switching sides...

[joliebruine]

My mind is kind of a mess right now.

I was faily asexual until I came out as a lesbian four years ago. This past year I've had increasing feelings for men. I'm afraid to tell some people who are a: kinda biphobic and b: might accuse me of the whole "gay until graduation" thing (I graduate from college soon, just to make it worse.) My mother will be totally fine and the recent friends I've made know that I consider myself to be bi. It's just so confusing to completely alter my world, my relationships with others, and what I know about myself.
I guess I'm looking for advice from people who went through the same thing.

[NorthBiEast]

Just be you. Be attracted to whomever you want. Find someone you can care for, and who will care for you. It sounds like you are still confused as to exactly who you are. College is the perfect time to figure it out. Don't worry about that ever elusive "other", and worry about being the best, happiest, most successful (whatever that means to you) You you can be.

In the meantime, you'll get no bi-phobia from us!

Welcome!

:upside:

[rayosytruenos]

[...]I was faily asexual until I came out as a lesbian four years ago. This past year I've had increasing feelings for men. I'm afraid to tell some people who are a: kinda biphobic and b: might accuse me of the whole "gay until graduation" thing (I graduate from college soon, just to make it worse.) My mother will be totally fine and the recent friends I've made know that I consider myself to be bi. [...] Hi!

No matter if we have come out as lesbian/gay/straight/bisexual/heterosexual before, we can change our likes with time in a way or another, or maybe we just don't change, it could be that those feelings were always there and we just start discovering them.

What's important is that you have to be happy, no matter if you prefer men, women or both; you have to be true to yourself, and don't worry that much about labels...

Yeah, I think mums always would be happier if their kids were straight, conforming with the main society rules... I came out to my mum and sister a few months ago, saying to them that I also had sex with men. A few days later I went out and happened to have sex with a beautiful girl (whom I repeated another day with). My mum being always a bit nosey, asked me if I enjoyed going out that night, I told her that I did and that I had sex with a girl. She was delighted and said to me: "You see? That's what you have to do, go out more and meet more nice girls..." I was quite amused by her comments, but I can understand her point of view...

All the best,

ray

[flexuality]

My mind is kind of a mess right now.

I was faily asexual until I came out as a lesbian four years ago. This past year I've had increasing feelings for men. I'm afraid to tell some people who are a: kinda biphobic and b: might accuse me of the whole "gay until graduation" thing (I graduate from college soon, just to make it worse.) My mother will be totally fine and the recent friends I've made know that I consider myself to be bi. It's just so confusing to completely alter my world, my relationships with others, and what I know about myself.
I guess I'm looking for advice from people who went through the same thing.

I know what you mean about feeling confused.

Rather than thinking of it as changing or altering my world, I like to think of it as expanding my world. :)

[jamie63]

Ray,
......my mum was the same - ' go and find yrself a nice girl' to which i replied 'but mum, i don't want a nice girl , i want a dirty one!'......it went down like a lead balloon!! LOL :bigrin:

tim

[DeafF2M]

Believe me, I know how you feel....

I was a lesbian at one time... then I came out as transsexual, transitioned... tried to call myself a straight man because I was still with my lesbian partner.... then realized I was still attracted to men. So, I'm now bisexual. Oh, add on the fact that I'm very kinky, into BDSM and leather. My family is now used to me coming out.. I don't know what's next, I've run the gamut, already... Oh, wait, there's polyamorous. LOL

I gave up trying to be less controversial... I just am what I am. :three:

[Azrael]

My mind is kind of a mess right now.

I was faily asexual until I came out as a lesbian four years ago. This past year I've had increasing feelings for men. I'm afraid to tell some people who are a: kinda biphobic and b: might accuse me of the whole "gay until graduation" thing (I graduate from college soon, just to make it worse.) My mother will be totally fine and the recent friends I've made know that I consider myself to be bi. It's just so confusing to completely alter my world, my relationships with others, and what I know about myself.
I guess I'm looking for advice from people who went through the same thing.
I can seriously relate. I thought I was gay, then had a girlfriend for 2 years and thought, "Imust be straight, I guess it was just a phase" then increasingly had feelings towards men. Bless her heart, it was my ex who got me comfortable with the idea of not having to choose a side and just acknowledging that I love people. Admittedly I'm a tad burned out on women lately, but that's just the cyclical nature of my sexuality. Just one of my many moods that tends to rapid cycle back and forth, making my head spin in the process. When I was going manic I became super submissive and hypersexual at the same time, which lead to us ultimately having a lot of problems. At the time I was installing Air Conditioners for a living and she liked me being her strong little man and all. I on the other hand was getting into wearing women's clothing and being tied up and beaten. I was also having some g/f sanctioned boyfun. She said she was fine with it and all, but I don't think she ever was. Eventually we just grew apart. She never knew the extent to which I was suffering. This is probably too much information. *sighs* :( Point of all this is that being bi can be most confusing, and I feel for you.

[rayosytruenos]

Ray,
......my mum was the same - ' go and find yrself a nice girl' to which i replied 'but mum, i don't want a nice girl , i want a dirty one!'......it went down like a lead balloon!! LOL :bigrin:

tim :cutelaugh :cutelaugh :cutelaugh

[flexuality]

Believe me, I know how you feel....

I was a lesbian at one time... then I came out as transsexual, transitioned... tried to call myself a straight man because I was still with my lesbian partner.... then realized I was still attracted to men. So, I'm now bisexual. Oh, add on the fact that I'm very kinky, into BDSM and leather. My family is now used to me coming out.. I don't know what's next, I've run the gamut, already... Oh, wait, there's polyamorous. LOL

I gave up trying to be less controversial... I just am what I am. :three:

Now THAT'S Multi-faceted! LOL! :tong: :) :tong:

[DeafF2M]

Now THAT'S Multi-faceted! LOL! :tong: :) :tong:


Told ya my life was complicated! LOL I wouldn't have it any other way! :flag3: