Bi and Cross Dressing

[Dougie]

Hi all I was wondering if any members have found as they get a little older they get turned on by things that in the past had no interest. I`m in my mid forties now and over the last couiple of years I have been turned on by dressing up in female cloths, bra, panties, stockings etc as well as wearing a dress. I fantasies about making love to a man when dressed up and playing the role of the girl i.e laying under the man. What I`m interested in have any other members found they have perhaps some strange turn ons now they are a bit older?

I would love to hear from you if you have, Dougie.

[izzfan]

Strangely enough for me, I discovered my Bi side when I was about 16/17....Now, my CDing side, I discovered THAT when I was 13 lol. As for making love to a man while CDing, its an interesting thought and it could be quite erotic (if I didnt find anal so uncomfortable lol)... when I'm CDing I actually tend to become more 'straight' (or 'lesbian' depending on how you view it) which can be interesting... as for other turn-ons, I can't say that I have acquired any new ones but I have lost a few, when I was about 14, I used to think those 'hoodie' sweaters that chavs now tend to wear were hot [ didn't matter whether it was a man or a woman wearing it]... needless to say, now I dont really find it any sort of turn on. Strange.

Izzfan
(Ps: I'm only 18 at the moment so I probably can't answer the question about turn-ons in later life fully yet)

[Dougie]

Hi Izzfan

If your only 18 I wouldnt worry too much about any `"strange" turn ons for a few years, I don`t think I had any when I was younger. Though saying that you`d be amazed how dressing up in female cloths can turn you on theres no doubt fot me it makes me feel very sexy. As for anal, I have only fantasised about it though I have used an anal vibrator when playing with myself. I would like to go with a man just to see how far I would go, haae you beeen with any men?

I send a picture of me dressed up and await to hear

Dougie

[diamond_tether]

I've had a couple of kinks appear as I got older, but that was more a result of having the freedom to express them. I got away from certain settings and life situations which hindered some of that stuff in my head. I've been cross dressing for years (I can pass as a woman when I want to) and now I've begun performing in drag. As for the other kinks, I'm glad I had the chance to expand and grow. I figure as time goes on I'll find even more kinks, but it's mostly a matter of just having the freedom to try anything once (or more if i end up enjoying it). It can be difficult to even be aware of a kink until you get a chance to try something similar or releated first, as well. :male:

[spartca]

I just did a paper for my Sexuality class on crossdressing.

One of the most interesting things about crossdressing is that it is one clear-cut example of discrimination against *straight men*: the DSM-IV-TR criteria for diagnosing "Transvestic Fetishism" specify that only straight men can be diagnosed with this "disorder." The characteristic compulsive, auto-erotic, and possibly gender dysphoric characteristics can be present in drag queens or kings, for example, but it is not considered a pshchiatric disorder in gay men or women in general.

Then what about bi men? Should they be diagnosed as straight or gay? No guidance here from the DSM! Another example of bi invisibility, although one we don't necessarily want them to address... hopefully crossdressing will be removed altogether from the DSM in the next revision.

There is a great short story about "extreme" cross-dressing written by a bi guy in the book "Bi Men: Coming Out Every Which Way" that is *extremely* hot, for those of you who have an interest:

http://www.amazon.com/Bi-Men-Coming-Every-Which/dp/1560236140/sr=1-1/qid=1166045989/ref=sr_1_1/002-9179785-2252021?ie=UTF8&s=books

Oh, and my paper has a case study with proposed treatment plan in case anyone's in therapy addressing their crossdressing... I'd be happy to share it.

[TorontoGuy2007]

i'm sorta the opposite.. i'm just starting to realize my bi curiousity in the present, but cross dressing has been a part of my life for about 8 years now. not really sure what brought it on. it started with an interest in wearing bra and panties.. then it sorta escalated from there.. i've never gone out in public, but as soon as i get home from work, it's time to change into something comfortable! usually bra and thong and sometimes nylon tights.. love those things too! i've been shaving my underarms, legs and pubic area for about 6 years.. and actually do complete body shaving for about 4 years now.. makes me feel more girly, i suppose!

whether i am fantasizing about making love to a woman or a man, i always invision myself dressed up in bra and panties or thong.. don't think i'd want to have sex any other way! (well, i guess the panties would eventually have to come off, but, you get the idea.. lol)

[chook]

I look at it this way.....after several beers who gives a fuck if its wearing a skirt or pants.


Cheers Chook :bigrin:

[Gemini523]

I was wondering if any members have found as they get a little older they get turned on by things that in the past had no interest. I`m in my mid forties now and over the last couiple of years I have been turned on by dressing up in female cloths, bra, panties, stockings etc as well as wearing a dress. I fantasies about making love to a man when dressed up and playing the role of the girl i.e laying under the man.


This is why I am part of this forum. I often think I am alone in my thoughts, feelings, and desires, and then I read about someone who shares these same experiences.

I too was in my forties before I had a serious thought that I was anything but heterosexual. Then my new wife started initiating some unusual bedroom moves that got my attention. That led to crossdressing, which led to full-scale desire for another man. I sometimes wonder where all thesae feelings came from, and where they will lead me. Oh, and the wife loves the changes I have gone through, and I think is waiting for me to take the next step (which she wants to be there to watch!).

I wear stockings and a "g" under my clothes just about everyday now, and regularly shave everything below the waist, under the arms, and the top of my chest (the hair that shows when I wear a bra). Another writer got the reason why- body shaving is an intimately feminine act, and the end result is smooth skin that feels and looks very feminine. When I look at myself in a dress, I see what I would look like as a woman. The full crossdressing I do is very private, just the wife and I, but I do worry about what might happen if I were found to be wearing women's clothes (and painted toenails) under my everyday workclothes, say because of an accident or someone walking into my bathroom stall. The chance of discovery is perhaps part of the thrill too.

The desire to be under a man, now, that comes with the feminine mind-set, I guess, and came after I started crossdressing. I do fantasize about being with a man while I am dressed as a woman. My wife and I play all kinds of bedroom games now that involve gender switching, toys, etc., and our fantasy play also usually involves telling stories about me having hot sex with a guy while she is watching. The more we do that, the more I find myself wanting to do it for real, and I know the wife would be into it. I only very recently "enabled my ad" on this site, so we will see what happens. All this in my middle age!

So in short, the answer to the original question is "yes".

[ziggybabie]

I've had fantasies like that a while. It's just a hot fantasy for me. The closest thing I'll get to the sexual fantasy of being a woman during sex, since I'm not planning on a sex change or giving up my manhood, any time soon. lol.

Most of my fantasies involve hard sex, though. Something hot about wearing all that getup, nails, bra and panties, high heels, long stockings, lipstick.....(especially hot after seeing how passable or hot some of the cute younger and skinnier CD boys look.)....


Then having some bigger guy order me around and shove his huge erection into me at his own discretion. Not sure if I'd be a good sub, though. I guess "submissives" aren't supposed to talk shit, back to their "masters". lol.

Also, women wearing male drag (business suit, fake beard, smoking a cigar, etc) with a strapon poking through their business slacker's "cockhole", . Role reversal, kinda.

I've only done the CD thing once or twice, though. It mostly remains a fantasy.

[TorontoGuy2007]

wow, lots of great replies on this thread.. really cool.

hmmm, i can relate to the "fear" of someone discovering what i am really wearing under my business clothing.. could be an interesting shock to the co-workers if i ever pass out at work and they have to take my pants off! hehe..

[spartca]

hmmm, i can relate to the "fear" of someone discovering what i am really wearing under my business clothing.. could be an interesting shock to the co-workers if i ever pass out at work and they have to take my pants off! hehe..

You'd like that, wouldn't you? Maybe I should visit you in your office next time I'm in Toronto... ;)

[TorontoGuy2007]

at the rate this job is going, i'm probably going to faint from exhaustion or burn out soon.. so if you do come visit me, make sure you bring an ambulance! ..lol

[spartca]

Oooh, I can't wait to see the paramedics' faces... that's hot!

[ancestral]

mm, not to burst any bubbles here :p as im sure most of you realize by now, im a paramedic and lemme tell ya, theres nothing you could do to yourself, or wear that would shock us, at least any medic that has a bit of experience under his/her belt. as for cross dressing, all i gotta say is if mens clothes where as comfortable and luxurious as womens, i dont think thered be such a thing as cross dressers. :bigrin:

[someotherguy]

I have no experience with cross dressing. Here in Texas there is a lot of ranch dressing.

[ancestral]

something i forgot to mention, while it wouldnt surprise me in the least to find out my patient is a crossdresser, my reaction could well be "hmm, i wonder if i would look good in that?" ;)

[GypsyButterfly]

I'm a woman & I don't really like dressing as one. I rarely wear skirts or dresses & I can't stand nylons or heels. I'm much more comfortable in pants. My two main girly things are long dangly earrings & lotions. I have more lotions than I can actually use, but, I just love the different scents. Also, I think guys who dress like women, especially those who are passable, are hot.

[DiamondDog]

I like drag kings.

[Danielle_T]

Wow ! yes there are a lot of replies here. I find this great because it opens up the community to more understanding....if you want to know......ask. I also love it when a GG (Genetic Girl) weighs in and lets us know she's ok with it(GypsyButterfly). I have a fiancee' that totally adores my "other side" and we play together once in a while that way too!

The whole lifestyle is not as uncommon as one might think. The numbers are growing (for reasons unbeknownst to me, maybe something in the water) and constantly i look at Police officers, Judges, Lawyers, Doctors etc.etc. and wonder .......hmmmm ? what's he wearing under his clothes.?

I am proudly one of them (a Bi-sexual Transvestite) and have been one since i was a kid. It was something i was cofused about in my younger years and went to great lengths to hid. As i grew older i found myself in situations where i could embrace it more and so did. I am now in my 40's and have finally become comfortable with whom/what i am, sad to say it took all these years.

My first bi-sexual encounter happened quite recently (of course i was en-femme) and he and i both had a wonderful experience and it has only left me wanting more. Of course, a man will NERVER replace the woman that i love and she knows that but, as it turns out anyway, we are both bi which is fantastic as we can both discuss our desires openly without fear and shame and we often do. We are both products of divorce and have found each other and have started our lives together with openness and honest and thus it will remain.

Anyway, i suppose my point is....to address your original question Dougie, i suppose (by circumstances) my life kicke into high gear sexually speaking when i entered my 40's and i'm loving it......bring it on......wink wink!

Love....Dani

[LoveLion]

OK, I was reluctant to put this because I dont want to be called intolerant or anything, but its the truth about how I feel so I feel I should share.

Cross dressing has always been weird for me. It something I would never do, and have never had a desire to do. I like men's cloths and I look better in them then I would in womens. I would also feel very uncomfortable wearing women's clothing. (Except maybe undergarments that no one can see)

When it comes to other people cross dressing, I dont know why, but It makes me uncomfortable to be around them. I never feel uncomfortable around anyone else or any other group, but for some reason I do aroung drag queens and kings. I cant explain it as I have never had any bad experiences or anything, and I never feel this way about any other type of person. I belevie if someone wants to wear cloths of the opposite gender, then all power to them, but I dont think I could ever be in a relationship or anything with a cross dresser. I wish it wasnt this way for me, I want to be able to hang around them as much as anyone else, but I just simply get this inexplicable weird feelings around them. Maybe it is because I dont understand the idea or motivation behind it.

So there you have it, It may seem intolerant, and maybe it is, but unfortunatly, to my own dismay, thats how I feel.

Maybe if you guys an gals who have crossdressed before could explain it more to me (motivation, how you feel, why you do it) I may be able to overcome this aversion I have t cross dressing.

Thanks

[TorontoGuy2007]

Hi Lion,

>Maybe if you guys an gals who have crossdressed before could explain it more >to me (motivation, how you feel, why you do it)

hmmm, i keep asking myself, every time i dress up, why i do it.. i still don't really have an answer.. i have always been very feminine in terms of my emotions. another part of me sort of feels i am a woman trapped in a man's body.. maybe it's just my way of dealing with the empty feelings in my life.. maybe it's my way of trying to create a girl out of myself that i can love..
or maybe it's just me trying to rebel against society.. i've never been one to conform to norms..

bottom line, i'm just one heck of a strange and confused person.. but i seem to feel good about myself and feel more sexy when i dress up, so i suppose that's why i do it.

there's also this little power trip i get when i can walk around the world and nobody but me knows what i am really wearing under my so called normal business attire!

anyway, those are my thoughts.. i guess crossdressing just isn't for everybody, and if you are comfortable being a man and dressing like a man, then i suppose that is good news!

[bm_jim]

>Maybe if you guys an gals who have crossdressed before could explain it more to me (motivation, how you feel, why you do it) I may be able to overcome this aversion I have t cross dressing.<

I would have to say I CD because I feel sexy in silk. no one looks at a pretty girl that is wearing her boyfriends shirt and thinks it's wierd or would show an aversion to her. Society dictates what clthing guys are allowed to wear but girls can wear mens clothing underwear to outer wear and it is not only acceptable but many times sexy, I started wearing womens clothing when I was very young (about 10) wearing womens robes and sleepwear, then I began wearing panties in my mid teens. after getting out of school and out on my own I for many years wore dresses and make up in private then I dressed for Holloween once and had several straight guys hit on me, I had to prove myself to them even with my g/f telling them I was crossed. I was confident enough after that to go out in public if I want. I guess the overall reason I CD is that I feel sexy in my clothes, skirt or pants. The same reason a non CD'er wears the clothes they wear to the club on friday nite.

Jim

[Danielle_T]

LoveLion, that's the beauty of the society you live in sugar, you don't HAVE to love or understand anything. Tolerance is a wonderful thing when it works and, at the best of times we could all learn to exercise it a little more.

As far as explaining the reasons why Crossdressers or anyone else for that matter do the things that they do, well, i really don't think i could explain the myriad reasons for that. Why doofficials wear uniforms? Doctors? Pilots? Waitresses? why do people belong to the BDSM community and wear the garb they wear?.....well, maybe sometimes it's all about our identity (or lack thereof) needing, no, wanting to belong or quite the opposite.....to stand out.

Maybe, just maybe as the great Sigmund Freud stated...."sometimes a cigar is just a cigar".

That having been said, if i could understand the reasons why i am a Bi-Sexual Transvesite and, better yet, stop it altogether.....i would.....or would i? hmmmmmm?

Love as always.....Dani

[Hoselvr]

I am bisexual and I love crossdressing when the opportunities present themselves. I am now 36 years old and have been crossdressing and been bisexual since the age of 5 when I played dress up secretly with my Mom's pantyhose, heels and dresses as well as my first encounter with another boy my age. At that time, I did not know I was bisexual, but looking back I know I was because I remember enjoying the feelings of being with someone of the same sex even if it was only oral and heavy petting. I did know at that time how wonderful and feminine female clothing was and fell in love with wearing pantyhose and stockings, high heels (which were too big for me at the time), and the way a dress or skirt would gently sway against my silky legs giving me an erection. Both bisexuality and crossdressing are such wonderful feelings which I fully embrace now in private. That being said, I am not promiscuous and someone on the street would never know I am bi or that I like to crossdress. Society can still be very judgemental and potentially deadly regarding people who don't fit in. I'm not the type of person to be flambouyant anyway.

[Fred_Brice]

Hi all I was wondering if any members have found as they get a little older they get turned on by things that in the past had no interest. I`m in my mid forties now and over the last couple of years I have been turned on by dressing up in female cloths, bra, panties, stockings etc as well as wearing a dress. I fantasies about making love to a man when dressed up and playing the role of the girl i.e laying under the man. What I`m interested in have any other members found they have perhaps some strange turn-on now they are a bit older? I would love to hear from you if you have, Dougie.

Like many, others here I have had an interest in some form of Cross Dressing since I was 10 or so. I did experiment in trying on different pieces of women’s clothing and I enjoyed the feeling of the material on my very young hairless body. Being one, of five boys, and no sisters, in my family had limited my cross dressing experiences until much later in my life. Being born in the 50’s was very challenging for a young person to learn about all life’s hidden pleasures. Many of us, growing up at that time, did not have the opportunities of today’s world with the computers and the internet.

I remember looking through, my grandparent’s, “National Geography’s,” they often had many picture of naked human form. I soon found myself seeking out other forms of the human body that I could maybe identify myself. At the time, some of the neighborhood kids and I were sharing discarded or stolen magazines, tattered and puckered from many of us viewing it’s content. Those magazines or select pages of magazines had displayed the naked human form, mostly the naked female form with nice breast. They were our masturbatory treasures and we all cherished our discoveries. Many of them also displayed the naked male form but we did not believe at the time they were important, except many of us did check out the male members as a comparison to our own developing manhood.

As I got older and bolder, I had no shame of the nude body and unequivocally, that pornography played a major role in shaping my identity. I wanted to experience most anything, which involved life hidden secrets. As I continued, my journey of growing up I was gaining a better at understanding, of the new things, that I liked to see and what got me off. I noticed the male models in the, photosets, more and more. I was often taking notice of their bodies and their interaction with the female models. I was definitely looking right at their cocks. I had previously been fixated on just the sex the two were having, but now I was starting to look at both the women and the men.

My first memory of an encounter with another boy or boys was when I was 11 or 12 years old. Several of my, then best friends, all within a few years of each other, and all were neighbor kids "dared" each other to show our cocks. We were standing inside of someone’s garage. Now this was a big old garage with dirt floor and no electricity, so no lights. I believe that the doors were, closed with little slivers of light shining through the cracks. There was no touching but I do remember what an exciting feeling it was to expose my cock and equally exciting to see someone else’s hard cock. Soon after we exposed our cocks, most of us got an instance hard on. There we were, our little short thin, hairless cocks! What a site. After we all looked over each other’s cocks, some of the boys, started stroking their cocks, which I though was odd. See all I knew was to hold on to it, while I was pee, this was something new and you know that it felt good. As we all, stood there in the near darkness, stroking our tiny cocks, someone said that something wet just landed on them, and wanted to know who was peeing. One of the older boys said after a few minutes of shaking and talking funny that it was not pee. He said that he had just cum, and some of us had a puzzled look on our faces. He then explained that once you stroked it for a while you would cum and that it felt great. Soon several of us kept stroking our tiny cocks and a few others were able to shoot their load also, but not me. I shared some of the same feelings as some of the others, but nothing came out. It was then explained that soon I would be able to cum also as I got older and developed a little more. From that day on, I was practicing a lot and soon my cock became my best, friend as it has been all my life. I had now discovered the joy of masturbation and the exciting feeling of reaching a strong climax that made my body shiver with pure innocent pleasure.
My first male sexual encounter was around 15 or so, I was working at a neighborhood grocery store. One day I was, approached, by an older, man that came, in the store, a lot, and lived just up the street. He was many years my senior. He had asked if I could stop by and help him move some furniture around and since it was on my way home, I responded OK. Once that I was there I had found out what he really wanted to do as he as he started asking some personal questions about sex and my sexual experiences. Before long, he started touching me in places that I had done only in private. Now here I was a young man with a quest for knowledge about sex and the stirring feelings of my body and here was an adult that was willing to teach me a few things. You also must remember that back then, there was no internet or computers and sex was very confusing to say the lease. Most often it was the hot topic among my other male friends and most of them knew less than I did. It was very hard to get someone to explain and let alone get answers, especially from someone who knew the answers and I had wanted to learn. I had decided to let this Old Man teach me a few things. I still had no concept of bisexual tendencies or feelings, those realizations came many years later.

I drafted into the US Army and had my basic training at Fort Leonard Wood, Mo. After I served my required time and after two years, I was, honorably discharged and later released. Later that year I was married, and then divorced after thirteen years. I soon married again to, a wonderful women and sex was great together. Several years later my wife had loss several of her imitate family members and she focused on her time on her daughters and our grandchildren. Soon sex became just an old memory. I then started remembering my early years of my love to cross dress and my male sexual experiences. I had now decided that I really needed to explore this side of me completely and fully. To no longer, deny it, but rather to embrace it. I went shopping. I bought several lace undergarments and some thigh high hose and soon a pair of low heels. I went home and shaved my whole body closely. I put on my thigh hose and the undergarments. Lastly, I slipped into the heels.

Now that I am a bit older, maybe I do, perhaps some strange turn-on that I may of never had never considered before, such as, myself being bisexual. The thought of having sex with another male seemed to interested me as something that I would really enjoy now.

There is just something, amazing about cross-dressing that is, just impossible to understand unless you are a cross dresser yourself. Personally, if I had my way, I would, wear skirts and dresses all the time out in public, they are so amazing. I am not exactly sure what it is but it just feels so relaxing and occasionally very sexy to get dressed up every now and then. Perhaps I am slightly transgendered but I only feel 'feminine' occasionally I mean it is likely that I am at least slightly transgendered as I have had thoughts of cross-dressing, since I was 10 or so.

Now that I am in my fifty’s I have determined that my own preference is to be with, guys who also keep their bodies shaved smooth and who, also wear lingerie. We can model our fem things for each other and enjoy the feeling of soft material that is surrounding our smoothed shaved bodies. I have been cross-dressing for many years now and I have found that there many men, out there who enjoy others who do dressed fem for them. I love thigh high hose with heels best for myself. I sometimes crave a woman’s approval and even enjoy another man’s approval of my wearing. I still like wearing short dresses and heels with my hose but mainly wear hose with my, guy clothes.