being friends first... the best relationships ALWAYS start as friendships :-)
Hope that helps some :) :)
Tasha
candigirl
Mar 24, 2007, 12:14 AM
Candi,
Im very shy too!!! To me, the person has to be FIRST lol But you have to realize you can't expect people to always be first.... what if they are very shy too and are hoping YOU make the first move??
I have yet dated a girl but I do know if you like someone, try being thier friend first and see where it goes from there. Its MUCH easier to go up to a girl seeking friendship rather than going up to one seeking for a date.
I too would love to meet a real woman.. in real life not online lol (unless we meet in person of course)
One sign is if you see a girl keeps looking at you, smiles whenever you bust her for "staring" (when you look back and see her looking) smile too.
If you notice a girl you like, just try being friends first... the best relationships ALWAYS start as friendships :-)
Hope that helps some :) :)
Tasha
Yea i thought of that as well, but if she says no. Then i've wasted great time talking to her when i culd of went up to her and said "hi i'm [so and so] would you like to meet up for lunch one day?" Yeah some women can be terrible at rejecting someone. they have to speak out of their butts. yet im yearning for a lady's touch! it hurts so much! [object Object] :female:
IDStewart
Mar 24, 2007, 7:45 AM
Yea i thought of that as well, but if she says no. Then i've wasted great time talking to her when i culd of went up to her and said "hi i'm [so and so] would you like to meet up for lunch one day?" Yeah some women can be terrible at rejecting someone. they have to speak out of their butts. yet im yearning for a lady's touch! it hurts so much! [object Object] :female:
If you make a new friend, have you really wasted your time?
Chicago is a very gay-friendly city. Have you checked out the local gay scene ('http://zoom.gay.com/selectLocation.do?cityId=22706')? In addition to the bars and nightclubs, there are other areas where lesbians and bi women are known to congregate (softball leagues, WNBA games, etc). Might not hurt to check with your local LGBT community center (that 'B' is in there for a reason, ya know! ;))
Herbwoman39
Mar 24, 2007, 9:20 AM
Candi;
It takes time to build a relationship. Lots of women don't want to just jump into the sack.
On the other hand, there are many who are. It's just a matter of time, unfortunately.
I'm also going to play the old fart card and say you're still a youngun. You've got plenty of time to build great relationships.
candigirl
Mar 24, 2007, 12:23 PM
Candi;
It takes time to build a relationship. Lots of women don't want to just jump into the sack.
On the other hand, there are many who are. It's just a matter of time, unfortunately.
I'm also going to play the old fart card and say you're still a youngun. You've got plenty of time to build great relationships.
Who said i just wanted to fuck a woman? I said i dont wanna waste my time on a friendship if she's not into women. So why be friends first when i can tell her im attracted to her and would like to go out on a date. Like normal people. I'm not a ho, i know how to date well. Its just that women can be a little hasty. waiting to get to know someone before i have sex with them is what i do. :flag1:
candigirl
Mar 24, 2007, 12:28 PM
If you make a new friend, have you really wasted your time?
Chicago is a very gay-friendly city. Have you checked out the local gay scene ('http://zoom.gay.com/selectLocation.do?cityId=22706')? In addition to the bars and nightclubs, there are other areas where lesbians and bi women are known to congregate (softball leagues, WNBA games, etc). Might not hurt to check with your local LGBT community center (that 'B' is in there for a reason, ya know! ;))
I know what the B stands for....can't be BISEXUAL without knowing.
with sports I notice alot of women whom do play sports are butched. I like femme women. You know that girly touch. I don't know much about the gay scene as of yet! That's why i'm trying to find out shit before my 21st b-day. I would love to go to a strip club, get tipsy and have a good time. I'm closeted if you all didnt know. I don't know about lesbian clubs...i would like to know more of the gay "urban" scene. :female:
Rhuth
Mar 24, 2007, 1:25 PM
Welcome, Candi!
Here is another how-to-meet-girls thread (http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?p=20001) you might be interested in. It includes a list of suggestions from Jen Sincero's (http://www.jensincero.com/) book, The Straight Girl's Guide to Sleeping With Chicks (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0743258533/jensincero-20/102-5222116-1674502). Although you are single, some of the information from a FAQ I wrote (http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1818) might be of assistance to you as well.
Remember when you were first trying to explore your sexuality with boys, and felt like everyone but you had a boyfriend? It took some time back then to figure out the protocol for going out with boys too. You would be amazed at how similar it feels while trying to figure out girls. Just like with boys, you can find tons of advice for how to go about it, until something you discover on your own just feels like you. Then, when it rains, it pours! ;) Until then we'll keep throwing out ideas for you until you find that something that is uniquely yours.
Best of luck!
/Rhuth
candigirl
Mar 24, 2007, 2:07 PM
Rhuth, you know what's also funny? The fact that bisexuals go through the same thing as straight women. Can't seem to beable to trust your g/f or b/f around your friends. My mother [whom doesnt know im bisexual] says that i should never trustmy friends around my boyfriend. Which i know there are however a few women sush as myself, who CAN in fact be trusted. Trust i feel is lacking in the world. Everyone is out for their own. :rolleyes:
shadowsaffinity
Mar 24, 2007, 5:22 PM
i was also very shy when i first started dating women and my 1st girlfriend helped me a lot as far as becoming less shy. i have met all of my girlfriends over craigslist, believe it or not. i never had a bad experience. i have met some wonderful people including 3 girlfriends and several other friends and dates. my trick is to talk to them a long time via email before meeting them, about a month or so. by that time, the crazies who are not serious will have given up.
good luck and enjoy yourself. it will be a wonderful experience and you'll be amazed how much you will learn about yourself, others and life.
DanyGirl
Mar 25, 2007, 12:03 AM
I know what the B stands for....can't be BISEXUAL without knowing.
with sports I notice alot of women whom do play sports are butched. I like femme women. You know that girly touch. I don't know much about the gay scene as of yet! That's why i'm trying to find out shit before my 21st b-day. I would love to go to a strip club, get tipsy and have a good time. I'm closeted if you all didnt know. I don't know about lesbian clubs...i would like to know more of the gay "urban" scene. :female:
Hi Candi,
Re-reading your post I am not sure how you meant "girly touch" but just in defense of "sporty dykes" (or butches if you prefer) you might find that the woman on the field is very different than the woman in the bed. The other benefit of dating athletes, we tend to be very aware of how our bodies and those of our team mate's work and that translates very well to the bedroom.
The other thing you might think about is that you are old enough to club in Canada and Chicago isn't far from our border. You might consider getting some friends together and going for a little road trip! I just mapquested Chicago to Toronto and it's about an 8 hour drive. Windsor is even closer and I am told also has some very high quality strip clubs. Pride week is June 15-24th, 2007 in Toronto, with the parade on the 24th if you are interested.
FriedDuck
Mar 25, 2007, 2:21 AM
a lotta lesbian women hate us bi women and refuse to have relationship with us or they think we leave them for man or some bullshite.
candigirl
Mar 25, 2007, 9:39 AM
a lotta lesbian women hate us bi women and refuse to have relationship with us or they think we leave them for man or some bullshite.
I'm with you on that one. Lesbians would befriend us but never date us. Which cool with me i dont care i'm not looking for a lesbian anyways.
Girly touch ment femme women. I'm not into butched women not my type never going to happen.
FriedDuck
Mar 25, 2007, 7:46 PM
I'm with you on that one. Lesbians would befriend us but never date us. Which cool with me i dont care i'm not looking for a lesbian anyways.
Girly touch ment femme women. I'm not into butched women not my type never going to happen.
i date lesbian before and it went fine but she always get mad at me when i say that man is cute (or even just look at man in public or smile be friendly) or when i have male friend visit me.
just bcuz i have male friend or think man is cute it dont mean i want to sleep with him or that i would cheat or screw up relationship with woman. :rolleyes:
we broke up becuz i got annoyed at her thinking i was gonna cheat on her constantly when i never did. it even got to point where if i wore sunglasses she say that i only do that just to look at man so she not know.
candigirl
Mar 25, 2007, 8:24 PM
i date lesbian before and it went fine but she always get mad at me when i say that man is cute (or even just look at man in public or smile be friendly) or when i have male friend visit me.
just bcuz i have male friend or think man is cute it dont mean i want to sleep with him or that i would cheat or screw up relationship with woman. :rolleyes:
we broke up becuz i got annoyed at her thinking i was gonna cheat on her constantly when i never did. it even got to point where if i wore sunglasses she say that i only do that just to look at man so she not know.
yeah i just got off a message board where the lesbians thought bisexuals were spreading STDs.....bullshit. I really feel lesbians are just envious and insecure of bisexual women. here's the reasons
1) Let's just face it. Most lesbians became lesbians because they couldn't fuck men right or weren't enjoying the sex..[boo freaking boo]. sex with men arent always gonna be pleasurable...
2) they actually feed into the sterotypes....[wow apart of the L.G.B.T comunity and ignorant]. We bisexual spread diseases.... like lesbians are freaking saints...i see lesbians fucking around like whores...but bisexual get looked down on?
when it comes down to what sexuality has it the worst? i wouls answer us bisexuals! we have to prove to to lesbians/gays and straight people. Yet i see documentaries on lesbians...and gays crying their butts off about how hard it is to be gay. but quick as hell to say bisexuals are nasty??? give me a break! :flag2: BI PRIDE 4EVA AL DAL EVERYDAY!!!
binshyf
Mar 26, 2007, 10:39 AM
candi i agree and feel ya totally. i am tha same way if u wanna chat some time let me know.
Herbwoman39
Mar 26, 2007, 5:12 PM
Who said i just wanted to fuck a woman? I said i dont wanna waste my time on a friendship if she's not into women. So why be friends first when i can tell her im attracted to her and would like to go out on a date. Like normal people. I'm not a ho, i know how to date well. Its just that women can be a little hasty. waiting to get to know someone before i have sex with them is what i do. :flag1:
Owch! Sorry sweetie! I meant no offense and apologize for any hurt feelings I caused. I *completely* misunderstood what you were getting at.
I hope you'll forgive me.
candigirl
Mar 26, 2007, 7:18 PM
It's okay sweet heart lol no hurts feelings here at all! It's just that i'm one of the rear bisexuals whom are looking for a committed [one guy one girl] type of relationships... :flag2:
Domino
Mar 27, 2007, 2:48 AM
Does a rear bisexual girl men you like it in the arse.?