A question for Julia Childs

[fishfry29]

God...I hope this dont sound too kinky. Being a bonifide card carrying cum freak, and being cautious about recieving it straight from the fauscet (I require my sexual partners to use condoms) I am looking for a readily available substitute.
Does anyone know how to make a mixture or "witches brew" that looks and taste like real man cum? I realise that all cum taste different, depending on diet, however am hopeing some other pervs have experemented with mixtures. You know....2 parts yogurt, 1 part salt...etc..etc.

[spartca]

I have observed that cum behaves a lot like egg whites - it must be some sort of emulsion like that.

You're looking for protein suspended in water with a very basic, high pH balance. This high pH gives it it's slippery characteristics and smell (have you ever noticed cum smells like bleach?), except that it gets super sticky upon contact with air, due to the protein oxidizing?

I would start with egg whites and then maybe add baking soda for the alkalinity and color and go from there...