What Is Too Safe?

[Findingmyway]

My wife and I have been very fortunate we sort of tripped over a couple of very nice, clean and healthy people to include in our sex life, one male and one female. Thing is, we are very picky about bringing other people in and because of that, I haven't had sex with another guy for a couple of months now and frankly, I miss my bi side even though my wife makes up for it with her strapon we both know it's not the real thing and she can't cum for me.

In this day and age, pandemics, STD's and the like we wonder if we are too careful. We refuse to have people in our lives that refuse to be vaccinated and refuse to wear a mask in public. We won't search the various online services or randomly pick partners up in bars and consequently we are having a dry spell or rather I am, my wife is perfectly happy having sex with her girlfriend (although it's so far only been once) but she understands my dilemma. She knows I miss having sex with a guy and she very much misses watching and verbally encouraging me.

So, are the dangers more important than the desire to suck and fuck and be sucked and fucked by another guy? We're not sure. Should I be content to have sex with my wife and her girlfriend and their strapons, I don't know but I sure would like to couple with another guy while my wife and girlfriend watch and participate. What a dilemma:( https://cl.phncdn.com/gif/36301871.gif

[Neonaught]

My wife and I solve that problem by not picking up random people. We get to know them a bit first and show them our STD results. If They can't do the same it's "Goodbye!"

[mnjack]

Your caution is well placed. Ultimately, you and your wife are responsible for your health and being selective in your partner selection is key. This may result in it taking what seems like forever to find a compatible male but, unfortunately, that is life.

[tenni]

I agree that this is not the era of random sex with strangers.

Where I live guys are posting under their self description on such sites as the squirt website, guys are reporting that they have had two doses of the vaccine for Codvid. Better safe than dead or suffer post Covid organ damage etc.

[Findingmyway]

Glad to see we are not alone. It's a challenge for sure but when all is said and done, well worth the effort we think.

[Jazminedress]

I wont get into the whole vaccine topic, as just like religon, neitehr side will agree and why go into the headaches.

My concerns are Hepatitis, STD's (Especially HIV) and violence more than anything. I generally do not do, buy me a drink and bang me, just not my scene. For those that are happy with that, I don't judge, you do you, I will do me and we all be happy at the end of the day

But, until I really know someone, I mean really know, I think the best protection is a condom (for the record, I always place it on. I have seen them break because people place them too tight). When it was with a couple, I knew it was only the three of us, so we were good. The guy I have been seeing has been an extended time, he is not out running around, so we are good.

Someone I know a few weeks, that, could be out cruising parks at night, its wrap it up period. Locally, we have a large population of people who, well, did not come here legally and we have constant hepatitis outbreaks, so that always makes me nervous more than anything. I read an article recently that 1 in 4 gay men are carrying HIV. I was surprised as I thought, didn't the 80's scare us enough ?

It seems, according to the article, the younger generation views it as an old gay guys disease (not agreeing or disagreeing, it was what the article said). Which I can kind of see, it snot in our faces like it was when I was young, and with all the PREP and everything you don't hear as much on the news

Then of course there is violence. While I know you were directing it at disease, you should also think about that. You are putting your wife around someone who could be bat shit crazy, a violent jerk, someone into bDSM who reads you wrong, many many things. I have all my little tricks to protect myself on that front, mostly to stop a chance of violence before it can escalate ( like at a hotel, I make up a stupid reason we need to go to the front desk on the way up, this way the person knows they were seen with me, and generally on camera), get a ;picture of a li cense plate etc etc etc

Truthfully, I am probably more of a target than a nice couple.......................but, there is not such thing as too safe when it comes to you and your familt

[Findingmyway]

I wont get into the whole vaccine topic, as just like religon, neitehr side will agree and why go into the headaches.

My concerns are Hepatitis, STD's (Especially HIV) and violence more than anything. I generally do not do, buy me a drink and bang me, just not my scene. For those that are happy with that, I don't judge, you do you, I will do me and we all be happy at the end of the day

But, until I really know someone, I mean really know, I think the best protection is a condom (for the record, I always place it on. I have seen them break because people place them too tight). When it was with a couple, I knew it was only the three of us, so we were good. The guy I have been seeing has been an extended time, he is not out running around, so we are good.

Someone I know a few weeks, that, could be out cruising parks at night, its wrap it up period. Locally, we have a large population of people who, well, did not come here legally and we have constant hepatitis outbreaks, so that always makes me nervous more than anything. I read an article recently that 1 in 4 gay men are carrying HIV. I was surprised as I thought, didn't the 80's scare us enough ?

It seems, according to the article, the younger generation views it as an old gay guys disease (not agreeing or disagreeing, it was what the article said). Which I can kind of see, it snot in our faces like it was when I was young, and with all the PREP and everything you don't hear as much on the news

Then of course there is violence. While I know you were directing it at disease, you should also think about that. You are putting your wife around someone who could be bat shit crazy, a violent jerk, someone into bDSM who reads you wrong, many many things. I have all my little tricks to protect myself on that front, mostly to stop a chance of violence before it can escalate ( like at a hotel, I make up a stupid reason we need to go to the front desk on the way up, this way the person knows they were seen with me, and generally on camera), get a ;picture of a li cense plate etc etc etc

Truthfully, I am probably more of a target than a nice couple.......................but, there is not such thing as too safe when it comes to you and your familt

As is usully the case Jazmine, your reply is spot on. We had thought bout the violent types as well and that is a scary prospect. For now as much as I miss having sex with another guy, we'll err on the side of safety. I see a lot of guys I'd think I'd like to have sex with and my wife and now Kathy notice me checking guys out but we know to be careful.

[Jazminedress]

As is usully the case Jazmine, your reply is spot on. We had thought bout the violent types as well and that is a scary prospect. For now as much as I miss having sex with another guy, we'll err on the side of safety. I see a lot of guys I'd think I'd like to have sex with and my wife and now Kathy notice me checking guys out but we know to be careful.

Honestly I trust women, they seem to have a natural born ability to read dangers more than men, who knows, maybe an evolutionary thing

[Findingmyway]

Honestly I trust women, they seem to have a natural born ability to read dangers more than men, who knows, maybe an evolutionary thing

Probably so Jazmine. My wife did pick the right guy from the start. We were talking about the possibility of asking him to join us again, don't know if he will but we know he's safe and we know he was a good fit...pun intended;)

[KDaddy23]

Being too safe makes sure that whatever you wanna do ain't gonna happen. Be smart about it; pick someone and vet them right down to the nitty-gritty; insist on them being tested and show you the results and if you're concerned about COVID, they gotta show you their vaccination card; telling you about them ain't gonna cut it. Insist on full disclosure because the mistake some people make is assuming that whoever they've chosen is only having sex with them and just like the same flaw in the FWB thing, the question is: How do you know where his dick has been when he's not with you? And if he's smart, he's gonna want to make sure that the two of you are safe to have sex with as well so ya might want to be prepared to prove to him that you both are.

And that's what condoms are for.

[Christopher South]

We get to know them a bit first and show them our STD results. If They can't do the same it's "Goodbye!"

Just a note on "test results". I got into a discussion with a friend over getting test results from guys we hook up with and he was insisting on them. I made my own "test results", complete with hospital logo, lots of technical jargon and all negative results. 15 minutes on my computer. Anyone with a computer can give you "test results". It's better to understand your potential partner's thinking and lifestyle.

[Neonaught]

Just a note on "test results". I got into a discussion with a friend over getting test results from guys we hook up with and he was insisting on them. I made my own "test results", complete with hospital logo, lots of technical jargon and all negative results. 15 minutes on my computer. Anyone with a computer can give you "test results". It's better to understand your potential partner's thinking and lifestyle.

I avoid this issue by using home test kits and then photographing the result laying on that days newspaper with the date highlighted.