Why are there so many bottoms? Especially in the 50+ age group

[ajr12002]

As I search multiple sites, it seems that there are many more bottoms than tops? Curious why. Would love to hear peoples thoughts. Thanks

[stonebow]

Well...considering that experiencing a cock...in one's mouth or ass is the fundamental characteristic of male to male sex.....what other reason is there to have sex with men? I mean I've topped also and enjoyed it, but I find fucking a guy's ass is not so very different from fucking a pussy. It's still my cock that's the point of contact and receives the stimulation. Sucking a cock is something a woman can't provide. And while I've not yet been pegged by a woman, I know it wouldn't feel quite the same as a real cock.

I think a better question is why do some guys ONLY want to top? Are they attracted to guys but in deep denial of their feelings and topping allows them to preserve their sense of masculinity? Is it a dominance thing....that they're either the 'top' dog or the bitch? I'm not sure what goes on in their heads but I do know when you find a good one they're worth holding on to.

[BiGuyinMA]

but I do know when you find a good one they're worth holding on to.

Amen to that Brother!
:-)

[KDaddy23]

Some guys "realize and understand" that if they're into men, being a bottom is what they are. Some guys who may be suffering the onset of ED, well, maybe they think that if their dick ain't working right, being a top is off the table... but you don't have to have a "working dick" to be a bottom. I again mention the 60+ year old guy I met online a long time ago now who told me that he was a bottom because he had developed severe ED and had his prostate removed because of cancer. He said that his dick didn't work... but his mouth and his ass were still working very well so that wasn't a reason for him to stop being able to enjoy men.

My protege often mentions this to me and that he feels like a "valuable commodity" because he sees more bottoms than tops on all the apps he uses - and his current FWB lover is quite the bottom, as I've been hearing, and this guy is over 50. He's into guys over 50 and if 10 guys check him out, 9 of them are bottoms. Is there a reason for this... disparity? I dunno. It's not that big of a stretch to "assume" that a guy in his 50s gets a taste of dick and gets very hooked on being a cocksucker only but then, perhaps, includes being fucked by the men he sucks... because it's comfortable as far as his sensibilities go. Maybe. I've not "figured this one out" yet. Maybe these guys are very much in touch with their inner girl? I've been with bottoms who have told me that it's a great change of pace being a bottom and more so when they've spent most of their life being a top to women and, well, it made them want to be a bottom. Hopefully, our resident bottoms here will chime in and speak to this.

[Tight1-4u]

ok well I can only speak for my self but here goes: when I got started 40 some odd years ago there were way more tops than bottoms like 5 to 1 being bottom was easier as everyone seemed to be tops..
the very first experience I had with m2m was me getting fucked it was just what happened.. I enjoyed it very much and kept at it.. then a few years latter when I was a full time tranny and on hormones I was a female.. pleasing men was all I was about.. being submissive and female.. then when I got off hormones and transitioning back to male I realized that my cock had shrunk and I no longer got fully erect that I am complete bottom.. I love being bottom.. I love sex with men.. I love feeling their cock in my pussy.. I love feeling their cock stirring up my insides.. I love that I a man can and do do the things that makes another man sexually eroticly crazy!! They are so turned on that their primal instinct takes over and all they want to do is fuck me and give me their dna.. they are really trying to make me pregnant.. I love feeling them cum deep in my pussy!! I love that they are so turned on that they loose control and fuck me like I am a female!!

[tongueteaser]

My self I have always liked using my mouth and tongue to stimulate a woman. Being older and experiencing alot with woman Ii wanted to try a guys cock. First of all being a guy I know what feels good on a cock and the do,s and donts. Many past girlfriends were plain to rough and aggressive on my cock and ruin it for me. I believe in very wet and slow and teasing and sucking the head a bit and so forth. Many woman go too fast forward and use their hands to jerk and twist and all and dont feel good to me. I wanted to prove that I myself could make a guys head relax and make his cock throb. Also having my mouth full of hot horniness and getting cum for good work. Receiving head or fucking a guys ass is just not for me. I want to be sucking the cock like a slut and hopefully one day have my tight ass taken

[cornholejoe]

i can and do top but i love to bottom and its mostly married men who fucking me in the ass because their wife wont

[Fzmr9t]

I?ve topped and enjoyed it but some guys are into HUGE members and an average or smaller then average unit just doesn?t do it for them, so instead of disappointing someone, I?d rather give my ALL with my mouth and my ass. And now that I?m in my 60s and ED is an issue oral and anal are my way of pleasuring my partner

[NJwood]

I would be described as a bottom because I want to suck or get fucked. I have a problem with the inference of submissiveness. As mentioned, topping seems to be the opposite and suggests the desire to dominate. I always clarify, that I’m not submissive to a wood getting into a situation where my partner in a hook up tries to get assertive or domineering. It happened once and became a bit of a power struggle. Fortunately, I was the stronger of us and able to extract myself.
That said, I am also looking for other avenues of stimulation where it’s not all about my cock. I love oral sex with a woman and extend that same feeling of pleasure when I’m going down on a guy. Getting fucked is just a whole new dimension.

[KDaddy23]

Tight1-4U is right. For me and 50 years ago, there were more tops than bottoms. Few guys wanted to "be the girl" and get into sucking dick and being fucked but if ya wanted to "be the girl," you'd be in heaven, but I'll say that outside of gay men, there weren't that many guys who were totally into being a bottom and as we understand it today. It is to note that, fifty years ago, a lot of bottoms were effeminate gay men and, again, they reveled in the fact that there was a glut of tops out there but now? Hmm.

[ajr12002]

Great feedback! I was expecting someone would say ED. Wonder if it is because of a lack of passion in a guys life too?

[Jozyxt]

I have several thoughts, none of which could really be considered a reason. But just observations.

You can bottom every day. Even multiple times a day. You can also suck many cocks in a day. I am good for actually cumming form a BJ once or twice a week with men. So with older men at least, if you want to maintain a high level of sexual contact, you need to bottom.

I will add also, thea many older men I have met take pride in good technique. Just as I take pride in technique with my wife. Men can get great pleasure and satisfaction from giving another a good orgasm. So naturally, that translates into more bottoms among older men.

My reading suggests that on average wives don't particularly care to be the top. So men that want some bottom time won't get it from their wife. So they seek it from other men.

[Neonaught]

Everyone has their tastes and I've never seen being a top as some kind of denial of the fem aspects of bottoming. I'm a top. I have bottomed and now to do regularly with a special guy among my regulars. He gets nothing at home so after years of me just topping I agreed to flip fuck with him. Frankly, bottoming does nothing for me sexually as much as topping does. I just enjoy the pleasure I am gifting him by letting him fuck me. Perhaps there are some men who have a psychological basis for being tops but I am not among them in my opinion.

[dowmass]

Does bottoming involve less physical effort and strain
as compared to a TOP?

Just asking as I have never topped.

[Footstep40]

I feel in the mid 90’s there was a good ratio of tops, I usually never had a problem finding many in my slut phase.
I tried topping my first time I was ever with a guy, he was not a fan as it was his first time with a guy as well, so we switched up. Once I got past the initial pain, I was in heaven and knew that oh yeah…this was definitely for me, and topping was certainly for him, he’s still a top. That was such a fun summer after high school.

[stonebow]

Some guys "realize and understand" that if they're into men, being a bottom is what they are. Some guys who may be suffering the onset of ED, well, maybe they think that if their dick ain't working right, being a top is off the table... but you don't have to have a "working dick" to be a bottom. I again mention the 60+ year old guy I met online a long time ago now who told me that he was a bottom because he had developed severe ED and had his prostate removed because of cancer. He said that his dick didn't work... but his mouth and his ass were still working very well so that wasn't a reason for him to stop being able to enjoy men.

My protege often mentions this to me and that he feels like a "valuable commodity" because he sees more bottoms than tops on all the apps he uses - and his current FWB lover is quite the bottom, as I've been hearing, and this guy is over 50. He's into guys over 50 and if 10 guys check him out, 9 of them are bottoms. Is there a reason for this... disparity? I dunno. It's not that big of a stretch to "assume" that a guy in his 50s gets a taste of dick and gets very hooked on being a cocksucker only but then, perhaps, includes being fucked by the men he sucks... because it's comfortable as far as his sensibilities go. Maybe. I've not "figured this one out" yet. Maybe these guys are very much in touch with their inner girl? I've been with bottoms who have told me that it's a great change of pace being a bottom and more so when they've spent most of their life being a top to women and, well, it made them want to be a bottom. Hopefully, our resident bottoms here will chime in and speak to this.

"Change of pace"...is certainly one aspect of it. I love to fuck and eat my lady's pussy, but if I'm being honest....it does sometimes feel like a bit of a responsibility. When I lie back and let a man penetrate me, there's zero pressure. I mean sure, I'm eager to please him, but 90% of the effort is his. I have only to be receptive and enthusiastic....which, with the right guy, is not at all difficult.

[ImBiVersatile]

I can't say why there are so many bottoms and so few tops
Me personally i like to do both. I absolutely love it when i can find a guy not in a hurry and we can take a little time mutually sucking and we can switch fucking each other before either cums. Been a couple of years sense i have even had the chance to get together with another guy i have almost forgotten what its like.

[stonebow]

Does bottoming involve less physical effort and strain
as compared to a TOP?

Just asking as I have never topped.

Much depends on the position(s) in which the top likes to take you. Some can be physically demanding but others... cowboy, for example, are a lot less taxing.

[Tight1-4u]

as stated before I can only speak for myself so I am going to try and explain some psychology insight as to why I am a sub bottom guy.. as I have stated before my very first sexual experience was m2m.. I enjoyed the experience and came to want and need to be fucked over that summer.. it was purely sexual and me servicing those 4 guys.. move on to high school.. football coach fucked me most every day for almost 2 years.. but I also during that time had my first experience with girls.. as I have explained coaches wife and the girls she turned on to me.. fast forward to my early 20?s.. some how I got it in my head that I was female stuck in a guys body.. I convinced the dr.?s and got on hormones and started transitioning to female.. my skin softened my tits grew a lot!! The hair on my body softened and most of it was removed.. my voice changed.. my cock went from 8? erect to 3 1/2-4?!!! My mindset was gay female.. I was only interested in men.. all I wanted was to be naked and have some guy with his cock in my pussy.. I loved sex being fucked.. I still do but then it was all I thought about.. for 8 1/2 years I was tranny female.. then I got off hormones and for about 2 years transitioned back to male.. my voice changed back my tits shrank some.. my hair came back but my cock is still about the same but never really gets fully erect.. I still love sex with men.. I still love being fucked by men.. when I am having sex with men there is still part of me that feels very female.. I love being sub.. I love being with semi aggressive men, take charge men, be in control men, take what they want ( sexually ) men!!! I love being that guy that has done all the things to and for another guy that has him so sexually worked up that he has his cock deep in my pussy grunting and groaning thrusting himself as deep into my pussy as he can.. his primal instinct has taken over and his mind is sexually blurred and all he wants is to fuck me very well and deep.. he wants and needs to plant his seed in me, he is trying to make me pregnant.. his primal instinct to breed and spread his seed is overwhelming him to overlook the fact that he is fucking me another guy!! The desire to impregnate me is powerful.. likewise I loose all control and need for him to fuck me and impregnate me with his cum!!!!!
I about 10 years ago found my niche.. sexually Frustrated married men.. men who are in a sexless marriage or are not getting at home what they want or need.. enter me.. the guy that looks forward to seeing them.. the person that wants to be naked with them.. the person that wants them to fuck them., wants all their cum inside of them., married men are different.. they know what they want.. they have time issues so they are willing to get right down to it., they are clean..
I love sex with men.. I love feeling the head of his cock find my pussy hole.. I love feeling him pushing himself in to me.. I love feeling him fully in me balls deep.. I love feeling his cock stirring my insides up.. I love feeling his cock swell up as he is getting ready to fill me with his seed.. I love feeling him cumming deep inside me filling me to over full.. I love last but not least that empty feeling I get deep inside when he falls out of me.. knowing he left his dna as my gift from him..
that is why I am sub bottom guy.. I love it so!!

[KDaddy23]

I also think that some bottoms - of any age - find their niche once they get past that first time being fucked. It just clicks for them. Methinks the 50+ guys are... less fussy about it? Been through some shit in their life that was a whole lot scarier than being fucked? But then you have guys like me who have been bisexual for many decades and have been fucked and to be a bottom - or to bottom - at this age is... no big deal. Been there. Done that. More times than we can remember. I know of one guy who said, "Life's really too short not to do the things you probably should have done when you were younger..." and he was a bottom because he said he had always wanted a guy to fuck him but didn't get around to it until he hit 50.

[MidTownBob]

Others have summarized nicely the impact that ED has when one becomes older. It’s certainly true in my case. That being said, with my personality type I find that I thoroughly enjoy bringing pleasure to other men which I find an effective substitute for the loss of my ability to top. Sure, I occasionally wish that I could still do it but, in general, I’m able to be satisfied with my current circumstances.

[int0everything]

Does bottoming involve less physical effort and strain
as compared to a TOP?

Just asking as I have never topped.

You have to really focus on relaxing your muscles and taking it slow till your body adjusts. My guy likes to change up positions so that takes a toll to trying to stay in position and relax at the same time. I almost think topping would be easier.

[KDaddy23]

I think tops have it "harder" because there's that pressure to perform laid on them and none of us ever want to be told that we can't fuck or we didn't fuck someone right and all that. How hard is it to lube your dick and his hole and get it in him? Not that difficult but there's some learning in this but now the top is under pressure because once he gets it in, well, he'd better make it good for us and if he doesn't, he will not be invited for a second change to do it to us good and all that.

It's not so much the act itself but the pressure a guy can feel - real or imagined - that can make being a top harder than being a bottom and the hardest part about being a bottom is learning how to take a hard dick in the ass and being comfortable in the various positions one could find themselves in.

[Warmnsalty]

My theory has always been that bi guys top all the time with women, with a guy they want to bottom. That's my deal anyway. I have always loved pussy, love eating it and fucking it. I started bi in my late 20's for the longest time it was confined to oral. I'm also not at all turned on my hairy guys, so the idea of a hairy guy ass wasn't and isn't a turn on. The first time I did anal I was the top, It was fun, but actually liked fucking pussy better. When I tried to bottom it was painful but I liked the submissive part. So I started using toys to practice and get better at taking dick. Pretty much all bottom for the next 20+ years. Topped for the first time in a long time a few months ago and liked it, so now more open to topping. Still requires nice smooth, or nearly smooth ass.

[KDaddy23]

Warmnsalty said, "My theory has always been that bi guys top all the time with women, with a guy they want to bottom..."

This is what a lot of bottoms have told me. When I first heard this, I thought it didn't make sense but the more the guy I was talking to - and was going to top - talked about this, the more sense it made. He said, "You just get tired being the one to do all of the work and trying to make women happy! This gives me a chance for someone to make me happy, okay?" I don't remember whether I actually did make him happy but he was very relaxed the whole time and when I came in him, I did hear him sigh. I've heard enough bottoms tell me this that it stopped being a theory for me where this particular reason is concerned.

[seniorsucker]

You've made some good points. I, for example, sometimes have a really difficult time cumming. Most bottoms don't want to suck your dick for 30 min to make you cum. That's probably the reason I'm a versatile/bottom. Truth be told, I do prefer to suck than to be sucked. But I'd never deprive anyone of enjoying it as well.

[jjourneyman]

Well...considering that experiencing a cock...in one's mouth or ass is the fundamental characteristic of male to male sex.....what other reason is there to have sex with men? I mean I've topped also and enjoyed it, but I find fucking a guy's ass is not so very different from fucking a pussy. It's still my cock that's the point of contact and receives the stimulation. Sucking a cock is something a woman can't provide. And while I've not yet been pegged by a woman, I know it wouldn't feel quite the same as a real cock.

I think a better question is why do some guys ONLY want to top? Are they attracted to guys but in deep denial of their feelings and topping allows them to preserve their sense of masculinity? Is it a dominance thing....that they're either the 'top' dog or the bitch? I'm not sure what goes on in their heads but I do know when you find a good one they're worth holding on to.

I can't speak for everyone, but in terms of MM sex, I think most guys started out as bottoms and have, over the years, wanted to return the favor and are now tops.

[friesbaconnekkid]

I wish there were more tops in my area. I'm 68, and suspect local tops are looking for younger guys to fuck. I welcome any cocks in my ass, regardless of if they are experienced, or a first timer.
Some may not think I'm a good fuck, as I go totally limp when a cock is in my ass and they have to do all the work. Most are just happy to have an ass to put their cocks in.

[jjourneyman]

Does bottoming involve less physical effort and strain
as compared to a TOP?

Just asking as I have never topped.

Hi downmass, Yes, topping does require more physical effort as it's up to him to get hard and stay hard. I've been with a couple of tops who could get hard in my mouth, but not stay hard during intercourse. I've also been with a few guys who couldn't cum from a bj, but had no problem cumming inside my ass. I think it just depends on the person and where their head is at any momement.

[SilkyHoseLover]

<snip> I think most guys started out as bottoms and have, over the years, wanted to return the favor and are now tops. I think there's some validity to this, although it didn't happen in my situation, due to circumstances. I fully agree that there can be a strong desire to, as you say, 'return the favor' and top.

I was very cautious at first in trying to accurately depict how I'd act during early encounters. I was all-in for giving and receiving oral, and curious/interested in receiving anal. As one who assumed himself to be straight for most of his life to that point, I logically expected that I'd not be able to achieve the necessary state of arousal to penetrate another man's anus. My age and physical condition were also factors, as they were both on the decline. I could still 'get it up' but it sure wasn't what it used to be, even with my wife. So I felt that I was destined to be a bottom, and was just fine with that, whenever the subject came up.

A few years down the road, and my attitude has changed, but the physical realities have not. I'm pleased that I can still get reasonably hard and enlarged, because so many who are interested in playing with me love to give oral as well as receive, and I'm happy to accommodate. And there are also some who would love to feel me in their asses. It's simply not going to happen - I can't get hard enough for penetrating a tight ass, not even my wife's.

I'm all about sexually satisfying a partner, and would willingly do it if I could in an anal reciprocal situation, but I'm afraid that's doomed to failure, now mainly because of waning ability, not because of lack of desire.

[Warren63]

I want to be maybe submissive to a mature guy with a nice cock, plus my wife would like to see me used by a guy

[Hector]

Well consider this possibility,

In my case, I love to top; I like the feeling of inserting my cock in someone else ass.

But, lately, most of my anal sex; I’m the bottom. I had found difficult to keep a lasting erection specially while wearing a condom. Also, the distraction in trying to put and keep the condom it is also a problem. Otherwise, I would top.

Weeks ago, I asked my doctor to prescribe me Viagra and he suggested me Cialis for having the attribute to last longer. I was surprise to see that the pills were so small and I have my doubt that this can do anything. I took one pill to try and see and I waited the two suggested hours. Then I watch some porno videos to get arouse, and like always, I got an erection. But, this time it was extreme hard and I was so excited to see that I was able to keep it even without watching the video and touching myself.

[ajr12002]

Well consider this possibility,

In my case, I love to top; I like the feeling of inserting my cock in someone else ass.

But, lately, most of my anal sex; I’m the bottom. I had found difficult to keep a lasting erection specially while wearing a condom. Also, the distraction in trying to put and keep the condom it is also a problem. Otherwise, I would top.

Weeks ago, I asked my doctor to prescribe me Viagra and he suggested me Cialis for having the attribute to last longer. I was surprise to see that the pills were so small and I have my doubt that this can do anything. I took one pill to try and see and I waited the two suggested hours. Then I watch some porno videos to get arouse, and like always, I got an erection. But, this time it was extreme hard and I was so excited to see that I was able to keep it even without watching the video and touching myself. That’s awesome! Congratulations.