Made the break! Left wife this morning..Starting new life as open bisexual

[Grant_Norman]

Well, I've been talking about it...finally did it...sitting at airport waiting for plane...from now on, open bisexual here!

[sysper]

wishing u lots of dicks...& pussies! :D but more seriously wishing u will adjust soon and start taking healthy advantage of the changes in ur life.

[csreef]

Good luck my Friend!

Keep us all posted on the adventures of your NEW LIFE! :bibounce::flag4::flag3:

[Robtiti]

Congrats at good luck! Where ya headed? Stay safe out there!

[playful808]

Oral, I think we are all excited for you.

On divorce:
please be kind to yourself, take care of your health. This is a lot of stress. Don’t put extra pressure on yourself. Give yourself space to be upset, and authentically mourn the past. And actually learn from it, without bitterness. Then bury it, and move on, cause the future is brighter.

On moving on:
They say living well is the best revenge. It’s a good start. Better still is not caring about revenge. Live in the present moment, not the past.

On being single:
if you are really cutting all ties to the past, and you want your new life to be a success, then you need to set new roots and make new connections, not just NSA ones. Real friendships are real roots.

On being openly bi:
if you have been closeted your whole life, you might discover that you have a whole lifetime of habits to break. Habits of cognition, communication, emotion. Deep Stuff to unlearn. Might take a while. Let it. And don’t ever let anyone put you back in any closet again.

Be well.

[Greenie1]

Great words there, playfull!

[GayGuy04]

Hey good for you hope everything works out for you and what you want

[redngoldpride]

Ok you beautiful sexual person be safe , be happy , enjoy life

[Grant_Norman]

Oral, I think we are all excited for you.

On divorce:
please be kind to yourself, take care of your health. This is a lot of stress. Don’t put extra pressure on yourself. Give yourself space to be upset, and authentically mourn the past. And actually learn from it, without bitterness. Then bury it, and move on, cause the future is brighter.

On moving on:
They say living well is the best revenge. It’s a good start. Better still is not caring about revenge. Live in the present moment, not the past.

On being single:
if you are really cutting all ties to the past, and you want your new life to be a success, then you need to set new roots and make new connections, not just NSA ones. Real friendships are real roots.

On being openly bi:
if you have been closeted your whole life, you might discover that you have a whole lifetime of habits to break. Habits of cognition, communication, emotion. Deep Stuff to unlearn. Might take a while. Let it. And don’t ever let anyone put you back in any closet again.

Be well.

Thanks...really looking forward to it all...yes, I have (and do) love my wife dearly, but for me, I just can't live with her craziness anymore...and it is not just about the bi stuff and oral/anal sex...it is much more about just learning to feel who I am and take the opportunities when I can.. .which really is when there is an opportunity for sex or relationship with anyone I can take it.

Yes, I have no intentions of clouding my life with any bitterness....just today, I could not believe how great it felt just to be out with people...they all looked so good...happy/unhappy, just real people...I intend to travel and enjoy all of them I can and feel their sexual pleasures when the opportunities arise, but jut the pleasure of being with men or women and experiencing them.

Tomorrow I hit my first destination where I'll stay...5 days or 6 months...I'll figure out as I go

[Grant_Norman]

Congrats at good luck! Where ya headed? Stay safe out there!
....Thanks...I'm headed wherever...I'll know when I get there

[SilkyHoseLover]

I truly wish you well, that you find continued health and a new sense of peace and happiness.

But I'm also mindful of the others you are leaving behind. I hope this turns out to be the best of all worlds for your entire family, and that any pain and anxiety that they feel at this juncture quickly subsides.

[playful808]

> just can't live with her craziness anymore...

You can not have a healthy relationship or marriage with an UNhealthy person. And NPD is toxic.

[Mitmer]

Best of luck to you!

[Grant_Norman]

Well, very long day...people are nice where I've gone....we'll see how it goes....have significantly reduced expenses so matter how divorce turns out Ishold be okay. Thanks for all well wishes and encouragement. Yes, as Playful said, living wit someone with NPD is just plain toxic, and even though I have loved my wife dearly, even if she tried to recover, there's about a 95% chance she would ever admit NPD and only about 1% chance she would seek and succeed with recovery . Terrible for a loved one to have condition they can't even see ... worse to live with it

[playful808]

It is awful to admit, but some people are broken in ways that can never be fixed. Healthy intimate relationships will never be an option for them, not even a choice.

(The crazy woman in my past had Borderline Personality Disorder. After that, I promised myself “no more crazy lovers”.)

I hope you detox and make new friends, heal and talk and whore around a little. This is a crazy time to be traveling, please be safe.

[Oborokybiman]

Stay grounded, peace within and respect across the board. Take care and remember you spent 1/2 of your life being someone you aren’t, enjoy the other full 1/2 fully

[Grant_Norman]

It is awful to admit, but some people are broken in ways that can never be fixed. Healthy intimate relationships will never be an option for them, not even a choice.

(The crazy woman in my past had Borderline Personality Disorder. After that, I promised myself “no more crazy lovers”.)

I hope you detox and make new friends, heal and talk and whore around a little. This is a crazy time to be traveling, please be safe.

Thanks Playful, you are always so wise. It's been a few days now and although a tiny bit of me misses routine of my wife, I am overall still very, very gad I did it. I feel so opened up now...talking with guys and girls openly expressing who I am. Haven't had need/opportunity to broach my biness with anyone, but I am not concerned.....just being open to everyone and if it comes up, male or female, i will act on it because i do so love oral sex of any kind...also liked receiving anal and haven't had as much as i would like.

But the real matter is the freedom to explore sex with anyone I find...I'm really so very horny for the closeness. If nothing happpens I'm okay, but would prefer some nice physical contact.

One of my regulars back in PA invited me to come stay with him and his partner...that was fall back option if COVID-19 stopped my travel...fortunately I didn't have to fall back, although it certainly would have been nice to have two cocks to suck every day or more. Still, my getting away and reclaiming my freedom was what was most important.

Yes, there is/and will be some shock to recover from....I think I'm resolved to get through it all.

If travel ever opens up again I will try to make it to Hawaii sometime...would really like to meet you and your wife and say 'hello' in person.

Oral

[Grant_Norman]

Stay grounded, peace within and respect across the board. Take care and remember you spent 1/2 of your life being someone you aren’t, enjoy the other full 1/2 fully

Thanks for kind words...yes, exploring who I really am without weight of toxic marriage is already very freeing. Thanks again.

[playful808]

Thanks! Yeah, IF travel even opens up again… Weird times.
I think the current crisis might become the new normal for many months fo come.

Your bisexual emancipation is occurring during a very interesting month.

Please play safe, especially with older guys who have health problems.

Last I heard, they do NOT know if the virus travels in semen, but they do know it likes the mouth.
https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/hcp/faq.html

If you are horny for touch and can’t find anyone, consider getting a good non-sexual massage.

[Oborokybiman]

You are welcome! Love reading the posts here. It inspires me to keep my mind and heart open for people who are gentle with their ways.

[Grant_Norman]

Thanks! Yeah, IF travel even opens up again… Weird times.
I think the current crisis might become the new normal for many months for come.

Your bisexual emancipation is occurring during a very interesting month.

Please play safe, especially with older guys who have health problems.



Yeah, I'm currently trapped (freed?) out of the US am sure I couldn't (or maybe ever want to) return. All the craziness of white old man politicians...my age group...who are just concerned about only themselves and their money. I wish the country would be completely taken over by 35-50 year-olds and there would not necessarily be term limits on politicians, but mandatory retirement from politics at 65.

[MAcpl69]

Big decision hope it goes well. Stay strong!

[chtampa]

I can't understand the big deal about being Bi, or any of the other preferences, and having to announce it to anyone. Did you at some time in your life announce to a large group that you were heterosexual in order to belong to that group and now need to make amends for it? Why this big reliance to be accepted. My opinion of what someone believes my orientation to be has no bearing towards anything in my life. My identity is not my sexuality. Why is someone elses opinion of you so important?

[Grant_Norman]

I can't understand the big deal about being Bi, or any of the other preferences, and having to announce it to anyone. Did you at some time in your life announce to a large group that you were heterosexual in order to belong to that group and now need to make amends for it? Why this big reliance to be accepted. My opinion of what someone believes my orientation to be has no bearing towards anything in my life. My identity is not my sexuality. Why is someone elses opinion of you so important?

I am not seeking anyone's opinion but do want them to know I'm open to sucking their cock if they would like. Just first my first guy and we talked for couple hours on all kinds of things. He was quite cool and very pleasant and I told him the whole ordeal of leaving NPD wife and yes, I did tell him I was bi and liked to suck cock. Don't know if he will get horny and want to give me a load, but at least he knows and jut across hall room. Also, he is unmarried and I wanted to see how he would react...nothing really, but that was okay. He's in room across hall so he may show up later for BJ...in any case, was nice to actually tell a guy and see if he replied me too.

[Grant_Norman]

Big decision hope it goes well. Stay strong!

Thanks...working on it...got email from wife this morning...LOVE BOMBING has started. My bi friends invited me to stay with them ...only a half hour from my house...a letter like that could have broken me to return...fortunately I'm at least a day away of course the LOVE BOMB is all bullshit for her to try and get me back under her control...I didn't bite at all....there was stuff she said to me that I hadn't heard in twenty years of marriage

[playful808]

If love alone could heal serious mental health issues, no one would be sick or unhappy.

Still. She might be upset, insecure, genuinely freaked out about you leaving. Add the virus crisis. Timing.

I know you are angry, but if possible, be kind and be fair and take the high road.
If she is on her own for this crisis, tell her so clearly, and without anger.

Perhaps arrange grocery delivery for her from Safeway.
I trust you to do the right thing.

[sysper]

ideally i agree. shouldn't matter. unfortunately anything outside of heterosexuality is not as normalized, people start being treated like shit if there holding the hand of someone of the same sex or kissing. so there's a need for it.
I can't understand the big deal about being Bi, or any of the other preferences, and having to announce it to anyone. Did you at some time in your life announce to a large group that you were heterosexual in order to belong to that group and now need to make amends for it? Why this big reliance to be accepted. My opinion of what someone believes my orientation to be has no bearing towards anything in my life. My identity is not my sexuality. Why is someone elses opinion of you so important?

[Grant_Norman]

If love alone could heal serious mental health issues, no one would be sick or unhappy.

Still. She might be upset, insecure, genuinely freaked out about you leaving. Add the virus crisis. Timing.

I know you are angry, but if possible, be kind and be fair and take the high road.
If she is on her own for this crisis, tell her so clearly, and without anger.

Perhaps arrange grocery delivery for her from Safeway.
I trust you to do the right thing.

You're too kind Playful...I've watched/read several hours from NPD specialists and she is reacting the typical way....again, I do love her ad am not really angry (although I wish she could've not been NPD) and for HER it is all very real and plays into her fantasy persona she has created. How can anyone be mad at someone who genuinely believes that she loves and care like that, that she's a conservative Christian AND avid Trump supporter (He who has publicly shown and broken most , if not all 10 Commandments and not to even mention all his anti Christ doctrines he ignores - he is also extreme NPD).

No, I have no intentions to be cruel to her other than respond with silence...I will no longer react to ANY of her loving baiting, which would turn to sighs, frowns, anger outbursts, nasty criticisms, and more within days or weeks if I returned.

Sorry, but ghosting is only way I can deal with her.

<<Still. She might be upset, insecure, genuinely freaked out about you leaving. Add the virus crisis. Timing.>>

For her, I'm sure she feels that, but the reality is , under NPD, she REALLY doesn't care for me.

[chtampa]

ideally i agree. shouldn't matter. unfortunately anything outside of heterosexuality is not as normalized, people start being treated like shit if there holding the hand of someone of the same sex or kissing. so there's a need for it.

I would think that normalized is the hinge point. If alternative sexuality is normal for you, who can say different? I believe that preferences are no more different than black or white partners or blonde or brunette ones. Does this insinuate that there is a normal and abnormal? My point is that your preference is your own business and having the need to broadcast it perpetuates the issue. You can't admit to being "different" and then be surprised that you are treated "different". I enjoy sex with people and don't find that to be different enough to broadcast.

[sysper]

i agree normal is relative. but in society heterosexuality is still the norm. maybe it's not so much a matter of identity as it is survival or freedom. people see 2 opposite sex people kiss & it's not a big deal. but if it's 2 same sex people especially if it's 2 guys don't tell me they don't risk literally getting beaten up or even killed in certain places the str8 couple doesn't need to worry about.i resent i even have to say this but that's the reality of the lgbt community.
I would think that normalized is the hinge point. If alternative sexuality is normal for you, who can say different? I believe that preferences are no more different than black or white partners or blonde or brunette ones. Does this insinuate that there is a normal and abnormal? My point is that your preference is your own business and having the need to broadcast it perpetuates the issue. You can't admit to being "different" and then be surprised that you are treated "different". I enjoy sex with people and don't find that to be different enough to broadcast.

[playful808]

… ghosting is only way I can deal with her.

I get it. She wants to pull you back into her, her, her movie. And out of yours.
Cutting her off might be the only realistic way to avoid that.

I guess I am more concerned with you. Spoken to your therapist?
You are far from home and friends and support, during this very weird event.
I hope you meet someone nice, make a new friend.

[Grant_Norman]

I get it. She wants to pull you back into her, her, her movie. And out of yours.
Cutting her off might be the only realistic way to avoid that.

I guess I am more concerned with you. Spoken to your therapist?
You are far from home and friends and support, during this very weird event.
I hope you meet someone nice, make a new friend.

Yes, so everything would once again be about her,her, her. She was very loving to me in a lot of ways, but it was still a prison. I've met so many nice and wonderful people out here...even offered a blow job to one guy, and he graciously declined but it still to tell him how I liked to suck cock. It is a new freedom in so many ways.

No, I did not have any friends (except my two bi guys regulars), my family is all dead, and my kids are pretty just hung up on their own issues.So I'm off in the world experiencing and meeting several very pleasant folks. I'm hoping it will only continue to gt better.

[emerging]

Hi Oral, I remember you from SBG. Be careful, things are getting worse.

[Grant_Norman]

Hi Oral, I remember you from SBG. Be careful, things are getting worse.

Thanks...haven't seen any action lately and tucked away in a COVID-19 free zone

[Grant_Norman]

So hid away in Central American country, alone in a hostel with nice younger host next 30 days or so...after few more days I will out myself to him and offer him daily blow jobs...will see if he'd like to enjoy...would be great way to pass lock down...will need to approach gently, but by next week he will know that I am bi and he can have blow job any time. Wish me luck.

[KDaddy23]

Wow... when you said you were gonna get away, you seriously got away!

[Grant_Norman]

Wow... when you said you were gonna get away, you seriously got away!

Yeah...USA is too expensive for me until a divorce settlement and only 3 COVID-19 cases reported in entire country as of today...lot lower than USA, right?

[KDaddy23]

There is that!

[playful808]

… and only 3 COVID-19 cases reported in entire country as of today...lot lower than USA, right?

We’ve been looking at several nations in central america for retirement. With 3 cases, I suspect I know which one you are in. The entire health care system there might be more fragile - infrastructure & utilities too. You be careful there, we care about you.

[Grant_Norman]

We’ve been looking at several nations in central america for retirement. With 3 cases, I suspect I know which one you are in. The entire health care system there might be more fragile - infrastructure & utilities too. You be careful there, we care about you.


Thanks....yes, I thought about that to some extent...if things got bad for me (and they'd really have to get bad) I'm only a few hour plane trip to Houston (great medical facilities - lived there 17 yeas), for $200 flight, and Have Medicare part A,B and D....emergency, I may be out of luck...but for most part, I'm pretty okay for having serious ailments...in USA I'd sometimes have as many as 3 Drs appt a week..all seemed to be mostly so they could prescribe drugs and bill medicare! WTF...would much rather be sucking cock or getting a load up the ass!

[GayGuy04]

Hope you are doing ok :) and having a good time exploring your bisexuality side

[DD788Snipe]

Wow!! Oral. You are livin the dream buddy. Be careful down there but enjoy. ;) I'm jealous.

[Grant_Norman]

Wow!! Oral. You are livin the dream buddy. Be careful down there but enjoy. ;) I'm jealous.

Well, it has been just about a month since I left my wife. Doing okay, but do miss her company. My two bi friends in PA have actually contacted me a lot more and offered a place to live with them...would love beig able to suck and swallow every day, but for now, I do not want to be back in USA>

Since I have been communicating a little with the wife via email...and since this country is locked down and not letting anyone in, I shared with her where I am. Fr all here, I am in Orange Walk Town, Belize. I was just going to be here for a couple weeks, but country has locked down so I can't even travel out of district.

The hostel I'm staying at...a really very pleasant 40 -year-old guy runs...I have not yet let on to him I'm bi, but have talked a bit with him about relationships...the 2 of us are here alone, and of course, if he wanted to have regular sex I would be happy to take care of him...will see.

Since I cant go anywhere else, he did agree to change me to a monthly rate instead of nightly, so I should be able to afford. Just spend most time in room. Did go to store today. Have refrigerator in room so cook and eat here.

When country releases lock down, will probably travel some more. Still no real desire to get back to USA. There was a US Embassy arranged flight to Houston today, but really just didn't want to get back to USA now. Their lock down seems to be working...0 COVID-19 cases in district I am in...in entire country there has only been 10 cases and 1 death...(of course they do not have level of testing as many other countries, but still monitoring hospitals fr cases turning up)

So will see..would be great if I could start having MM sex again...but nothing looks promising other than slight chance with hostel owner...will see

[playful808]

Glad you are safe.

[tenni]

What is the Beliz government about same sex activity?
A google search comes up with
"Belize also has a law prohibiting foreign homosexuals from entering the country, although the law has never been enforced."

" Belize also has a law prohibiting foreign homosexuals from entering the country, although the law has never been enforced."

Same sex activity has only been made legal in 2016 in Belize and that was because of their Supreme Court not the majority of citizens.

I'm not sure that you are safe under the Covid-19 circumstances and being a foreigner in such a place. Great that so far Belize has low Covid-19 affects. It must be lonely for you. I would get my arse back to your own country asap.

[Robtiti]

Be safe over there!

[emerging]

Wow, Belize. Nice country, spent a bit of time in Xcalak Mexico, just north of there. Belize is more expensive than many other Central American countries but still affordable. Good luck, be safe, enjoy the sunshine. We are still chilly on the East Coast, spring is struggling to arrive.
FWIW: I love Colombia S.A. and CHile.

[csreef]

Belize! . . . Damn, you are Livin' the Dream! This morning it was snowing here!

Be Safe, Stay safe, love safe.

P.s. , Post some pics of the Tropics and your "Adventures" on your profile page.

[GayGuy04]

Be safe :bibounce:

[Grant_Norman]

Thanks to everyone for well wishes. Yes, not the best country for bi/gay activity, but will see. I am basically alone here (except for hostel owner) but that's okay...exercising, resting, watching some porn and movies, just hanging out....still trying to rid self of wife shit for 20 years(+20 years for previous wife). Both were NPD.

Thinking a lot about my bisexuality and really regretting all the inactive years. Thought a lot about my love for cock and realized that I have been bi all my life...just not acting on it. (A few times occasionally, but when I turned 14 it was all about pussy and wanting a woman to truly love me).

Wish I had just acted on what I truly felt deep down. I truly wish I had a wife that seriously loved me, but sex all along should've been mostly with guys. i am EXTREMELY sexual and never truly expressed it...thought I should just try the "societal" norm...now, looking back, I wish I had a wife who truly loved me but was also bi...we could've had great sex experiences with both men, women and couples.

You guys here that may be trying to decide on your sexuality just go for it. Enjoy as much sex as you can...with men or women or both, but truly enjoy...see what comes to top of your list...I love MM sex so much, I wish I had been experiencing it all along except for the few times here and there and the regular MM sex I had from 7 -14.

Back then, there was so much "anti-gay" pressure, we really were trapped in hetero route...sorry it was that way for me...though I may not have the level of activity I did when the Craigslist ads were available, couple years ago, I still plan to have as much sex as I can...with guys or girls...it is just so wonderful to feel another human cumming and enjoy it. My goal then is to make as many people cum as I can for the rest of my life.

[Grant_Norman]

What is the Beliz government about same sex activity?
A google search comes up with
"Belize also has a law prohibiting foreign homosexuals from entering the country, although the law has never been enforced."

" Belize also has a law prohibiting foreign homosexuals from entering the country, although the law has never been enforced."

Same sex activity has only been made legal in 2016 in Belize and that was because of their Supreme Court not the majority of citizens.

I'm not sure that you are safe under the Covid-19 circumstances and being a foreigner in such a place. Great that so far Belize has low Covid-19 affects. It must be lonely for you. I would get my arse back to your own country asap.

Actually, they now allow bisexuality, but it is nowhere near the acceptance level of USA or Europe