Random hook up safety?

[CuriousSub]

For those of you who frequent saunas, adult theatres and cruise areas, how do you gauge whether you should play or pass?

Has anyone here contracted an STD or other health issue because of playing with strangers? (Please be honest)

[CuriousSub]

Nobody?

or has this been covered too many times?

I’m new here

[KDaddy23]

You have to know what to look for and be able to examine and make a decision quickly. Always look for any sores, scabs, or new abrasions on the dick; give it a few pulls to see if his pre-cum is crystal clear; smell his skin and if you can, look at his eyes for any signs of excessive redness or a yellow tint. I've hooked up randomly with a lot of guys but because I bothered to find out what signs of unhealthiness can be seen, I've never caught anything... and if I have the tiniest doubt, nothing is going to happen; I'll trust my instincts before I trust anything he might say.

[Alex_rose]

Welcome, I haven't tried random hookups with men. But if I would I always wear a rubber.

[KDaddy23]

Welcome, I haven't tried random hookups with men. But if I would I always wear a rubber.

Very true... except some random hookups can happen spontaneously and who carries rubbers with them these days unless they're planning to do something "random?"

[CuriousSub]

Fear has kept me from trying it.

Fear of contracting an STD, bringing something home to my partner, fear of being outed or having my relationship ruined...or just getting the shit beat out of me (or worse)

so many risks

[CuriousSub]

You have to know what to look for and be able to examine and make a decision quickly. Always look for any sores, scabs, or new abrasions on the dick; give it a few pulls to see if his pre-cum is crystal clear; smell his skin and if you can, look at his eyes for any signs of excessive redness or a yellow tint. I've hooked up randomly with a lot of guys but because I bothered to find out what signs of unhealthiness can be seen, I've never caught anything... and if I have the tiniest doubt, nothing is going to happen; I'll trust my instincts before I trust anything he might say.

Aside from sores (GROSS), what does skin smell, pre-cum and eye issues signify?

[Jaxxx]

Random is out of the question for me and has been for a long time, both male or female. Not only is it risky health wise, but you also put yourself in a vulnerable position to be robbed, scammed or worse.

[Liberia444]

I'm also new, virgin to non-hetero. Is it too much to expect a recent STD test? I get them semi regularly except when in committed monogamous relationships. I'd definitely want my partner to have a recent test before doing pretty much anything... Is that an absurd request?

[BiGuyinMA]

Two separate issues here; there's the issue of physical safety and the issues of health.

I'm a former infantryman, I'm a guy who, despite my age, still exercises hard and can take care of myself... but an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. If something doesn't feel right trust your instincts, always err on the side of caution. There's been times when I've actually met guys only to apologize, about turn and beat a hasty retreat because something about their demeanor 'just wasn't right'. Even if you could physically get the better of an attacker, you could still get injured or the police could wind up getting involved which, if you're married and in the closet, could be disastrous!

On one occasion I met a guy at his hotel just for a mutual JO session. When I got there (Red Roof Inn, Torrington, CT, I should have known better) there was white powder and drug paraphernalia all over the room... I was out of there so fast the curtains wafted in the vacuum created by my speed out of the door. Any sign of drug activity or use, get the hell out of there... Drug use and STD's are synonymous.

Anyone posting an add on Doublelist or the like for an anonymous hotel bareback cum dump asking that "you be clean and DDF as I am" is fucking delusional/downright dangerous and should be avoided at all costs.

If I'm hosting in a hotel room I never give out my room number. I ALWAYS meet outside first. That gives me a couple of precious minutes to assess the situation.

The number of guys I host at my house when my wife is out of town I can count on 1 hand. These are all guys I've developed some kind of relationship with. NEVER give out your home address (or phone #) to a stranger. I personally know a guy who was blackmailed after replying to some adds. If you're replying to adds and chatting to guys online, get some electrical tape and cover up your web cam. Be super cautious about opening any attachments to their e-mails. Make sure your computer is FULLY backed up. If you ever fall foul of a ransomware/blackmail attempt, have the resources available to completely wipe your computer and then restore.

You can't totally eliminate all the risks associated with our lifestyle but there's a lot you can do to minimize the risks.

If you're going to meet a guy at his house, ask that he comes to the door to wave you in before you approach the house. There's an idiot round my way who's been trying to send people to unsuspecting houses. He's going to get someone seriously hurt one day.

Be super cautious and stay safe.

[dowmass]

Two separate issues here; there's the issue of physical safety and the issues of health.

I'm a former infantryman, I'm a guy who, despite my age, still exercises hard and can take care of myself... but an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. If something doesn't feel right trust your instincts, always err on the side of caution. There's been times when I've actually met guys only to apologize, about turn and beat a hasty retreat because something about their demeanor 'just wasn't right'. Even if you could physically get the better of an attacker, you could still get injured or the police could wind up getting involved which, if you're married and in the closet, could be disastrous!

On one occasion I met a guy at his hotel just for a mutual JO session. When I got there (Red Roof Inn, Torrington, CT, I should have known better) there was white powder and drug paraphernalia all over the room... I was out of there so fast the curtains wafted in the vacuum created by my speed out of the door. Any sign of drug activity or use, get the hell out of there... Drug use and STD's are synonymous.

Anyone posting an add on Doublelist or the like for an anonymous hotel bareback cum dump asking that "you be clean and DDF as I am" is fucking delusional/downright dangerous and should be avoided at all costs.

If I'm hosting in a hotel room I never give out my room number. I ALWAYS meet outside first. That gives me a couple of precious minutes to assess the situation.

The number of guys I host at my house when my wife is out of town I can count on 1 hand. These are all guys I've developed some kind of relationship with. NEVER give out your home address (or phone #) to a stranger. I personally know a guy who was blackmailed after replying to some adds. If you're replying to adds and chatting to guys online, get some electrical tape and cover up your web cam. Be super cautious about opening any attachments to their e-mails. Make sure your computer is FULLY backed up. If you ever fall foul of a ransomware/blackmail attempt, have the resources available to completely wipe your computer and then restore.

You can't totally eliminate all the risks associated with our lifestyle but there's a lot you can do to minimize the risks.

If you're going to meet a guy at his house, ask that he comes to the door to wave you in before you approach the house. There's an idiot round my way who's been trying to send people to unsuspecting houses. He's going to get someone seriously hurt one day.

Be super cautious and stay safe.

I want to thank you for this ?Guide to staying safe with strangers?. It?s so detailed, well meant, precise and written in a way that one can easily follow. Thanks again!

one thing that I wanted to add is this. I?s a good idea to meet a stranger at a public place like a coffee shop before you go to his place. In the course of 7-10 minutes, you can learn some important things like things you like and red flags (demeanor, language etc.). Those will help you decide if you want to proceedto his place or politely decline.

My own personal experience: I met a guy at a star bucks after exchanging 10-15 emails. All along i said that I wasn?t open to barebacking. At the meeting however, he said he couldn?t use condoms, because he had latex allergy. I politely declined.

Couple of piinters:

1. That face to face meeting saved me the trouble of going to his place and then declining to have sex.
2. I learnt later that there are indeed latex free condoms... something I didn?t know then.☹️

[Jozyxt]

NEVER give out your home address (or phone #) to a stranger. I personally know a guy who was blackmailed after replying to some adds.

Be super cautious and stay safe.

I had one guy social engineer me into giving him my real number, which he used to find my wife's facebook account. He threatened to message her. I told him, "So what!" The threatened to tell others, and I dropped it. So far I've heard nothing from his threats. But I will no longer ever give out anything but my VOIP number.