wanna Good Laugh ?

[Jazminedress]

So, this guy has been hitting me up on grindr for about a year now. At the beginning it was the standard stuff that many guys think will get a CD turned on and wanting to worship their cock. Yeah, I do get guys that truly believe allowing me to service their tool is a blessing for me and I should probably worship them for that privilige.

We chatted some but, his personality really did not overly excite me, and timing sucked. One oft he questions I always ask, is size of the hammer...........and lets be honest, most guys brag, so he told me 8 inches and thick.

Well, I prefer 3.5 to 4.5 and normal, otherwise sex turns into work, and I want play.

So finally, last night, I had nothing better to do and said yeah, come on over, oral only , with reciprocation.

He shows up in tighty whiteys..................guys, I dont think in any world that is a turn on anymore.

Tells me he is going to show me his huge cock, it was about 4 inches, which I like, but that is not huge, that is good size.

He leaned in kissing my neck, I went down for a quick lick, grabbed him , 1 stroke, and I had a ton of cum in my hair

And that was my entire sexual episode last night, about 98 maybe 99 seconds

I went to bed and watched star trek voyager

[KDaddy23]

I didn't know 4" was the new big dick! Guys who talk shit like that should learn not to when they cum in less that two minutes... and you didn't even get to suck him?

[csreef]

I think watching Star Trek Voyager was possibly the best part of your evening. . . .

[Jazminedress]

I didn't know 4" was the new big dick! Guys who talk shit like that should learn not to when they cum in less that two minutes... and you didn't even get to suck him?

Nope, and I sure as hell ddint get any

[Jazminedress]

I think watching Star Trek Voyager was possibly the best part of your evening. . . .

I went back, and started watching every star trek series and movies in order

[Lucky 61]

I'm sorry for laughing at this... LoL

At least take some satisfaction from having got this guy that worked up with just anticipation.

[Neonaught]

I went back, and started watching every star trek series and movies in order

Trekkies of the world must unite to battle the 4" cocks out there! And we thought the Klingons were bad! LOL

[chongster]

I'm surprised he even showed up after lying about it

[Jazminedress]

I'm sorry for laughing at this... LoL

At least take some satisfaction from having got this guy that worked up with just anticipation.

I thought it was funny, I share these things so others realize, we all go through sillyness, its only sex, may as well have a good laugh

[Jazminedress]

Trekkies of the world must unite to battle the 4" cocks out there! And we thought the Klingons were bad! LOL

If there is anyting clinging on.......I leave

[bikeracer13]

hey Jaz, guess he wont be bothering you anymore.

[csreef]

Trekkies of the world must unite to battle the 4" cocks out there! And we thought the Klingons were bad! LOL


Oh god, too funny!

[ImBiVersatile]

I think a lot of the problem is people don't know how to properly measure.
Erect from the pubic bone to the tip on top. Any other way adds false inches.
I to am getting back into Star Trek. Discovered that "Discovery" is actually a decent series.

[Montesa]

Ha! That is funny...:)

[Montesa]

Damn it! And all these years I've been measuring from my butt hole to the tip in order t get 6 inches.:yikes2:

[BackyardShaman]

Wow yeah a great laugh! Metric Dick!

[Long Duck Dong]

I have heard the saying of being there for a good time, not a long time....... but.... ahhh... 99 seconds?

I have known guys to cum fast, and are good to go for a second time, but I can not honestly say that if they came in my hair the first time, that they would be getting the chance to cum again, or come again

[Fiddlestyx]

Sounds like he measured from his bung hole around the long way...:rolleyes: Nothing wrong with 4", but not when advertised as "8 inches and thick".

[Bi-Rõnin]

Thats hilarious and sad at the same time.
Smart as a horse. Hung like Einstein.

[jjourneyman]

Too funny! I think I met that guy once. Only he did tell me up front he was a quick cummer. I just didn't realize how quick was quick! Four inches sounds about right too.

I'm seven, maybe 7.5 on a good day. I know the difference.

[gooniegoogoo]

So, this guy has been hitting me up on grindr for about a year now. At the beginning it was the standard stuff that many guys think will get a CD turned on and wanting to worship their cock. Yeah, I do get guys that truly believe allowing me to service their tool is a blessing for me and I should probably worship them for that privilige.

We chatted some but, his personality really did not overly excite me, and timing sucked. One oft he questions I always ask, is size of the hammer...........and lets be honest, most guys brag, so he told me 8 inches and thick.

Well, I prefer 3.5 to 4.5 and normal, otherwise sex turns into work, and I want play.

So finally, last night, I had nothing better to do and said yeah, come on over, oral only , with reciprocation.

He shows up in tighty whiteys..................guys, I dont think in any world that is a turn on anymore.

Tells me he is going to show me his huge cock, it was about 4 inches, which I like, but that is not huge, that is good size.

He leaned in kissing my neck, I went down for a quick lick, grabbed him , 1 stroke, and I had a ton of cum in my hair

And that was my entire sexual episode last night, about 98 maybe 99 seconds

I went to bed and watched star trek voyager

Should have dated me instead. It wouldn't be in your hair.

[gooniegoogoo]

Too funny! I think I met that guy once. Only he did tell me up front he was a quick cummer. I just didn't realize how quick was quick! Four inches sounds about right too.

I'm seven, maybe 7.5 on a good day. I know the difference.

Ever heard of the 2 live crew?

[IncuBI slut]

I once spread my ass as a pity-fuck for this older gentlemen who was maybe 3.5 to 4 inches at best and average girth.

Clearly from the get go, he was used to getting rejected and he had danced around the question of cock size while we were negotiating things and claimed not to have a good pic (ah, the days of Craigslist hook ups).

Felt bad for the guy, so I figured "why not"?

Figured out a position to accommodate him, gave him a decent show of enthusiasm, and I was able to get him off twice.

The fucking didn't do a lot for me physically, but the slutty side of my mind wrote it off as a good deed while I jumped back on Craigslist and set up another hook up.

Smaller cocks need attention too, and really they can still be fun to play with as long as they guy attached to it isn't a whiner or insecure about it.

[Jazminedress]

Should have dated me instead. It wouldn't be in your hair.

thats good, I had to take another shower

[Jazminedress]

I once spread my ass as a pity-fuck for this older gentlemen who was maybe 3.5 to 4 inches at best and average girth.

Clearly from the get go, he was used to getting rejected and he had danced around the question of cock size while we were negotiating things and claimed not to have a good pic (ah, the days of Craigslist hook ups).

Felt bad for the guy, so I figured "why not"?

Figured out a position to accommodate him, gave him a decent show of enthusiasm, and I was able to get him off twice.

The fucking didn't do a lot for me physically, but the slutty side of my mind wrote it off as a good deed while I jumped back on Craigslist and set up another hook up.

Smaller cocks need attention too, and really they can still be fun to play with as long as they guy attached to it isn't a whiner or insecure about it.

In general I prefer them

[DD788Snipe]

Thanks Jaz. That made the end of my weekend rotflmao.

[Robtiti]

LOL! Hilarious.