Flirting with Bi/Gay Guys [Archive]

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smurf111978

Aug 24, 2005, 11:59 PM

Hi

This is my 1st post so apologies in advance for any mistakes

I only came to the conclusion that I am Bi in the last few months and as yet haven’t had any kind of relationship with another guy. I'm still in the "closet" as it were and have only told a couple of friends that I'm BI

I have met a guy a couple of times in the past who I really like and hope to see him again at an event at the weekend. I have been told the guy is Bi/Gay, and as I don’t have much experience I would appreciate any advice you could give me on flirting with guys. I need to keep the flirting subtle as there will be other friends around who I don’t want to know I'm Bi.

Many thanks & best wishes
Smurf

IceLion

Aug 25, 2005, 12:52 AM

Flirting with men is much more of an art than it is with women. I have a little test that seems to work above and beyond my gaydar. Gay first of all is MUCH more easily spotted for obvious reasons, bi is more tricky. This has worked for me, but I make no claims as to how well it will work for others. If there is a guy who I find attractive I simply wink at him. Straight men will turn and do nothing, gay men will wink back, and bi men, well, they will either wink back or come closer.

This has been almost 100% effective for me. Once you have your results, let the filrting, groping, or whatever best suits you commence.

Hope this helps!

-IceLion :bipride:

m.in.heels&hose

Aug 27, 2005, 6:35 AM

great idea ice lion!

i would have never thought of that, but i am going to give it a try, and to think of how simple it really is to do

although i have never made the intiative to make the firts move, and i have tired to give signs that i was interested, but did not want to be the aggressor,

thank you very much for the great idea and tip :flag1:

nakedambrosia

Aug 27, 2005, 8:06 PM

My concern, if you past the flirting stage, is your health. Having sex these days is extremely dangerous. Not only HIV is more than present, other diseases such as hepatitis and STDs are rampant. Though sex is a very powerful force, one should always use caution. The chances of you getting hepatitis are greater than HIV-however, hepatitis will, in time cause cirrhosis of the liver and eventually liver cancer. This is a reality you have to face-and my advice is to put yourself in protective status by practicing safe sex if ever you go past the flirting stage.

m.in.heels&hose

Aug 28, 2005, 1:32 PM

thank you naked ambrosia for your concern, but i do beleive in safe sex, and have made it a religious practice for many years
i do however feel it should go with out saying that safe sex should be practiced!

chad2012

Jun 14, 2012, 7:45 PM

Waylon

Jun 15, 2012, 10:13 AM

I agree with Chad and perhaps a hand on the knee or thigh might indicate more interest.

FinkDoodle

Jun 15, 2012, 1:41 PM

I agree with eye contact. A hand on the knee is about as subtle as a cherry bomb . .

69luvr

Jun 15, 2012, 2:17 PM

I absolutely agree with you. EYE contact is a must!

69luvr

Jun 15, 2012, 2:18 PM

a hand on a knee could also be condusive to a punch in the eye. MAKE eye contact and you will be safer!

The Bisexual Virgin

Jun 15, 2012, 4:15 PM

But how does a girl go about flirting with a bisexual man?

wanderingrichard

Jun 15, 2012, 5:18 PM

But how does a girl go about flirting with a bisexual man?

seriously? its not that hard, in fact its the same way she would go after any normal guy, but maybe with a bit more effort to make sure he understands.

Cherokee_Mountaincat

Jun 15, 2012, 5:49 PM

Flirting with a Bi man is as easy as pie, Hon. Smile, talk openly, honestly, be yourself. But so as the gentlemen here suggested: Get his gaze and hold it, showing that you are interested. A sly slile and small wink produces great results. And unles. like an old friend used to say, you have to "Drop a rock on his head" then he should get the hint. With most men if you show an interest in them, it gets their attention.
Good luck and have fun, but play safe at all times.
Hugs Hon.
Cat

FinkDoodle

Jun 15, 2012, 10:03 PM

The tricky part for us guys is knowing when girls are actually INTERESTED in bisexual men. . . It seems like it's such a forbidden topic that nobody brings it into conversation at all. So, don't be shy about it, ladies . . we're generally not the ones who bring that up since we've been severely conditioned by women running away screaming when we try to be honest about it.

onewhocares

Jun 16, 2012, 11:22 PM

I shall agree with CAT....

ONE step at a Time

Flirting with a Bi man is as easy as pie, Hon. Smile, talk openly, honestly, be yourself. But so as the gentlemen here suggested: Get his gaze and hold it, showing that you are interested. A sly slile and small wink produces great results. And unles. like an old friend used to say, you have to "Drop a rock on his head" then he should get the hint. With most men if you show an interest in them, it gets their attention.
Good luck and have fun, but play safe at all times.
Hugs Hon.
Cat

by~his~side

Jun 16, 2012, 11:34 PM

seriously? its not that hard, in fact its the same way she would go after any normal guy, but maybe with a bit more effort to make sure he understands.

Wandering....did you mean straight guy instead of normal guy?;)

Bisexual Explorer

Jun 17, 2012, 7:43 AM

bi~his~side,
You know that bisexual men are not "normal." "Normal" is much too pedistrian. Bisexual men have the advantage of enjoying sex with either gender and occassionally with both at the same time. I think we are better described as "super-normal."

Back to flirting. I am one of those guys who needs a rock dropped on their head. Maybe if I met Cat, something I hope to do someday, I would catch on. But until then, I have been incapable of knowing the difference between flirting and just pleasant conversation. I met a guy in a hotel bar while on a business trip, and we started talking. He made eye contact, smiled, licked his lips. I made eye contact, smiled, and went back discussing the baseball game on the bar TV. He tried again; same response from me. Finally, he reached under the bar, put his hand on my crotch (he must have picked up something about me that made him willing to take the chance), and told me he wanted to take me back to his room. That's the kind of rock I need. Oh yes, I went and am glad I did. Looking back I wonder about the number of missed opportunities.
Bisexual Explorer

Waylon

Jun 17, 2012, 8:57 PM

a hand on a knee could also be condusive to a punch in the eye. MAKE eye contact and you will be safer!

I agree I kinda blew it with my post about the hand on the knee. Eye contact is the best and take it from there.

bibiboy

Jun 19, 2012, 5:14 PM

Had to share...had my first guy "come on to me" in a bar this past weekend. I was getting a drink for my gf and me and "R" introduced himself with a big smile! We chatted a moment or two as I waited for the bartender to bring me a couple of beers. Before I knew it he was hugging and rubbing on me with the same big smile and making unbroken eye contact the entire time. It probably only lasted 15 seconds but seemed waaaaaay longer. I bought him a drink just before I headed back to the table and told her what had just happened. She was ecstatic, and immediately wanted to check him out. Not that cute really and definitely not my type but hey it was fun!

Cherokee_Mountaincat

Jun 19, 2012, 11:41 PM

Well Thank You BSE.. :} I imagine we could get into a great deal of delightful trouble going out together somewhere. (Hush Rich)
Hugzz
Cat

69luvr

Jun 20, 2012, 3:01 PM

But how does a girl go about flirting with a bisexual man?

It is exactly the same as with straight men. CLEAVAGE and eye contact!

wanderingrichard

Jun 20, 2012, 10:51 PM

Wandering....did you mean straight guy instead of normal guy?;)

sorry, i usually dont make a distinction unless a guy is flamingly gay. i've known a lot of str8 women wh've made the mistake of trying to pick up attractive gay men, most of whom you'd never know were gay, or in my case, bi, cuz we don;t dress or act outre'. Cat can tell you, i'm the most normal, under the radar, bi man you;ll ever meet until we get private. :bigrin:

wanderingrichard

Jun 20, 2012, 11:01 PM

Well Thank You BSE.. :} I imagine we could get into a great deal of delightful trouble going out together somewhere. (Hush Rich)
Hugzz
Cat

Heh, go for it, maybe you;ll get kicked out of another mongolian grill in the process. :bigrin:

Cherokee_Mountaincat

Jun 21, 2012, 4:19 AM

LMAO We were not kicked out. We were just asked to leave because they were closing. Cant help it if we sat there and chatted away all night..lol
Cat

Cherokee_Mountaincat

Jun 21, 2012, 4:26 AM

Hey! Dont bring me into this!! I didnt know you were bi til we were eye-tracking the same guy on our first "date" I looked at the Cowboy type in those tight jeans and said, "Nice ass" You went "Meh, I've seen and had better" then blushed clear to your toes. lol
Laughing Cat

Plumhead2

Jun 21, 2012, 8:20 AM

I have to get to the Northwest quick. Cat and Rich could give seminars on Flirting. Lord knows I could use help in that department. Hey, what an idea: We need a Bi, Gay, and Str8 flirting website. FlirtsAreUs.com or FlirtWorld.com You two can teach flirting and I will write the copy and produce the videos. Come on Cat, we could get rich and then buy the damn Mongolian grill!

Hey! Dont bring me into this!! I didnt know you were bi til we were eye-tracking the same guy on our first "date" I looked at the Cowboy type in those tight jeans and said, "Nice ass" You went "Meh, I've seen and had better" then blushed clear to your toes. lol
Laughing Cat