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View Full Version : Are more Gen-X people BI?



leizy
Apr 5, 2005, 4:34 PM
It's a given, at least for now, that homosexuality and bisexuality are less stigmatized today than at any other time in recent US history (yes, I know that Harlem in the 20's was a "hotbed" of bisexuality, but that wasn't nationwide, and went away pretty quickly.).

My wife and I are both 32, and both are bisexual. It seems to us that a lot more people of our generation are comfortable exploring bisexuality (and not just 2 girls putting on a show at a club. real bisexuality.)

What do others think?
cheers.
d

Brian
Apr 5, 2005, 7:56 PM
Interesting thoughts leizy - I've often wondered about the same thing. What I have seen being involved in the bisexual community for at least 4 years, and running many bi websites over the same time period, is data that is almost paradoxical. Here's what I mean...

In my experience, members of bi websites tend to be older than the average surfer - just scanning the profiles of my old bi sites (before I opened Bisexual.com) I would say the average age was, oh, 38 or so.

And yet, my personal experience jives with yours - that people in their twenties and early thirties are more accepting of bisexuality and more willing to follow through on feelings of "bicuriosity".

So I wonder if those in their 20s and early 30s consider it all to be not that abnormal - it's just part of their lives (I think some even equate "metrosexuality" with bisexuality in that generation - but I know that's argumentative because it depends on your definition of metrosexuality).

But those of us who are a bit older need the help of the internet to explore their bisexuality, because our age group is more repressed in comparison. I've often said (to anyone who will listen, which is never very many ;)) that bisexuality and the internet go together like peanut butter and jam - what I mean is the internet let's people explore their bisexuality like never before; with anonimity, and from the comfort of one's home, and without the risk of being arrested or beaten. It's ideal for the "late bloomer" - the middle aged man or woman or couple who just now wants to explore this aspect of who they are.

So maybe that is why the demographics of bi websites suggest an older bi population, and yet at the same time personal experience suggests the younger population is more accepting (and perhaps more practising?) of bisexuality.

That's my thoughts on the subject. And I would love to here other thoughts on this. :three:

- Drew :paw:

ps. I also would LOVE to hear about Harlem in the twenties if you or anyone has more info on that! It sounds fascinating and it's the first I've heard that.

leizy
Apr 6, 2005, 6:14 PM
I've read about the Harlem Renaissance and bisexuality somewhere - probably in an essay in Bi People Speak Out. But, a websearch offered a few links -
http://www.robynochs.com/website/writing/bisexual_movement.html
http://www.glbtq.com/literature/harlem_renaissance.html

Essentially, several of the singers and musicians and writers of the day were bi or willing to... Bessie Smith, Billie Holiday, etc.

cheers.
d

sensualforyou
Apr 10, 2005, 1:27 AM
Hi All,

I'm new to the board, but I'm pretty sure the board is also new :)

I was wondering the same thing myself & also came to the conclusion that yes, most young ones are bi these days & it makes it much easier for them to form healthy solid relationships & friendships.

Unfortunately I still see it being one-sided: either gay or straight. Being bi is a term that is rarely used. I was watching the Biography of Elton John tonight & even he called himself bi, back in the 70's, but supposedly everyone was doing that & probably most didn't understand it b/c it was just about "free love".

The problem for me is that not a lot of people around my age (39) are what I call biamorous & most I've come across are just looking for sex instead of friendship & love.

So while I've known I'm truly bi for at least 4 yrs. now, I haven't been able to really meet a lot of others like myself nor form even a long lasting friendship with someone who is bi, let along have a loving relationship with a woman.

I work from home, live out in Miss. now with no car & these days am very busy, so it's not like I can meet like minded types at the drop of a hat.

I rely upon the net for any kind of social networking to start off with & unfortunately a lot of the time the net is mainly about sex.

Anyway, I haven't given up :) & I'm really happy to see younger people who feel that being bi is "the norm" as apposed to something that scares them.

My one question though is, is this just a fad for them, or will it continue on into their adult years?

I'm talking about teens.

Thanks & have a great Sunday everyone :)


Michelle

sashawillowick
Apr 11, 2005, 3:01 AM
I think it's the prominance of gay/bisexual situations on tv, etc. that have made it more normal and acceptable which relieves some of the fear of judgment that some people feel about coming out...but i am sure that it's always been like this, just more under wraps and suppressed...

:)

sensualforyou
Apr 23, 2005, 3:27 AM
I was just talking w/ a bi woman the other night & said to her that on TV, even if the character starts off being bi, they end up turning gay/lez or back to being straight again w/ the opinion that she was just going thru a phase.

Except in "The L Word" of course. Which reminds me. I went & got Showcase thinking it was going to be a whole new season only to find out it was only repeats from last season. I just left Showcase a VM maessage, but I dont' think I'll hear back from them as they are swamped w/ calls.

Any news on who's going to air the next season?

Thanks :) & have a great wknd.


Michelle



I think it's the prominance of gay/bisexual situations on tv, etc. that have made it more normal and acceptable which relieves some of the fear of judgment that some people feel about coming out...but i am sure that it's always been like this, just more under wraps and suppressed...

:)

Starshine
Apr 24, 2005, 3:04 PM
Ok so I am they "new guy" but this question caught my eye as i was exploring the site. In my mind I don't think there are more or less of us out there just more of us being open now that being bi is not so taboo as it used to be though there are exceptions to every rule i do find it sad and disturbing that it is 10x more acceptable to be a bi fem than a bi male it just proves to be yet another example of a societal double standard. i do however find it interesting that these days they are finding many more public figure both past and present that seem to share a common ground with the rest of us.... learning the truth of self discovery

foreverbisexy
Apr 24, 2005, 10:57 PM
I know from my own experience... at 35 when I come out to someone my age or older... I get lots of questions, comments and withdrawl LOL but with friends in their 20's (female anyway's) it's is "oh cool, no biggie so how was your day!" kind of thing....

so I do think it is getting easier... the men though don't have it as easy that is a double standard big time.

Foreverbisexy~

sensualforyou
Apr 29, 2005, 2:26 AM
I agree w/ both of you. Men do have it harder, but you know what? Just b/c I'm female doesn't make it any easier for me to find women who are also bi & aren't just looking for sex or have issues w/ their biness.

So while I am proud of who I am & don't have a problem being out to whomever, that doesn't mean it's any easier for women to find other like minded women.

If you just want sex, hey, go to a bar, but to me that's not what being bi is all about.

Good luck to you in being a bi male :) I feel for you. It's even harder for you to find men that aren't just looking to jump into bed.

Unfortunately the majority of society now has one thing on their minds & love & relationships are considered taboo & that I have found no matter what the age.

Sad, but reality.

Have a great wknd. :)


Michelle

bigregory
May 1, 2005, 8:57 PM
no i dont think there are any more gen x bi's then older folk.
no it all come down to the internet and the P.C.
there was just no information out there 20 years or so ago(except for limited
text in obscure publications and these gay or les not bi)
yes they had the web they could read, see, interact and yes chat with others.yes now its just common knowledge that a large portion of the population is not st8,so its just natural that it would seem there are more.
oh yes bi the way the people that write all these new television shows that have gay-bi les content
also have computers..... coincidence i think not!

bigregory :flag3:

gayle
May 6, 2005, 5:32 AM
Well, to hear my teenage daughter talk, you'd think that easily 75-percent of teens are bi or gay. She's always telling me about so-and-so who came out as being gay or bi. Funny, but she never mentions that anyone is str8. Perhaps str8 people are an endangered species in her generation?
I suspect that it is easier for younger people to explore their sexuality, and at a younger age as often they live in a single parent home or in a home where both parents work, or they are given a lot of freedom to spend unsupervised time with their friends. Funny, but when I was 17, I still wasn't all that interested in sex, but she seemed obsessed by the topic. Maybe she was just trying to see if she could upset mom or give me a few gray hairs? I always tried to be open with her, available to talk about any subject, even if I didn't like what I was hearing. Maybe that is part of the reason I heard so much from her about her bi or gay friends. Now I wonder if she might have wanted me to set firmer boundaries for her? I'm not sure. . .
Honestly, I only know one bi person where I'm sure that is the case, that they are bi. I know some lesbians. Most of my friends are quiet on the subject of sexuality so I might be surrounded by bi & gay friends and be totally clueless about it. I suspect I am totally lacking in radar abilities! Or maybe it is more a matter that I don't seek to define who a person is based on their sexual preference. Maybe if I were more interested in what everyone else is doing in the bedroom I'd be more likely to notice. What does surprise me is the number of friends that I have who DO profess to be swingers, although they never go further and state they are gay or bi or str8.
Anyhow, that's my :2cents: on this subject! You've probably noticed by now that I am quite opinionated. . .
Thanks for giving me a safe forum to express my thoughts and to learn more about bi, gay and str8. It's been very helpful to me! :wiggle2:

Hey, Drew! When are you going to create a cowgirl icon for me???

darkmoon1214
May 27, 2005, 12:00 PM
Me and my husband have been bi are whole life's we have only been married 3 years but we have been together off and on for over 10 years.I beleve that we genration x are much more in to trying new things and living on the edge.The more partners we have had the better we think we are male or female it dose not matter.we do have a understanding we my be bi but we do not mix im only to be with women and he is only to be with males.We never have 3 some.I beleave we vowed to be together and no matter what any one thinks its bettew us what we chose.

Apleasureseeker
May 31, 2005, 12:22 AM
GREAT topic, but so many different issues incorporated in this thread.
Here's what I see (roughly in the order that it comes up in thead):
1) Bisexuality is more open & accepted --for women mostly--due to it's intensified presence in the media. The reason it's there isn't altruistic: sex sells. Anything sexual that goes one step past what's been done by your competitors will get more attention. Attention =bucks. The downside is that kids are being sold sexual personna (personnae?) too soon. There's no time to really develop their own sexuality (or personality, for that matter).
2) For may different reasons, people 30+ start to become open to bisexuality. Partly from seeking new experiences, partly form biological changes, perhaps lonliness or other emotional trauma.
3) The advent of new media enables the subject to get more exposure.
4) Bisex means different things to different people. Some are looking for emotional/sexual connections connections, some only sexual, some only emotional. (A lesbian friend complained that all the girls she meets just want to talk, and she can never get sex!)
5) Double standards are rampant! Bisexual women that I've met generally don't approve of bisexuality in a man. Lots of bisexual women who are very selective in their hetero-life have almost no standards in their homo-life. The girl-girl aspect becomes a secret world of total freedom & the hetero-side becomes oddly conservative. That CAN'T be emotionally healthy.
6) There's too much pressure now to assume an identity. I had several girlfriends when i was younger who claimed to be bi, but when they described their first experiences, it sounded like sexual assault. Assuming that they were bi was a coping mechanism, and hey went on to having serious troubles with trust & other relationship issues. Someone inexperienced can be easily manipulated, especially women/girls, especially by older women. But it's true for guys too.
Anyway, that's enough for a while! :2cents:

Fresia
Apr 8, 2015, 1:06 PM
Bump it up!

charles-smythe
Apr 8, 2015, 2:51 PM
It's a given, at least for now, that homosexuality and bisexuality are less stigmatized today than at any other time in recent US history (yes, I know that Harlem in the 20's was a "hotbed" of bisexuality, but that wasn't nationwide, and went away pretty quickly.).

My wife and I are both 32, and both are bisexual. It seems to us that a lot more people of our generation are comfortable exploring bisexuality (and not just 2 girls putting on a show at a club. real bisexuality.)

What do others think?
cheers.
d...I don't think there are more...just more pen about it...

tenni
Apr 8, 2015, 4:11 PM
I think that a lot has changed since this thread was started. Previously, despite some other people's experience the concept of being bisexual was unknown in my circles.

I'm not sure if we are still referring to young people in their 20's as gen X(don't think so). Younger people over the past ten years have had more exposure and information about sexuality. I think that it may be more common today for younger people to ponder the idea of sexuality and which gender(s) they are attracted to. My younger nephew is 21 and appears heterosexual. For some reason he also has a bit of ol boy bigot in him when it comes to other men who are not hetero. The taboos are still there. The knowledge is wider known imo.

Country Guy
Apr 9, 2015, 11:06 AM
Wasn't Gen X the one just before the millenials? So that would put Gen X in their 40's and the millenials are teens and 20's. I think.

Jimcadams34
May 19, 2015, 7:32 AM
My wife and I are bisexuals and we have an exciting sex life. If you really want to spice up your bisexual fantasies, have a look at bestporncams.com (http://bestporncams.com). They have got some arousing bisexual videos and even amateur clips where couples having fun in some threesome acts. Take a lot and tell me what you think!

charles-smythe
May 19, 2015, 9:11 AM
http://www.bisexual.com/forum/images/styles/lifeElement/misc/quote_icon.png Originally Posted by leizy http://www.bisexual.com/forum/images/styles/lifeElement/buttons/viewpost-right.png (http://www.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?p=115#post115)
yes, I know that Harlem in the 20's was a "hotbed" of bisexuality, but that wasn't nationwide, and went away pretty quickly…actually I didn’t know…but I would like to hear more about it…

12voltyV2.0
May 20, 2015, 12:14 PM
At first, I saw the "5" in the year of the original post and got excited when I saw a posting by Drew---but then realized the OP was done ten years ago---I am sure the person who first posted this---is long gone----but I think the real question now is not to be concerned with whether "Gen-Xers" are more bi--and ask if the "Millennials" are more bi or accepting of bisexuality.

sysper
May 20, 2015, 1:42 PM
At first, I saw the "5" in the year of the original post and got excited when I saw a posting by Drew---but then realized the OP was done ten years ago---I am sure the person who first posted this---is long gone----but I think the real question now is not to be concerned with whether "Gen-Xers" are more bi--and ask if the "Millennials" are more bi or accepting of bisexuality.
our society is getting worse in some ways but at least more people are accepting of anything other than heterosexuality, which has been around all along despite people trying to deny it.

sysper
May 20, 2015, 1:44 PM
by bisexuality hopefully that means more than girls making out with each other only cause it's trendy & get's a guy's attention..........although i do have to admit it does get my attention to say the least, but it's just as ok for 2 guys to do the same for the same reasons.