My Fingers Are Crossed

[JBourne]

I am cautiously optimistic. My wife and I are in the lifestyle. She's a hotwife and I watch, take pictures, and sometimes join in here and there. She knows nothing of my bi tendencies or any past bi activity. Well, I met a guy on a lifestyle site that is also bi and I'm in the process of trying to arrange a threesome with all of us. He also said that he may be interested in some MM playtime when my wife is busy. Wish me luck!

[KDaddy23]

Good luck!

[GayGuy04]

Good luck and tell us how it went between just you and the guy

[csreef]

Good luck, and tell what happened!

[DD788Snipe]

Good luck.

[monaohio]

good luck to you

[buds50]

go for it big time if she's open to the rest she may like your bi side , and clean up efforts

[JimmyPlays]

Way to go dude. I think you're doing yourself a good thing. No matter what you eventually arrive at, bi, gay, straight, curious, etc. at least you're giving all yourself an honest chance to openly experience what you want to try. I'm proud of you for being honest and letting yourself to be real. Not all guys actually do it your way. btw, if it matters to you, consider doing the mm first. and do it several times. You can always do the mmf 3-way later.

[JBourne]

Well, as it turns out there was a major development but certainly not the one I expected. I talked to the wife last night about scheduling a meeting with the new guy. She then told me that she isn't really feeling it anymore and wants to take a break from the lifestyle, maybe permanently. I asked offhandedly, "Well, can I just suck his dick then?" She replied, "Sure." We talked about it for a little while but then she said, "I hope you're not serious! That's disgusting!" We talked some more and I finally admitted that I had thought about it and it would be an understatement to say that she was not pleased. She said, as she has said in the past, that "there is no such thing as 'bi' but only gay and straight; if you're a guy and you suck another guy's dick, you're gay." We discussed it briefly but it was obvious that she was not receptive to the idea.

[JBourne]

Way to go dude. I think you're doing yourself a good thing. No matter what you eventually arrive at, bi, gay, straight, curious, etc. at least you're giving all yourself an honest chance to openly experience what you want to try. I'm proud of you for being honest and letting yourself to be real. Not all guys actually do it your way. btw, if it matters to you, consider doing the mm first. and do it several times. You can always do the mmf 3-way later.

Well, based on last night's developments, I might go ahead with the mm, because it looks like there won't be any mfm. I even asked her last night if she would be okay with me "experimenting" (she has no idea I've given head before) as long as she doesn't have to know/hear about it, and she still said, "Well, if you give a guy a blowjob, you're gay."

[KDaddy23]

You know, it never fails to amaze me to hear women who suck cock say that guys doing it is disgusting and we're gay if we do.

[marine20]

why the fuck are most wives like that ?

[JBourne]

You know, it never fails to amaze me to hear women who suck cock say that guys doing it is disgusting and we're gay if we do.
I asked her, "if I girl licks pussy, does that mean she's a lesbian?" She said, "Of course not. It's a double standard, yes, but it is what it is. If a guy does it, he's gay."

[JBourne]

why the fuck are most wives like that ?

I wish I knew...smh. My ex was open to the idea and when she masturbated in front of me she used to talk about watching me give head to another guy. For unrelated matters we ended up divorcing before it happened.

[KDaddy23]

I wish I knew...smh. My ex was open to the idea and when she masturbated in front of me she used to talk about watching me give head to another guy. For unrelated matters we ended up divorcing before it happened.

I know why...

[Oborokybiman]

Man, I hate to hear that! But you have to do what you have to do. It’s tough in a smaller town in Kentucky to find like minded men for some male bonding! I enjoy slurping this on a nice boner but afraid I’m a it of practice!

[JBourne]

I'm really torn. The wife and I talked a little more tonight and she said she was "appalled" that I would want to give head to another guy. There's never going to be any changing her mind, I can clearly see that. I can also see that bringing it up again will only serve to damage our relationship.

I really crave giving head and this guy is like a unicorn in that he wants me to be his on-call cocksucker and come over two or three times a week and use my mouth. I've fantasized about just such an arrangement for many, many years. He only lives about 20 minutes from me and has a lot of availability. I have adjustable work hours so it would work perfectly and I could meet him almost anytime while my wife is at work.

I don't want to cheat on my wife but I can't even describe how badly I want to suck this guy's dick (again and again).

[The Chunkly]

Good luck and hope it all works out.
keep us informed on how it goes.

[GayGuy04]

I'm really torn. The wife and I talked a little more tonight and she said she was "appalled" that I would want to give head to another guy. There's never going to be any changing her mind, I can clearly see that. I can also see that bringing it up again will only serve to damage our relationship.

I really crave giving head and this guy is like a unicorn in that he wants me to be his on-call cocksucker and come over two or three times a week and use my mouth. I've fantasized about just such an arrangement for many, many years. He only lives about 20 minutes from me and has a lot of availability. I have adjustable work hours so it would work perfectly and I could meet him almost anytime while my wife is at work.

I don't want to cheat on my wife but I can't even describe how badly I want to suck this guy's dick (again and again).

Good luck and hopefully your wife understands what your situation is of getting little cock from this guy who lives close to you

[Fresia]

I'm really torn.

I don't want to cheat on my wife but I can't even describe how badly I want to suck this guy's dick (again and again).


JB, you've got a fly in the ointment, haven't you?
Since you are admittedly really torn and have fantasized about this type of situation for many, many years why not consider telling your wife that this is what you want and you are going to do it without her permission or blessing? Tell her being with another man is very appealing to you and it's something that you really want to do! And since (I assume) you love her, still want to be with her and your desire to have sex with another man in no way undermines your love and desire for her then you should tell her that too! Look her in the eye and tell her what you want. You want to suck another mans cock and nothing is going to stop you!
What will she do? Will she leave you or will she decide that letting you have this thing that you really want is a minor concession?

Here is the flips side, JB. You don't tell her (that you are going after cock with or without her blessing) and you make the decision that the unicorn is yours, ok? You decide that you really want this and you go for it. You meet a few times and it's better than your fantasies! You are really glad that you decided to fulfill this desire.
Until your wife finds out.
What will she do? Will she leave you or will she decide that her broken heart, the shattered reality of who you really are and the broken-beyond-repair relationship between you is a minor concession?

In short, make sure your desire to be a cocksucker is really what you want. Sucking cock needs to be more important to you than your wife, your health and your reputation because that is what you're really fucking with.

The guys here cheer you on because they want this for you as badly as they want it for themselves. They live vicariously through all the guys who are getting cock. Or maybe they cheer you on because they have a unicorn wife who has allowed them to fulfill their fantasies and it's all worked out A-ok for them.
The guys who cheer you on have nothing to lose in this.
Don't ask the guys what you should do. Ask yourself what you are willing to lose to be a cocksucker. Because that is really what your reality will be.

[twilson22001]

Well, as it turns out there was a major development but certainly not the one I expected. I talked to the wife last night about scheduling a meeting with the new guy. She then told me that she isn't really feeling it anymore and wants to take a break from the lifestyle, maybe permanently. I asked offhandedly, "Well, can I just suck his dick then?" She replied, "Sure." We talked about it for a little while but then she said, "I hope you're not serious! That's disgusting!" We talked some more and I finally admitted that I had thought about it and it would be an understatement to say that she was not pleased. She said, as she has said in the past, that "there is no such thing as 'bi' but only gay and straight; if you're a guy and you suck another guy's dick, you're gay." We discussed it briefly but it was obvious that she was not receptive to the idea.

Interesting that a wife who is open enough to swing is that close minded. Maybe her real issue is wanting things to just be the two of you since she's also wanting to quit the lifestyle. Good luck.

[KDaddy23]

It's the worst possible situation to be married and bisexual. Some of us are, indeed, lucky to be with a woman who doesn't have a problem with us sucking dick. Obviously, some of us aren't even when we're with a woman who is willing to open up the relationship for additional sex because that's one thing... but anything that looks gay isn't allowed. It's at this point where guys can either continue to lobby with her to be able to do this, cheat and do it, or just give up because she's not gonna change her mind (and no matter how well you can present your argument), most guys really don't want to cheat, and the relationship is deemed to be more important than this is.

Why cheer him on? Because those of us who have already gone through this (1) knows how hard it is to accomplish and (2) why wouldn't we want him to experience this in the way that we're able to? The reality, however, says that, at best, we can wish him lots of luck in this while, after reading what he's been saying, well, the only luck he has with this is the bad kind. It is what it is. Should he keep talking to her about it and on the slim chance that she just might change her mind? Cheat? Just give up? Only he knows the answer to that.

[Long Duck Dong]

JB your wifes stance makes interesting reading...... and in a way, it also makes sense, and brings up a statement by a female friend of mine that a lot of things that make sense to a female will never make any sense to a guy cos a guy had a cock...... so I will word it the way she sees it.....

sex is a physical act which is heterosexual or gay / lesbian.... lesbian sex is regarded as two females having sex....gay sex is two men having sex......

Now bisexuals tend to blur the lines by saying their attraction to males and females, changes the sexual aspect and so two males having sex, is not homosexual but bisexual and that two females having sex is not lesbian, if the person is bisexual but that is flawed cos if the other person is gay or lesbian, it does not change their sexuality..... and so it would mean that one person is having gay / lesbian sex and the other person is having bisexual sex....... lol

You posted this * I asked her, "if a girl licks pussy, does that mean she's a lesbian?" She said, "Of course not. It's a double standard, yes, but it is what it is. If a guy does it, he's gay."...... . you are mixing sexuality with sexual interaction..... but also she is right, it is a double standard because of the way that we tend to apply sexuality to sex with one gender but not with the other......

Now your partner has made her thoughts clear on you sucking a guys cock, makes you gay..... if I have read right, she has not said NO you can not do it.....but she may be thinking that you are springboarding from straight to gay and she may end up losing you, where as you are thinking you are bi and have no plans to leave her.....and that may be why she is starting to pull back from the swinging lifestyle because its going from safe and secure fun to something more serious in her mind where you are going off with other guys for gay sex and that may impact on your relationship with your partner.........

like I said at the start, females can often think different in terms of sex and sexuality to males, or as my friend puts it, a cock warps any guys thinking.....the hardest thing to do, is going to be understanding what is going through your partners mind, that shes NOT saying to you.....

[Johnyonenut]

Women and men just think differently about everything. Whether it's sex or washing dishes

[RisingBi]

"Jason", I agree with Fresia, KDaddy23, & Long Duck Dong, but I have to go even further than they did. To start off with, I want you to know that I really want you, and your wife, to be as happy as possible and experience the least amount of suffering. And I think that can only happen if you take one of only two routes: either leave her so that you can live freely as a bisexual man that has sex with both men and women, if that desire is really strong within you, or forget about having sex with men. I am positive that cheating on her will cause you both a greater amount of suffering, much more than either of these two other scenarios.

I know we all want our cake and eat it too. But it's rarely possible. Yes, I have never been married, so one could say, what do I know? But I have listened to a lot of people with much greater wisdom that I have. And the wisest say that cheating on your partner always ends in great suffering one way or another. The problem is we ALL have so much uncontrolled desire, for so many things, and it constantly gets us into trouble when we follow those desires. We just have to take control of our own minds! Me included!!

If you love your wife, do you want to cause her that kind of suffering? You will suffer from all kinds of suffering when she finds out about your cheating, from all that you have lost with the end of a marriage (love, companionship, social aspects, financial aspects, etc.). Plus you will lose your good reputation amongst all your family, relatives, and friends. But worst of all you will experience the suffering of seeing her suffering from her life being totally torn apart, her heart shredded, her trying to process the unimaginable betrayal, her inability to trust again, her loss of her own reputation, and so much more. Do you really want that?

Get divorced, or keep things in your fantasies only. Don't you think those are your two best choices? The alternative is horrible! Really meditate on that alternative, realize it, so it prevents your mind from taking you down a really dark path. Good luck, my friend. ❤️

[Bidirectional4u]

I'm really torn. The wife and I talked a little more tonight and she said she was "appalled" that I would want to give head to another guy. There's never going to be any changing her mind, I can clearly see that. I can also see that bringing it up again will only serve to damage our relationship.

I really crave giving head and this guy is like a unicorn in that he wants me to be his on-call cocksucker and come over two or three times a week and use my mouth. I've fantasized about just such an arrangement for many, many years. He only lives about 20 minutes from me and has a lot of availability. I have adjustable work hours so it would work perfectly and I could meet him almost anytime while my wife is at work.

I don't want to cheat on my wife but I can't even describe how badly I want to suck this guy's dick (again and again).


Bummer to hear, wife and I are both BI, she loves watching me suck cock, gets off helping me too. I get off watching her get fucked by a nice big cock, then get to clean her out afterwards and clean him up as well. Were still looking for a guy to join us on a regular basis, you'd think that would be easy, but lots of strange out there.

[MAcpl69]

8 years ago I told my wife I was bi and liked anal play, which I slowly started to introduce, i.e. leaving a butt plug in the bathroom etc. She eventually started pegging me with a strapon and even lets me fuck her ass. About 3 weeks ago she agreed to an open marriage. Once this virus shit ends I will be on the hunt for a big cock to play with. Never say never!